


Why Can’t I Get Over You?

by LadyinBlack



Series: It Sure Is Never Easy to be Yours [2]
Category: LeviHan - Fandom, Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Fuckbuddies, No strings attached relationship, Rough Sex, Sex, Sexual Content, levihan - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-22
Updated: 2015-12-24
Packaged: 2018-03-25 05:51:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 21
Words: 108,152
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3799126
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyinBlack/pseuds/LadyinBlack
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Summary and Author’s Notes:</p><p>Levi has always been a strong man, never wanting to be dependent onto someone or into anything. After sharing a night together with Hanji, he had found himself suddenly wanting more and more of her. This story is set after the events of Serious Pranks and Wrestlings to Love Makings and set before Because Proposing is Fcking Hard and Complicated but can stand on its own and not be related to my other fics, completely depending on what you like and think is the best.</p><p>This story is completely written due to my inspiration of Maroon 5’s song Animals and without a second I thought of making this right immediately and had it connected with my other fics as well. I totally got addicted with the song and thought that maybe Levi would feel pretty much the same way as according to the song’s message towards Hanji once he tries having sex with her.</p><p> This has been finished way back last December and has been reedited on January. I thought that maybe I needed to finish my other fics first, specifically I Never Wanted to Live Without You. </p><p>Anyway, have fun reading.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. You're the Only One I Want to Touch

**-x-**

**Chapter 1:**

**You're the Only One I Want to Touch  
**

 

 

 

**-x-**

 

Levi’s bed was shaking hard with the giggles of Hanji Zoe being heard from inside of his room.

Her hair was drawn to her shoulders, spread all over though and is in serious sweaty form as she pants and giggles to think that Levi is pressing his weight down on her, which she finds really heavy but tolerable. She had her back on him and he is straddling her from behind. She closed an eye and continued laughing as her hand made way towards his raven glossy hair whose head was just below the level of her shoulder, breathing hardly. In turn, he kissed her cheek and run his left hand from her breast to her clit.

“You sure do are having fun Shitty Glasses” and he bit her neck and she twitched her shoulder, almost nudging his nose.

“I always love how you can be very cuddly on me, Heichou” He smirked and had his right hand held on her waist tightly. Calling him captain suits well tonight since he is riding her perfectly well.

“Hmph. Cuddly huh?” He nuzzled his nose to her cheek and readied himself to thrust on her even harder, making her whimper a bit between her moans. He gave her a few more bites on her neck, her back and on her hand as well.

“So you call this cuddly?” he asked and gave her another long bite on her shoulder, making her cry out a bit louder.

“In the animal world, yeah”

He smirked and licked the last bite that he gave her then continued to push in and out of her. When he was about to cum, she took the towel on the bedside that she only uses for him, turned around to meet his dizzy gaze and wiped all of the white liquid once he pulled out and spread over the towel she had in her hand. She wiped everything from his length and threw the towel again on the side. After how many times they did this, she knew best to prepare something, _anything,_ to wipe Levi’s seed which are too much as she noted. He sure does have a lot and wondered how he does that.

He was panting very hard, out of breath and sweat drastically falling on her but the way she rubs his semen from his penis  makes him feel hard again and want another round.

He looked below him when she get rid of his milky white liquid and knew that his desirable organ is getting ready for another round. Hanji followed his gaze and knew what he felt. She instead placed her arms behind his neck and pulled him closer to her.

“Rest a bit first, you might strain yourself.” She smiled and gave his nose a little kiss. “You look tired too Levi” looking at him with concerned eyes.

“Tsk.” He looked away, disgust that she is right about not having another round and then submits to her sweet embrace. When he settled his head on the crook of her shoulder, she lightly patted and traced his back, her finger tips teasing his skin. Somehow, he enjoyed being inside her as they rode endlessly the way towards wonderland but having to just nuzzle beside her and be cuddled by her seems to be a better idea, something more calming that he enjoyed feeling until the very tip of his toes.

She kissed him in the cheek. “We still have a meeting with Erwin today” she whispers to him.

He nodded his head and replied “yeah, but let’s take a quick nap. I’ll wake you up when it’s time.” Levi usually is the first one to wake up on time every time that they have a sizzling time in bed and besides, both of them were tired and needed rest anyway.

They slept in that usual form of theirs, Levi on top of Hanji as she embrace him and submerge into a deep fast sleep, enjoying the beat of her heart that he is hearing as it helped him sleep.

 

**-x-**

Levi woke up by the side of Hanji, realizing that he rolled over away from her as they slept. He gazed at Hanji whose hand is still attached to his arm and hair everywhere. Levi thought that he could wake up to that kind of view everytime, finding her beautiful in the midst of her hair spreading everywhere. He never liked being honest with her about how he finds her beautiful even if she thinks she does not deserve of such word.

He slowly opened her fingers and had it free from its attachment to his arm as she nuzzled her nose on the pillow. He always abuses the every little moment that he could get with her so he could do the things he wanted to her but cannot do it outside their rooms. This time, he tucks her hair as his hand lightly descended into her head and slightly traced her face’s features. She looks unexpectedly beautiful whenever she is asleep and if he always lingered if he could actually ask her to behave when she’s awake so she’ll look maybe prettier but he didn’t want things to be forced into her, most especially when she doesn’t like it. Besides, the world would be very different and he will surely be bothered if Hanji would keep her mouth shut when she’s awake just trying to go with his standards of keeping herself beautiful. Most importantly, how can a very noisy woman like her be so beautiful when she’s so quiet?

He shrugged at the thought and moved quietly and sat by the bed. They were on his bedroom today and they had nothing else to do so he asked her if she’s okay to do it this afternoon. She did mentioned that she has something to do but also added that she could just do it anytime since it won’t need much focus on with anyway. He did said to just finish and do what she needed to do but she insisted and said that “you’re more important than my research, Levi” and gave him a sneaky kiss on his cheek when they were alone on her laboratory.

Those words of her were agonizing and sweet, knowing that he should not hear those kinds of words because he never deserve them and that no one had ever prioritize him over something they were obsessing with, most especially with work which is the very attitude of Hanji. Yet they sound so endearing and pleasant to his ears that it made his heart stopped a bit. Damn, she should know that she is pinching his heart.

And now, they find themselves on his room, bathe with sweat and just rested from that sexy time that they just got so busy with.

As he gazes down on her, Levi remembered everything about how they ended up having an ‘open sexual-relationship’ as she would have call it, and had it maintained between them without anyone knowing it. After that very night that they have revealed to each other their secrets and had ‘made love’ (he is still bothered by the latter word though, since he is sure he is still an alien to that word). As much as they have wanted to not to do it anymore, Levi found himself knocking hard on her door, panting and covered in sweat two nights after their very first together. Once she opened the door for him, he quickly pushed her to the wall and desperately opened her clothing, almost even having them torn apart, kissing her violently until they had released the burning feeling inside of them.

After that, they had found themselves in each other’s embrace, staring deep in each other’s eyes, realizing that there is no way for them to deny the obvious--- that they both needed ‘this’ and want it from each other. They have quickly discussed about their relationship and how they should handle it since they both knew they wanted to keep this kind of thing going between them but wanted no further deeper relationship than that.

One night that they had in her room, he did asked her why she agreed to keep doing it with him and just simply said that “a reminder that I am capable of doing such thing, to remind myself that I am a woman, that I am still alive and that to know you’re still alive.” She looked at him that night, with her serene, clear brown chocolate eyes and knew that she is honest of what she had said. Her words made Levi’s heart jump and look away, feeling that his face is heating up. He didn’t have any idea how to respond back to her honest answers that clearly came from her heart.

“Besides, a man needs sex at least twice a week to reduce the possible heart disease that you can get you know?”

“oh yeah, why would I get shitty heart diseases anyway?” he snorted.

“Well, you may not know. There are a lot of factors in the first place, like stress aside from illnesses or poor diet.” She turned to look at him but he didn’t let out any reply yet, so she figures that she should continue explaining. “You know, if the world will not die of titan’s wrath, then it would be from diseases, illnesses that cannot be cured. Maybe that is why I had always thought of donating my body parts if I’ll die.”

Levi suddenly nudged her hand on his torso, surprising her. “Don’t talk about dying shitty glasses.”

As much as he hated life, the way how it treated and brought him before he found a mission to accomplish in the Corps, he is sure that he is happy to see people living peacefully and to the fullest. Just like her, living life to the fullest, smiles and a brave heart in every challenge that she faces. He figures that even if he despised life, he still wanted to see her alive and well.

“How about you?” she asked back after he hears her reason why she agreed doing such thing with him as she lovingly traced his chest and rub his abdomen again.

He thought about his answer hard, making his screws on his head work, trying to come up with an answer that will make her feel at least _wanted_ by him even just a little. As always, his mouth is possessed and no matter how much he wanted to say something, another harsh word comes out of his mouth in a snap.

“Felt like it.” Her hand stopped and muttered ‘oh’ in response.

At least he is willing to do it with me, she thought.

Levi did bit his tongue hard for his uncomforting response and thought of the real reason why. He is suddenly feeling something queasy within his insides, and he did not know why. All he knows is that he _does_ like her, like a lot, more than she even liked herself, and wanted nothing but him to be shared with experiences like this by her.

And it made things worse for his part. As time passed by, he found himself staring longer at her and even becoming more concern towards her. His eye involuntarily twitches when he finds her laughing with some other guy in the middle of the afternoon and worried if she is not with her usual self or having mood swings and excessive cravings during her period and look for her desired food until night time. The way his hand tugs on her hair has tightened but made sure she is not hurting as his inner drive of pulling her and giving her a kiss in the middle of a stupid fucking boring meeting is getting hard to control so he could be waken up by those luscious lips of hers.

At the times of them being sexually busy with each other, he made his kisses longer than he ever wanted and even had his embrace get tighter on her all the time. He finds himself loving more of her body as he get to familiar with it. He nuzzles her neck as he nuzzles his nose into it and caresses her face with his thumbs. His heart is beating rapidly when he sees her in the middle of the hallway and would even feel his body shiver with delight whenever she would whisper into his ear, whisper his name or even trace any part of his body.

He didn’t know why or can’t explain how this even happened but all he knew that it is happening already beyond his efforts and it’s getting worse everyday.

He longs for her everyday and he too still can’t fully accept that yet. Hanji is to be blame for this, not his heart nor his mind or even his penis, he thought. Her personality and touches were what he craves the most, her presence and cheery aura were just the only things that liberates him from any sort of horrible thing that he feels within or from a bad day.

Somehow, he is indeed fond of how she made him feel wanted and be taken care of as she softens a lot of times now to him and sneaks a kiss when nobody is around. This is the first time he felt such pleasurable feeling and at the same time it is unwittingly sweet and tormenting.

Somehow, he felt confused.

To organize his thoughts a bit as he took one last glance at Hanji on the bed and made his way towards the kitchen counter and prepared for something to eat for the both of them. He took his opened shirt and wore it but didn’t bother to close it.

When he made way towards the kitchen, he can’t still stop the thought and feeling that he is having towards Hanji. He didn’t want any intimate relationship, most especially with a comrade and yet he enjoys the feeling of serenity and security that Hanji is giving to him. The maternal and sweet feeling that he never had from any woman was being given to him by her, and he is beyond grateful. He wanted to cut it off her and push her away so he won’t long for her but he can’t, no matter how much he tries to do it, something is seriously stopping him.

Nevertheless, he didn’t like the idea of anyone knowing about their intimate-slash-unexpected-sexual-relationship to avoid rumors that will bug them everyday, and somehow managed to keep it that way for almost ten months already.

They both agreed to limit their sexual encounters for at least twice a week and they were both alright with it. He didn’t want to push her towards her limits and if she feels like she doesn’t want to do it, he slightly nods and tries to control his urges in the process as well as his zippers up. He respects her decisions and he doesn’t mind it. Throughout the time, they had learned and respected what is to be done and shouldn’t.

But in the back of his head, one exception is clearly on his head that he is sure that he cannot accept--- and that is if Hanji leaves him for somebody else.

He knew perfectly that he doesn’t own her or shit, nor told her idea of ‘staying together’----- or lovers in short. He may not be certain about the fact that he might find somebody else better than her but his entire body and mind only longs for her and her body, no one else. It’s as though he has already memorized her body in all its aspects and its limitations and he just felt so much like in heaven when he is inside her, most especially when she caresses him until morning. He knows perfectly where he needs to caress her where she would like it the most and where she isn’t. Having that kind of ‘bond’ was a bit hard to get but eventually, with much trust with each other, they managed to stay open and maintain such relationship as weird as them. Both of them also realized that sharing bodies to each other this way was really liberating as well.

She was the very heaven that he never thought he could manage to dwell in. He had already made a new different connection with her through her body and he swears it’s fucking amazing.

True, he may not be able to taste nor try the body of other woman but why would he when Hanji’s body was already enough to satisfy him and drive him around like crazy? To share his body with her as the very first, even his first manly pleasures with her was just intensifying.

They sure maybe weird and weirder, most especially once they are together but Levi has an eerie feeling that they blend perfectly well to each other despite their differences, opposites and weirdness just like how cream blends well with coffee. Despite the sweetness of the cream to the bitterness of the coffee, and its pure white color to the black color of the latter, they are the best when blend well together.

“Everything alright?” Hanji already made her way towards the side of him and realized that he was staring at the coffee he was preparing for her. He nodded in response and continued to finish what he was doing.

Hanji grinned and gave him a peck in his cheek. Good thing she quickly made her way towards the table and prepared some bread and butter for her not to see how Levi blushed so bad. Just after thinking of their odd sudden relationship, he can’t help himself but to blush like that bad.

She quickly sat on the chair as Levi placed the cup of coffee for her and he held his cup of tea. He sipped quietly as Hanji bit every piece of bread and places butter on it. Somehow, she felt the glue gaze on her by Levi.

“You made me feel so tired and hungry” her statement send chills on his spine. She grinned at him by the lips and swallows hard. Is she aware that she has the capability to make someone feel so nervous?

Levi smirked. He felt astonished to see her with her shirt open like his on her chest, apparently enough to give him glimpses of her breasts and chest. He like seeing her in that way, just effortlessly attractive and weirdly seductive as her hair down to her shoulders, wearing her eye glasses and only underwear.

She glanced at the clock and was surprised to see that their meeting with Erwin was just less than ten minutes away and quickly stood up. Levi watched her wear her clothes but his eye twitched when she just closed her shirt with no bras inside.

“What are you doing?” He stood up and went beside her, wearing his clothes slowly.

“Ahm, wearing my clothes back?” and she slips her harness and ties her hair. She blinked confusingly at him.

“You didn’t wear this” he picked her bra on the floor and shoved it in front of her face.

She raised a questioning brow.

“Well, do you want everyone to see your nipples hardening under your shirt?” he asked mockingly at her. He is not fond of such thing to be viewed by other man aside from him. _What’s mine is mine_ , he thought.

He is indeed one selfish man.

“Ahm, I don’t think it’s that bad Levi” she answered questioningly.

Levi gritted his teeth and opened her shirt forcefully, almost ripping it into two, having her squeaked . “You’ll wear it, whether you like or not, Shitty Glasses.” He placed her bra onto her then bit her harshly on both breasts, hands holding on her rib to contain her in one place. His grip and bit were a bit hard and her eye twitched in suddenness, she is sure that it will mark hard against her skin.

“Levi! What are you doing?” she shrieked.

He didn’t answer and just continued to bit her. She didn’t fight back, knowing that it would be pretty useless and waited as he finishes. The two of them were panting when he finishes and he slid her slender body onto her yellow long sleeve shirt then her brown jacket. He was pleased enough when he didn’t saw any sign of her delicious chest beneath those clothing.

“You don’t fucking do that again.” He turned around and finished clothing himself up.

She pouted. “Why not?”

 _Am I not enough to see those breasts of yours?_ He desperately wanted to ask her that but he shouldn’t be forgetting that he doesn’t have any right to do such thing towards her since she is not even _his_ to be greedy for with any man. Besides, does she treat him that way towards other woman?

Perhaps not.

He turned around to meet her gaze. “Just because.” Hanji groaned in disgust, Levi always leaving her with unanswered questions or mainly hanging answers back. Why won’t he just always answer her properly? “or else I might punish you again.” He added back.

Like always, she decided to obey his rules of weird security measures.

“Sorry” she mumbles.

He quickly tugs his hand on her hair and pulls her down and stare at her intensively. It’s fun to think that despite his greediness when it comes to her and keeping it to himself, she still gladly follows. He just wished she’ll do that with no questions asked, it’s making him dizzy whenever she’ll ask since he can’t provide her with a good answer.

She bit his lower lip and he quickly opened his eyes and smirked as she squeezed his groin lightly with her hands. “I’ll be seeing you later in the meeting, Captain” and she kissed him in the corner of his lip.

Despite their agreement of no further intense touching or kissing, she still does it though when they are alone together and that would be whether inside or outside of their rooms. He got used to it eventually not knowing when she started doing such thing and when he just shrugged it off and let her. Besides, he knew how she could get too clingy onto some people as well so why would it matter if she is clingy with him as well? He won’t deny that he liked it anyway but he never told her so or showed her that he does. He guesses it is part of her personality so he just let her grope or sneak a kiss onto him. It would be unpleasant too if they would argue.

He was left blushing on his own inside the room as Hanji made her way towards the door first.

 


	2. You Can FInd Other Fish in the Sea

**Chapter 2:**

**You Can Find Other Fish in the Sea**

**-x-**

The meeting went smoothly as usual as how the Recon Corps was being evaluated by the townspeople and by the people in the upper hierarchy which displayed high numbers as usual, much to Erwin’s and everyone’s happiness. At the same time, Erwin has mentioned to them about the new members of the Recon Corps that had originated from Military Police and has decided to transfer to the Recon Corps. Erwin cannot disagree on such fabulous volunteers since they are already running out of soldiers in line for the missions outside before the year even ends.

The meeting, no matter how ideal or logical it is still made Levi tired and sleepy. Seeing through his peripheral vision, he saw Hanji yawning and face flat on her palm. She doesn’t usually get sleepy or bored during meetings most especially if she is the one assigned to talk or to take part but if she doesn’t, she can get bored and be mentally absent like he does.

Hanji too was aware of Levi’s drowsiness so she lightly caressed Levi’s groin as though they are still not yet done from a while ago even if she wasn’t sleepy enough to do such a thing towards him. It’s a good thing that her hands were sneaky and no one could actually see what she was doing. He didn’t even bothered swatting her hand away since he knew why she is doing it, to keep them both awake and it is working. Levi in turn just smirked throughout the entire meeting.

Erwin told them to meet the new members of the Recon Corps since they were all in the higher position and are needed to thank them the least or just show them a small amount of gratitude.

Hanji separates with Levi and made way towards the hall to meet the new members of the Recon Corps with Moblit in tow. Hanji, like Erwin, smiled and welcomed warmly all of the members one by one since they aren’t that many as expected. Somehow, she was also able to talk to them one after the other regarding their thought about the Recon Corps and why they have made such bold movement to transfer in to their field.

Levi was proud seeing her like that, perfectly sociable and welcoming, totally opposite of him--- cold, unwelcoming and just not sociable. He’s proud to see her having such warm attitude towards the majority. He thought that her presence and the way she acts towards their soldier will help them gain more soldiers and help them dedicate their lives for humanity, it would be a very big thing.

But suddenly, the blow of the wind change.

It all started when Hanji suddenly tripped down the floor but was caught by the waist by a tall man, a bit inches taller than Hanji, has brown hair, green eyes and perfectly charming smile. It made Levi’s eye twitch all of a sudden. _What the fuck? Did she just do that in purpose?_ He hoped she didn’t. Besides, Hanji was given to be a bit clumsy, especially when she fails to fix her eye glasses.

“Sorry” she muttered and smiled shyly. She fixed herself upon standing and scratched her head as she looked up to her savior.

“Don’t mention it, miss pretty lady” Hanji was caught unaware of the words of the guy and her eyes just flashed as alive as ever.

“T-tthanks.” She blushed and looked away, can’t believe she is blushing because of this guy when all she knew that it was only Levi that could make her blush.

He smiled generously at her then Moblit came out of nowhere. “Are you alright squad leader?” he asked worriedly.

“Yy-yeah. Yes I am.” She looked up to the guy again and he is still looking at her and she dared to stare back. She can’t deny that he is indeed handsome, skin perfectly shaved, nose still cute despite being crooked.

“So you’re a squad leader? My deepest apologies for my attitude, ma’am.” she watched him held her hand and place a small kiss on it. Her mouth was open and she’s blushing hard, heart beating fast. It’s the first time that some man showed such chivalry and gentleman like attitude towards her. And his actions were so antique that it is rarely being done by the living man of their present world.

Hanji gazed at the young man’s curly brown her and expressive eyes. She grinned widely at how their hair colors are the same and eyes expressive just like hers as well, giving her heart an excited beat.

“Yy-yyes I am! Haha!” she giggled and tries to pull her hand away from his but he tightened it and caressed it gently with his other hand.

“May I know your name then, Squad Leader?”

“Hanji--- Hanji Zoe” she smiled awkwardly. And oh goodness, his charming smile was just making it worse for her.

“Nice to meet you, Squad Leader Hanji Zoe. I’m Georges Bellicoffe, I am a transfer volunteer from the Military Police” he said and he gave her a soft squeeze in the hand.

Hanji was astonished by his super manly manner. “It’s nice to meet you, Georges Bellicoffe” and she grinned at him like her usual self.

Her smile suddenly disappeared when Levi suddenly came out of nowhere and took her other hand and gripped on it hard like his life depended on her hand. “Me too and Hanji now is needed to be talked by the captain privately” Levi said in his blank pale voice, but giving the new guy a hard stare. He was surprised that he doesn’t know him where he guesses that he is supposed he knew him already.

“May I know who that captain is?” Georges asked.

“Me.” Levi responded icily. He just wanted to dispose this guy away.

Georges saw that there is no chance to talk with Hanji for a while so he turned his smile back at her and lowered his level. “’Til we meet again, Squad leader” Georges grinned at them both and gave Hanji a last kiss on her palm as he bent down with his gracefulness on his body and managed to give her a wink that made her blush again. Levi stared in disagreement, can’t believe how his hard stare doesn’t seemed to take effect on the guy. Doesn’t he had any idea how he can strangle him to death without a problem?

Hanji can’t do anything but just stare in awe at the man in front of her, making her feel that he sure is something else. Until he made his steps away from them, Hanji can’t help herself but to stare at him, blushing wildly.

“Shitty Glasses” Levi started. This is the first time he is seeing Hanji act this way, and it doesn’t make him happy about it.

She was startled to see Levi beside her, despite he was already holding her hand hard and about to pull her somewhere else.

“Oh, hello Levi” she said dreamily. She managed to smile at him awkwardly and looked at her hand being held by Levi. She frowned. “What is it?”

Levi stared at her straight in the face in bewilderment. Usually, she’ll ask him sweetly but this time her tone changed all of a sudden to think nothing is bothering her to speak on that kind of voice. He let go of her hand and whimpered “nothing.” Moblit was surprised to all of he is seeing and was surprised to hear from Levi said “nothing” when he thought he would be talking to her privately. As her assistant, he sure does can feel and see lot new and weird things from them both. The sudden slow touches on each other and the way she smiled at him was very different.

As Moblit sees Levi look at Hanji in a different way and how he would smirk a lot at her sent him messages that there is _definitely_ something going on around the two of them.

 

 

**-x-**

At the first few days, it was a nice thing that the new transferred recruits were to work on their duties separately from the original members until they could adjust by their daily schedules and activities. It made Levi feel out of worry for Hanji and the way she acted before towards him was no longer done again, much to his worry.

The new guy Georges Bellicoffe was a bit good in the field and his statistics were found high and was told by Erwin to be chosen by one of the highest leaders. Erwin first told Levi about it one afternoon on his office and he was furious about the news.

“He should be in my squad, since you said yourself that he was good enough.” He said, tone a bit sarcastic. There would be no way for Hanji to choose him first nor get him into her squad since he is sure it won’t look good, he’ll just end up flirting with Hanji almost everyday if that’ll be the case.

“Yes indeed Levi but you handpick your own squad.”

“I know so I choose him now.” He is sure that his squad won’t be good on this new guy, most especially if he has a bad attitude. He won’t be able to tolerate Olou’s mocking attitude, Erd and Gunther’s bossy attitude and Petra’s usual elbow hitting on the guys.

Erwin studied Levi momentarily and the nodded in agreement. “Be good to him then” he said huskily.

Oh he bet he will.

 

**-x-**

 


	3. Never Knew Completeness Like Being Here with You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -x-
> 
> First and foremost, I feel horribly bad because I have lost my latest edited chapters of this fic, but fortunately saved the entire draft copy of this entire fic. I was really heartbroken last night because I really gave my best shot on those edited chapters which is until chapter 8 and even lost my other collected LeviHan pictures.
> 
> All thanks to that fucking picture stall and their lousy sales lady assistant and their slow ass computer with virus and low class antivirus and shit and made me lose a quarter or half of my efforts, all the edited chapters were all gone. Good thing I still have my entire copy of this fic.
> 
> I still have hope to re-edit this fic and upload.
> 
> I hope you don't mind this chapter as well too.

**Chapter 3:**

**Never Knew Completeness Like Being Here with You**

**-x-**

 

**-x-**

"Levi!" Hanji screamed his name and knock on his bedroom door. She lunges inside and on him once he opened the door for her, hugging him tightly. It has been a more than a week since they last they did had some fun together, which was also the day she met the new guy. Now that she is back in his arms, Levi was beyond happy to the point his ears would want to clap in unison.

"The hell Shitty Glasses" he smirked even if his tone was a bit irritated but he still can't help feel happy in the inside. He is anxious to kiss her again, sip the every corner of her mouth and lose himself inside her again. She is just a true haven in the flesh sent down for him.

"Well, I guess it's been quite a while that I've been here" she said as her eyes roamed inside of his room but hands still attached on his neck.

"It's only a bit more than a week. Nothing's changed as usual" he blinked down at her. She smiled and pressed her head on his shoulder and neck. "I miss hugging you Levi. I never thought I could miss your hugs" she smelled his usual scent and nuzzled her nose onto his cheek and kiss it. He smelled like he just came out from a shower and his cheek felt soft on her lips; he's like a newly washed stuff toy.

He couldn't move nor respond and all he can do was just hold onto her tightly as he can. His fist balled into her shirt along her waist and scrub his nose and cheek into her hair.

Damn he missed her too, but he can't say it.

All he can do was just to embrace her as much as he can and close his eyes in contentment, feeling that his missing piece in his life is finally back tonight.

"Did you already eat dinner?" She pulls away asked him sheepishly.

He nodded and stared at her for the meantime. He just missed her a lot and can't get his eyes off her now. For the past days, they have treated each other like some serious comrades, discussing what were the important things to be done and be handled for the Corps. Now that they are back to their old familiar treatments to each other, he just can't wait to unleash the beast inside of him and watch her respond like him but be the delicate and affectionate human there is after they have been wild towards each other.

"How about you? Are you hungry?" He snaked his hands around her waist searched her face. She was smiling like the usual and rubbed her nose on his.

"I made sure to have eaten before I went here" she said in a bit tempting voice. So she too, is longing for him as much as he longs for her, he thought. "I need to provide myself with the energy I needed for tonight right?" and she gave him a sweet kiss on the lips as she closed her eyes. He could feel her seriousness and sweetness on that kiss and it only mean one thing, that she is as ready as he is for tonight.

Levi smirked and pulled her tightly to his body to kiss her on the mouth fully like he was deprived on kissing her for years. He played his tongue on her and made sure she too is having her pace on him. Damn he missed those lips and mouth. His hands were tight on her waist as though they fear of having her run away and leave him.

When they pulled away, Hanji was panting really hard compared to Levi. She blushed when she looked at him and stared somewhere else. She can't believe that she missed him this much.

Slowly, she walked pass by towards his bed and removed her hair tie and undid her clothes on her own. She removed her brown jacket and opened her shirt from the top button. Levi slowly made his way towards her and embraced her from the back. She loved how he pressed his body behind her and closed her eye and breathed slowly, relaxed like she was given the time to remove everything away from her mind and just seized the moment. Levi has the amazing gift of doing that to her, making her feel safe and secured, away from any sort of pain or trouble that could find her. She was halted from her actions and placed her arms together with Levi's, feeling the warmth of his body on his sleeves.

They stayed like that for a moment, lost in each other's presence and touch. Levi was somehow hoping that even they don't have words to spare for each other; it was enough for her to understand that he misses her so much beyond his will.

Slowly, as they were still intact with each other, his fingers made its way to open her shirt slowly as it could and felt her chest on his fingertips. Hanji then turned around to look at him and smiled sheepishly at him as she removes all of his clothing on top of him. When she managed to removed everything from the top of him, even his harness, she hugged him earnestly. While she hugs him, he removed completely her shirt from her and breaks her embrace but resumed to hug him right after he removed her shirt and his hands made it way towards her pants, opening and removing them with ease and had itself slip down on her legs. When her underwear was the one left, he cupped her butt cheeks carefully and carried her towards the bed and placed themselves both in the middle as her pants finally made its way down to the floor.

They stared on each other as Levi crawled on top of her. She can't help but smile at him; he looked just so magnificent with his raven hair and mysterious deep eyes. Hers were expressive and somehow, she admired Levi's since it's too mysterious unlike her which is too reflective. She traced the strong and curvy muscular arms of Levi that had her imprisoned below him and had her be owned by Levi.

Levi descended his lips onto hers, giving her a very light kiss at first and then deepened it and allowed him to take full control of her mouth, playing inside with his tongue. He pulls a bit away as he deliberately teases her lips and mouth. His fingers came to caress her face and massage her cheeks softly as she would allow him to as her hands came to lightly massage his groin by the pants then opened it slowly with both of her hands.

When they broke apart, Hanji was breathing fast and panting hard, compared to Levi who still seemed to be relaxed. They stared at each other for a moment then he moved to her chest and bit some part of it harshly, wanting to remind her how her body belongs to him. Her hands travelled to his hair and pats his head carefully as she moaned and tried to adjust her breathing with his pace of kissing her everywhere. She's starting to feel horribly wet and just in time, Levi pulled the remaining of her clothing down, away from her body which was her underwear and tossed it away.

He sucked hard on her now wet entrance and made her become more wet than before. He entered his middle finger inside of her while he was sucking on her real hard. He missed her so much and he was bound to make her feel regretful of leaving him for more than a week and not even having the heart to neither touch him even if they were alone in their office nor sneak a kiss to his lips. He moved his finger and added another inside of her and boy it was driving her to the edge, gripping hard on her pillow, her body wobbling furiously. She was sweating, concentrating on his desirable tortures and had herself panting really hard. She was wobbling and shivering with delight as her hand stumbles on the raven hair of Levi. Not long after, she came hard on him and he stood by his knees to pull his pants down.

Hanji saw what he was doing and abruptly went to push him down and removed his pants on her own, gathering enough energy to do it after losing almost everything and feeling like she was some big jelly on top of Levi.

"You're not wearing an underwear?" she blinked confusingly at him, a bit panting.

"What's the problem with that?" he raises a brow.

She giggled and motioned to whisper into his ear "nothing" and it made his hair on his nape stand up, even his big penis. Hanji kissed his cheek and went down to place small kisses as well on the side of his penis and slowly sucked it, her tongue roaming around and played with as it went inside of her mouth. He was glad that his tortures on her were enough to make her feel like torturing him as well and it was just satisfying and pulling him over the edge. Like always, she too was also prepared to catch him release and swallowed everything. She closed her eyes and tucked her hair on her ear as she sipped every seed of his, making her look desirable as always. Levi was astonished of the view that she was still enjoying sipping every bit of him as he was on her.

She crawled on top of him and stared on each other's eyes seriously, not until she grinned on him like a dope. She leaned closer to him, always loving how he smelled as he sweat hard and whispers into his ear. "I want to be on top first" and she pulls away to search his face for an answer.

He studied her face first then nodded. He's going to need some more pleasurable tortures as well, he figured. She kissed his lips lightly and without breaking their stares, she rode him. She first held on to his now hardened penis and let it enter her as she closes her eyes and gasp in every push, still adjusting as there are still little pains and she would wince every once in a while. Levi find the fact that she always still has a hard time accommodating him inside of her as he would go inside further of her. It was a bit of a challenge, and just enough to make them chuckle for some time.

Once she was settled on top of him and he was good inside of her, she straddled and moved slowly at first then worked it hard. Hanji closed her eyes as she was having fun straddling him and moans on top her lungs and tugs her hand on her hair, loving him inside of her as she moves on top. The feeling was glorious so to say, even if her legs are starting to feel tired and numb because of taking too much time straddling him. His hands made its way on the butt cheeks of Hanji and squeezed it, giving her a reason to continue and don't stop until they are on cloud nine.

Levi enjoyed seeing her lose herself on him as she tugs her hair with her own hands and had her breasts juggle in front of him. The sound that they were making as she pumps on him every time, their skin tapping on each other is also making him feel on the edge. His hands made its way up to her waist from her butt, to the side of her breast then caressed her breast with all his will, pinching her nipples and making it more hardened than before.

Damn he is too blessed to have her. She may be a mad scientist but she sure is also great in bed, hopefully just to him, no one else. It was the very reason why he is always tempted to impregnate her so he can have her only for himself but it was a cruel idea to use a baby as reason for her not to leave him and have her on his own. He did thought about that but came to realize about the truth of his though a bit late. He also realized he wanted Hanji to be for himself because she wanted to, not because she was forced to. He wanted her to want him by her own decisions not by anyone else.

Then there it was.

She was on the edge and she was about to cum and worked on him faster and harder. He knew about that he too was about to cum done but he can't do it inside of her, even if he wanted to because wanting to cum together with her is a new connection that the two of them have shared.

"You can cum inside me Levi, it's alright I swear" and he did, no longer holding back.

They both released on each other and he adjusted enough to catch her as her bones lose its might to maintain her framework of her body. She landed on his arms as he was slightly seated and slowly descended them both.

Whenever she said that it's okay to cum inside her, she really means it. She was too responsible and careful not have an unwanted child all of a sudden and normally, she wanted him to cum inside her, that it was alright because she just had her period and she is free from any sort of worry if ever he would cum inside of her.

He patted her head and adjusted her on his arms. She too then slowly had her arms crept onto Levi and can't stop panting. Levi cradled her and held onto her hair, hand tug on it and his other hand traced her back silently. After they have relaxed on each other's arms, Hanji placed kisses on Levi's body weakly and traced his abs all over his body. He liked what she was doing and when she stopped, he suddenly felt like he wanted to be inside her again.

"You want another round Shitty Glasses?" he whispers faintly onto her ear.

She looked up to him and smiled. She really didn't know what to answer, she feels too tired already but she didn't want to upset Levi and be fair with as always. She looked down disappointedly on his chest and placed her head on his shoulder again and hugged him from there.

"Hey, you okay?" he lifted her face by his fingers and searched her face.

He knew it, he's not stupid. From months of having sex with her almost every week, knowing her and her body, he knew she was already tired. But the disappointment on her face was killing him. He can feel that she in a regretting stage, that she still wanted but most probably she is already tired.

He tugged her again on his chest and held her tighter on his arms and looked up on the ceiling. As long as she is here on his arms, he wouldn't ask for anything anymore.

"You don't have to force yourself you're too tired Hanji." He said absently. He still wants some more but he respected her limits and he never wanted to push her on her limitations ever. As long as she was pleased and had some fun, it's alright for him.

"But it's unfair for your part Levi" She sighed. "I worked on you hard but you didn't even-"

"I swear it's fucking alright" he reassured her, hoping it was reassuring enough for her to hear. He played on her hair silently but she suddenly crawled further on top to look at him straight in the face. He didn't removed his hand on her head and the other went on her waist. He just love the curve on her waist.

"Just let me rest first, then one more round." She smiled at him kissed him on the lips, tugging her hair, joining his hand on her hair and traced his hand with her fingertips. "I can still do more. It's not enough to knock me down yet." He smirked. He just love her.

Wait what?

He was surprised of what he just said inside his head. What the fuck did he just said about her?

Levi thought that what he meant to rest was to close her eyes a little and catch on her breath but Hanji moved to kiss him fully on the mouth, her turn now to play on his tongue and bite his lower lip. He liked it and opened his mouth for some more to be sucked by her. So she meant by kissing him wildly as her way of resting. Even if it may sound weird about her new resting way, he is still down with it.

His hand crept slowly everywhere on her, to her breasts to its sides then down to roam around her waist. After loving the feeling of her waist that perfectly fills his hands, his hands went to her ever glorious ass and massaged her entrance. He inserted a finger or two inside of her again and she gasped that she have to close her eyes in the pure feeling his fingers inside her and just feel it working inside of her, she just love Levi lose himself inside her.

Well, at least she knew that he is losing inside her and hoped she was certain about it.

When Levi felt that she's already too wet again, he flipped them both around and he landed on top of her. She was surprised by his sudden move and giggled. The way she giggles made him lounge on her for a deep longing kiss. He never had an idea that he could survive without her this close, but he swear he didn't want to be separated from her again and not feel her touches.

He kissed her with earnest and slow pace that she moaned underneath their deep long kisses, her legs wrapping itself on his waist. His hands travelled down to her legs and rubbed it with his hands, making her tingle underneath him. She moved her head after their endless kisses, she loved it but she could no longer breathe properly. Levi then instead kisses her cheek, ears, nose down to her neck and bit her from its base. She closed her eyes and wrapped her hands on his head, embracing him, squeezing his head lightly on her chest and his body onto hers.

She loved the warmth that they are sharing that they directly receive from each other's skins. Levi managed to go down further to her breasts and sucked them alternately, kissing and massaging them both. It made Hanji wet herself more and Levi could already feel her quirking body underneath him. He took one deeper kiss from her mouth, made his tongue go wild inside her and she did the same, the sound of their kissing hard made him hard and ready. She looked at him when he pulls away, seeing that she didn't want him to pull away and break the kiss even if she's panting hard and gasping for air.

He leans down to her ear and whispered. "Now it's my turn to work you hard, Squad Leader" and bit her on her right breast, not breaking the stare that they are sharing. She giggled and can't wait for him to be inside her again.

He first held his penis and readied it, inserting it inside of her slowly and lightly as he could, careful not to hurt her. But with all the soreness that she just had, very little pain was felt and not much of a wince was done unlike their first round. He adjusted her legs on his waist looked at her, searching her face, asking her if she was alright and already prepared.

Then she slowly smiled at him.

She gulped hard and nodded, had her hand on his shoulders. He leans down and pins her, adjusting to embrace him as he starts to pump on her. It was slow at first but the speed slowly changed on her desired pace. She would whisper to his ear to go faster and he would, taking her words by heart, promising to fulfill her pleasurable wishes.

She embraced him again and pressed his body hard on her as he is getting intense and quick inside of her. She was panting hard again but kept her promise that they'll stand for another round. The same sound of skin slapping on each other as she moans was just a pleasant music on his ears every night. He can't afford to say it to her but that same music that rings in his ears was not enough to leave him even on day or night, torturing him, making him want more of her presence even if they are working on the field. How he just wished that he could have her presence always with him, always by his side so he would never feel alone.

But he can't.

He can't tell her that. She might find his words absurd and leave him for good and if that'll happen, he would be crushed and be left even more alone. The thought was bothering him and no matter how he pushed and pull inside her, he can't seem to be getting near his cum yet, the lust that he is feeling is starting to go as well.

Hanji felt his body tensed on her embrace and she was surprised of it and opened her eyes. She grew to understand the man, the captain of her body and of her mind, and feel ever so concern about him and his needs- nor his worries. She knew perfectly that he is man full of torn and painful past, a life of despair and it scarred him so bad that it made him an anti-social man and grew up as a man of few words and more of actions. But as he goes inside of her every time they'll make love, she finds herself understanding him even further and learning more about him and his total self, being more transparent to her than what she actually could have imagined.

They trusted each other in their field of work before but even more than they could have anticipated in just a few months of starting to be sexual over each other, and learned to understand each other in a different way. He tried to be softer on her as she tried to widen her acknowledgements on him despite his never changing harsh words and heavy actions.

And at this very moment, she could perfectly feel him trembling, troubled on her arms, wondering if her embrace was not enough to take him away from his nightmares even just for one night. She is a failure if that was the case then.

"Levi, are you alright?" she asked.

She was starting to see how his expression is changing, different than their usual love making. He doesn't looked arouse and he even looked bothered and worried over something and as the way he moves inside of her, she could feel that he _is_ definitely not even nearing his peak.

He looked up to her and blinked unsteadily and knew that she is already coming to understand of what is happening. Hanji pulled him closer to her, embracing him tighter and caressed him, cradled him like some baby who can't sleep at night. "It's okay Levi, it's alright. You don't need to finish if you don't want to." She said warmly, cupping his face with both her hands. She tried to smile and Levi tried finish what he started, gripping on her waist tighter, moving faster on her as she watched him carefully by the top of his head as she tried to caress his arms by her fingertips.

He started to kiss her on her cheek and caress her breast, licking her neck and biting her there again. But it was no use. The thought that he just unable to make finish and that he started lose the feeling of lust that he has and be replaced by troubled thoughts. He still tried to move around her but it was not good enough, he is losing it and he could perfectly see Hanji's expression turning worried towards him.

"Fuck!" he stopped and looked away, can't meet her in the eyes, pulls put and rolled to the other side of the bed. He turned his back from her, ashamed of the fact that he had showed very low performance of mating with her tonight.

Hanji looked at him worriedly and slowly crept her arms on his waist. She pressed her body even tighter against his back and tried to calm herself down with him. Levi then acknowledged her efforts of comfort towards him and placed his hands on hers.

He was disappointed on his self and he didn't really liked what had happened.

Hanji's nose travelled just below his ears and side of his neck, carefully tracing it. She didn't said anything though she really was tempted so she could comfort him and assure him that it really was okay because it seemed like he won't be able to calm himself down for the mean due to what had happened.

He decided to break the silence and said "sorry, Shitty Glasses" and shut his eyes tightly. He pulled her closer on his back and tightened his hold on her. He didn't want her to go because of disappointment. Levi rarely and never had performed poorly in their casual sexy times but when he reflected on to the reasons of what had lead him to do such failing act, he couldn't act it nor admit it to himself the least.

He suddenly lost it when he told himself that he couldn't leave without her and her touches and thought of other guys mating with her. It's been a serious blow on his mind and heart and will rip him alive. He couldn't talk it over to her when he too is confused to accept his words.

"It's okay Levi." Hanji replied and wanted to tell it straight in his face so he would know that she really means it.

"So you mean I was not always great enough to make you cum everytime we'll do this?"

"No I mean, you're really, really good but there are very, very few instances that I didn't cum and it's not your fault. " Hanji blushed but tightened her grip on his. "Maybe I was just too tired or something but the point is, it's okay and you didn't get mad at me during those times that I am having difficulty reaching my limit you know?"

Levi thought about it but didn't exactly remembered when that actually happened. If he was aware, he wouldn't get mad, she's right but he will surely be a bit worried if he knew. Pushing her to cum with him is not his thing, he is never too fond of pushing her into something she is not comfortable of or she can't do.

Levi groaned and then turned around to meet her gaze. He flushed by his failure but the smile that Hanji gave him told him to kiss her instead.

And he did.

He cupped her face and slowly brought her lips to his, his tongue carefully meeting hers inside and then moved cautiously inside as he suck her then moved it with his again. She pulled a bit to catch her breath and had her hand move along the side of Levi's face and travel along his hair when it went up to his head.

He changed his position and slowly went up on top of her, not breaking the kiss. Hanji moaned and arched her back a bit. Levi should be aware that he is such a big turn on for a woman like her, she thought. He then moved to place kisses on her face down to her neck but didn't lasted long and has to kiss her again on the mouth.

Hanji seemed to feel nearing death due to suffocation, Levi was just into kissing her like mad tonight and she really can no longer catch her breath. She slowly pulled Levi's face a bit farther from hers and looked at him a bit intense and in wonder.

She looked at him and she could tell that he was ashamed when he looked away and had to reach for his face again to focus on looking for her face. "Levi look at me. It's not bad, it's alright. You're acting like a total kid."

He looked at her and smirked.

"Oh really? But when I do this, I'm still a kid?" he slightly entered his penis inside her and devilishly smiled at her. She squeak suddenly and then returned the same kind of smile at him, eyes laughing at his teasing.

She just laughed and then closed her eyes, she could feel that she wanted to sleep for a while. She sighed and Levi descended his head onto her shoulder as she hears him breathing by her ears. He didn't pulled his penis out of her as she lock him in a tight embrace.

Hanji played her fingers onto his hair to somehow helped him feel better and calm the hell down, while the other traced his bare back up and down and whispers to his ears. "You're always the man for me Levi in almost every single thing" and she finally doze off, eyes shutting down, breathe steadying.

Levi tensed and slowly brought his eyes towards her. She didn't know that her words were just comforting and… touching. It's like she meant her words for a different level, but he knew perfectly that she is not into relationship like he does, that they're just enough into this kind of thing between them, even though a part of him wanted more. Her words were too touching that it pinched his heart a little, that he felt the seriousness behind it.

He smiled genuinely at her even if she's already sleeping. He kissed her neckline gently and bit, leaving a mark for tonight's memory. He always does that, so that he whenever he will see it, he would be reminded about their latest night. She is not aware of it but in the inside, he always yearn for leaving one at her always. He kissed the mark that he left and kissed her lightly on the cheek so she won't wake up.

 _"You've always been the only woman for me too, Shitty Glasses."_ He thought and can't help not to smile and hoping that he could have the balls to say it to her but he suck in conveying his thoughts through words, he didn't know why but he believes that if he tells it, it's the same as letting them go. He would lose them and it would left him broken. He would prefer action and its powerful effects and would left the person to deal of the true meaning he wanted to speak of.

He felt sleep has started to daunt on him now and as he thought about it, he _is_ indeed starting to feel differently towards her. Thinking about the times that they had spent together and just as to how she makes him feel different, that he feels loved and taken care of, like how much he feels like he finally has a home made him realize what he is missing all of a sudden. The arrival of Georges Bellicoffe made him realized a few more thing- that he is a threat of losing Hanji to him, and there would be no way in hell for him to allow that.

He didn't moved away but slept on top of Hanji, too tired to even move away and sleep on his own space while the smile never leaving his face without her knowing.

**-x-**

Levi woke up without Hanji under him and wondered how she was able to get out. He actually wanted to wake up and see how she would react if she saw that he is still inside her as they wake up by the morning but she isn't there. They were not used cuddling with each other every after time they spent on each other every after sex and would often freak out a bit in surprised if they see each other spooning in each other's arms.

He shook his head a bit, ruffled his hair and put on his clothes. He washed his face and headed for the headquarters' cafeteria, hoping Hanji would already be there.

Once he set foot towards the cafeteria and join the others for some warm breakfast, most of the people were already greeting him good mornings. He nodded in every greeting and dismissed them but wanted to hear a certain greeting from.

When he was able to spot her, his eye suddenly twitched in disgust, definitely not a good thing to see in the very morning.

Hange Zoe talking to that new transferred recruit man Georges Bellicoffe. Apparently, she was already eating her breakfast with him and she had been laughing for the past five seconds. She would usually wait for him for breakfast or pick up his breakfast for him but it doesn't look she did neither of those for today.

She suddenly laughed and pushed her glasses way back to the bridge of her nose. He could swear that that guy is _flirting_ with her, by the way he smiled and smoothened his hair and look at her like some kind of prince, he wanted to chop him to pieces and serve him as a titan's delicious dinner.

"Good morning Heichou!" it was the loud cheery voice of Petra with Olou, food on their hands and nodded as they greeted him with delight. "Are you alright? You've been staring there for quite some time now." Olou asked with a voice a bit of mockery.

He glared at them then had his eyes turn to see Hanji and Georges Bellicoffe, who are now both looking at him with questioning and surprised looks, hearing Olou and Petra's greetings at him.

"I'm alright." He didn't know why but he felt his blood drained out of him all suddenly and passed by the two, eyes down on the floor as he walked while the looked with concern.

He didn't eyed Hanji or even the Georges guy, but knew that they are definitely eating and talking, but could swear that a pair of eyes is staring right at him, he could feel it.

He took a plate of eggs and some bread and a glass of water from the distributing recruit and turned to look for a table to eat. He tried his best to ignore the woman who he had just trouble having sex with last night but he can't, it's like she's unaware that she is hypnotizing him.

To his surprise, she suddenly waved her hand rigorously and started calling for his attention. "Levi! Come sit with us!" she was grinning hard, lips reaching at the ends of her ears, eyes sparkling with delight.

He sighed and kept his expression blank but in the inside, he is already deadening. He can't seem to bring himself to eat with Hanji with some wanna-be-cool-soldier along the table. He didn't want to refuse Hanji's offer and he wanted a word with her after eating and at the same time, probably know more about the new guy.

He made his way towards the table of the two, heart sand and feet heavy with regret while the smile of Hanji at him made him want to melt at the very moment. He took a seat beside her so he could touch her knee or feel her thighs while he planned to give out icy glares at the new guy.

"Good morning Levi!" she squealed in delight.

"You look way too happy for this morning, Shitty Glasses." He groaned and took a sit as he raised a brown towards Georges. "And what seems to be the conversation you're having together?" he choked on the last word, it's irritating him beyond limits.

"Good morning Heichou!" the young man started. "Squad Leader Hanji was a really great person to talk with" he smiled at her and Hanji blushed, looking at her plate. "We're talking about how science can help us unfold the mysteries around titans."

Levi started eating on his food and gulped hard a few water from his glass. Her most favorite subject that he could not relate with but this guy can, she can absolutely have fun talking with her favorite thing and this guy doesn't seem to mind it at all.

He continued eating without even looking at Georges and as though he didn't heard what he had just said. The young man blinked abruptly but Hanji decided to help him out.

"Levi is a man of few words Georges, you'll get used to him." She gave Levi a small shake in the shoulders as he continued to munch on his eggs. "I see." Georges smiled a bit and finished his plate.

Georges felt a bit awkward looking at Levi and felt weird so he decided to finish his plate quickly and head on. "I better go, Squad Leader. It's really nice to have breakfast with you." He smiled as he stood up and Levi and Hanji eyes went to look at him. To the both of their surprise, he took her free left hand and kissed it. "Let's do it again next time, Squad Leader." His stare on her as he kissed her hand made her flush really red and her right hand quickly grasped by Levi's knee.

Levi's eye twitched again and stopped spearing with his fork and munching his food. He saw how Georges kissed her hand and how she reacted, stone on her sit and blood rushing on her face.

"ah, yeah" hanji struggled to say it, she never felt so sweetly treated as woman and it felt so tantalizing, she never knew that it felt that good despite it being a small gesture.

When Georges went away, much to Levi's relief, Hanji stared on her plate and bit her lip hard so she would be able to contain her nervous laugh. Her tensed feeling was suddenly stopped once Levi suddenly spoke.

"Does he really need to do that?" he eyed her carefully, and the thorn on his chest is still in there. Damn, he really didn't want it to be there and was too confused to understand why it was there in the first place, burdening his heart.

"It's a sign of respect and appreciation Levi. Men from long time ago does that, and it's a really, rare, rare trait that a man could have nowadays." She mumbled and munch on her food, Levi still eyeing her. "I was not even aware that such trait could still be fully observed by some man."

"So you consider him as a gentleman?" he asked her and took the last bite of his food, forcing it down his throat since Hanji's words is giving him less energy to eat.

She smiled, a smile that she rarely gives him to see. It's genuine and sincere, and this time, it's because of different and new recent reason why. "yeah, he is" she said, not looking at him and only to her plate. She smiled again and this time she looked at him. A question suddenly came passed by his head, _have I ever made her smile like that?_

He snorted, wiped his mouth and came to pick her plate and his. "He's an asshole" he said bluntly and stood up. Hanji looked at him with disbelief and giggled.

"Still a gentleman, that is." She stood up and took linked arms with him, happy to hear her giggles by his ears again. "Don't give him such a hard time Levi. I'm sure you'll be fond of him soon."

Levi didn't pulled his arm away but did snorted on her remark. She has no idea how much he won't be fond of someone who flirts with her.

**-x-**

Well, I am happy I managed to edit this chapter and a few more so yeah.


	4. I Can Smell Your Scent for Miles

**Chapter 4:**

**I Can Smell Your Scent for Miles**

**-x-**

A few days passed and Levi was able to observe how Georges still flirted around Hanji almost all of the time and to top it all, as much as he wanted to have him on his squad to give him his proper ‘welcome’ but unfortunately, Erwin had him suddenly transferred to Mike’s squad. Still, at least not to Hanji’s squad.

Levi thought that Georges won’t be able to get pass through Mike’s weird smelling welcome initiation test, Nanaba’s annoying blank stares, Gelgar’s annoying glares, Henning’s farting madness (and Mike actually loved that to have a different smell around the squad), and Lynne’s short tempers. To Levi’s dismay, he was able to befriend everyone in Mike’s squad in just weeks and to make it worse, he was already having the guts to ask to his new ‘squad’ about Hanji, trying to know more about her.

It was Nanaba who thought of sharing the news to Levi in one fine afternoon where the main and major members of each squads are to be checked by Erwin monthly, to be given check-ups and examinations and some feedback regarding their recent mission with their squads, activities and recent posts, some kind of general assembly for each squad.

Levi was eyeing Hanji from afar who was busy talking with Mike when Nanaba crept behind Levi and talked.

“Georges has been a great in the squad for a very short time, I assume you already know him?” Nanaba quietly whispers to his ear.

Levi turned his head a bit to look at her. “What makes you think I care?” he asked, words coming out like sour. He doesn’t want anything more to hear about that gentleman asshole that came up so suddenly to their league and intriguing their lives, since Mike was too eager to tell share to him about Georges improvements in his squad and it’s already deafening him. He was just too eager to know too when Mike then wonders out loud at him telling him that “that kid sure has some taste for an intelligent woman like Hanji. He’s been asking all about her every hour and I wonder why what it was in her that made him go crazy about her.” Once he heard that, he wanted to hear this guy’s bones crashed under his foot. Now that Nanaba is starting to open Georges as a topic for a conversation, he wanted to pass it out.

“Because what I have to tell you is about Georges and Hanji.” He was suddenly taken aback by what she just said. “You should just admit it first to yourself Levi, I know how you fancy Hanji in a whole lot of different level.”

Levi’s eyes narrowed at her while he can feel his hands becoming sweaty all of a sudden, feeling deaden of whatever possibility that she might knew about him and Hanji’s night affairs that has been going on for months without surely anyone knowing about it except him and her and there’s no way for Nanaba to know about it, even if she might be the closest female to Hanji.

“What the fuck are you talking about?” he didn’t mean to sound harsh but he hoped it was enough to drive her away and stop asking further question about him and Hanji.

Nanaba smiled and came closer to his side, making sure that no one is around and that no one would be able to hear them.

“You know Levi,” she started, breathing deeply as she said his name, “Mike recently has been telling me that he was actually wondering why you and Hanji have a very different scent before, and then recently, he kept on budging me that you two just had mixed scent over each other’s body now.” Nanaba started to raise a brow and looked more closely at Levi, making him hide his blush and look away from her. “So what do you think happened? Before you two just had way different scents and now, you two practically share the very same, almost like a mixture of your scents. Mike even tells me it takes a lot hours, days even to share the very same scent. Mind telling me why Levi?”

Levi snorted at her. “Don’t bring me and Hanji up with Mike’s weirdness and his smelling obsession, Nanaba.”

“But how are you going to explain Mike’s question to me then?”

Levi glared at her but she continued to grin at him back. “He doesn’t know Levi, nor even had an idea why. I am asking this to you personally, and Mike doesn’t have any idea that I am asking this to you.” She held out a hand and placed it on his shoulder, giving it a light squeeze, reassuring him that it was only her who knows of such thing about him and Hanji. “No else knows, and Hanji was too hard headed to even tell it to me. And don’t give me that look! I’m not stupid like the others. The way you smirk always at her when everyone else has their backs on you two, and the way she searches for your hand and hold it until each meeting ends, it doesn’t speak the simple ways of two comrades Levi.”

“So you did asked her already?” he asked surprised, as though her suspicions were not heard at all.

“Yeah I did. She would tend to blush but give me no answer to it, telling me that you are just a comrade to her, nothing else.”

She said that? He thought, so he was just still a comrade to her as well, as if he was expecting a different thing from her. With their numerous love making and time together, knowing each other than nobody else does, she still feels the same with him? Just a fucking friend? A comrade? Not even close for being a lover or some shit?

“She did say you fancy someone else so I stopped asking her but I was actually expecting a different answer from you.” She explained.

“I fancy someone she said? Like who?” he was beginning to feel curious now. So they were talking about him, about them, behind his back?

“She said you fancy Petra.” Nanaba is now feeling anxious, her question is still left unanswered and their conversation is now going away from her question.

Levi wanted to strangle Hanji, maybe that’s why she was blocking her probable feelings for him. “Sorry to break it up to her but no.”

“But why did she said such a thing?” she removed her hand on his shoulder and

“That I don’t know, Nanaba.”

“And about Mike’s scent observation?”

Levi started to walk away, but looked back at her again and said “we share the same perfume.” He smirked to himself once he continued on his way, knowing that Nanaba won’t even believe what he had just answered. Nanaba scratched her a little, wondering if Levi just joked on her, whom she highly doubts since Levi has never pulled a joke on anyone.

Seeing that Hanji was still busy talking with Mike, which he thinks that Mike must have probably be asking her questions as well, most particularly in relation with that guy Georges. He gritted his teeth, and passed by Erwin who was just to make one final announcement before letting all of them go.

Everyone stood quiet and let him spoke.

“Since this took a day long, I would like to ask you to write a you and your squads performance recently in regards with our latest mission and the next one on the way. Include any of your recommendations and anything you wanted to say. Since all you are one of the longest remaining members per squad, I expect for all you to comply and know what to write. I’ll be accepting your papers until tomorrow.” He smiled and saluted.

Levi saw Hanji waved goodbye at Mike and he knew perfectly that she will immediately write that paper and finish it off.

His lips turned upward before going to his room and finish the fuck out of that paper in just less than an hour.

 

**-x-**

Hanji was smiling as she holds her quill tightly along her hand and write a two paged paper that Erwin was asking for. Since the checking for leaders and members who had been staying in the Corps for a long has only been being done once a year, Hanji thought of making a big thing out of it and write with all her heart about her squad and her point of view regarding the previous mission and the next one to come.

She was just about to finish one last paragraph when Levi suddenly came inside her room without even a knock. Hanji was surprised but came to continue what she was doing.

“Not even a smile for me this time, shitty glasses?”

Hanji looked at him with eyes in surprise and blinked furiously before answering him back. “Oh, hey Levi.” She smiled at him since he looks like he was waiting for an answer from his question and gave her his notable smirk, making Hanji blushes uncontrollably and hid it as she worked on her paper. She hated that smirk of his, making him look arrogantly cute.

Levi sat on her bed, making himself comfortable on top of her bed, leaving a space in between his legs and curled down a little to it, hands clasped together and watched her carefully as she finished her paper. “It doesn’t need to be a novel Hanji.” He started, he in fact is starting to feel anxious inside. He just can’t wait to touch her by her waist and rub his cheek onto her hair, give her a squeeze and kiss her cheek. It’s been days since the last time they held each other too close and felt each other’s warmth.

“Hang on a sec Levi, I’m almost done here. Are you done with yours? Erwin will be needing this tomorrow so I -----“

“I finished it right after.” Hanji raised her head to look at him and he smiled back at her. She blushed again after hearing his words, knowing that he wanted to have a moment again with her tonight since he finished a task in very short time.

“Oh” she mumbles and looked down on her paper again. “I didn’t expect that” she replied.

Levi snorted. “Why not?”

“Because you hate writing papers and sometimes, you just tell it yourself to Erwin and not write anymore.” She was careful not to look at him again because she knew that he would be giving her that smirk of his, which she really adored because it is not often that she sees Levi smile and that it really looked so cute at him and can’t help but blush.

“I have some plans tonight so I wanted it to finish. And he needs that paper so I finished it right away.” His replied with voice blank, no excitement but in truth, she know what he meant that he has some _plans_ tonight. She is not sure if she can be pretty great tonight with him after not doing it nor sneaking a kiss on him for days, almost two weeks to be exact and she is feeling rather nervous about it.

Thinking about it, Hanji felt a bit saddened about how Levi couldn’t feel a bit happy or satisfied or excited of some sort when he was about to fuck around with her, it’s like he was just using her body to let out his inner man hormones and shit and succumb into her body. It was not rightly called love making anymore and somehow, she doesn’t know how much more she can handle such a thing with him and it’s driving her crazy. As much as she gets confused, she still feels that she didn’t want to stop. From everything that they have shared that had made them even more attached to each other, including this sexual affair that seems too casual for them already where they didn’t even promised to be in a ‘romantic relationship’, just this kind of activity if needed and nothing else, she felt that she can’t bear to give it all up just yet.

In truth, she longs for Levi’s skin on hers, his embrace of security, his warm lips on hers, his lustful tongue, and his delicious kisses that she know that no man could ever give to her like he does. He was the very first man to go and cum inside of her, and it’s a very unforgettable thing for her.

“Hey Shitty Glasses, you okay?” he asked her worriedly.

She was too drowned into her thoughts that she was not aware that she was already finished with her paper. She let out a nervous laugh at him. “I’m fine Levi. Just, too preoccupied with this one I guess.” She grinned at him and he reciprocates it. She was surprised at first and felt like blushing again so she looked at her paper to hide such bashful act.

“Are you done?” he asked his voice low and mighty like usual.

“Ahm yeah” she said wobbly.

They locked on each other’s stare and Hanji could feel the earth shaking under her feet. “Let me see it.” he stretched out his hand and Hanji was again surprised of his interest on her paper. Somehow, she felt delighted about his sudden attitude of interest.

“Sure!” She merrily walked towards him but to her astonishment when she was stretching her papers to Levi, he pulled her forearm and she landed safely onto his lap. She was about to let out a word when she found her face a few inches closer to Levi’s and felt his hand cautiously crawling on her rib, tucking her properly on his lap and fixed her legs as it dangles freely on top of his lap too by his other leg. His hand caressed the lower portion of her waist and pressed her closer to his strong muscular body.

“Now let me see that so I may know what took you so long for a fucking paper.” He shouldn’t be asking such a thing of what took her quite long since he knew that she always pour her very best in everything that she does, even if it takes time.

“Levi...” she mumbled his name, so soft that it made his left hand clung by her butt and his right hand tighten its grip on the paper so he won’t lose control easily to his urges.

“This is shit Hanji. You were still happy about last time’s mission where we just did nothing but look for more food for our people and killed a dozen of titans and loose some of our soldiers in the process” he tells her, nose hitting her cheek.

“Well, Moblit helped me captured a five meter and I was beyond happy about it! Though we failed and it ended up dying again, wrong steps again.” she sighed and decided to tangle her arms on his neck, bringing her closer and even leaner to his chest. As she pulled herself closer to him even if there’s no more room to get closer to his body, she managed to look at him straight in the eyes, hers captivating as ever. She felt like a baby being cradled carefully, and the feeling was ecstatic.

“I can do better than him and capture even a bigger titan for you that is alive, you Shitty Four Eyes.”

“Oh yeah! You we---“

“And what’s this? You’re excited to see on how our newly transferred recruits can perform their skills in the following mission outside? Don’t tell me you’re starting to fancy that Georges guy?” he wanted to slit his own throat. He didn’t want to ask it directly but his mouth betrayed him all of a sudden.

From looking at his eyes, she looked down shyly into her legs dangling by his lap and loosen a bit of her arms around his neck, papers finally being settled at her bed. “Not really,” she started. “But he is a really interesting guy.”

Levi suddenly felt his heart stopped a beat. He can’t possibly hearing it right. “Why is that? I’m interesting as well” he raised a brow as he raised his voice a bit.

“Yeah but he is different. He is.... very gentleman and I have never felt so respected as a woman before,” she looked at him to see if he is still listening and he is, looking at her , now hand holding her head “until he came. He enjoyed science and didn’t seemed to get bored as I tell him about the mysteries about titans and he just seemed very, very sweet. He was even eager telling me his plans and views about the possibility of expanding our technology, just only if our government would approve. He was really something Levi.” she finished and locked eyes with him for confirmation if he agrees to her words or not regarding that guy.

Levi didn’t changed his expression but does felt a slash passed by his heart, his inside turning downwards, it just felt pretty horrible. Hanji saw how his eyes turned away on the other side of the room which looked like despair and felt how his grip became slightly loosen. “oh” the only word that came out from his mouth and then he pressed his head by her neckline. He didn’t want to elaborate anymore, that was enough because if he does asked more, he might dash off and break his neck and tell everyone it was an accident.

Somehow, she felt contentment and ease having his head placed pressed by the end of her neck and her chest. She tucked his head closer to her chest, feeling his deep fast breathing along their thin shirts.

She slowly combed and played his hair by her fingers and he turned to look up to her as he placed light kisses on her shirt. He kissed it slowly and didn’t break the stare that Hanji can’t help but wonder what he was doing. But whatever it is that he is doing, she didn’t want him to stop. It was comforting and just plain pleasurable and felt nice.

She smiled at him, the look that he gives and the very slow and light kisses that he gives her chest was just excruciatingly gratifying. “Levi” she asked as she traced his jawline and he closed his eyes in contentment. “What are you doing?” she asked, a bit laughing.

He didn’t gave her answer but still continued to place kisses on her chest, not even breaking the stare that he is giving her. Instead of answering her, he tucked her even more to his lap, pressing her closer as though he wanted to crash her bones. His hand crept cautiously by her rib while his other remaining hand tucked on her hair.

Even if she was confused about his actions, she could swear that she feels that he is longing for her and this time, it’s different. She hoped that he doesn’t, and if ever he is, then she hoped that it was just his usual lustful yearnings for her, a yearning they have agreed that would remind them that they are still alive and still have each other.

He is aware of the torture that he is giving her, the confusion within those luscious eyes of hers and the flush of pink that suddenly crept within her cheeks. She looks cute, but is she also aware of the torture that she is giving him? Just a fair fight, he thought. She tortures him with words, and he tortures her with actions. Her heartbeat is also making it clear, pumping hard as he feel her pulse by her wrist.

She suddenly felt his lips touching her chest’s skin making her gasp. She was totally not aware that he was already making his way to open her shirt by his mouth, that he was not just kissing her through her shirt. It was too warm for her cold skin and she wanted to feel that warmth on her own lips. He gently pushes her shirt a bit open and far from each other and gently devoured her, kissing her slowly like before, not breaking the stares to each other. She managed to have her other hand travel along his chest, feeling its muscularity.

It only changed when he closed his eyes and sucked right in the middle of her breast, he bit her a bit hard and she held tighter on his hair. She too closes her eyes and let him do his magic on her body, as he gently nibbles on her breast part.

He heard her moan and felt her hand pushed his head deeper on her chest, urging him not to stop on what he is doing to her but he did stop. When he just did, he left her shirt a bit open and he saw how her eyes opened slowly in surprise as though asking him why he suddenly stopped. When her hand caressed his cheek, not breaking the stare, he placed one last kiss on the very red mark that he just placed on her, as if he is saying sorry for the mark that he just gave her.

She embraced him, covering his head and neck with her arms, embracing him with all her might. She didn’t not know when to let go, but she didn’t want to, him being there, as she held him close to her beating heart was something she did not want to end but all beautiful things are bound to end so she slowly let go of him.

He placed his forehead by her cheek, and had his nose replaced and caressed those olive skinned cheeks of hers. They stayed like that for a moment, feeling each other as much as they can, as though they were held prisoners in each other’s embrace. Hanji closes her eyes slowly but didn’t let go of him and when he felt like she was about to let go of him entirely, he saw her dreamy eyes already closed and her breathing becoming even.

“You brushed your teeth already Sleepy Glasses?”

She smiled at the sudden change of nickname and whispers “yeah” by his ears.

He smirked and removed her boots as she hangs on by his neck and placed the papers that was beside him to her bedside table. He carried her and lovingly placed her in her bed, removing her high ponytail and her eye glasses. He moved to her door to lock it and to her much more of her surprise, he joined her on her bed and removed his boots and placed it beside hers.

She didn’t asked nor struggled to tell him that she was too tired and didn’t want to do anything else when he blew the candle off, and tucked her head on his warm embrace, not letting go of her. “Good night then, Shitty four eyes” and he brushed his lips on her cheek.

She smiled and rolled to place her head on his chest as his hand traveled to her waist pulling her closer to him. This has been really all new to her since they only have been affectionate and intimate when having sex, even if they are spending in each other’s room but tonight, he really surprised her and confused her at the same time. She shrugged the thought off her and thought that he might just be in the mood to play or confuse her mind. No matter, this is Levi always a bit weird as her and mind boggling as well too. She just allowed him to do that since he looked like he needs and if that’s what he wanted, then she doesn’t mind at all and they are still on their terms anyway.

She places a kiss on his neck and he smirked and tucked her head deeper to the crook of his neck. Once she was settled on his chest, she can hear his heart beating with joy and her smile grew. She whispers him good night but it seemed like he was the first one to doze off.

 

**-x-**

 I feel so sad. It's #UFCManila and I can't watch it live. No one among my guy friends wanted to watch it live. I feel so horribly sad. :(((( :'( I'm missing all the fun and excitement :'(

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> recchinon OMG! You don't have any idea how much I love your 'Not A First Kiss' and going gaga over it! It's a real pleasure to have you read my work and like it too T.T I feel so happy! T.T
> 
> -x-
> 
> ladyinblack


	5. If I Should Die This Very Moment, I Wouldn't Fear

**Chapter 5:**

**If I should die this very moment, I wouldn't fear**  
  


**-x-**

Levi was relieved for the following days that Hanji has been giving him her casual grins and smiles, most especially that she is now back to giving him sneak kisses on his cheek. She hopes she doesn’t mind but she is the type of woman who is fond of being clingy with other guys as well and hoped that his sort of ‘advanced’ actions won’t mind her at all but hoped that it will reach her out that he is more than interested of her as well. With that though he if finally sure about one thing--- that he will try to take their relationship into a more higher level than just fucking each other-friend-comrades and be ‘lovers’ as they could be called. He too is not stupid to understand that he has a rival on the loose as well and won’t let himself down and lose to him.

The day of their mission outside the walls, also to see whether the newly transferred recruits could actually perform well with them if they are to go outside and explore for a very few days had finally came.

Hanji was prepping her horse and trying to double check her things with her when Levi suddenly called out to her and pulled her into a very tight hug, causing Hanji to squirm from his tight grip. He never knew that he would find himself in a competition with someone else for her attention, though he knew that there won’t be any chance that she will never get too attentive with him but he has an eerie feeling that he needed her attention for himself and that as always, he never got too fond of seeing her being all too cuddly with other man, most especially if it goes with the name of Georges.

Unfortunately, he can’t tell her. He can’t find the energy to tell her... he might be wanting more of her, that he doesn’t see her just a comrade nor a sexual partner but something else, something bigger. He is afraid that if he tells her of the possible feelings that he too is confused about, she might shut him off and stop all the things that they were already having, and he didn’t want that to happen.

In the other note, he didn’t want to lose her to some new bastard in the Recon Corps and would just watch them love each other by the side.

“L-e-Leevi, we’re outside!?” she whispers to him as he bends her and hug her tight.

His hand crawled by her waist and the other by her hair so she won’t go anywhere despite her efforts of pushing him away. “Just promise me that you won’t be too stupid outside and get back here alive” his breathing was even and she felt his fingers moved, caressing her hair softly.

She was surprised of his sudden bold move, good thing they were the only ones inside the stable with the horses. He moved to look her a bit as she lay by his arm under her waist. She searched his face and she could see how serious his stare was, not too hard but soft and securing. She felt his breath over her lips, and she suddenly felt like kissing him on the lips. “You hear me, Shitty Glasses?” he glared at her.

In the inside, she’s panicking. She had always been the one to be sneaky clingy to him and had never thought of him doing such a thing to her. Instead of showing her nervousness, she decided to play with his game.

She threw her arms over his neck and pressed herself closer to him. She leans in to his face, her nose touching his. She looked deep straight to his grey eyes as she smiled at him, the nervousness suddenly going away, being changed by a longing feeling that she has for him.

“Of course Heichou. I will, for you.” Her voice was low and seductive and with her last word, she gave his lips a massage of her own. He leans in and closed his eyes, not regretting of his first attempt of being sneaky with her.

When they both opened their eyes, he smirked and turned his head from right to left. “Not just for me, but for the entire humanity. Without you and your researches, we are fighting for nothing at all.”

Hanji can’t help but grin at his words, no one has ever mentioned that to her, that she was a valuable major for the Corps.

“Well, you are more valuable than me. Without you, more people will die” she whispers to his ear and he closes his eyes as she whispers it to him. “so be careful” she leans again to give him a full mouthed kiss and he returns it with ease, his tongue going inside of her mouth, pushing her tongue and caressing it as his hands tightened along her waist and her. They parted and slightly out of air, but they didn’t care. He glued his forehead on hers and she let out a chuckle. “or you won’t have any hot, steamy sex if you got yourself hurt, Captain” she pulled him for a last deep kiss, sighed on his lips and both had eyes till closed in contentment.

“You got it, Squad Leader.” Tilting his head before leaning closer his face to hers, he gave her lips a quick peck and gathered his energy together to let go of her perfectly fitted waist on his hand.

He assisted her as she climbs her horse. When he was about to watch her go first, she lowered her head to his, grabbed his chin and raise it to meet his gaze at first. He raised a brow and had his face turned rather questioning her of what she was doing but instead, she gave him a huge teeth-full smile and captured his lips, her fingers caressing his chin.

He was the on to turn into bright red as his lips were a bit pouted from the kiss that she just gave him. “I’ll be seeing you soon, captain.” And then she dashed off with her horse.

All he can do was watch her leave and find himself smiling crazy to himself.

 

­ **-x-**

Hanji was too preoccupied with the thoughts of what had happened earlier with Levi at the stables. She was too overwhelmed of him his actions and how she had reacted as well.

They passed by the first village and she found her fingers still lingering her swollen lips and found herself smiling to herself. He doesn’t usually do such a thing for her outside his or her room, most especially that there is a possibility that someone could just barge in and interrupt their personal time being.

She was blushing when Georges suddenly came flying with his gear, killing the first three titans that doesn’t differ much in height that made him had an easy killing angle. Hanji was suddenly delighted to witness how great he actually was, that he can actually have a titan killing spree on his own too.

When they reached finally their camp and rest for the moment and plan for the next directions and instructions, Hanji, like she usually does, had time to explore the forest on her own, her squad not just far around the forest she is searching for. She’s looking for plants, animals or insects of different breeds and would want to study them too, which she finds interesting and might sooner or later be of help for the humanity. She was squatting over some plants and observing over some its leaves and composition.

“Squad Leader Hanji!” Hanji turned around on her heels, standing straight and looked towards the direction of the voice. Her worried expression suddenly changed when she saw Georges running towards her.

He came panting right in front of her and she ruffled his hair as he bents down, clutching on his knees for support. “What are you doing here Georges?” she asked in disbelief. She always find herself alone, lurking in the forest when they come to rest for camp in the middle of their mission since no one else has the same thing of interest to share with her.

He smiled and straightened his form and grinned at her. “I would like to explore the forest with you, Squad Leader.”

Hanji’s smile grew. “Are you sure?”

“Absolutely Squad Leader!” Georges grabbed her hand and intertwined his fingers with her and she looked at disbelief. An odd and eerie feeling suddenly rushed through her as he held her hand and walked around, looking for creatures and plants that are yet needed to be furthered studied. To remove the shuddered sudden feeling that passed her, she plastered a smile on her face instead and continued to bend over plants and write notes on her mini notebook.

“Aren’t you supposed to be with your squad, Georges?” she asked, remembering Mike.

Georges gave her hand a squeeze and grinned at her. “Nope, I’ve told them I’ll go with you.”

Hanji’s eyes widened. “You told them that?” she was really surprised about his reason of going away from his squad. “Aren’t they going to be mad?”

“I doubt that. If they needed me, they should have told me to stick around but they didn’t so I guess it’s fine.”

Hanji smiled and pulled him into another direction. “Then, a lot of things await us, Georges.”

He bowed down and gave her hand a kiss. “Yes, my lady” He didn’t not remove his eyes at her when he kissed her hand, making her blush and look away.

Georges assisted her and watched around to inform her if there are any titans about to come, and she cannot deny that he is such a great help for her too. It was really fascinating to see that he too share the same interest that she knew no one does and even calls her a lunatic because of it but with Georges, she felt like a normal person.

“Squad Leader! Commander Erwin said we have to go and he is already asking about you!” Moblit shouted, running to her direction. When she saw him running towards them, she quickly gave Georges a small sad smile, telling him that they are about to go.

She forwarded a little and waved wildly at Moblit. “He already knew this!”

He turned to look at Georges and grabbed his hand, pulling him together with her. “Let’s go Georges. I bet your squad is also already looking for you too.”

They joined hands us they run forward Moblit and went to join the rest of the rest of the Corps.

**-x-**

When the sun decided to settle down and called it a day, the Recon Corps then proceeded to their usual castle to sleep in through the night. After everybody were all set to sleep, Levi decided to do the watch and firstly, roam around to check everyone that they are already asleep or ready to sleep.

At the farther left side of the castle, Levi was surprised to see Georges on his back, facing Hanji and what seemed like handing out flowers to her.

“I got them before the sun went down, Squad Leader.” Georges was blushing hard and looked like a kid who was pursuing his childhood crush.

Hanji giggled and took the flowers gently from his hand, smelling them and finally hugging them tight. “Thank you Georges! You shouldn’t have!”

Levi’s eye made its notable twitch of anger and he barge in, not caring if Hanji will get made or not. He leaned in on a pillar and crossed his hands, staring at them boringly.

“Aren’t you supposed to be in your beds already?” he asked boringly at them.

Hanji was surprised to see him and murmured his name softly. “Levi...” his name, coming out of her lips, her eyes full of surprise.

“Levi Heichou!”Georges suddenly backed off and waved his hand in a nervous manner. “I---I.. I was about to go!” he laughed and gave Hanji’s hand a kiss and dashed off pass by him and towards the door. “Goodnight Squad Leader Hanji and Levi heichou!” Hanji and Levi’s eye watched him run in fury towards the door.

Hanji turned to look at Levi, clutching the flowers in her hands. “You should be a bit soft with him, Levi.”

“Why should I?” Levi said in a disapproving voice. He walked towards her and had his eyes wonder on the flowers that she is holding. His eyes furthered followed her hands as she took a daisy and placed tucked it on her ear, making her irritably cute.

Levi felt his face turning hot and looked away. As Hanji gave him a smile and watch him of what he was doing, he took her hand and pulled her when she suddenly stopped and Levi turned to look at her back.

“Tsk. You should be sleeping, Shitty Glasses. Not flirting around with some asshole.”

“Levi ssshhhh! I don’t want Georges to hear that!” She looked rather hurt when Levi called the guy a dirty nickname.

“He already went out and is about to sleep. You should too, or else.” He felt his chest tightened of how she reacted towards a guy she barely knew, and wonder what made her talk towards him like that.

“Or else what?” They looked at each other’s face, Hanji searching for an answer on his face as he looked at hers with his forever expressionless eyes.

“Or else I’ll make you go to sleep at this instant, Shitty Glasses.” He smirked and held onto her hand tightly.

In that very instant, Hanji blushed and followed his tracks outside towards her bed with her squad. She knew he was just teasing but she sure can’t stop turning pink.

 

**-x-**

It was in the middle of the afternoon, their second of the field when Erwin gave the signal to finally retreat and go back inside the walls, telling his co-officers that they have reached their desired plan and one of them is to see the newly recruits and newly transferred soldiers abilities and limitations that could be possible to give help for the Recon Corps, just like how Levi had started and from the very moment he first killed a titan, together with Farlan and Isabel, the entire Legion had learned that he would be a great tool in defense for the titans. And from this journey, they also find out the same things just like before--- that Georges and a two more new soldiers can fend off more than five titans while on horseback with a minimum of seven meter as the smallest and at least two abnormals. Hanji was stunned of his great performance and that greatly irritated Levi.

When they have reached the final forest that they are to stumble on in the paths, Levi and Mike’s squad were all tasked to take up as a perimeter along the forest and should make sure that the Legion is safe. Their squads are the ones tasked to kill any titans that would enter from the outside while the rest of Legion Corps soldiers are to replenish themselves and make sure that they are ready to enter the walls with full tanked gas and complete blades in hand. Since Levi are tasked with Mike’s squad, he can get a better glimpse with that Georges guy and see if what the reports about him were true since he is still not yet convinced of how great he had performed within their entire mission.

While they are within the forest and two main squads are patrolling their safety, Hanji and the other squads are also needed to double check the gathered food, more animals that could be butchered to be eaten by the civilians of the walls and even to the entire Corps as well, at least minimize the spenditure over money and be allotted to even more important things for the Corps. They are also double their security measures and fixing the wagons and making sure that their horses can still go for about an hour or less.

The two squads didn’t know what it was that was taking those who were inside the forest too long and was not able to handle a horde of titans that had suddenly entered from the western side where only less than five soldiers from the great squads were assigned. Their anxious even got higher when three titans suddenly attacked and managed to get through, who were all more than ten feet high.

Hanji panicked and alerted everyone and helped as much as she can while Erwin shouted instructions and commands to the panicking set of soldiers. Being smart as she was, Hanji set out for the high ground, swinging and settling by on one of the nearest tree and stood on a branch as it let out a few crunchy creaks and see what is happening from the grounds so she can set out more accurate instructions and tell Erwin of what is happening and what is should be done. More titans has been entering and most of the soldiers that were inside the forest were all caught off guard and did their best to secure their belongings and gathered materials.

Most cannot fight since they are focusing on what is needed to be done, When suddenly, her eyes were averted by the sight of Levi who went in so suddenly and slayed from titan to titan with finesse. Hanji was struck by him as he went off, not even sure if he even saw her a few meters away from him. In the midst of his busy slaying of the titans making chaos all around, she still managed to look at him with intense eyes. She saw how beautiful he was, how he looked really great as she views him by his side. His nose was small but cutely pointed and his raven dark hair dancing in the wind making him looks like a flying god with small but strong body.

She had never much saw Levi in such beautiful angle before and even if she does, she doesn’t pay attention that much. Her mouth even hanged opened as she saw everything passed very slowly than usual. She watched as Levi blinked in between his attacks and still looked painfully dashing even if he looked angry as he fought. How does it that someone can actually looked handsome even if their angry while on a killing titan spree? Only Levi and Hanji smiled with enthusiasm as someone like him could actually do such a thing and she could get to get laid on him every once in a while and felt how lucky she was. It was even another bonus for her that she could get to spend a few important firsts with him as he is with her and would never even trade that for anything else in the world.

A few memories came rushing to her on he moves inside of her, how he touches her and kisses her until the middle of the night. She remembers his kindness and concern towards her and felt more than grateful that someone like him has interest of knowing her and getting too close to her as well. She realizes that her mouth was hanging open so bit her lower lip as she recalls how gently he could be when he mates with her to think he has hands that are too strong that could easily break her bones without a thought.

The recent and surprising acts that he had been doing to her--- at the stables, last night how he ‘flirts’ with her or jokes with her, if it’s indeed a joke to think jokes are half meant so maybe he still means what he had just did. And at that time before this mission of theirs where he kissed and held her after she had gone through her report and even talked about it with her, which he isn’t fond off but is forced to listen to with being a great comrade and all.

But then she remembers that he is her comrade, not lover. But as she stares at with full attention, amazed on how handsome and strong and fast he is, in killing titans as he is fast moving inside of her in bed or by the back--- that thought had made her blush like hell and only just a few fast seconds, a huge hand made an attack towards her, the branch she is standing on breaking right after. She was in a dazed and has not realized that she was falling when Moblit’s voice echoed in disbelief.

“SQUAD LEADER HANJI!” he screamed.

Hanji was used in falling but her senses came as slow as she stares at Levi earlier that her hands were shaking badly of fear of falling to her death and with her panic, had her gear stuck somewhere she has no time searching for. Thinking about it, maybe she had her gear checkup before the titans came rushing all of a sudden and most probably set something wrong or out looked something else instead like a malfunction perhaps was not able to attend into it so now she suffers the consequences.

She tried harder to make it work but wasn’t able to do so and suffers to the possible death when the titan fell even faster to the ground than her and she felt a warm and strong hold around of her and realizes that she is still alive and had been settled on the ground. Everything went so slow she had sworn that she had seen the ground coming near her nose but was caught to her safety.

She eyed her savior but instead saw Moblit rushing towards her screaming on top of his lungs as he gently helps her stand and check her from head to toe. Then she saw Levi by her side, that’s why she wasn’t able to see who her savior was because she was staring at a bit higher level. Before she was about to open her mouth and thank him, Erwin had ordered everyone to go towards the gates since they had managed to kill off the titans and should move immediately before a few more reaches them.

“RIGHT NOW! GET ON YOUR SQUADS AND GET BACK ON THE WALLS NOW!” Erwin’s voice echoes throughout the forest but another voice came a bit louder than his that screamed towards Hanji, making even Moblit looked so sudden.

“YOU’RE SO FUCKING STUPID!” he yelled up to her as he gripped on to her hair hard and his eyes galres at her so hard that his pupils were shaking with anger and then left them. Hanji stared at him in disbelief and saw how he left with fists balled hard on his sides and went together with his squad.

Hanji and Moblit gave each other a quick exchange of stares and followed the rest of towards the gate of their homes.

**-x-**


	6. You're the Cure to My Pain

**Chapter 6:**

**You’re the Cure to my Pain**

 

 

 

**-x-**

The mission lasted for two and a half day, enough to see all of the newly gathered transferred recruits’ ability outside and killing titans. Erwin and the rest of the major leaders were able to find out and determine among them where they can be placed permanently and have their abilities used properly well.

Levi was one of the very last who came back inside the walls, the crowds always cheering for his return. He was delighted to see everybody back, except the poor five soldiers who they have lost due to an unexplained technical difficulties of the gear and the others, by an unexpected attack of an abnormal titan, maybe no good communications at all as they were pursuing it. Though he was still shaken by the thought that Hanji was almost one of them.

Pretty much the same as they come back, kept on a line as the townspeople looked at them in wonder and in amazement. What was something new to his eyes was to see Hanji together with Georges, talking as they were on their horses. She was laughing, he could tell, even if she had her back turn against him.

He shrugged his shoulders unexpectedly. What was it that they are talking about and she is laughing like that?

He was curious and wanted to find out what it was about, angered even by the sight that he had just seen.

He decided to wait for Hanji in the stables so he could grab her and have her on his own. Unfortunately, Georges still looked like he enjoyed being with Hanji and he still even went with her in the stables. He gritted his teeth and passed by them instead and did not talk to them but did glared at Hanji straight in the eyes and said nothing of some sort to the young man who greeted him.

“He is always not in the mood Georges, he _will_ like you soon” he heard her said to the newly recruit.

After dealing with all the final jobs needed to be taken care of every after mission, he went straight to his room and cleansed himself, taking a quick bath and didn’t even took his dinner with his own squad. He laid on his bed a bit and thought about how stupid Hanji had gotten, that he almost lost her and in return, show him how she adores Georges and didn’t even made any effort to come to him and thank him for saving her life.

It actually pisses him off so by the moment he stood up, he immediately went straight towards Hanji’s room and barged in and locks the door tightly.

“Levi!” she squealed out as he enters her room. She looked so happy as though she just didn’t had a few moments before she meets her end.

“Hey I wan---“

“No you listen you shitty ass glasses!” he tells her with tone a bit higher than usual and rushed through her direction. He pushed her through the wall and had his arms placed between her, cornering her with no chance of getting away.

Hanji stared at him as his eyes like earlier in the forest, angrily shaking as he talked with teeth gritting in anger. If they were in a better mood, she’ll joke about how weird it is that she is looking down on his height so she tried to make herself smile, probably it might at least change his mood but all she could make was an unsettled and nervous half smile.

“Levi…” she murmured and she was shocked when he suddenly threw a punch on the wall, right beside her jaw. She flinched with his sudden attack, and accidentally moved an inch, he would have hit her jaw instead and swears that it’ll break half of her face. Staring at him, he still looks angry but why?

“What did I told you about keeping your ass safe out there? And you didn’t even listen!? How stupid could you even get!?” he asked her and did even let her even let out an explanation in any of his questions.

“But Levi I---“

“No! Fuck you for getting yourself almost killed out there and have my ass save yours!”

He suddenly opened and pulled her pants down. He kicked them lower to her ankles and bents down to have them removed entirely off her. Somehow, he is lucky that she is no longer wearing any of her gear belts and he successfully pulls her pants and underwear with ease.

The woman stared at him in disbelief and had her mouth opened all of a sudden. She felt like she is in need to tell something to him but can’t find the words to say and is feared that he might do something even more horrible since he is capable of killing her in an instant, most especially that he is more dominant than her in this kind of position that they are in.

Seeing the way she reacted but didn’t fought, he smirked devilishly and licked his index and middle fingers and inserted it to her. The brunette let out a yelp of discomfort and twitched in suddenness that she had felt entered her. She doesn’t know why he is doing this but she sure knows that she shouldn’t make him even angrier than he is now.

“I’ll make you feel what it feels like seeing you so fucking dumb out there and being careless as shit!” he tells her with unbroken gaze and works his fingers inside of her. Hanji tried to contain her squeals of discomfort and bit her lip hard. When he had enough, he removed his fingers off her and places his hand on her shirt and ripped it open, her other buttons scrambling on the floor.

She was shocked when Levi even removed her bra and removed her remaining clothing off her chest and threw them on the floor. She felt so exposed and Levi hungrily sucked on her breast while his hand worked on the other, pinching her breast a bit harshly than he does before then had his mouth worked on the other. He bit and licked and sucked, her breast feeling a bit numb and difficult on how he worked on them. The way he does it was definitely not gentle and yet he seems too eager to do that to her.

He went down further to her stomach and instead of licking her belly button which she always loved and make her feel excited, he bit her there hard, making her drew back and had her hands gripped on his shoulders, her nails scraping his milk white skin. She looked away in annoyance and guilt, she feels really horrible about this and she is just letting him do this to her. If he is making efforts to make her feel sexy and wet, is not really working at all.

She could completely see the red markings on her skin and even the now forming bruises that his fingers are leaving on her chest, breasts and even down to her abdomen. She was already breathing hard, not knowing of what will happen next and what she should better do when he stopped biting her by her stomach and her hip and she let out a few sigh of relief.

But fear came once again when he opens his pants and wiggled them off his legs and threw them on the floor as well as she watched in terror. Before she could even react, he had already carried her, her legs open tangled against his hips and saw how he frankly inserts his length inside of her.

Levi felt really furious and anxious at the same time and felt that she is not wet enough and had to thank his spit and fingers for making her at least a bit slippery. It’s a good thing she is not heavy and he is too strong to even position themselves this way on the wall, having no effort at all. He watched her as she breathes air heavily, her chest moving fast but hard and looks away by the other wall of her room. He saw that her eyes were a bit glassy already but he didn’t cared. She let herself be careless and almost had gotten into her death and then end the day flirting with a new soldier? Definitely not good.

Her eyes grew big as she felt herself being ripped into half while Levi enters her crazily. She thought he’d wait for her before he sets his pace but ended up working inside of her earlier and faster than she had thought. He lifted her with ease and cornered her, his hands on her hips and waist as he groan. Every thrust that he makes made her hit her head by the brick wall a bit hard and she could swear that if they lasted half an hour like this, if she is lucky enough to even contain the pain, she would end up breaking her skull and lose half her knowledge. What he was doing to her had already made her body trembled and felt her bones detaching from one another. She could even feel how her dignity be shattered even more into pieces as he moves inside of her.

Instead of getting mad or even making a move to coil back and push him away which she is really tempted to do, she decided to embrace his head and shoulders, enveloping them on her arms as her head leans closer to his, placing her strength of disregarding the pain he is giving her. His face was deep into her chest almost suffocating since it was really hard to hit the mark of pleasure when she is not wet at all.

“How many times do I have to watch over your ass and make sure you’re fucking alive!? How many times!?” he yelled at her in every painful thrust that he made. “This is not the first time that you almost got yourself killed Hanji, but I fucking swear that this is the worst!”

Up and over she goes and Levi didn’t stop, none of them nearing their peak of exhaustion or their sweet release of pleasure. He tucks her even tighter into his hips and threw her on the bed, her back flat on the sheets of her bed.

He took that as a chance to stare at her naked form on her bed and took of his remaining clothes on his body before taking her legs and opening them as they can and slid his length again inside of her. Hanji shrieked and cupped her mouth with both of her hands and let Levi do his shit on her. She let him move in and out of her hard as she watched the ceiling move itself on her gaze. Her body arched but flattened as he moved further, adapting in the pain and exhaustion.

“If I told you to keep your ass off danger then you should know how to keep your promise!” he tells her as he grip on her numb waist to steady her as he moved as much as he can. “You left me with no choice but to punish you with your careless ass!”

She shut her eyes and contained the tears that were threatening to go down her cheek. She could feel that she is losing her body already and only feel her head. Good thing she has a huge pain tolerance but with what Levi is doing to her, she is not sure how much she could handle the pain that he is causing her. The only things that are entering her ears were Levi’s growls, their heavy breathing and the sound of the slapping of their body. Her poor thin body was already shivering uncontrollably and wondered how many hours or most probably days she needed to have it stopped on her own.

He stopped yet again and had her eyes stare at him a bit. Her nostrils were flaring with heated breathing and her fingers are gripping on the bed sheets hard that if they are not there, she would end up tearing her own skin. Her eyes opened questioningly and stared at him, catching her breath while she saw him wiping away his sweaty forehead and let out a deep sigh.

He grip on her foot and turned her forcefully, her abdomen flat on her bed and her chin graze over the sheets as her hands were on her cheeks. She gathered as much air as she can and braced herself for the most probable thing that Levi could do to her, and she is hoping that she could still manage to do it.

“You want to learn your lesson in the hard way eh!? I never knew you were such a slow learner when I teach you in keeping your fucking ass safe!” he tells on her ear and she let out a squeak. Then, he did the unthinkable--- he slapped her ass, _hard_ and a light uncontrolled sob came out of her. She felt horrible when he did that, that’s why he never does it to her everytime they are having sex. She felt like some kind of mindless animal or slave.

Levi held on her hips for the nth time and rode her mercilessly again and this time, by the time he only did managed to do five thrusts on her she already panicked and tried to loosen under his hold. He too was surprised of her sudden escaping movements of escape under his wrath.

“Levi!” she chocked, can’t contain the pain any longer. “Please! I can’t!” she begged but Levi made no attempt to stop. She tried to kick her legs but his grip was hard on her so she lifts herself by the use of her arms and squirmed hard. She can feel that either of them won’t be able to get the lustful feeling since knowing Levi, if he would have reached his limit then he should have already done so way earlier already but after almost half an hour feeling nothing, then he seems to be not getting what he really wanted.

“Please stop already!” she tells him, convinced that this won’t go anywhere that they wanted. She’s too scared and weak and he is too angry and forceful, totally a not compatible aspects of attaining sexual pleasures.

“Shut up!”

“No! Levi! You’re hurting me already!” she sobbed and that made a few kick to Levi to get back into reality. He stopped and stared at the woman who he is straddling from the back, sobbing already and drenched in terrible amount of sweat. She was gripping on the sheets hard and still wouldn’t let go even if he had stopped.

He blinked a few more times but was indeed right of what he is seeing and suddenly felt horrible and disgusted to his self. With light and careful movements, he pulled out of her as gently as he can and was terrified when he saw an amount of blood crippling on his length. He knew definitely well that she was bleeding because of him.

In panic, he wanted to have her sit straight and face him but when he was about to touch her shoulders to have her sit with him on the bed but his hands were trembling that all he knew he was feeling is that he is way too reluctant to touch even a tiny bit of her body and feared he might hurt her again. He was paralyzed and he can’t think a thing. Instead, with a shaking move, he looked for a towel and carefully pats it into her entrance as light and gentle as he could. He even thought that she might kick him away but she didn’t even made a move so he stared at her, face still stuck on the bed.

“Hanji...” he murmured but her sobs didn’t stopped.

Every muscle on her body feels numb and sore and feared if she can still move her legs or not. She had never felt such pain in sex with Levi ever. Their first time together was sure hell of a pain but this was worst, it was thrice the pain of her first time with him. She didn’t know what to do or how to react to him but allowed her to cry out in pain for a while before she thinks of a proper thing to do with him.

With disgrace, he sat by the end of her bed and stared at the floor. He heard her sobbing stopped but he still refused to look at her. How could he when he just violated her beyond her limitation and acted like a total asshole as though he is not a trusted comrade of hers?

Maybe she shouldn’t just trust him in the first place.

He wanted to talk to her, to tell her how disgraceful he had acted towards her and that he promises to maintain his distance away from her and that he won’t hurt her again at all cost. His sweat produced from his forced lustful feeling was replaced by nervous ones and he had only his bare hands to wipe them off away. He wanted to run away instead but if he does that, he knows it’ll be a bigger problem and that he will have his image be even worse than shit for her leaving her in such dreadful state. He could feel his heart still beating hard and fast but he is so confused and doesn’t know what to do next.

Should he speak and tell her how he fucking regrets that he hurt her that bad? Or should he make a few more moves but way soothing and careful this time, but what if she pushes him away this time? She didn’t made a move earlier alright but it doesn’t mean that everything is okay between them already. He is way uncertain and he couldn’t even stand the eeriness that is breaking his ears.

A sudden warmth came from a pair of hands crept onto his skin, slowly making their way towards his abdomen and locking them there. His eyes softened with surprised and when he was about to look by his side, he was stopped when he felt a familiar nose on his back, snuggling along the sweatiness of his skin and a cold cheeks pressed along the strong path of his spine. He felt vigorous coming back to his veins again when he felt her breathing on his skin and places one small and gentle kiss, just one and then she pulls him for an embrace, her arms tightening along his lower abdomen.

He leans himself harder on her embrace and she twitched and let out an undesirable squeak when she opened her legs so he could lean in on her harder. He got so worried that he looked to her but when he was about to turn his head, she kissed his scalp and deepened her cheek onto his head. If they weren’t in such shitty situation, he might tell her to stop because that kind of position made him feel like a kid being hugged by some adult but indulged into the warmth of her embrace even further. He could feel her breasts pressing hard on him and her heart beating hard and he couldn’t even feel any worse. She feels horrible and it’s his fault.

Her fingers didn’t rub his chest like she usually does to him but kept on his abdomen and after a few moments, went up to keep it there on his chest and stayed there. Her sobbing was fortunately done because it will surely drive him insane if it continues and does not know what he will do. He still couldn’t do anything since he is still afraid of hurting her again. He wanted to turn and face her and most probably kiss her or just nibble on her lips even if she doesn’t react back and nudge his nose on her as much as he could while pressing quick kisses on her.

He cares for her so much but is still caught in the middle of huge exhaustion and confusion. Somehow, he felt calm and serene as she holds him and he had the chance to think about what had made him do that to her, even if it’s beyond his likeness to do so. He had never thought that he could even lose his temper to her that bad and hurt her.

He was just scared that she almost had gotten herself killed and finished the day flirting with some asshole and saw how she laughed heartily with him on the way back. He got so mad and confused and that he was not able to control his self-further with the anger he felt. He usually sets on fire on the other soldiers and not to her. He blames the curly browned hair asshole of a shit that he felt that way on her and hurted her unexpectedly.

Seeing Levi look so uneasy and tremble like she does suddenly made her feel worried all of a sudden, even every pain on her body suddenly going away. Knowing his background like nobody even does better, how he grew up protecting the people around him and grew up without experiencing of being fully protected and secured from the dangers around him. Hanji knew of that pain and wondered how he could have even endured such part of his life but thought that maybe that was also the reason why he had become as strong as he is now. She had already developed a feeling of care and protectiveness towards him, even if she thinks he doesn’t need it and would tell her it was not necessary. Even in this very situation, he needs to be taken care of, even if he thinks he doesn’t deserve it for what he had just done.

“I’m sorry” he finally blurted out. “I really am fucking sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you like that I was just t---“

Hanji pulls him slightly by the side to face her and she harshly indulged onto his lips. She massaged his lips slowly and bit them like she is tasting a few cherries. He was caught off guard but he very lightly returned the kisses and let her hands caress his face and his hair. When she pulled away to look at him and search his face, his eyes drifted away and looked elsewhere. She wanted to let out a giggle as to how he looked so scared and embarrassed at the same time so she flashes him a half smile.

Very gently, she places her forehead to his and closes her eyes. “I understand why you did that.” She tells him but only a sigh came out of him. Those made her open her eyes and stare at his tensed eyes.

“Look, I really do. You just told me right? I just didn’t realized that you care that much about me and when you saved me from death I was beyond grateful, I really do. If the fall doesn’t kills me, perhaps the titan did but you were there Levi, you were there.” She tries to convince him and pulled on his hair lightly so she could force him to stare back at her.

“Witnessing me almost dying made you really angry huh?” she asked him and his eyes shook with fear.

“But I ju---“

“Sssshhhh.” She whispers to him and cradled him on her chest. Without hesitation, he adjusted himself carefully around her legs and buried himself on her embrace. She was too nice, too understanding and he wondered if he even deserves such thing at all. He had always been harsh and too pushy, he doesn’t deserved to be understand at all.

“I know why you care too much, trust me.” She added and he felt he wanted to kill himself for hurting a very kind and understanding person like her. Still, he felt uneasy since she might be thinking differently, that he cares for her deeply because she was just his blow up friend when she is more than that. She was a person who had understood him even to the very depths of his skin.

“It’s okay Levi, I’m alright.” She tells him and kisses his jaw. A few seconds after came a hot tear and fell on his cheek. He looked up and used his thumb to wipe the other away and kisses her light and slow, testing how she would react.

Fortunately, she reacted as sweet as he liked even if it was unexpected and even places wraps her palm around his face, pressing her lips even harder on his. She let her tongue lightly inside of his and he accepted it with delight. He sucked her and tilts his head so she could enter him in a different angle. He felt her smile on his lips so he pulled away a few inches to see her smile.

He places his hands on top of hers as she held his face, their nose nudging to each other. Her eyes were still showing a bit of pain and worry but she doesn’t seem scared of him, even if her hands shows like wise.

“I’m okay.” He stared at her hard before embracing him a bit tighter than he expected but she didn’t pushed him away or show him that she is hurting and places another set of kisses on top of his head before settling her face on to him.

“I’m still fucking sorry. I’m really sorry Hanji.”

“You just lose your control, that’s what had happened.” She tried to think about if it’s other girls were on her shoes, they might have probably been died because of the pain on the body but fortunately, she is unlike them. Although thin, her body is capable of doing and managing a lot of things.

Levi caressed his nose on her chest and Hanji giggled, even pulling him tighter to her.

“You know, you shouldn’t just allow things like that to happen to you.” He tells her without even looking at her.

An awful silence drenched in right after and she evens topped caressing and cradling him and he thought that he might have hurt her feelings this time. He had his fingers traced the bits of bruises now forming on her chest when she suddenly spoke.

“But it’s you Levi. How can I say no to you? You know you have been the very closest friend and best comrade here right?” she whispered, her tone a bit in pain since she thought that he might have been forgetting about that fact.

“I just hurt you Hanji, and made you feel fucking horrible. Where’s the best comrade in there or the clo---“

“Hey” she took his chin and looked at his eyes deeply. “Everybody commits mistakes.” He stared at her uneasily, uncertain of her words but he refused to argue so he returned his head on her chest and breathed in her scent, feeling her warmth.

They settled themselves on top of her bed, bare and had each other to warm one another on each other’s arms.

 

**-x-**

 

What had happened last night made Levi realized that the relationship he shares with her was beyond what he could have imagined. It could go from very shitty worse to extremely free from any form of hate and guilt but a lesson was left. He never thought that it felt great having a huge ass problem with someone but being able to work it out and move on. He felt even freer and even open with her than before. The feeling was so enlightening that he to be with her more throughout the day. Unfortunately, he can’t find her anywhere. He had left her on her room during the morning and even left her a light kiss on the cheek. He even planned to go away quietly but felt horrible again as he remembers that he just made her feel so bad the night before so he bid his farewell to her, whispering it to her ears. She did woke up a bit and smiled, telling him to go ahead.

“Squad leader had decided to take an extra time on her bed I believe so, heichou” Moblit tells him when he looked for her in her laboratory but Moblit was the only one there. “I went to check on her since it’s almost noon and still haven’t come here yet and told me she is not feeling well.”

“I see” Levi felt a lump on his throat suddenly, his heart ripping slowly. Why hadn’t she mentioned anything to him when he left her there? “Do you know why?” he added.

“She said she has her monthly cycle.” He awkwardly answered but the smaller man doesn’t seem to mind. Levi pats Moblit’s shoulder and went along his way, his mind suddenly flaking.

Levi immediately enters Hanji’s room with a knock and was told to enter. With nervousness and uneasiness on his chest, he entered and saw her, lying on top of her bed, flat on her back and is wearing her complete uniform. Her hair was tied but had a few mess and she looks like she had just lost all her blood on her face.

“Hanji?” he muttered.

“Hey” She smiled at him with a mixture of bothered and comfort as he saw his worried expression. Levi’s legs were dangling with fear and anxiousness as he came closer to her and sat beside her. He carefully took her hand and places the other on her face. He searched her face, but all he could see was calmness, not even a hint of grudge against him or anything.

“I was having my period and it was really bad.” She tells him because he looks really worried but can’t find the right words to ask.

After a brief look on her, he swayed his head side to side. “I don’t think so. This is my fault. Look what I’ve done to you?” his voice broke.

“No, I was really supposed to have my period anytime this week and maybe what had happened last night had triggered my period or something, so it’s not your fault.” She explains.

“What do you mean not my fault? You just mentioned that what happened last night wa---“

“I said _maybe,_ Levi. Since it is rightfully scheduled anytime this week, then today is one of those days that I could have my period then right?”

He stared at her with disbelief but he can’t think of anything else to say. It’s pointless to tell her that it’s his fault since if what she is saying is true, and then he will just lose having an argument with her. But despite of her words, he still couldn’t trust them. He remembered the trails of blood that had retained on his penis after what he did last night. It was only a few drops or stain on his length but he didn’t thought that it was that bad on her.

“How do you feel?” he asked her instead. “Do you feel sore inside?”

Hanji bit her lip then looked back to him again. “A bit” she shyly said and fixed her back on the pillow. “But I’m okay, my tummy is just making me feel weird and I have to many blood for my first day so I feel a bit uncomfortable.”

“Many… blood?” he whimpered, staring blankly at her.

“Levi, it’s not your fault. First days are usually full of blood okay? Stop thinking that it’s your fault. Get over it already because I already did.” Her tone was starting to change and become annoyed so he didn’t dared to answer back, though he still partly feels guilty. She stretched her hands and cupped his faced and slowly stroke his cheek to calm him down, which seemed to take effect even a little, much to her relief.

“Can you move?”

“Yeah but I just want to rest.” She sighed.

He nodded and touched her forehead. “No fever, just pain. Want me to do something?”

“Like what?” she asked, her eyes finally closed in defeat breathed in deeply.

“Tell Moblit that you won’t be able to work in the laboratory today? I can assure him not to bother you.”

Hanji smiled but not opening her eyes and look at him. “That’ll be okay but I’ll go a bit later, so there’s no need for you to do that. I want to finish even something for today and I won’t be able to get to sleep tonight if won’t be able to finish it.” He knows that to be true, remembering how she whine about her unfinished works and won’t have sex with him one night. It was fucking annoying and horrible that he ended up helping her finish instead.

“Okay, how about if I get you anything?”

“No thanks. Moblit had already brought me something to eat earlier.”

Levi nodded even if she didn’t see it and brushed his fingers to her cheek. “Tell me if you need anything.”

“I will heichou.” She tells him before he went off.

As she moved to face her side and heard his footsteps go, she can’t help but think. For her part it was not the scars or the bruises or even the blood that she had shed because of what he did to her but what bothered her the most was the very best friend and most unquestionable comrade of hers had violated her and made her feel the worst painful feeling ever that she had never imagined in her life. The fact that he didn’t stopped immediately or saw how painful she looked like made her think that he is _selfish_ but he got too overwhelmed and so into it that it was impossible to make him stop right away.

She did saw the pain and worry on his eyes and felt his sincerity and she can’t help but feel worried about him as well. She had never wanted to make him feel that the world is horrible and that things are better for him but seeing him helpless like that, she still felt sorry. She hadn’t lost her entire her and soul and get angry at him. Besides, he had always been the best for her and she knew that he just really lost it. Funny he even got pretty mad because of her being careless and almost dying that he did that to her.

She smiled and tucked her hands on the left side of her head.

That’ll be the first and the last time, they had vowed last ngiht before they went to sleep and there is still part of her that wanted to forgive him. Thinking about it, it’s like he is her weakness but she can’t stop herself from caring for him so much since ever since, he had _always_ been caring to her in his own way as well that no one ever had done even from the smallest things, except for Moblit since it’s his job and Erwin since they are close as well and he is their commander so it can’t be helped.

Even if she saw a monster last night that had suddenly came back to his true form, her friend, she still couldn’t just allow her heart to lock itself away from him just like that.

 

%MCEPASTEBIN%


	7. Still in My Heart This Moment, or It Might Burst

** Chapter 7: **

** Still in My Heart This Moment or It Might Burst **

 

 

**-x-**

It had been a few months after what had happened and Levi was happy to see that Hanji has been better. He had tried his best to try to avoid her so he could give her some space that she needed since he knew that it is unforgivable to violate your comrade that way and yet she had given him a chance. She would still wave and smile at him everytime she’s going to see him and would give his shoulder a squeeze but if there would be even fewer people around, she would give his hand a squeeze instead of his shoulder.

She was incredibly nice and exceptionally great from the way she had captured the hearts and will of the higher ups the previous day about arm conference regarding the ‘inner and personal conflicts’ that the Recon Corps and the Military Police are having together and has not yet been solved up until now. She had proposed ways and projects that could lead two great groups of soldiers to serve the human race as they work together with their differences. Her speech and proposals earned a thunderous applause and agreement from the supreme commander and she couldn’t be even grateful, Erwin especially. He was so proud of her being smart and having her in the Corps.

Levi watched her with great enthusiasm and had held solid gazes in between her speeches since she feel like she can focused more knowing that he is paying attention. Secretly, she had wanted to try practicing her speech in front of him naked but he refused to even have sex with her for four nights before. She had also observed how he had avoided her completely and she didn’t like it.

After the speech and the other meetings that she had with the supreme commander and the head leaders of the Military Police, she finally had the chance to talk to Levi but of course, she had him by surprise so he wouldn’t be able to say ‘no’ to her. She immediately went to his room one night, a day after her meetings and conferences with the Military Police and with Erwin.

When she opened his bedroom door, he was lying on top of his bed and looked shaken up. His eyes were closed and he is taking slow average breathing, his hair disheveled. If she could only say it, she would have told him that he looked really cute. Instead, she jumped on top of him and strangled him.

“What the fuck!?” he yelled and fought back cautiously.

She roared and took a hold of his wrist down but he managed to exchanged positions with her so he ended up being on top of her. Both of them catches their breath as they stared at each other’s eyes not until Levi realizes the position that they were having and removed himself on top of her and sat beside her instead.

“What are you doing here?” he asked, voice low and not looking at her.

Hanji was laughing and sat on her place. “I came here to see you, since you were avoiding me.”

Levi didn’t said anything nor even moved. Hanji crawled to him and places her arms around him. He didn’t moved as she do so, so it is alright to hug him then she thought.

“Be careful Levi, you might really won’t be able to talk me again like before if you kept doing that you know?” she warned and Levi glares at her hard. First, he thought that she might think that that he will violate her again but he bit the inside of his mouth and held his breath. He never wanted that to happen since they were the only ones who listens to each other the most but her words to him placed a harsh pang of pain on his chest.

“What the fuck are you saying now shitty four eyes?”

“You don’t know, I might be gone soon and you might never get to talk to me again and you’ll regret avoiding me for nothing.” It was like she was testing him again whether he will violate her again forcefully or not, but he didn’t show any sign of wanting to violate her anyway.

“Stop saying such shit.”

“Stop avoiding me. I know it’s because of what had happened but come on! Get over it already!” she whined and hugged his arm tightly. “It was actually really nothing Levi! And I kind of, really miss you already.” She shyly murmured.

“It wasn’t just nothing Four Eyes! It wasn’t!” he insisted and let that out a bit in a surprisingly higher note. He what he had done to her a lot. Just seeing even a tiny glimpse of blood makes him shiver and even in his sleep, he is still being haunted by what he had done to her. Nevertheless, he had realized a couple of things with what he had did to her; first is that it is better if both of them would enjoy sex together, not just having only one of them enjoy it alone and second is that with her open and forgiving heart, he can’t ignore the feeling and erase the thought that she would make a very nice and loving mate if she ever she is to become a lover to someone.

Whoever that bastard is, that person if fucking fortunate.

He had already accepted the fact that he is not the one for her since they share a lot of differences. Just from their backgrounds and personalities, people will frown onto them if they are to be together. That thought made him dizzy and shot a pang of pain thru his chest. But then he also saw the image of Georges getting cozy and locking his lips with Hanji and he instantly tightened his grip onto the bed sheet.

Whether he still thinks that part of him is crazy everytime he will think about it but he really doesn’t want that to happen. As much as he wanted Hanji to have the free will to be happy and in love, he still can’t accept it if he is to see her with somebody else’s arms. He wanted to see her smile and laugh because of him, not because of someone else.

Hanji backed a bit when Levi raised his voice to her but the sudden shift of his eyes with torment to a more softer one melted her heart. She saw that he is still haunted by what he had done to her but she wanted to liberate him from such deadening state. She is not used seeing him act this way, awkward and wary and she desperately wanted back what they have before, a casual and strong bond between two comrades in arms.

Levi lifts a hand and places it on top of her head, his fingers rubbing her scalp and he sighed. She doesn’t have any idea that he is haunted of her sobbing face whenever he sees her and reminds him of her trembling body when he comes near her.

“Promise to get over it?” she asks and playfully kisses his jaw, not removing her cheek to his.

He shrugged. “Fine.” He snorted as she laughed.

They had talked a lot during the time at her speech (and she even teases him how he looked so tensed but cute while she talks), how they are doing since they feel like they missed a lot from one another and headed back to her room.

Hanji would never ever allow Levi to feel bad, most especially if she is the reason since she had long vowed that she will make his friend happy at all cost because he too deserves to smile, after experiencing growing up in a harsh way. He may have hurt her a lot but that was only one time and it’ll be the last and she knows it. She found it easy to forgive him and move on because she knows he is very sorry and too was hurt of what he had done to her. He was a great friend and an ally who she can never really bear to go just easily out of her life.

Levi in turn fixed himself on his bed. Absently, he smiles to himself thinking how things will be better now, now that he feels better of being near her again. He doesn’t feel bothered anymore and would think more of the friendship and bond that they have.

He lay by his bed and thought of how Hanji showed her interest with Georges throughout their entire previous mission. Instead of filling worried, he thought how she desperately wins him back even if she was the one who got hurt. He is convinced that she too is experiencing more than just friendship for him, he hoped. His hand went well together on top of his movement of his stomach as the other is at the back of his head, combing his own hair absently.

He knew he shouldn’t feel worried sick and shit but he can’t have it remove out his chest. First of all, she was his comrade. _But not just any other comrade,_ his other mind reminded him and the pictures of her smiling absently as she sleep after their love making or the way she settles her head on his, the feeling of her hand hugging him by his waist and pulling him closer to her body suddenly came to his mind and he groaned in anger.

In his mind, they acted like more than comrades, more than just friends. At night they acted like mad lovers losing their minds over each other but at sun rise, they are nothing but professional comrades. It sounds and feel so wrong but he doesn’t want it to end or to stop so suddenly.

His hand went to his chest, the part where his beating heart is and closed his eyes, feeling its every beat. He tried to feel if it’s desire inside so it could help his mind to think but nothing came.

He rolled on the other side of the bed, facing the wall and grabbed a pillow to hug it. It was too soft, unlike Hanji who is perfectly balanced in all sort of ways. Not too soft nor hard, her framework making her a bit hard to hug but her skin and flesh balances her hard framework, but definitely really great to hug, to embrace and lock to his arms. How he wished it was her who he is embracing at the very moment.

He tried to think of the bitter reality, that it not just lust that he feels for her. Surely there is concern and protectiveness, a feeling of friendship and comradely but he sure is feeling that there is something more that is why he is feeling such a different and odd feeling right now and finds himself confused of the probable truth.

Somehow in the back of his head, as he tried to sleep, he hoped that she too, is experiencing and feeling the confusion that he is feeling.

 

 

**-x-**

 

Hanji had been recently an hour earlier than her usual wake up time and finds herself enjoying breakfast with Georges. He would be the one to get her her food and would indulge with such comfortable conversations afterwards, Hanji had been recently an hour earlier than her usual wake up time and finds herself enjoying breakfast with Georges. He would be the one to get her her food and would indulge with such comfortable conversations afterwards, they would go to her laboratory and study some plants and insects that they think were needed to be studied further. By the time Levi goes down to the hall and eat breakfast, she was nowhere to be found already.

Before lunch and at afternoon, Hanji would be busy with her research on the titans as Moblit helps her around, as well as her squad, no more needing of Georges and his wit.

“I hope you could be a part of my team too Georges, you really are interested in find the answers almost into everything and your determination to help me was really nice.” She told him one day when she was about to go and have her research on the titans.

“Me too Squad Leader, I really hope so too.” He smiled warmly at her and she flushed.

An idea came to her head and she immediately got back to her usual self. “M-mmaybe I could talk to Erwin about it! Who knows, I might have you in my squad! Everyone will love you!” she giggles.

Georges’ lips turned into a straight smile and crept up to her slowly. He took her into a surprise embrace and her eyes widened in surprise. She stiffened on his embrace and since he is taller than her, her face landed of his chest and heard how his heart beating. She listened carefully and closed her eyes in concentration and found her arms coming to lock in his neck. “I wish that could really happen, Squad Leader.” Georges whispers to her ear as he pulled her tighter into his embrace. Luckily, no one is around her laboratory except them.

“Hey Four Eyes!” It was Levi’s voice and he suddenly pushed opened her laboratory door and in a quick second, the both separated at each other’s arms, face red and looked at Levi.

Levi couldn’t believe what he had just saw. He had never saw Hanji hugged Moblit or anyone else in her squad, maybe Mike before and Erwin but that was really once and he sure knows that she only hugs him, and only him. His eye twitched in disbelief as his hands balled hard on his clothes and a lump forming his throat. He can’t find his voice and didn’t said a word.

It was Hanji who broke the eerie silence first. “H-hhey Levi!” Hanji smiled at him and waved a little then scratched her head.

“G-good afternoon, Heichou.” Georges bowed politely and saluted at him.

“Nothing’s good in the afternoon if you’re here at the laboratory when I am supposed to have a fucking conversation with Hanji, Georges.” He said coldly at the young man. The moment he heard it, his smiled turned down and excused himself out of the laboratory. His head was a bit down but he did gave Hanji a sad smile and a slight bow.

Hanji watched him go out of her laboratory in a worried face. Right after he closes the door, she went to glare at Levi. She approached him and slapped his face hard. Twice.

“That’s for me and for Georges. What the hell is your problem?” she asked him, her voice a bit high and sure is frowning at him. “Doesn’t mean that we can do a lot of things together means you are free to do anything you want with anyone close to me and especially him. I can see how much you despise him even if he had never done anything wrong to you even if I don’t get it at all.” She turned her back against him and continued on her work.

Levi was astonished. He was just slapped by Hanji on the face, _twice._ And she did that because of what he had done and because of that asshole? Had she even slapped anyone because she was protecting him of some sort? He can’t believe that she just did that to him. He felt his cheek grew hot and he scrubbed his palm on his cheek. He didn’t blink nor even moved from where he was standing.

After a couple of minutes of touching his burning cheek, shrugged and came to her side, watching her work. “He _is_ my problem Hanji. The moment he came here, all he knew was just to flirt around and show how fucking chivalry is supposed to be and now he had the balls to hug a squad leader! Who the fuck does that?” he said mockingly. He doesn’t really know if the slap hurts more than her words.

Hanji stiffened and looked at the floor, gathered her energy and said “he does.”

Levi rolled his eyes in disgust. “So you’re okay with that? How about you show him a bit of authority, to know that he can’t just easily grab you all the time and shit Hanji.” He didn’t mean to sound offensive but fuck, he needs to make her stop cuddling with that guy.

“He still does respect me Levi and whatever it is that we have, it’s none of your business.” She retorted back. “Who do you even think you are to act like all boss and shit Levi? It doesn’t mean that you’re the Recon Corps mighty Captain and the World’s Strongest Man you can act up all boss and shit with everyone around you! I’m telling you Levi, it’s not a decent attitude. Through the years I’ve been with you, I have always respected and admired you in all angles but if you’re going to keep this up with Georges, I fear that I might no longer talk to you again.” Her words sure did sting him that much that his eyes soften but her point is that, who the fuck is he to get mad at her just like that? She understands that he might just be concerned about her but he still should back off between her and Georges issue, like how Georges doesn’t give a crap about whatever it is that she and Levi has.

“Look, I really understand your concern towards me but you really are getting too much now between me and Georges. It doesn’t mean that we are able to fix a couple of problems between us means you are free to act like a total asshole again Levi.” The way she pronounced his name with that statement of hers felt he is directly being degraded.

Levi no longer answered back, it’s not his intention to suddenly go on with his raging self-tonight but when those words came out of Hanji’s mouth, that he shouldn’t give a fuck with what’s going on between her and Georges and about him being an asshole, he suddenly felt a lightning struck him down. He knows it shouldn’t pinch him and make him feel a bit of a pain but it was enough to make his heels turn back and go out.

“Don’t mind about what I said.” He lowered his head a bit, enough for his hair to cover his eyes for fully showing how he was _saddened_ about her words to him. “I am sorry I disturb you.” With no looking back at her to see of how she had reacted, he made his way towards his squad outside without even glancing back at her.

 

­ **-x-**

Hanji sighed as Levi made his way out of her laboratory, knowing that she said something that made Levi acted like that all of a sudden. In truth, he never showed some attitude like that like he was turned down or disapproved but it was enough to make her rethink of what she had said and done. When she think over it, she didn’t found anything wrong with anything. She said the truth, that he doesn’t care about her and Georges and that she is still being respected by that man and about him being an asshole, which she kind of regretted.

So what could possibly have gone wrong? It was also right for her to somehow defend the innocent man from being showered and being treated like some criminal where in fact, he never even laid a finger towards Levi and to remind him to at least stay humble as well.

Maybe, just maybe, that Levi was just a bit over protective towards her or was too concern for her, maybe those were the reasons why he was getting angry all of a sudden. But the way he spoke at her about Georges and his actions and the way he spoke, he couldn’t… he couldn’t be jealous is he?

Hanji shook her head hard and laughed a bit her sudden thought. Where did she get that from? She shouldn’t be thinking of something that couldn’t really happen and why would Levi be jealous in the first place? He doesn’t love her, does he? She perfectly knew that he fancies Petra and even assured that to Nanaba so she would quit asking about her new scent from the previous one, which was a combination of hers and Levi now which before, she has her own different scent. She actually wonders how her own scent smelled like.

She was perfectly sure about that conclusion of hers, that Levi does fancy Petra a lot. The way he looked at her everytime they’re together, how he admires her tea and how she slay titans like she doesn’t look like one who could actually kill one, and how they actually looked cute together.

She suddenly stopped on her steps when she thought about that. She is sure about that, nothing more. She did doesn’t know about Olou if he knows that but she too is aware that Olou really, really like Petra and was even very loud about it.

Just that. Period. He looked better with Petra, not with her, and she convinces herself about the truth of that.

But still, she suddenly lingered his touches and remembered how they make love during night time, how he leans in her kisses and how lose his self-inside of her. Despite the fact that they have agreed to keep it low and nothing serious regarding their sexual relationship, she felt suddenly that she can’t actually… lose all of it. In fact, she trembled as she thought of Levi no longer wanting her, no longer seeing her as a useful comrade.

But why would he want to only make love with her and no one else? What did it mean during their day times together, just like the recent when he sneaked around the stables just to tell her be careful and tell her how valuable she is for the Recon Corps, even more valuable than him? Just like the time inside her room where he suddenly grabbed her by the wrist, cuddled with her and then tucked her to sleep, what did it mean to him exactly? And why would he do such a thing if he only sees her as a comrade who he can set his manly urges upon with?

She slapped her forehead with some papers and shut her eyes.

Damn it, she never wanted to ever think about that, _again._ Ever.

It’s making her confused and didn’t want their relationship to just easily be gone all of a sudden.

Levi is a great and important part of her in all aspects of her life, from the very moment that they have known each other. And she had always vowed not to disappoint him, even if it would mean to make her sad.

 

**-x-**

The day had sucked because of what had happened inside Hanji’s laboratory. Despite his sudden flare, he hoped that he didn’t let himself gave a clue that he might actually be falling for her and that he is already being too possessive towards her. He didn’t want to lose her in an unexpected day but he still can’t find the truth within himself. He still feel confused if it’s really that awful feeling of _love_ is what he is feeling for her but no matter how much he denies it, he knew perfectly that he is _indeed_ already falling for her, and he can’t do anything to stop what he is feeling.

Whenever she’s around, his heart beats fast within his rib cage, making him acquire tiny bits of sweat on his forehead sometimes, finding himself more speechless in most desperate times that she is talking to him just like the other day when Hanji was asking about his secrecy of his that it’s too delicious and too hard to get over with and all he just did was to stare at her with dumbfounded eyes and she in return, looked at him with baffled eyes. He of course was not able to give her the answer that she’s longing for since it seemed like she was talking with some crazed guy and when he realized that he already looked like some kid staring in pure awe at some mascot, he turned around and made a fussing sound, hands tightly gripping his shirt. Just why in the world would he feel so nervous around her when he hugs he naked, enters her and kissing her everywhere where most people cannot do to their comrades?

He didn’t want to lose her for a wrong impression that he is already in pursuit of her affections but ironically, he can’t still say that he isn’t in a move of not pursuing her against Georges. He is fully aware of the guy’s intentions through his actions and willingness to be around Hanji all the time that he is always asking from Mike and the rest of his squad about Hanji. Having his eye twitch involuntarily without forcing it to do so is one of the signals that he doesn’t like it when some guy is around her, most especially Georges.

He tried to hide his feelings and thoughts about her away and if only he could bury it, he will do so but fuck it was just so hard. No matter how much he wanted not to think of her and focus on something else, he finds himself in a worse state of doubling his longing for her even more. Just by the moment he see her early in the morning, after taking breakfast with Georges and she would smile at him, his desire of forgetting her would already be blown away and get his old feelings back of what or how he should manage to keep his real feelings for her.

When she smiles at him, he would immediately walk away but he will smirk to himself, knowing that she was the first one who greets him and if she was the one to look at him for something she would need to ask, he would play hard to get so he can get to keep her company even longer and most of all, he will press his lips harder on hers if she sneaks a kiss and caress her skin when she hugs or touches him.

Unfortunately, recently, she hadn’t done any sneaky kiss or hug at him and is usually mentally absent when he’s around her, making him initiate some first moves on her which was one morning at the stables, waiting for her which was a success and cuddling and checking her reaction paper which greatly surprised her one evening before tucking her to sleep. In turn, he felt so happy that he almost got the horse that she used killed for throwing the poor creature too much food and was not able to sleep properly when he slept with her that night, finding himself busy caressing her from her shirt and the features of her face.

Then, things got a bit unexpected when she suddenly argued with him about Georges after seeing him hugging her which definitely made him shiver in anger and argue with her about being ‘respected’, as she tells him that he is not all high and mighty and shit and worse, that she threatened him that if he keeps his fucked up attitude to Georges, she will no longer talk to him. He first doubts that she can’t do and stand for the words she just thrown at him but knowing her, she always does whatever it is that she said and vowed. But the fact that she had said those words about someone who she barely knows, telling it to him who she really knows for years was a fucking pierce in the ears and jab on the chest.

Afterwards, he finds himself lurking in his own dark bedroom, sitting at the edge of his bed, staring at the towel that he kept from Hanji that night, the very towel he used to wipe her from the blood she shed because of his selfishness.

Looking at it made him realized how he longed for the feel of her lips on his, her burning touches that cause electric pulses on his skin making him alert all in a sudden and just simply smile at him, all just for him, a smile that he knows that she does only to him. He was always too anticipating in all aspects of her and now he realized that maybe he has gone too much. He wanted to apologize but if he did, it’s like he is already giving her up to Georges.

Dinner passed and he ate with his squad as he sat there physically present but mentally absent. He absently took a few spoonful of food, watch his squad talk and tease each other and calls it a night. He took a shower right immediately, staying there for more than his usual times of staying there.

Now that the fucking day is about to end, he wanted to sleep immediately but can’t find the feeling within him. Instead, he had her towel in his hands, the one that he used to wipe the blood she shed because of him. He had kept it and washed it, even if he couldn’t understand why he did such weird thing but he felt like it so he did.

He lay at his bed and placed his arm on his forehead, looking for the feeling of sleepiness to find him and kiss him to sleep but he is not even too tired to even feel asleep at all. He’s still attentive mind continued to be awaken when his door creaked open. He immediately stood by his elbows and placed Hanji’s towel under his pillows.

“It’s fucking late at nigh---“ he started but stop midway when he saw who it was.

Her eyes fell down on the figure on top of the bed. She felt a sudden tremble on her feet and need to find her balance by the door to keep her standing still.

“I’m sorry about---” she started and gulped down a lump on her throat hard, eyes looking down in humiliation. “About a while ago. I had gotten too much with my emotions.” She continued, searching for his face for an answer or even forgiveness from his eyes but found it a bit hard since he has always been too expressionless and shit.

Levi adjust himself on his bed, squirmed and untangled his legs from the blankets. He just stared at her for a couple of seconds and realizing that she hasn’t been forgiven she decided to go and sleep on her own room. “That’s all” she stated, turning around and held the door tightly open and placed her foot by the doorway, about to leave. “Sorry to bother you.”

When she thought that she could already leave the very room of Levi that is giving her the creeps, she was halted by a tight grip on her wrist. She turned her head to see the familiar blank grey eyes of Levi and tried to give another shot of pulling her wrist towards his direction.

He was standing still, pulling her from the wrist and when he finally succeeds of making her place a few steps inside the room, eyes filled with worry, he closes the door gently and locks it. She watched in a bit of fear since it only means one thing, now especially that he might want a request in order for him to accept her apology.

“Sit and take off your shoes.” He ordered and slightly pushed her on the bed and she sighed in disbelief. It’s not that she didn’t want to but she doesn’t feel like doing it tonight at all, and that sex is not the answer for forgiving and or accepting an apology.

Once her butt made contact with their soft mattress of his bed, she quickly fixed herself and eyed him carefully, eyes following his move as he too, went up on top of his bed, hands grabbed a hold on her slender waist with caution and pulled her lightly, very carefully as though he might break her rib cage if he didn’t. He didn’t want to scare her or make her tremble, but he intended to make her feel comfortable around him not just for sex but let her know that she can actually do other things with him as well.

Her back was pressed on Levi’s mighty chest and she could swear that she could feel his heart beating fast, but why? What is he up to anyway?

Slowly, his hands alternately massaged and rub her stomach lightly as he glued his face on her cheek. Hanji smiled, feeling the hot breath of Levi on her neck and cheek and she closed her eyes in contentment as he rubbed her stomach just the way she wanted him to do. She doesn’t know why he is doing something like that tonight but it’s making her feel a bit ticklish and warm at the bottom of her stomach, and she didn’t want him to stop. It’s not so often that Levi does a thing but just recently, he’s been acting a bit strange, getting all too cuddly on her and not doing sex or leading her into one.

She let out a chuckle and Levi smirked and gave her a warm kiss on the cheek. She wanted to feel his ever glorious hair so she bend her neck a little so she could slightly see him, and had her hand caress his hair as he tucked his face deeper to her shoulder line below her neck. They stayed absently like that for a while, Levi embracing her, caressing her abdomen as she gave his hair a few stroke and had her thumb and index finger form circles on top of his head, giving him relief that she is not calmed down and is alright that he is doing something like that to her.

“Something you wanted to talk about, Levi?”

He didn’t gave her an answer but he did tightened his hold onto her. He inhaled her scent and she only heard how his breathing deepened along her ear.

She sighed, he is really hopeless.

“You know,” she started, hoping to stir out any emotions from him and say something so she could go back to her room and sleep. “If you want _it,_ just say so.” She finished but did not looked at him. She’s not sure if what she had just said was right, since he doesn’t seemed like even asking for a single round tonight but she just, just wanted to know and be sure that he really doesn’t want.

A couple of minutes passed but he refused to say even a single word and Hanji only breathed normally as she could, removing all the tense and pressure within her body while Levi continued to do his caressing towards her.

“I just.... want you to stay, Hanji” he abruptly whispers onto her ear, causing her to widen her eyes in surprise and wonder. He never said that he wanted her to stay with him, not through words. He had always had a hard time expressing his thoughts, most especially his inner ones and even if she was the only person who he could talk with more personal and serious matter with, he still finds it hard to deliver his thoughts to her through words.

Usually, after they made out and they would pant so hard, he never leaves as quickly as her. If they are doing it on her room he won’t leave easily but when they do it on his room, she’ll get too anxious even if she’s already too tired after their love making and what the day has brought her to feel extremely tired, she’ll quickly stretch her arms and reach for her clothing on the floor. Levi would quickly drape an arm around her thin waist and hold at it as much as he can so she won’t go anywhere. By that, both of them knew that he wanted more time with her.

“But I still have something to do Levi.” Is what she would always say but he wouldn’t let go of her and she won’t be able to do anything about it. After the struggles and endless squirms under his locked arms on her waist, she would sigh in defeat and return back to bed with him and look at him questioningly. Sometimes, she would give him an annoyed look but if she is in the mood, she would tease him a lot until the both of them adjust themselves to where they are most comfortable with and sleep. He loved how she tickles him unaware when she combs his hair with her fingers when he lays on top of her or when she leans on his embraces and feel her head by his beating heart as he scrubs her back lightly and she would play her fingers on his chest.

But right now, the scene is different than they usually have and he is unsure to himself what he could be doing right now to her is enough to make her understand that he wants her to be with him tonight, regardless if there would be sex or not and about what had happened earlier the day between them.

He tightened his embrace on her and rubbed his cheek very slowly on her shoulder and shut his eyes tight. Even if he knew that she would refuse, he is still hoping that she would that she wanted to.

What he doesn’t know was she smiled under his strong grasp and traced his forearm as light as a feather that made him open his eyes and search her face. She smiled at him and he melted, it was just astonishing. He can’t help but smirk even if he is not sure of her possible answer for him.

“I will, if you tell me why first” she dared, eyes teasing him.

His eyes turned to her but soften when he didn’t answered again. What should he tell her? That he wanted her for himself and makes him feel like he wanted to cut the head of Georges when she’s around him and that she should only be extra cuddly with him and nobody else? Fuck with that. He would rather sex her up all night or just embrace her with his might and won’t let go until the morning sun rises but he can’t say that. If she finds out that he is feeling for her is starting to get worse and higher than a fuck buddy, he might lose her.

No, he will surely lose her. She looks like she’s already having a liking with that Georges and if he blurts out his feelings for her, she might not like it and cut their ‘relationship’ all of a sudden, and he can’t take that, not now. Not now that he longs for her even more, not now that he feels like he needs her every now and then, to touch her and feel her warmth, hear her laugh that will instantly remove all of his bad vibes away, not now that he thinks he is falling for her, hard.

He shivered. He never knew that he could feel such feeling of serenity and alien feeling that he never felt to anyone before was possible to happen at this very moment. Now that it is happening, he can’t seem to let go of it.

He heard her sighed and he returned back to reality and he panicked in the inside. “You sure are impossible Levi” she whimpered and turned to look at him before crawling towards his pillows. He looked surprised but his eyes didn’t wander anywhere else, only to her moving figure.

“I’ll stay here alright, even if you won’t tell me why. So come here.” She stretched out her arms after making herself comfortable on his pillows and stared at him. She smiled lightly and even moved her fingers to come and join her there. She no longer cared of his reasons because remembering how she bust through his door when she needs him and just hug him there without telling what the reason was after asking her a few times what had happened, he would just caress her and make her feel welcome and comforted even without telling him the real reason why she is asking like shit. So this time around, she wanted to return the same feeling of comfort that he needs even if he doesn’t tell her why, grateful for those times that she had done the same.

She was happy when he smirked and crawled on top of her and placed his head below her chin. She locked him in a soft embrace and rushed her hands over his back to caress it. She smiled, he is like a huge baby on top of her who wanted to be comforted tonight.

No matter, he is her friend and there will be no way for her to allow him to go to sleep with a troubled mind. If this is the only way he could relax, then fine she will give it to him. They have shared all sorts of things together and this light one is not an exception.

She had always cared for him, and wanted him to have the best in the world, no matter what it could be.

 

**-x-**

Hanji woke up not seeing Levi’s face beside hers but felt something heavy on her stomach. When she reached down to touch what it was, she felt a familiar hair and soft skin.

It was Levi, head settled perfectly on her abdomen, one hand on her waist, gripping on her shirt. She smiled, the look and feeling was so cute and waking up having his head on her stomach was really a new feeling of contentment and giddy happiness for her. She hoped she could wake up like this again, it was just tantalizing. Most of the time, if they fall asleep on each other, they would find themselves in each other’s embrace, not in the other’s stomach. But it was too sweet to even ask him to move away.

All she could do was just look at how he settles his head on her stomach and feel the new odd feeling of serenity that she is getting from a simple thing that he is doing, in just simply resting his head there. When he moved and groaned and opened his eyes, he pulled his head away a bit but placed it there back again and embraced her from there. She gasped and then chuckled to herself.

“You look like you’re awake, shitty glasses.” He said without taking his head off her abdomen. He feels partly embarrassed that’s why he can’t meet her gaze. It was his first time to ask something like this from her and she abides so willingly.

“Hmm, yeah. But I still want to lay down a bit more.” She mumbles and continued to grasp and play on his hair.

Levi smiled on his embrace. He has her now and hoped she won’t be gone away from him for the rest of the day. It was raining outside and the coldness that it brought is too perfect for this scenario, perfect cuddle weather.

Levi was very pleased of having Hanji stayed extra long inside his room early in the morning, perfect for cuddle weather. He loved how her stomach goes up and down on his nose and would give it light kisses, appreciating her firm stomach. He wouldn’t deny that he does memorize her body in every inch of it but he never gets tired of it, even to her mind and her presence. He loves being with her and he just wished the time could stop so she wouldn’t worry about work but just the two of them, it would be pretty nice. 

“No drills today or cleaning outside. No practices and other shit to be done.” Levi says as Hanji listens. “So you better stay here.” He cleared out.

“But I still have to finish something.” She said softly and tucked a hair into her ear.

Levi gritted his teeth. He is always in against work for her attention. Somehow, he wished he _is_ her duty to finish and focus with for the entire day. He smirked, he would like that. If only she doesn’t have to work hard to eliminate the titans. Her research is always an important part of the Corps and they would do everything to help her out. If only there are no titans to focus with, maybe things would be a little better for them both.

“How about I just stay here for one more hour then I’ll go?” she asked, finding a way to attend to his desires as well.

“No. Make it two and a half. There are less works for you today outside and you can surely adjust your time and work well for whatever it is that you need to finish inside your lab.”

Hanji pouted. She did said that she liked what she is feeling right now and she can’t just leave it all away, most especially that the weather is perfect for cuddling. The way he groggily nuzzle his nose unto the skin of her stomach made her hold her moan but had her fingers caress him for appreciation for his killing affectionate little actions.

“Two hours. Moblit will get worried once he finds out that I am not in my room and look for me everywhere.”

“I don’t give a fuck about that. It’s his job to get worried all over you anyway.”

“But I hav---“

She stopped when she felt the lips of Levi travelling along the skin of her stomach, tracing it, licking it and then kissing it again afterwards. He knew that it always drives her crazy when he kisses her in the middle of her stomach as he also wordlessly expressed to her what she’s going to miss after leaving him in such great weather.

“Fine. Seems like I can’t do anything about it. Two hours is okay.” _Better than nothing,_ he thought.

Hanji smiled and tucked his head deeper into her stomach. “Thank you, Levi” she whispers before shutting her eyes to sleep.

Thinking how funny it is, realizing that it was only Levi who she could feel happy and content with this kind of thing.

 

**-x-**

 

%MCEPASTEBIN%


	8. Want to Stay Right Here

**Chapter 8:**

**Want to Stay Right Here**

**-x-**

Levi had been extra careful with his actions and words after the misunderstandings and arguments that he had with Hanji. He is never fond of arguing with her about irrelevant things (and yes he find Georges as a very irrelevant ass) and still intended to continue showing off a bit more advance acts about his feelings to her but unfortunately, Moblit and Georges were up to do give her assisting services and other shits so he is up to do nothing but continue being himself. Aside from prolonging his kisses and embraces with her (which he had been doing right after Georges had been a part of the Recon Corps and he had decided to show a few advancements towards her), he would also caress her hand if they are together and learnt how to sneak kisses when they are alone, pulling her on a very dark alley and if she is in the mood, they will have a quickie bonus which he can’t say no to.

Just two days ago, Hanji had been told by Erwin that she needed to finish her new assignment early so she would have the budget needed for it, covering all expenses from the testing, experiments, materials and up to its productions. She was delighted when she was told about this but she would only have a good three days for her to work on it so Erwin could process it to the supreme commander and be used for their upcoming mission for the month, which would be a day after the submission of her work. She knows that it’ll be impossible for them to use her plans for the mission right immediately but as long as she could get the needed budget, it would be better.

The assignment that she is need to finish in such a hurry are the tools and traps that she had longed proposed before that would lure away titans and would help preserve the number of soldiers and lessen the death. One of the things she had proposed were explosives that could let out very thick smokes, bigger nets full of sharp knives, use of bigger chains and bigger bow and arrow that would even need a number of wheels so they could move it and a whole lot more bright ideas that goes with stickiness to stop the titans from running away or to make their way slippery by some kind of liquid if poured onto their paths. Those plans of her would need a huge amount of money and she wanted to try and test them immediately so they could use it for the nearest mission that they are about to have, which is also within the week, right after her submission deadline.

This has caused her to sleep very late and even disregard her daily meals. She immediately lose weight and even Moblit couldn’t do anything about it. Georges was able to persuade her eat but she wouldn’t be able to finish her food in any way too. Levi in turn would always tell her that she is overworking herself too much again but she would disregard his comments. She’s back to her typical working hard-busy phase and she can’t even talk in the middle of her work. Levi would visit her but won’t be able to entertain him just like how she can’t talk much to Georges nor let Georges help her as well, no time for telling him what to do and only Moblit knows what to when times like this so he decided to give her some space and time as well.

She was stressed but she wanted to perfect her plans and to be of greater help for everyone, most especially to her Legion. Her tools would also be a great help for her to capture more titans to study with so she is too much in the mood.

It was no doubt that she had gotten ill in the middle of her work but she was able to finish her proposal. Unfortunately, she was able to finish it a few hours after her deadline and when she was shoving it on Erwin’s thick eyebrows, all he could tell her had made her heart broken.

“Hanji, I can’t accept that anymore. You know that it was due earlier the day and it’s in the middle of the afternoon already and I am going to have my meeting with the supreme commander and the higher ups for the budget.” He tells her.

“At least get to read it while having the meeting, please Erwin? MY report and proposals won’t let you down and you know that right?” she fought back, waving the pile of papers and sketches on his face.

“You know I can’t do that, I need to focus on what’s more important and to what we are discussing about. Has this been tested by the way?”

“No, I will need the budget to make sure they will work well.” She said in a weird voice, her nose blocked and she coughed. “Please consider this one Erwin.”

“Then how could I tell them that this will work a hundred percent if you hadn’t tested them yet? You know the drills about this Hanji right?”

“I know Erwin but I know they will work and like you said, we are running out of budget again and I don’t have time before the mission and it’s submission so I don’t have much time to do and test them all out.” She argues and sneezes. She has been having a hard time to breathe, not sure if it’s about her failing project proposal or her sneezing.

“Look, I can’t do anything about this anymore. Wait until the next meeting about the budget allocations to have your desired budget for your project. I can’t just push this is without knowing that they will a hundred percent work well, the council will just disapprove and would be hard to persuade.” Erwin sighed and returned the papers on her hand.

Hanji bit her lips and pursed them really hard, the right part twitching involuntarily and she stopped the possible sob that would have escaped her lips if she didn’t hold them back. Her eyes dropped on the ground and stare don her boots.

“I understand.” She whispers and saluted to her commander and went away.

She straightly went to her room and threw the papers on the table and threw her body on the bed. She didn’t know how long she had her face flat on the bed when a knock came on her door and she told them to enter, which was Georges.

“Buntaichou, are you okay?”

“No.” she carelessly said.

“What happened?”

“I don’t want to talk about it Georges.” She said not meeting his eyes, not even moving her face on the bed.

“I see.” And he closes the door. Not long after, he came back with a tray of food for her. She stood up by the smell of the soup and realizes how hungry she was already.

Georges watched her eat and when he touched her hand to kiss her goodbye and carry her now finished food outside, he realized that she was burning with fever. He instantly grabbed a towel and had it dipped on a bowl of water, placing the wet towel on her forehead and pushed her towards the pillows.

“Buntaichou, you are ill. Please rest.”

“I am okay Georges, I can pull this through. Tomorrow I’ll be alright” she reassures him and he smiles.

“Of course, my buntaichou is strong.” He told her and kissed her hand and went towards the door.

“I’ll be seeing you tomorrow, buntaichou.” He bid and went away.

Hanji smiled at him and nodded in agreement. She sighed, she could feel her body getting worse than she had anticipated. She really wanted to join the mission tomorrow, even if her booby traps were not yet included for the mission to be used. She didn’t want to miss all the fun and there won’t be any other way for her not to see any interesting titan to start thinking of new approaches on her experiments. It’ll be a total blow if there’s a unique and different kind of titan out there and she didn’t had the opportunity to see it.

Her glasses were still on her face but as she focuses her gaze on the ceiling, she could clearly feel and see that her world in turning on its own and is quite unstoppable. She groaned, her body is heating up and she can’t stop it as well even her throat feels like loaded with thorns. Her tummy feels weird as well, hard and still full after a few hours of finishing her little amount of food. After she tried getting herself some sleep which she can’t do because she is really feeling painful all over, her door opened a little as it emitted a squeaky sound.

It was Levi. He took a tiny glimpse first before he lets himself enter her room entirely. On his hand was a candle lamp, which she presumes that he must be doing his late night duties.

“You look like shit Hanji” he grumbled and placed the candle lamp on her bedside table.

“That’s why I am your shitty glasses.” She joked around but it wasn’t enough to hide what she is truly feeling.

Levi could perfectly see how her smile was weak and forced. Her forehead was glistening with sweat and he automatically felt that there is something wrong with her. He wordlessly approached her and places his palm on her cheek and he flinched.

She was fucking burning.

He gritted his teeth in irritation and took the towel on her forehead, dumped it on the bowl of water beside her on her table and places it on her forehead. He tried to pull her and fix her on her place but she suddenly felt her stomach gurgling and moving differently and places a hand to feel it. The moment Levi places a hand on her back to assist her as she fixes herself, hot and odd smelling liquid escaped from her mouth directly from her stomach and she had it all over Levi.

Her eyes grew with what she had done and Levi froze in an instant, staring at her with even bigger eyes. They stared at each other without saying any word but then she felt like she had more to throw up. She guesses that she was right because she had too much to throw up that some even exited out of her nostrils and the feeling was so unpleasant. Levi had helped her and didn’t seemed to care even if she threw more up on him as he pats her back slowly and pushed her bangs out of her face.

“You done?” he asked when she stops and calms down. She nodded and he instantly scooped her up into his arms and hid her face on his shirt in embarrassment. She awfully looked disgusting and smelled like sour shit all over and Levi wasn’t still complaining or saying anything harsh to her, but he does looked somewhat disapproved of some sort.

When he places her down on the ground inside the bathroom, she shivered as her feet made contact on the cold ground and almost lost her footing since she still feels dizzy but managed to grab on Levi to balance herself. Without a second, her clothes were removed and another towel made contact on her skin. It was cold but tolerable then replaced by a soap and then rinsed by some mild water and dried off by her towel. He was too determine dot have her clean yet he moved with gentleness. It was a good thing that he knows her body well since he knows where she is sensitive to be touched.

Levi had scrubbed her body thoroughly to remove the entire stink and stain on her. He took a set of new and clean clothes for her. As she wore it, he took the bedsheets off her bed and changed all the linens and sheets. He was right on time when he finished, she was already done, peaking out of the bathrrom door.

“Levi?” she asked out.

Without breaking the eye contacts, he removed his filthy shirt, threw it away with the rest of the nasty smelling clothes and sheets, even his pants and carried her again on her bed. She was surprised of what he had done and stared in question.

“Shut up.” He told her as she was about to open her mouth and ask him. “I need to remove my nasty clothes so the stink and the mess won’t come on you again.”

“Oh.” Having her back on the soft matters of her bed and her pillows that he had arranged a bit elevated than usual so it could help her feel a little better. She watches as he washes himself with another towel dumped on a clean water and wore a new set clothes (they both keep a set of clothes on each other’s bedroom for emergency purposes since she has some time of scratching his clothes to pieces as he too at times tears off her clothes like some desperate wolf) that he pulls out of her closet.

“Hey, don’t” she said and stretched her arms weakly at him when she realizes that he was intending to wash off their dirty clothes and bedsheets and sat back.

“We’re still early tomorrow Levi, you won’t be able to get some sleep.” The amusement on her voice was gone and was filled with worry. She watches him clean her off with amusement, wondering how he has such strong stomach cleaning her puke, being a great friend but thought that maybe he was just a clean-everything-type of person so she shrugged it off.

“ _I’m_ early tomorrow, not you. Erwin will know about this.”

“But---“

“Shut up.”

She shuts her lips and looked down on her hands.

“I’m sorry, but I really can go you know? I’ll be fine tomorrow morning before you even knew it.” She tells without meeting his eyes.

“No you don’t. Did you just see yourself Hanji? You’ll just get more horrible fucking dizzy and puke at all the fucking titans that you’ll face and have the squad worried and unfocused, do you even realized that?” he said as he finished folding his sleeves and gripped on the sheets a bit tightly. He had witnessed her a thousand times being ill and he knows perfectly when she can really do it or not.

He came to her when she didn’t said anything back and had her head droop. He sighed, knowing she feels bad about a lot of things.

“I’m sorry Levi.” She sighed and all he could do was tug his hand on her fallen hair lightly pulls her head into his body.

“It’s not that you’ll be the reason for the possible deaths on the squad if you join but you might die out there if you join tomorrow. No medicine and you’re not in a good condition for fuck’s sake!” he said and she gripped on his shirt.

“Look, just get rest and get your health back. Don’t go to tomorrow’s mission, I’ll tell Moblit to stay and look after you and I’ll talk to Erwin, got it?” he asked and pulls her chin to meet his gaze.

She smiled weakly and nodded.

“And I don’t want you to mind me; I just need to see you resting first so I can rest as well.”

“Okay, but on one condition.” He raises a brow when she mentioned that.

“What is it?” he asked, stiffing suddenly from what she had said.

“I’ll have Nifa stay with me here instead of Moblit. I’ll need him to do something for me on the field during the mission, will that be alright for you?”

Levi smirked as he looked down at her as her eyes goggled asking for confirmation, her eyes looking absolutely beautiful as always even if she is not in a good condition.

“I don’t mind about that. I’ll tell him to come here early in the morning tomorrow as well as Nifa. I’ll ask a doctor to come as well so we would know what you need to do to get back your health and you can instruct Moblit of what he needs to do. We clear on that four eyes?”

Hanji giggled and nodded. He helped her fix herself and dumped a wet cloth on her forehead. Surprisingly when she yawn, he took her hand and didn’t let go of it.

“I need to make sure you sleep first.” He tells her without meeting her gaze. Her eyes grew with bewilderment then softened on his kindness.

“I don’t mind, as long as you give me a quick kiss first?” she teased. “I cleaned my mouth and my nose, don’t worry.” All she got was a snort and she giggled again.

“You won’t get sick because of that, you’ll need two liters of saliva before you even get the illness that I have and that it is not the easiest way to transmit colds too.” She reassures him and he stared at her with a death stare.

She shrugged and closes her eyes in defeat, not uttering another word.

“I don’t buy it. But I don’t care, what’s the use of gaining the title World’s Strongest if I could easily get sick anyway?” her eyes open with his remark and then immediately felt his lips on hers, making her smile joyfully.

“There you go so you get your ass together and go to sleep now.” She giggled at first but after a few minutes feeling her cold hand, she drifted into sleep right away.

 

**-x-**

 

Moblit was the very first one who Hanji saw coming inside of her room having Nifa in tow and began to look worried the moment they saw her very pale on her bed.

“Hey you guys” she mumbled and Moblit immediately went out to get some food as he said as he got out of the room. But he was halted midway when Levi arrived with some food for Hanji and a doctor behind him. Moblit snatched the tray of soup and bread and a glass of water and places it on her bedside table.

Levi insisted that the doctor should better look at her first before she starts instructing Moblit for the mission. They watched as the doctor looks at her, touch her skin and measure her temperature and mumbles a few things. He asked a few questions to her and he took some bottled medicines and wrote to a piece of paper.

“You got overworked squad leader Hanji” the doctor tells her as the other three look at them. “You’re over fatigued and would need a huge amount of rest. You also need to hydrate since you have mentioned that your bowel was a bit in an irregular schedule than usual and that you’re having a hard time right?”

“Yes doc” she agrees.

“Vomiting hard and your irregular bowels which is diarrhea had caused you to be dehydrated right immediately, most especially you must have been ignoring to drink water lately. So just eat those that I have written on a piece of paper so you would immediately regain your health back.” He tells her and eyes the other three. The two blondes were staring at the doctor and agreeing on what he is saying while the raven haired man was staring at Hanji.

“Just rest, drink water and eat those food that I have written on the paper. Take your medicine every eight hours too.” The doctor said as he started to fix his things back to his bag.

“Just remember this squad leader Hanji” he added even before he decided to go entirely. “You cannot help save mankind if you don’t have a good health.” Nifa took a seat beside Hanji and read the paper that the doctor had handed over her and was then taken by Levi from her grasp and read it.

“Stay healthy!” the doctor shouted and closes the door behind him.

“Apple, water and some rice, bread, oats or anything that’s light carbohydrates, why would he even ask you to eat this?” he asked.

“Apple is good enough to eliminate the cough and colds that I have, good source of vitamin C, water for rehydration and rice or any light carbohydrates for energy.” She explains to him before calling Moblit.

“Nifa, you can get these stuffs for her right?” Levi asked as he looked at Hanji who was busy giving instructions on Moblit.

“Yes heichou.” Levi nodded in agreement and was thankful enough that he can leave Hanji with her and would’ve been taken care of.

“Moblit.” He calls out and the two pair of eyes looked at Levi’s direction. “Once you’re done talking to four eyes there, we better head to Erwin. He won’t want us to be late. Mike’s squad was a bit early and we have no choice but to be early as well.” Moblit agrees and after a few minutes of conversation, he tells Levi that he is ready to go.

Nifa went out on the town market to get some things for Hanji and went along Moblit as he exited the room. Nifa and Moblit were both surprised that Levi didn’t join them going out.

“Guess he will talk to her for a while.” Nifa told Moblit who seemed confused all of a sudden and headed straight towards Erwin.

“How are you feeling?” Levi asked and dumps the towel on the bowl of water again before placing it on her head.

“Still the same I guess” she let out an uncomfortable cough and closes her eyes with the pain that she felt that slashed on her throat when she coughed. “I really wanted to come with you guys.”

“Tch. Just stay here and rest. Don’t shit out and don’t give Nifa a terrible time.” He tells her as he fixes her bed a bit, fixing her pillows and removing the dust on them.

“I’ll be okay” she reassured him and smiled a little.

“You should be.” He snorted back and scrubs her scalp a bit before he turned his feet towards the door.

Hanji held out a hand and held his, locking her droopy eyes at his. She flashed him a lazy smile and he started to walk on his steps when he saw her about to shut her eyes close. She let his hand slipped off hers, but he didn’t let her go that easily. She felt his palm and fingertips ran on hers slowly and it let out a very serene sweet feeling on her part and can’t help but wonder if does the same to him. She had always loved his hand that does her lots of wonderful things. The affection that they both felt on each other’s touch had made them both feel alive and wanted to stay longer with each other but can’t do so.

Levi didn’t released her fingertips that easily before he went on his way, giving those little digits of hers one last soft squeeze then went towards the door. He could feel his feet becoming heavier by every step, believing that she needs him and wanted to stay instead and watch her recover before her eyes. He knows that she wouldn’t want that and he has a mission, an endless fucking mission to finish off with.

If only he could have himself excused, only just this once because he knows that she needs him more than the squad, they have each other anyway but Hanji only has Nifa for her to stay with, no else. He sighed and went out of the door without looking back at her to lessen the agonizing feeling that he is having.

No other reply was made when she drifted off to sleep right immediately, Levi smiling at her peaceful resting form. She needs to rest and get back to perfect shape, and she seemed like she is doing it right now and he can’t be more than happy about that.

As he walked on the corridor, he regretted that he didn’t kissed her forehead instead.

That fucking touch of hers will surely haunt him throughout their mission.

 

**-x-**

Levi thought of wanting to talk to Erwin in private the moment they had set foot outside their home walls. It’s a good thing they are only to do their monthly additional food gathering outside the walls to help reduce the food shortage that their people are experiencing and Levi knows the perfect time is still at night since Erwin would be too busy commanding the entire legion to get out of the titans. He did his usual job, making sure that there would be less casualties and less deaths that could probably happen in a flash.

They had took refuge at night time on the castle where they usually go to at nights of their expeditions and did do his duty of making sure that all the soldiers are sleeping and he will keep watch. He then took the way towards the room destined to be Erwin’s office within the castle premises and opens the door. Erwin was used having no knocks at all from Levi so it wasn’t a surprise when he entered without a knock being heard. What was surprising was what he had said.

“Hey Old Man I need to talk to you.” Erwin’s eyed gazed at him questioningly. Somehow, he doesn’t looked annoyed and looked relaxed as he stared up from the papers that he is holding.

“What is it?” Erwin asked.

“Hanji is not here.”

“I know, Moblit mentioned it to me earlier the day.” He recalls. Levi was a bit late reaching Erwin and didn’t had the chance to talk to him about her at all. He shrugged as he felt totally unreliable when he promised Hanji that he will tell everything to Erwin.

“Yeah I know, I should be the one telling that to you actually and I want you to know that you should be more aware of your soldiers capability and not pushing them to their limits, Erwin.” Levi kept his tone intact and calm as possible.

“What are you trying to say?” Erwin thought things even clearer and wondered if what he is saying is related to Hanji.

“Is this about Hanji?” he can’t help but asked since he know how the two were inseparable when together and how close they are.

Levi didn’t answered and Erwin didn’t missed a beat.

“Are you implying that I am the reason why she isn’t here?” he asked, trying not to sound accusingly.

“She’s ill Erwin. The doctor had said that she got over worked, ring any bells?”

“She got overworked because of what she is in need to do so don’t accuse me just like that. What she is doing is for the sake of our fellow soldiers and of humanity, I believe that is not very selfish either.”

“I am not accusing you or telling you that you’re being selfish of some shit, I am telling you to be more aware of your soldiers and she is not just your soldier, she is a comrade of ours and I know that you should’ve been more aware of her limitations as well.”

“You should know that she needed to rush her work since it is the only way to have it fully supported right immediately and be able to put into good use Levi.” Erwin was pretty damn great in handling his anger like the usual and has been doing well in hiding the flames of anger tonight. He does not want to have any arguments tonight, most especially not with Levi.

“But you do know that she won’t be able to make it on time so why push her to finish it? Look what had happened to her. She barely slept and didn’t even ate for days just to finish that fucking booby traps that you wanted her to finish. She would need budget to get it tested and you know fucking well that the following day of her deadline is the mission, how do you think you can even produce those shitty traps that she had taught off anyway? To top it all off, you didn’t even dared to read it!”

Levi was fuming but he too was trying to keep his voice in bearable pitch enough only for the two of them to hear. He won’t want to hear any nasty gossips again about him and Erwin. On the other hand, the blonde commander just stared at him as he reflect on his comrade’s words.

“She’s fucking vomiting her guts out and dizzy as hell. She doesn’t even know how to take care of herself Erwin, I hope you know what you brought her into.” He turned his direction towards the door and left. Not even a word was uttered from the two of them as he goes on his way.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -x-
> 
> I think it’s necessary for me to cut it here and had the rest for the next chapter instead.  
> Anwyay, see yah in the next chapter.


	9. We Get Along When I’m Inside You

**Chapter 9:**

**We Get Along When I’m Inside You**

 

 

**-x-**

Hanji had made a huge progress with her recovery, all thanks to Nifa’s strict vegetable and fruit diet and some alternate bread servings. The food that she ate for two days were completely light so she no longer needed to puke again and was nutritious at the same time. The vitamins and medicine helped her greatly and most especially the apple. She even drank tons of water and thought that she might even drown on it and die, she had never thought that she could drink water that crazily.

The moment that her fellow soldiers went out for their mission two days ago, she had instantly drove off into sleep and Nifa started pushing food inside her throat. She couldn’t blame her though, she could see the concern of her subordinate in her eyes and she felt guilty that she too would need to stay within the headquarters and watch over her instead of extending her help for the Corps.

Her fever had greatly subsided after the first night together with Nifa, her coughs had lessened and her nose had cleared almost entirely already. The moment she no longer felt any dizziness coming to her, she insisted to work on her papers, improving her ideas with her recent project proposals, fix and remove a few things and even prepared a few visual aids for her to be very ready and prepared once she is asked to discuss it on a panel. It was not an easy thing to do since Nifa won’t stop stopping her in doing so but she reassures her that she is fine and promised to take a break every after two hours.

In the middle of their second day together, Nifa had suddenly started telling her a surprising story all of a sudden.

“Heichou washed all of your clothes and bed sheets.” She tells her surprisingly.

“How did you know?” Hanji eyed her questioningly.

“He asked me to fold them after having them dry outside, I just forgot to mention it to you yesterday squad leader.” She took an apple from her bedside and took a knife to chop it down. “he really does care a lot about you squad leader.”

Hanji’s cheek brightened with pink. She bit her lip and stared on the book she is reading. “Well, we had been comrades for almost five years now, no doubt he cares that much.”

In truth, she doesn’t have any idea of how caring he could be. She had never expect him to be so blunt yet caring, and most importantly, he cared beyond that of being just a comrade or a friend and sometimes, it even frightens her a lot.

“I didn’t know he washed them.” She murmured and thought that he might have washed them at the very same night that she had vomited on him since he left the following morning, there’s no way he could have washed them early in the morning before he left. No matter what time he had washed them, she realized that he absolutely had a few hours to have some sleep before the mission. Levi did really sacrifice for her sake.

Normally for usual mission like this, they only take two days and this day is supposed to be the day that they should all return. Now that she gazes on her window, she had taken up the breakfast that Nifa had prepared for her (even if she insisted in going to the headquarters’ cafeteria instead to eat) since she knows that the food she will prepare for her superior is what she specifically needed. Hanji didn’t want to waste her effort so she indulge in instead. She had also took a bath after days of not bathing herself since she needed to sweat out like hell so the heat of her body will drop faster.

It was almost lunch time when they arrived and Hanji had taken her lunch with her squad, anxious to hear how their mission was and to hear all about Moblit’s report in the field. Afterwards, she had reported Erwin about her improvements on her report assignment that he had previously neglected, telling her that it was already late but this time, he didn’t utter a word, took the thick compilation of papers from her hand and went to his office.

“I’ll take a look on this Hanji, you go continue having your rest. You have already done enough. I’ll tell you my feedback on this one soon.” He tells her and eyed her carefully. Hanji nodded and stared at him, wondering why he looked a bit bothered seeing her.

She shrugged and went off to see Georges who had just dismissed himself from his squad and was carrying a few flowers on his hand. He was very much delighted to see her back to her normal self.

“Buntaichou!” he yelled out and embraced her and even lifted her. “you are already well buntaichou!” he continued to yell out while the flowers on his hand miraculously didn’t die from his tight grip and for hugging her.

“Yes I am Georges, I am glad to see you alive and whole.” She beamed and her smile even widened when he stretch out his hand and gave her the flowers.

“Thank you!” she tells him and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. She smelled the flowers and tugged them on her chest. “They are beautiful Georges, and smelled really good!”

Georges laughed to himself awkwardly and blushed. “Anything for you buntaichou. I am sorry I haven’t brought anything new to study.”

“That’s okay, it really is hard to look around for new specimen of plants and flowers with a very limited time when out on a mission.” She reassured him and coughed a little.

“You should still be taking a rest buntaichou, it is unwise for you to tire yourself only after a few days.” He gently pats her shoulder.

“I’m okay but I guess you’re right. Maybe just a little more and tomorrow, I might be busy again.” she smiled at him and he nodded in agreement. In turn, she have a very sneaky idea on her mind.

She knows about the basic drills every after mission, cleaning and feeding the horses, round check and count off to know how many had died and who they are and to make reports about their mission and help out in disseminating the food that they have gathered on the market.

Hanji made a dash to go back to her room, fixes the flowers that Georges had brought for her and had made an exquisite smell to counter back the awful and stinky smell that she had emitted when she was ill. She had also took a seat and quickly reading and analysis on Moblit’s report so she would know what they needed to talk about the following day. It was good thing Nifa was no longer to hover on her and telling her to sleep or rest instead of drowning herself with work.

Late afternoon arrives and she went out from her room and motioned herself to go to another familiar room. She knows where the hidden key is and successfully opened the door and was dazzled to see that the room remained clean and organized after days of being untouched.

Knowing him, he would have finish first all the other necessary things needed to be done every after mission and he might still be out there, helping out with the distribution of food and making sure they reach the markets and not the local homes of those who have money and buy them privately from a soldier. He might also feed and clean his horse first as gratitude for keeping him alive after a fight with the titans and know the other details of their mission so he would know how many of his men had sacrificed themselves and silently thank them.

Hanji won’t deny that she did felt tired a bit after having a quick rundown on Moblit’s report, realizing how her body is still recovering. She realized that kind of fatigue that hit her was no ordinary and that she should be more careful next time if she wanted to stay away from those horrible times she had it. She took the opportunity of waiting for him to rest on his bed and shut her eyes.

After an hour or less passed, she heard those familiar footsteps coming nearer on the room and excitedly threw her arms open for the very person she had anticipated the days once he had opened the door.

“LEVI!” she squealed noisily and curls her arms all over him. “Levi! Levi! Levi! Levi! Levi!” she repetead his name all over and over again with joy as she jumps excitedly on his embrace.

The feeling of happiness and excitement that had immediately came too when he returns the squeeze was washed away by worry and concerned when he felt that she got thinner and definitely lost weight. He could feel her ribcage beneath her skin and her body felt smaller on his embraced. He can’t focus on the warmth that she is emitting but he did managed not to ask, it’s obvious that her illness was the reason why she had lost weight.

“How was the mission? Did you get hurt? I was so worried!” she tells him when she pulls a bit away to search his face, excited and just too jolly, pulling him away from his deep thoughts and suddenly found himself staring to those still glorious brown orbs of hers. The light and energy was not removed on her eyes fortunately, compared to her weight and body.

Levi just stared at her blankly then pats her head when she hugged him again with a huge grin on her face. “Levi’s smell! I miss your smell Levi!” she squealed as she nuzzled her nose on his cheek and neck making him tense all of a sudden, feeling conscious all of a sudden that he might smell like some horse or titan shit.

“I miss you so much!” she giggles and he let one hand caress her cheek, his thumb softly massaging her delicate skin as he stares at her deep in her eyes, forgetting the thought of his fugly smell. He could clearly see how happy she is and it does the same effect on him.

He had never experienced that, having someone too happy to see him back since he is usually being feared, people will only give him a nervous nod. But having able to feel that was just insanely great and warming.

When they completely pulled apart from one another, he held scooped her up and she eagerly places her hands around his neck and went towards his bed. Hanji loved every bit of it, smelling his usual smell and then being carried around like a baby and carefully being tucked into his arms. She just can’t stop giggling and decided to bury and nuzzle her face on his chest for feeling shy all of a sudden. He is spoiling her too much already and she can’t help herself but love every single bit of it, instead of asking him to stop.

He stared onto her beaming eyes as he walked towards his bed and places her in the middle carefully, not breaking their eye contact. When he finally joins her, she threw herself on top of him after he removes his boots and slumped himself on the bed, hands on the back of his head letting her nuzzle on top of him.

“Did you get me any souvenir? Georges brought me some souvenir and I loved it!” she exclaimed as she rested her chin on his chest. “They were a bunch of flowers but he seemed to be looking for some new species of flowers so he apologized that he got me the same usual ones but it was fine, they were really beautiful.” She smiled after she said it to him and absently stared on his shirt as she recalled the cute look on Georges’ face.

He snorted and looked away, it annoys him seeing how she absently recalls whatever the fuck it could be regarding that asshole and he didn’t want to know.

“Hey Levi?”

He looked down towards her and meets her gaze. She smiled, pure of sincerity and cheerfulness.

“Thank you.” She mumbles and she just looked so cute, her eyes dazzling and sparkling as the now disappearing sun rays are the reason why they look like some precious gem. He felt his cheek grew warmer than usual and looked away.

“I didn’t brought you any shitty souvenir and yet you’re fucking thanking me. And for fuck’s sake I didn’t had bath the moment I went on with the mission so get away from me.” He said since he just sniff on her and she smelled like lavenders. He figured she took a bath already and he was happy about that.

She giggled and crawled on top of him and had him cornered under her. She gently kisses his forehead and stared onto his deep grey eyes.

“I want to say thank you for taking care of me.” She whispers and nuzzled on his neck. He wanted to strangle her to stop nuzzling on his neck since it is definitely killing him with lust.

“Thank Nifa not me. I didn’t do shit.”

“So what do you call about what you did with my bed sheets and clothes that I threw up on with? Take note, you were not even able to sleep because of that and that is the very night before your mission without me right?” she started and he still can’t meet her eyes. “Calling the doctor? Making sure that Nifa looks after me? Explaining it to Erwin yourself? Watching over my squad during the mission?”

Levi gritted his teeth and balled his fist on his hair. He swears that he would pull all of his hair away from his scalp if she continues like this. Moblit and the others in their squad might have mentioned to Hanji how he made sure that her squad is fine and they won’t die anytime during the mission without her. Even if she didn’t tell him to do so, he knows it’ll make her sad if she finds out that something bad had happened on her squad and might even blame herself because she was not around. He didn’t want that to happen to her but he didn’t thought that he would be that obvious. Damn he wanted to pull Moblit’s tongue out.

“I can’t thank you enough but I hope this is okay.” He was forced to meet her eyes with that and he watched her descend her lips on his slowly and consume him fully. He can’t stop himself from closing his eyes and softly feeling her tongue work cautiously inside. The kiss she is giving him was gentle and tender that he had his hands move and caress her face as tender as her kiss to him. He breathed easily but she still had a bit harder time so she pulls away and gave his cheek a peck.

“I just hope what you told me about that two liter of shit first before I get the same illness that you have is true, shitty glasses.” He didn’t removed his hands on her face and smirked naughtily at her.

“I know you don’t doubt me and what I know. Besides, you’re the strongest living man and I bet you wouldn’t get ill that easily.” He continued to smirk at her and she just grin like the usual.

“You feeling better now four eyes?”

“Yeah, though my nose hasn’t really cleaned up a hundred percent but I can breathe perfectly normal now. I just need to blow it out sometimes so I can breathe properly again.”

“Coughs?”

“Almost all gone.”

“You still feel dizzy?”

“Nope.”

“Throwing up?”

“No. Gee Levi, you sound like my doctor. Don’t tell me you are planning to become a doctor.” She teased and laughed a bit and Levi pinched her ear to stop.

“I will if you will get ill more often than usual.” She stopped awkwardly from laughing and pulls her eyes away from his and slumps her face on his chest to hide her embarrassment. Whether that’s a joke or not, it is still enough to make her feel a bit shy. Even if it’s still a joke, jokes are half meant so he somehow means what he had just said.

They stayed together like that, her chin settling on his chest and hands curled around his waist as his hands were caressing her hair absently. The warmth was enough to provide them of what they had missed but Hanji has other plans. She is unsure but she just want to know if it’ll be okay with him. It’s better to try at least.

“Hey Levi?”

“Hm?”

She pulls her head up and stood by her hands and met his eyes. “After dinner, can I ask you to go inside my room?”

His eyes narrowed and he could swear his heart had stopped. Usually, he is the one asking for a round but if they both wanted it, they both move and act the same and end up having a wordless agreement of to consume each other for the night. It was not very often for her to ask for it but if she does, he really can’t say no.

“What are you getting at shitty glasses?” he asked even if he knows what she is talking about.

She looked away and her cheeks burned. “Well, since I missed the mission, I also missed riding my horse.” She confessed shyly.

He completely knew what she is trying to tell him. He didn’t gave her a response at first but when she bit her lip as she got tired of waiting for a few minutes, he then chuckled.

“You’re fucking impossible, you know that?” he face lit up when he said those words but Levi ignored the cuteness that she is showing and continued to talk. “Fine, an hour after dinner would be better. I might throw all the food I will take out of my guts if you will ride me hard for missing your horse.” She was scared that he might say no but she might have forgotten the agreement and need that they have between them. Besides, she hadn’t asked him most of the time.

Hanji smiled and hugged him so tightly and didn’t let go. “You’re the best Levi!” she kissed him on the lips playfully, adding extra nuzzle on it as she did so and left the room.

“An hour after dinner with Levi as my horse!” she mumbles before she got out of his room, jumping and hands on the air.

He watched her dance out his room and felt the burning sensation rising on his body be replaced by eagerness and excitement. He sat and took his towel.

He needs to make sure he doesn’t smelled like human blood or mud later.

 

**-x-**

“Oh Levi!”

Hanji was bursting his name on top of her lungs over and over again as she rode him furiously. Indeed she missed riding her horse because the way she pushed her hip onto him and feel himself get harder and harder inside of her walls.

“Ah! Levi!”

Her face was full of ecstasy and the way she making nasty circular motions on him was making him burst quickly than he anticipated. He watched as Hanji went up and down, continuing her vertical movements on his length, seeing it enter her and then see it entirely gulp inside of her as she moved. Her opened shirt were barely covering her breasts, her nipples hardened under her thin sheets whenever they had the chance to cover them. The way she held one hand on her hair and had the other caress his abs and her sweat making her glister along the light that the lamp is emitting inside her room was surely making her look way hotter and Levi loved every inch that he is seeing right now and he didn’t want her to stop.

“Ah! Ah! Ah! Argh!” She is way going crazy and even if her knees were aching already, she didn’t stop thrusting on him as much as she can.

His hands were perfectly settled on her leg and thigh, happy to see that she is enjoying herself. Before he ended up being her fucking horse tonight, he had tried his best to hide his desire to be inside her despite the promise that he made to her of getting laid like she had asked for like she does for him.

The very moment she pushed him on her bed, pulling his shirt up and started kissing his abdomen, his skin tickled and grew hot under her luscious lips. She opened her shirt, her chest flashed just like his and she endlessly dove for deep and hungry kisses from him. She was getting anxious and impatient so she removed his pants and hers and indulged on his length. He let out a shivery roar and held on her hair, unable to let go with the feeling of high intensity that she is giving him. He was not able to release on her mouth and had it released instead on her hands when she gently stroke him endlessly. Without a chase, she held on his length, had it prepared and slowly pushed herself, accepting him entirely despite the pain that she always feel.

 

The moment he saw her pained expression, biting her lip so she wouldn't let out a yelp of pain and her eyes twitching in an uncomfortable manner.

 

"Four eyes, are you sure about this?" he asked worriedly. "Why don't we just stop? You might not yet feeling better."

 

She doesn't know if what he is pertaining to his sudden sexual violation on her or her illness.

 

"No, I want this Levi, please." she begged and continue to push herself further onto him.

 

She closes her eyes and Levi can't help feeling his urges build so easily, she looked so fucking hot.   
She crawled on top but didn't let herself be disconnected from him. Her hand gripped on his shoulder and the held his face.

 

"I want you inside me Levi, badly." she whispers and that turned him on so bad that he started kissing fully on the mouth. He wanted to ask her why but he remembered that they are on an agreement of helping each other have the feeling of sensation that they are yearning for.

 

She resumed her former position on top of him continued her to work hard, going up and down on his length until she finally felt the pleasure she is seeking for. Her eyes looked ferocious and her hips made circular motions into his. The way she parts her lips to murmur his name and her words of ecstasy made him shiver in delight. She looked so hot and he swears that if she don't stop, he might explode inside of her unexpectedly, most especially when she bits her lip and scrubs her breasts and chest with her hand. Whenever she is flipping her hair and tilt her head, he shivers in delight as she looked amazing so hot.

 

A few more fast movements that she gave him and he felt her walls tightened on his length and he too was feeling on the edge about to explode but she came first, sighing in relief and in pure bliss. The way her eyes rolled and lids closes and making extra hot circular motions on him while her juices were spreading on his hard length caused him to finally feel that he is about explode as well so he pushed her a bit aside and she did her job. She watched him move a little bit away from her and she grabbed his length, caressing it with both of her hands as they both watched him explode his mighty seeds onto her hands. She didn’t stopped playing with it even if her hands were all gooey and sticky because of his milk.

 

The way he closes his eyes halfway and gritted his teeth and tighten his grip on her shoulders as she did her magic onto him, she realizes that he too had some good time as she did. She was just too high with the afterglow and effect that she didn’t even felt worried that she might get an unwanted pregnancy. Good thing she is fast and didn’t hesitated getting away from him even her body cried to just let him stay inside of her.

 

Levi hated her being detached from him since they both feel so alive and reconnected when they are connecting just like that. But he got no other choice but to let her pull herself out from him and watch her massage his balls and tenderly caress his oozing length. If she doesn’t stop what she is doing, he swears he will get hard again and might ask for another round. But that didn’t stop him from giving her a very slow and romantic kiss, a very grateful one for making him happy for the night.

 

Exhausted, Hanji slammed her body after milking him out dry and wiped her hands on the towel on her bedside table. She had always learned to place a towel in there for very important purposes whenever they are to spend the night together on her room. She groggily placed kisses on his chest and then on his cheek and jaw. She was breathing hard but is slowing down. She wrapped her hands on his head and embraced him as much as she wanted. Seeing how she moves, Levi could tell that she is still recovering and still hadn’t gotten that same energy that she had before.

 

“I want another round Levi.” She whispers to him and started scrubbing her wet and hot cavern onto him again. He groaned but he didn’t want to exhaust her that bad again, she might just get ill even if he wanted another round as well.

 

“You’re fucking tired already, you were already even shaking like hell.” What he said is true and he is staring to get worried badly. “Just sleep instead another round.” He pats her head and played on her while the other hand stayed on the curve of her back.

 

She desperately moved and kiss him again but started to lose energy to do so. “But I really missed you Levi.”

 

“No you just wanted to have some sex.” As harsh as it may sound, he didn’t want her to feel intimate and remind her that what they are doing is just for pleasure of sex, not any personal shit like missing one another.

 

“If I do, then I should have just had sex with Georges or Moblit!?!” she yelled angrily at him and he was surprised that she did such thing. “I only have sex with you idiot! And is it wrong that I miss you that bad? You don’t have any idea how worried you got me even if you’re that strong, you might still get killed!”

 

Her tone saddened and her voice broke. She tried to open her eyes as much as she can but her eyes were too heavy already.

 

“Whatever.” He murmurs and pulled her closer into his body so she won’t see how he is badly blushing. If only he hadn’t said that then he won’t hear those words that will surely hunt him for the night. “Just sleep or you’ll get ill again for exhausting yourself.”

 

He felt her smile on his skin and let her kiss him drowsily. “Thank you Levi.” She tells him on his lips then settles her head on the crook of his neck.

 

As he watched the light flicker from the ceiling and caress the sleeping body of Hanji on top of him, he wished that the world would stop spinning so they’ll stay longer like this, satisfied, barely bare and peaceful on each other’s embrace.

 

He doesn’t want anywhere else but here.

 

With her.

 

 


	10. Could We Stay Right Here, Until the End of Time, Until the Earth Stops Turning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for colonelmags for the shoutout! :D loads of love! :D

**Chapter 10:**

**Could We Stay Right Here,  
Until the End of Time, Until the Earth Stops Turning**

**-x-**

Sunday, a day reserved and given to all soldiers as a free day and Levi knew exactly how to use his free day today.

The very moment the sun rises, he spend no time wasting it and went to his feet and immediately cleaned and fixed his room, took a bath and ate breakfast. The cafeteria of the headquarters are usually quiet every Sunday, no doubt he only saw three other soldiers enjoying their bread, eggs and some coffee while he chose the usual menu that he always have, tea and some nice crunchy bread and some butter on it. The cooks for the day managed to serve some pancakes as well and he felt even happier.

“Morning Captain Levi” one of the young soldier who was assigned to be the cook for the day greeted him. He nodded in return.

“We have some pancakes for today since there are few people around. We think we managed to make enough for everyone who is around.” He handed Levi a plate of pancakes and the aroma of the food made Levi’s stomach gurgle with hunger.

“There are some fresh honey and fruits over there, you can add them to your pancakes to make them extra tasty.” He pointed at the left part and Levi smirked to himself. He places the plate of pancakes on his tray and thanked the soldier who had treated him with such kindness early in the morning.

Once he sat down on the chair and places his food on top of the table, he calmly devoured it, placing bits of pancake after pancake inside his mouth and bit of the bread on his other hand. The fruits and honey that he had added on his pancake greatly enhanced the effect of his indulgence on the food. His tea was also a perfect match to his pancakes and bread, hot and tasty as he swallowed it and eagerly flows warmly along his throat. The breakfast that he had was heavier than he thought and was perfect match for the morning of such fine day.

As he stood up and brought his plates and utensils into the cleaning area, he took another tray of same breakfast that he had took earlier and the young soldier who had greeted him moments ago eyed him questioningly. He saw him and the youngster immediately removed his eyes off him.

“This is for Hanji. You know how she could forget to eat sometimes.” He chuckled and the young soldier nodded and smiled.

“Here’s some strawberries and banana, she liked it on her pancakes and some cream.” The young man places them on top of the pancakes that Levi had gathered. He can’t help but be surprised that the young man seems confident of what he had said about Hanji and her taste with pancakes.

“You sure about that?” he can’t help but ask wearily.

“Yes Captain. The last time we served pancakes, she desperately looked for some strawberries but it was not available and only bananas and told us that she liked the combination of those two fruits with cream. We even thought that it was a weird flavoring but when we tried it, it was really exceptional.” The youngster explained.

Levi was surprised of what the young soldier had told him but he let him chop some fruits and serve some cream. While the young man was helping him prepare the pancakes for Hanji, Levi took the imitative to get some fresh milk that is placed on the other counter and filled a glass for her and places it together with on the tray with her pancakes.

“Do you need some help captain?” the young man asked as Levi tried his best to balance the food and glass of milk on the tray.

“No thank you. I can handle this. Thank you for your help and effort.” He thanked the young soldier and went on his way. The young soldier was delighted to be of help to his captain.

He even dropped by his room to grab the flower he picked up the day before during the drills and fixed himself before he goes on to the room of his destination sAs usual, Levi had no complications in opening Hanji’s door to her room, knowing where the secret spare key is hidden. Afterwards, he places the tray of food on her bedside table as the woman was on top of her bed facing her ceiling, snoring gently as a hand gently gripped on the pillow below her bed.

Levi smirked, she looks like she’s in heaven. The way she inhaled through her nose and exhaled on her mouth was really absurd but agonizingly cute and the way her hair spread on her pillow made was tempting and begging to be combed.

He wanted to wake her up but instead his eyes travelled along her room and decided to fix a couple of her messy things. He organized the books splattered across her room, spared her used quill aside, fixed her scattered papers on her desk in one folder, picked the dirty clothes and placed them on the laundry bin, threw some trash on the trash bin and swept the floor in a quick motion.

The smell of the pancakes eventually woke up Hanji and Levi was right on time finishing the rest of her unfixed papers. She was scrubbing her eyes, stretched and scratched her scalp. She looked where the smell was coming from and was surprised to see a plate full of pancakes with her favorite toppings. She smiled and crawled onto it and snatched the flower, smelled it and stared at it in awe. She didn’t seemed to notice that Levi was around so she jumped on her seat when Levi cleared his throat.

“Morning Shitty Glasses.” He smirked and laid down the papers on one side, organizing them carefully. Hanji eyed him and she smiled, placing the flower on her ear.

“Morning Levi. You seemed early inside my room today.” She mumbled and then stared at the food waiting for her. “You brought me this? That’s so nice of you.” She said and started to grab the utensils and the tray to place on her lap.

Levi walked towards her and halted her move. “Yeah, but you’re not eating unless you brush your teeth.”

“Seriously!? I just brushed my teeth last night! I always eat first before I brush my teeth!” she exclaimed but Levi held onto her wrist and gently pulled her up.

“Just do me a favor and brush your teeth before you eat. That’s disgusting, eating without even brushing your teeth first.”

“No it’s not.” She sighed but she followed his order since he bothered himself in bringing her some delicious breakfast.

Levi stood behind her, leaning on the wall as he watched her brush her teeth. The way she bumps her toothbrush on the walls of her mouth made him feel hot and anxious so he drove his eyes away of her and looked at the toilet instead and focused his attention there.

“I’m done, you happy now?” she tells him right after and was already beside him, not even noticing her nearing him since he focused entirely on the toilet to divert his attention.

He nodded and took her wrist and pulled her on her bed. She watched him wide eyed as he did so but relaxed when he handed her the tray of breakfast, hungrily eyeing the food as its delicious aroma enters her nose. Not long after Levi places the tray of food on her lap, she immediately devoured her food like some animal. As she ate her food, he took a chair and sat in front of her, crossing his arms and watch her eat.

Levi in turn stared at her with a smirk, happy that his effort was all worth it. He noticed that the flower on Hanji’s ear was still intact and he admired how she looked so pretty with her hair a bit disheveled, looking perfectly balanced with the flower that he chose.

She noticed that Levi was oddly staring at her so she swallowed her food followed by the milk then smiled at the man in front of him. She stretched her plate of still unfinished pancakes in front of him and grinned.

“Would you like some of my pancakes Levi?” she asked and Levi kindly passed her offer.

“No thanks, I already had my breakfast.” He waved his hand and she nodded in return. “How’s your food?”

“It’s delicious! I’m really glad you know how I wanted my pancakes to be like.” She tells him and speared another portion of her food.

“The cooks who were assigned today told me. You should thank them instead. I didn’t know shit about how you like you pancakes.” He exclaimed. He figured that staring at her as she eat was making him feel weird so he took a book that is nearest to him and opened it to glanced at.

“I’m glad you chose milk for me to drink this morning, it’s a really perfect match for my pancakes.” She giggles and Levi smirked at her.

“But you know I prefer _your_ milk better, right Levi?” she teased and Levi flushed, looking up to meet her eyes and all that he could into her face was how tempting and daring she is doing to him with a pretty devilish smile. She even licked the corner of her mouth that had been left with a few drizzle of milk.

She’s testing him and he doesn’t know what to do.

“Fuck” he whispers to himself and looked away from her, making her giggle and finish the least of her food.

“I’d love to have some of that too.” She tells him and he was caught back, he didn’t know that she heard him say that.

He looked at her quizzically and stood up. She looked at him with tempting eyes and he didn’t break the contact that they are sharing. She grinned like some she wolf and he liked it.

“You sure are a bit horny this morning, aren’t you Four Eyes?” he asked and lifted her chin and didn’t removed his hand so he could force himself to look deep on those chocolate hazel brown eyes.

“You seem not to know that I _always_ feel horny every morning, Levi.” she tells him and even sipped in one of his fingers that is nearest her lips. Levi’s left eye twitched, he could feel himself starting to feel different. The feeling of his finger being sucked by that familiar mouth and be licked by that playful tongue of hers was making his knees weak.

“It’s a Sunday Levi, couldn’t we at least have some fun?” she begged but he pulled away and groaned. “Come on, it’s very, very seldom that I’d ask you to fuck me you know? Please?”

Levi tightened his jaw and gritted his teeth. “Finish your breakfast first and I promise I’ll treat you into some nice and relaxing day.”

Hanji squealed and pulled him into a hug, making his body bend and jerk towards her. He cursed and she laughed because of almost flipping her tray of still unfinished food and cause a mess. “You’re lucky your food didn’t spread all over or I swear I won’t treat you nicely today.”

She just laughed on his treat and he couldn’t help but grin lightly at her and lift her chin again, pulling her into a soft and quick kiss on the lips.

“You’re right, it is a perfect combination.” She eyed him confusingly.

“The what?” she asked.

“Your breakfast, strawberries and bananas on pancakes and a glass of milk.” He teased back and a little color of crimson spread on her cheeks. “I can still taste them in your mouth.” Still not letting go of her chin and still a few inches away from her face, she indulged again on his lips with a little shake.

“And you had some black tea, your favorite, didn’t you Levi?” He didn’t answered and instead took her tray of food. Hanji suddenly panicked because she was almost done so she ate the remaining of her food and drank her glass of milk to the bottom.

Levi then took it finally and went towards the door. But before he could even exit her room, he winked at her. “You know that black tea _is_ my favorite and I made sure to have it on a very great day.”

Hanji was left on her room, gripping on her sheets and smiling onto herself.

 

 

**-x-**

Levi returned to Hanji’s room with a few bottles in hand and Hanji watched him from a top of her bed, clutching a book on her hand, reading it with full delight.

“What are those?”

“You’ll see. Close your damn book and shut your eyes a little so I can bath you myself.” He tells her and settles the bottles on a nearby table.

“But why?”

“You need to have your eyes rest first before you take a bath. Maybe that’s why you’re eyes became shitty because you don’t know how to take good care of them.” He saw her pout as he fixes the towels, clothes and other things that he would need to bath her, even preparing her bathtub and the water to be used.

When he was done, she was already laying on her back but her eyes are still open. He came towards her and crossed his arms in front of her. “You sure don’t know how to follow orders Four Eyes.”

“You promised me that you will treat me nicely today.”

“I did but you need to take a bath first. Besides, I’ll be the one bathing you instead.” He sighed and climbed on top beside her.

“But we won’t have sex in the bathroom, right? I can see it written all over your face.” Her tone was disapproving and unwilling.

“Just, just let me take you to bath first!” he told her as he scooped her up from her bed, the flower on her ear dropping on her bed and placed her tiny bathtub. Her clothes got wet when he threw her there and freaked out a little but she then laughed, and even tried to spread some water on him.

She stopped laughing when she saw him suddenly froze, hair and shirt soaked in water. She didn’t knew that she had poured too much water on him that much. His usual scowl also crawled back into his face and Hanji felt shuddered on what she had done.

“Sorry” she mumbles and tucks her hands on her thighs. She looked on the water and started removing her now dumped clothes.

“You better not regret making me join you there.” She suddenly hear Levi said and was surprised to see him removing his shirt, opening it and placing it on the floor. She wasn’t able to move a muscle most especially when his pants and underwear went down together below his knees. She gasped as she saw the familiar organ that had made her feel the most wonderful pleasurable feeling in the entire world. It sprang out to life and her face flushed crimson, unable to do. Her mouth hanged open as his length swayed between his legs. Its hardness and huge size made her panic inside.

“You’re staring Four Eyes.” He said proudly and Hanji shook her head back into reality.

“I’m not!” she retorted back but Levi could only smirk and laugh at the same time. Before he decided to join her on the tub, he removed her shirt where she gladly stretched her arms out for him. He turned his attention on her pants and pulled it off her as she watched him devilishly.

Hanji let out another giggle when Levi was able to removed her underwear as well and threw it on the bathroom floor. “You’re going to help me clean that up later, Heichou.”

“Tsk.” He snorted. “As if you ever clean your shit, I always end up cleaning your room anyway.”

Levi places himself behind her then she pulled his arms to wrapped it around herself. She leaned closer to his chest and she looked up to him, tracing his neck, tingling him to the fullest.

“You have to shut your eyes for a while before I pour some water on your face.” This time, she just smiled and nodded.

“Okay.” She whispers and gave his neck a lustful kiss.

As she shut her eyes, Levi playfully scrubs the lips of her womanhood and it made her shut her eyes even tighter, gripping on his hair. She bit her lip as he gives her more pleasurable feeling, her breath becoming even more and more ragged.

“Levi…” she whimpers his name and he loved it as always.

Levi nuzzles his nose into her ear and gave it a slight lick and kiss. “I’d punish you this time because you didn’t followed my orders right away.” His thumb made circular motions on her clit and she shivered in anticipation.

“Ah! Levi!” she gasped his name even louder when he entered his two fingers deeper inside of her.

She scrubbed her ass into his now hardening length but can’t do it properly because of the punishment that he is giving to her. He even placed soft and electrifying kisses on her neck, making her gasped every minute. Soon, after more minutes of sweet agonizing tortures that he is making inside of her with his digits, she pulled his hair even tighter and pushed her body into his harder. She let out a deep huge gasped and she blew everything on him. She felt exhausted but not enough to make her go to sleep.

Levi smiled in victory and places a kiss on her scalp. “Now that’s the way to make your eyes shut.”

He let her catch her breath and after a few inhales and exhales, he poured water on her hair and she didn’t fought back. She allowed the coolness of the water swallow her entirely and Levi had shampoo followed and applied on her hair. He scrubbed and massaged her scalp and she loved every bit of. She felt so relaxed, to think how strong and heavy his hands were he could still deliver a good massage on her scalp. The tension that she had on her brain has now finally left her and she felt so light.

The humming that she had lead out made Levi stop on what he is doing and rinsed her hair, Hanji laughing as he did so. He is glad that she is now letting herself enjoy what he is doing to her.

He spread bath wash on her body and scrub her body with a scrunchy towel, good enough to remove all the hard dirt that has been forming on her body. He scrub her body with right amount of gentleness and force, freeing her from any sort of stinginess and dirt and bacteria that she once mentioned. With the way he does it, she seemed to like as she smiled and hummed as her eyes were shut closed, making her extra adorable he thought.

He rinsed her body with water and had his other hand help scrub her bare skin and at the same time gently caressing her, massaging her tired body. She loved every bit of his touch which was different since he wanted her to relax and to soothe herself down. She just closed her eyes and feel his every touch, the sensation was thrilling beyond she could even imagine but she is loving it, appreciating inch and every bit of it.

It was no wonder that after Levi had dried her off and himself, she stared at him like a waiting animal then jumped into him, falling all over her bed. They turned and rolled and the bedsheets did the same as well too, covering their bare body half way.

Levi didn’t fought back as she went to his lips and entering his mouth with her tongue. He allowed her to bit him in the neck, kiss his chest down to his abdomen to his long hardened length. She swallowed him whole, having her tongue swirl around with joy along his shaft. His hands automatically crept on her hair, gripping it but the way that he knows it is tolerable enough for her to handle. She even played on his balls but what she did didn’t even lasted long since she moved back to place kisses on his neck as she played along his balls and dick. He shivered and had his clean body drench in sweat and he felt sticky because of what she is doing.

He luckily managed to control his wanting explosion and pleasure so he flipped them both, Hanji ending underneath him. Her eyes widened as he did so and she was halted on her ferocious act.

“I really want you inside of me Levi” she begged and in an instant he immediately captured her mouth, kissing her endlessly and had his hands parted her legs. He caressed her thighs with his soft touch of his fingertips, gave each thigh a soft kiss and she moaned in his touch. He parted away from his kiss and crawled down under her womanhood that he had just earlier pleased with his touch, and is now willing to please with his mouth. He sucked and licked her, played her cave’s lips as though he is not a clean freak like they used to tease him.

What she doesn’t know is that he doesn’t mind being nasty if she is even the reason why. He couldn’t even get enough of her and he just yearn for her presence every single fucking day. After a long day’s work or after a never ending terrible mission, he would want to see her glowing face that had never even looked tired or wasted and would secretly wanted to wrap his arms around her until he falls asleep. He always had a better sleep when he knows she’s there and right beside him.

When he was done and had her explode for the second time only in the morning, he wiped his face with his arm and crawled back on top of her to kiss her. Her hands hanged loosely on his hair as she responded a bit sloppily, still high in the after eating her.

He traced her cheeks, her neck and her chest with his delicious and teasing kisses and she responded by leaning her neck to give more way for him to kiss her in more parts and lightly caressing his scalp, encouraging him to move slow and sweet. Before he could even move down and prepare himself to enter her (being shorter than her is fucking hell since he can’t kiss her and enter her at the same time) he gave her a slow and open mouthed kiss, pushing his tongue onto hers, battling for his dear life. Before he could even get to move down and she could realize what is about to do, she stopped him from doing so embraced him warmly, his heart about to melt with the warmth that she is emitting.

They stayed liked that for a while and he appraised the feeling of being warmly bare together with her. The feeling was soothing he thought of just staying that way instead of moving inside her. She traced her fingertips to his back and it left a trail of flame on his bare back. No words were exchanged between the two of them and just completely apprehend the endearment that the two of them were sharing.

Hanji inhaled Levi’s smell, she absolutely is addicted into his smell and it will even haunt her most of the time. She nuzzled her nose onto his jaw and placed a single kiss on his cheek. He pulled away a bit farther to look at her deep in the eyes which was sparkling with enthusiasm. She bit her lip when he smirked and when he leaned into her to kiss her in her lips, she moved her lips onto his ear instead and gave it a light bit.

“I want you now Levi please, even if it would be quick.” She whimpered and he nodded in agreement so he moved down and readied his hardened member inside of her. Placing his hand on her thigh and the other on her entrance he slid himself inside of her. She gasped as the familiar pain shot through her once again and gripped on the pillows, biting her lip but continued to press herself into him even deeper.

As always, he moved slow at first trying to find the right pace but when he finds the perfect pace, she too would eventually feel the pleasure at enjoyment that she is seeking for. He loved it when she is starting to giggle because she knows she is having fun and loving what he is doing to her.

And because he never wanted to see Hanji crying as he fucks her.

He froze and Hanji saw the sudden change of emotion on his face so she leaned into him and kissed him as she stood from her elbows, cupping both of her hands onto his cheek. He didn’t returned the kiss at first but when he did, he did it with great amount of enthusiasm.

When she pulls away carefully, he took it as a cue to continue and grip on her waist and balancing her other leg on his other hand so she can properly widen her legs. He rubbed her thigh, placing large then small circle shapes on it as he pumps inside of her, not letting go, deeper and deeper, faster and faster their hips moving in one rhythm and as much as he didn’t let go of her, she did the same to him. She crept her hands to his strong legs surrounding her as it slowly crawl onto his ass and giving it a squeeze, a groan coming out of his lips.

As he thrust into, neither of them still not meeting their limits, their just dried bodies were now drenched in sweat but neither of them seemed to mind. He leans down into her gave her breast a lick and a tiny bit each and then she screamed in ecstasy, giving out all her juices onto him, shaking heavily as she gripped hard on his body. He made five more thrust into her then he too followed, pulling his length away from her and poured his seeds on a towel she had always prepared for the both of them.

His eyes crawled on the back of his head and he let out a loud roar as he milk run empty. Hanji watched him scrub and clean himself so she sat up and captured his lips again, slightly giving the side of his lips a lick and kissed him with appreciation.

Levi’s hands crawled behind her and slowly, he carried her weight and gently places her body down on the sheets, eyes closed and tongues and lips not letting go of each other.

They drifted off to sleep with faces glued on each other, cheeks flushed and lips still grazing over one another.

 

**-x-**

 

Hanji was the one to woke up and saw that the time was already an hour passed lunch so she tried to moved but when she realized that Levi’s face was on hers, she can’t help but giggle and kiss his cute nose. He didn’t made any move so Hanji decided to give more little affectionate actions to him. She placed her left hand on his cheek very gently and cupped it then she had her right caress his hair. Her other leg even tangled in between his legs, feeling that nasty length of his on her skin. She placed very little kisses into both of his cheeks, his eyes, his lips, nose then numerous more on his forehead and hair.

Kissing him there was a great and liberating feeling, she felt like she is kissing some kind of baby. He just looked so angelic and handsome that she is glad she could get to get fucked by someone like him. Looking at him that intensely made her feel that she is caressing the world’s strongest who just fucked her the way she liked it.

Yes, fucked. The term that making love because he doesn’t love her and she is perfectly sure about it.

She shoved the thought off but deep in her heart she is still grateful to Levi for making her experience some kind of wonderful and intimate feeling that she never thought she would get to feel. Even before, she thought only wonderful and beautiful women who really acts and behave like a real woman can get to feel this kind of pleasurable feeling but she was wrong.

Staring at Levi as she gently traces the features of his face made her cheek warm. She adores his small pointed nose, thin lips and peaceful eyes which is ironically looked burdened once opened. She lifts her fingertips and trace each of his face’s features lightly all over again and again until her fingers made contact with his hair and there she grazed on as softly and lightly as she could. Grazing her fingers on his hair and top most scalp that lightly made her feel that she is like grazing over a baby’s head instead.

She didn’t stop herself in showering him more kisses on his head and forehead, just like a huge baby.

Levi’s eyes suddenly crinkled and moved, his eye ball obviously moving underneath his eyelids. Then it opened slowly, showing those beautiful grey orbs that Hanji always loved. Grey, the color of wisdom and she had always kept it a secret to herself that the color that his eyes signifies is also one of the things that he is giving to her.

“Hey baby face.” She teased and placed a kiss on his nose. He didn’t got mad and scrubs his eyes.

“Hey shit face.” He groaned and sat up right immediately, conscious of his possible bad breath. He saw the time and shook his head. He stood up as Hanji looked at him, smiling. His was freed from the bed sheets that had tangled on his now exposed body and exposed his flawless ass.

Damn she wanted to give that ass some nasty squeeze.

She ignored his solid rock body that is pure of muscles and completely focused on that cheeky white ass of his.

“Stop staring at my ass.” he mumbled, noticing how her eyes were glued on his back. She let out a light jump on her place and then laughed awkwardly.

“Sorry, can’t help it. You should know that your ass is cute.” She bit her lip and instead of giving her light pinch on the head, he pinched her nose instead after he wears his underwear and pants.

“Don’t say that my ass is cute.” She twitched when he pinched her nose.

“Why not? It does!” she said as she scrubs her nose.

He didn’t answered back but gave her nose a kiss, holding her wrist as he did so.

“I’d go get us some lunch downstairs. You just wait here.” He puts on his shirt and went on his way.

Hanji nodded and as she watched him go out of the door, she gripped one her bedsheets, gathered them along with her pillows and hugged them so tightly and throws herself back on the bed.

She doesn’t know why Levi is acting this way today, extremely weird and extra thoughtful but she thought that she doesn’t mind spending her Sundays like this. And she hoped for more Sunday spending with Levi.

 

 

**-x-**

The two of them ate their lunch quietly since they felt really hungry after waking up. Hanji finished her food fast as usual but did slowed down a little to match it with Levi’s pace. He brought tea for him and a glass of fresh fruit juice for her and some glass of water for the both of them. He brought her some fresh vegetables wrapped all together and drenched in some tasty sauce and some fruits for her dessert. Levi in the other hand had some buttered beans and potatoes and those curled bread that he always liked.

Hanji didn’t even bothered wearing her clothes back on but he didn’t seemed to mind so she continued to devour her meal up to the very last bit. She was very grateful for Levi’s initiative and willingness to pamper her today as her eyes followed him as goes back to return the dishes that they used and wait for him as she tried to hide her squeals from him.

What she doesn’t know is that there are still more that he is going to do to her.

Once Levi had arrived once again on her room, he gave her a look that she even thought that he will return to his room but instead he crawled behind her after taking the bottles that he had brought earlier the day and once he had settled himself behind her, he pulls her towards him as he opened his legs so she could completely lean onto his hard muscled body.

Hanji let out a surprised squeak as he did so and placed her hands on top of his. She giggled and places a kiss on his jaw.

“What are you up to now, captain?” she asked teasingly then gave his hand a kiss as well.

“Just shut up and tell me if it hurts or not.” He left her question unanswered because he wanted to surprise her once again.

Hanji had let him do his magic as she felt the movement of his hands crawl on both her breasts at first. His fingers had teased her nipples, tracing around her areola then when she got hardened, he pinched those begging nipples of hers. A light moan escaped her lips but then she felt his fingers leaving her breast.

Levi quickly took one of the bottles that he brought with him earlier the day and opened it, giving it a squeeze where liquid came out and dropped into his hand. He measured the quantity that dropped on his hand carefully, making sure that it is the right amount that he needed.

Hanji was surprised that he pulled his hands away from her breasts but was even more surprised when she felt that his hands returned to her small but perky breasts and felt something different on them.

“Levi?” his name suddenly crawled out of her lips as her hands suddenly groped her breasts again but this time, she is certain that he is doing something different.

“Just don’t move and let me work.” She obeyed even she doesn’t really have any idea where he is getting at. After letting him do his work on her, she leaned into his back and relaxed. Closing her eyes she had swear that this is definitely such a great thing to be done to her, even if she didn’t had that much of a bosom.

Levi spread the oil into her breasts and gladly massaged them with his fingers and his palms. With huge and strong hands, he managed to caress and pamper her as pleasing as he could. He is very careful not to place any kind of bruise or unwanted scars by his nails on her if he freaks out. He never wanted to hurt her unintentionally again so he tried his best to contain his excitement and furiousness and pamper her the at the highest rate as he can.

Hanji sighed heavily, exhaling deep as she let out all the stress and fatigue exit her body as Levi massage her small bosoms. Good thing he is not complaining even if they were that small, he actually never did for all those time that they had sex. Sometimes she is tempted to ask him about it, if he is alright with her breasts or not so she could do something to herself and make them huge, which she has an idea how to but not entirely a hundred percent sure if it will work just to please him.

The gentleness that he is doing unto her made moan and bit her lip for many times in a row, it’s a good thing he can’t see her doing so. She can’t really admit that he is loving it or else he might stop and she didn’t want that to happen since she is still enjoying every ounce of his massage on her breasts that he is doing.

She raised her hands and entangled her fingers on Levi’s raven black hair and made circular motions on his scalp. He was surprised of this action of hers but didn’t made anything that would make her stop from doing it to him. Besides that, he knows that she definitely is having a good time right and loves what he is doing to her.

They continued to stay like that for half an hour, not even knowing that the rain is falling hard outside the headquarters and just felt extra cold and heard it after each rain drop falls a bit louder than the usual. They caressed and pampered one another with their caressing hands and adored each movement that they have emitted to one another.

Hanji had let the hands of Levi caress her breasts with oil, scrubbing her side breasts with his palms and his fingers to her nipples. Every caress, every movement made her shiver and felt electrifyingly crazy and she yearned for me so she didn’t asked him to stop even a second. He then moved to grope her entire breasts together and worked on it below, then above. She wondered if he ever had a chance to do this to another woman because the way he moves and serve her like that is like he had actually done this before.

“You really are great in doing this Levi, giving me a boob massage. Have you even tried this before to another woman?” she asked, can’t help herself from asking.

He stopped on his massaging magic and pulled her closer, making her lean further down and have her head rest on his lower abdomen. She stared up into those deep gray eyes and she could see the seriousness on those eyes of his.

There was a bit of hesitation when he opened his mouth and then closed it again before he answered and Hanji wondered why he is a bit nervous in answering her question.

“Lev---“

“No.” he answered bluntly but she still continued to look at him questioningly in the depths of his eyes. He sighed as he knew that she too knows that he still has more to say.

“Alright fine,” he admitted and Hanji eyebrows rose. “no, not to a woman.”

“You mean---“

“Itriedittomyself.” He blurted out in a speed of light and Hanji held her laughter. He could clearly see that she is struggling to keep her laughter to herself, biting her lip and even had both of her hands to cover her mouth.

“Don’t you fucking laugh!” he yelled out and tried to push her lightly off him.

“But why would you do something like that?” She had completely started to laugh already and she can’t control it any longer. “I can completely imagine it Levi!” she continued to laugh and Levi was still unsuccessful in pushing her away.

“So I would know and won’t do it shitty to you.” The laughter of Hanji suddenly stopped.

Did she just heard it right?

He did something too girly and scrub his own tits so he could properly massage hers? So that he could please her?

She sat up and stared at his eyes. Levi soon felt awkwardness running into his veins and he took his eyes off her and stared at the fucking bed sheets instead. He could still feel her eyes heavy onto him and he can’t take it anymore, most especially that he could feel his own face heating up.

“You really did that?” Hanji asked curiously, trying to search his face and scooped her face down so she could see his eyes looming on the bed.

“You heard what I have said right? Or you’re fucking deaf now too?” his tone was clearly annoyed yet he could still feel the heat on his face.

When he brought his eyes back to look at her, she smiled at him so warm that he wanted to kiss her. Hanji slowly crawled to him and places herself on top of his lap. There was a very small distance between them and she places her arms around his neck. She made sure to make herself comfortable onto him and locked her eyes on him.

“I never thought that you can do something like that” she said in an almost whisper like voice. He managed to give her a smirk and as she places a kiss on his forehead, he did the same and kisses her on her chest.

“You know I don’t want to massage you pathetically. I might hurt you unintentionally and might even give you those fucking bruises again. I’m not that brainless you know?”

“Or heartless.” She added and intertwined her fingers onto his hair and he just stared at her smiling face, unable to say something back. He really hates it when she compliments him, he doesn’t even know what to say back.

Instead of finding the right words so he could respond to her, he brought his hands back to her breasts and gently gave both a soft grope and then gentle massaging of his thumbs in the sides of both of her breasts.

Hanji closes her eyes and moans, even giving her head a lean back to feel his massages even better. Levi in turn couldn’t feel even happier as she still seemed to be enjoying his pleasurable caress and continued to pamper her body. When he stops and looked at her, she grinned at him and embraced him, his face completely locked on her chest, her chin on top of his head. He tucked her body even closer to his and ran his hand up and down of her back.

“I loved it Levi. It was really fun.” She whispers and gave his scalp a light kiss.

Levi felt anxious all of a sudden and he tightened his embrace on her. He lifts his face up a bit, enough to had his breath tickle her ear.

“Hey” he whimpered, struggling to tell her something that he really wanted her to know.

“Yeah?” she cooed on his scalp and caressed his jaw with her fingertips.

“We can do this again if you wanted to, all you need to do is to tell me.” He tells her and she instantly felt bubbly all of a sudden.

Hanji brought her face to his and glued her forehead to his. Scrubbing her nose to his, he smirks at her and she kisses his nose.

“Of course, Levi.” She tells him and kisses his jaw. His eyes suddenly turned mellow and showed worry all of a sudden.

“Was it okay?” he asked.

“More than okay, it was really great. I felt really relieved from all the stress and hard work this week.” She sighed and had her hands caressed his shoulders and arms. “I really am grateful that you get to pamper me today.” She said gratefully and grinned at him warmly.

“All those works tires you a lot, and Erwin just kept on pouring them on you like he always does. The asshole he is.”

“Hey” she grabs his chin so she could focus on his eyes alone. “It’s alright. He actually asks me if I can still make it because if not, then I can say no to him.”

Levi still locked is eyes on to her, not really quite agreeing on her words or even convinced.

“Besides I enjoyed it you know? It was a great honor to have my studies and researches about Titans be considered in the educational curriculum of our people, at least they wouldn’t get too naïve or stupid about them, and that even if they don’t want to be part of us who fights titans, they could still be educated and have knowledge about them. You may not know but someday, some of our people, some our citizens may have an idea how to fend off titans and help preserve humanity since they are familiar with titans.” She explained to him.

Everything that she had mentioned were all true but what he doesn’t like is that it will be another burden for her to accomplish. He may not like it but she does seemed to be having a great deal of enjoyment into it and he would volunteer to help since he knows Moblit and her squad are not the only ones that can help her achieve and accomplish everything that she does for their people but also for the Survey Corps and for her research about titans.

He tucks away a few stray of hair that went into her eyes and neatly tucked them behind her ear. After he did so, he stared into those beautiful chocolate brown eyes of hers. With her words and motives, it is no doubt that Erwin had chosen her to be next in line after him.

“I just hope this had lessened your stress, I know you’re busy doing a lot of things.” He removed his stare into her awkwardly as he says so, leaving her with a goofy smiling face. She didn’t know that he could get this concern towards her.

“So you did all of this just to lessen the stress that I am feeling?” he didn’t said anything in return and couldn’t even look at her straight in the eyes. It made her laugh, seeing him shy that way so she tucked herself better onto him and he allowed her to do so, still not letting go of her.

“Just so you know Levi, just being with you is enough to drive my stress away, even if you pamper me like this or not.” She admitted into his ear and gave it a small peck.

She smiled when she parted her face a bit from his so she could see how his emotion. Pleased even. Levi had the courage to look at her now and without breaking their stare, he moved his hands on her back and her behind and gave it a squeeze. She gave out a cute squeak and held onto him even tighter.

“I figure even if I do that, that is still stress relieving to you?” he asked teasingly and he didn’t let a smile of hers not to be seen.

“Yup” she replied and nuzzles her nose into his jaw then nose. “I actually kind of liked it.”

“I like it if I am the only one who does it.”

“You _are_ the only one who does that.”

“Really now?”

“Yeah, positive about that.” She replied back and with a few bumps of noses and foreheads, she kissed him fully on the mouth as she felt his strong but gentle hands caress her back until his fingers slowly caress her spine. Her legs were on top of his lap, not wanting to lose her balance and fall so she fixes herself. As she grew a bit conscious while he caress her body, she tilts her head a bit to the right so she could enter his mouth even deeper. She desperately wanted to thank him for making her feel so relaxed and rejuvenated so she kisses her passionately with all her might, massaging his lips with her, her tongue exploring his mouth endlessly as she does so. Her nose scrubs itself on his face when she wanted to pull and get some air to breathe and then attacks his mouth again with her luscious deep kisses.

As she kisses him, he reluctantly lifts her body then places it flatly on the bed, not breaking the kiss that they are doing. When she felt her body flat on the bed, Hanji had allowed Levi to kiss her shoulder, neck, chest and abdomen which she really loves. Levi felt tiredness taking over his body even if he didn’t doesn’t really know why but he allowed it to take over him.

Hanji had clung onto him even tighter as he led her down flatly on the bed then had captured him for an embrace and ventured into a deep sleep when she saw his eyes being droopy. She watched him eagerly as he prepares to have another deep sleep, smiling at his cute and sleepy face sheepishly.

“Stop smiling you idiot” he murmurs and it made her giggle so she kissed his nose and cupped his face.

“Thank you Levi, I really felt relieved today. I guess I could go another week of busy scheds.” She told him and he closes his eyes and smiled. He too cupped her face with both of his hands and nuzzled his nose to her face, before the two of them could really go back to sleep.

He wanted to thank her as well because his only intention was to help her get the right amount of rest so she could feel relaxed and away from stress even for a day but he didn’t expect that he too, would be able to have some time to relax as well. Most especially that he could feel her skin into his, being bare and warmly scrubs her body to his, as his exposed chest feel her bare body was just tantalizing. He didn’t expected that he would be rejuvenated as well, most especially that she’ll be the reason as he is to her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -x-
> 
> Because we have that one moment where we feel horny and wanted nothing but to relax. Breasts massages seems nice as well and relaxing, and we all need to rest even for an entire day.  
> I don’t know why but I adore this chapter, maybe because I worked hard on this while being on work.  
> This is an additional chapter to be honest and was not included in the original flow like chapter 6 and was done just recently, added to the original story line and managed to finish this chapter. I was even surprised that it was this long T.T  
> Hope the chapter was okay.
> 
> Xoxo  
> LadyinBLack


	11. I Sense There's Something in the Wind, That Feels Like Tragedy's at Hand

**Chapter 11:**

**I Sense There's Something in the Wind**  
That Feels Like Tragedy's at Hand  
  


 

 

**-x-**

 

Levi is used with Hanji’s smiles and goofy laughs being naturally part of her personality and he would be seeing everyday but to Hanji, it is weird and uncommon for her to see Levi smile at her sincerely out of nothing and would even sneak up to wink at her in the middle of a sea of people.

Levi would never, _ever,_ do such a thing to her.

Levi had always been very careful and extremely secretive of his contract with Hanji and would never let any action indicate that they treat each other more than just comrades and friends.

Any kind of relationship is not much forbidden in the Recon Corps, even the younger soldiers would mostly consume the mouth of their lovers anywhere, anytime they wanted to but will act formal when there is a veteran officer along the way. What they don’t know is that the veterans are fully aware of their doings.

Levi wouldn’t care to do the same with Hanji but what he wanted to maintain is clean and clear authority and respect from the younger soldiers. If he acts the same as them, then he is no different from then as well, a bunch of rookies and inexperienced brats.

But to Hanji’s surprise, he had been acting really strange, different is the more proper term.

Aside from his sneaky winks and smiles and caresses under the table, most especially during their meetings or eating on the same table with the other veteran officers (which he really doesn’t do), the way he had acted towards her recently--- dozing off with her, their arms on each other, him checking on her inside her room and even snuggling with her after he reads her paper, kissing her before the mission inside the stables and even getting no sleep and washing all the sheets and clothes she had thrown up with.

She did remembered the way how he violated her in some point but still reminds herself that it is also her fault because she didn’t fought back, that she had allowed him to take action and not fight back except when she had started to feel pain that she could no longer bear. It did haunted her for sometimes but she succeeds in shrugging it off, reminding herself that Levi is her best friend and comrade and he too didn’t do it without any reason but to teach her a lesson as well, just a bit harsh though.

He had been very hesitant after what had happened between the two of them and even barely talked to her or approach her. He would ask one of his subordinate, most especially Petra when he wanted to ask a question or wanted to give her something. He has a lousy nose saying that one of his boys might have a liking on her so he sends Petra to her instead.

She snorted at that. She knows that he fancies Petra that’s why he would always ask her to talk to her instead and just using her as a reason. She wanted to laugh over it because he is acting like a complete jealous freak but in reality, just wanted to talk to Petra. Hanji is certain about this, even if panged her heart a bit unwantedly.

But the main focus is that he doesn’t approach her or anything so she made the first step and tried talking to him, holding his wrist as she does so and smiled more often. She would visit him inside his room without even knocking or when she knocks, she won’t tell him that it’s her so he would be surprised. He would sigh but he would give in and she would see in his eyes that he is still feeling guilty and hurt of what he had done to her. After a series of time, Levi changes and they eventually had recovered their usual selves and friendship after a few months, and it was the most antagonizing and longest months for her with Levi acting like shit.

But now, Levi is acting differently again and seeing Levi act that way, being like a trying hard romantic freak did gave her the creeps sometimes but she would smile at him and the way he lightens up through his eyes and vibes, it melts her heart quickly. She doesn’t know how to react on how he flushes because of her.

Hanji could swear that her heart is beating inappropriately, like it is telling her something towards Levi. Recently, she feels a bit awkward having him around her since she does not want to tolerate herself feeling something more than just what she shares with him, believing that it’ll be pointless since is not a man of love or anything of some sort, he is the type of man who would be too busy being the world’s strongest.

Just like her, she would be pretty busy being world’s brightest and could not tolerate love or any other serious kind of relationship. Researches and answers should be her top priority, not love and being the other typical woman in town. She should be helping Erwin minimizing the numbers of death of their every expedition and every year. Everyone is depending on her about the answers that they are yearning for about titans and she shouldn’t just foolish around.

But deep in her heart, she knows that she has her needs and desires too. She is human after all; a woman who wanted what other woman has as well. She had never gave love or any foolish emotions a chance long before and now that she had given it a chance to be tolerated, it burns like a hell inside of her, burning her painfully and she doesn’t know what to do. She has no idea how to put it down.

And Levi is the cause of it.

He is definitely not the type of man who would just caress her every night and be there to put her into sleep. He wouldn’t be the one to kiss her when she feels down and comfort her when she will cry. But recently, his actions has been telling otherwise and she is not dumb to know it. It confuses her a lot, convincing herself that he is just playing around. She knows perfectly that he is just messing with her, nothing else.

He is, right?

Even if he had just been extremely kind and caring on her the past few weeks and had been extra cuddly and affectionate? Even those sneaky kisses that he does to her?

He totally wouldn’t be really that into her right?

She’s got nothing special anyway, aside from being brainy and capable answering most of the questions that everybody desires. Like what he always tells her, she is stinky and is definitely shitty as hell. But she also remembers that he is the only who could tolerate that and would even plan a surprise attack on her so he bath her himself. She knows that their friendship is too deep, too strong to be broken that easily but she never had any intention of putting it into a more advance level.

She groaned as the thought made her head ache and she focused her eyesight on the people surrounding her, watching her say another word after a brief minute relapse in the middle of her discussion about the titan traps that she had proposed. All eyes were heavy on her and she felt a sudden confusion on what she was doing. If she hadn’t focused on Levi’s grey orbs then she shouldn’t be having difficulty this way.

“I ahm, do you have any questions?” she let out a nervous laugh and eyed every person inside the room except for the raven-haired man that had just recently blurred her mind, though she could definitely feel his eyes prying her, telling her to look at him as well.

Erwin stood up and wrapped the agenda up when he saw that no one inside the room had decided to ask her. She looked at him and smiled as he was able to saved her in the middle of a tensed room.

“You explained everything well, Hanji. That’s enough for today. All we have to do is to wait for the higher up’s decisions on your proposed project for the Corps.” He gestured his hand the usual way and had the meeting room empty.

Hanji had troubles fixing her things, too many since the visuals, maps, sketches, notebooks and whole other materials that she had used for the presentation had gotten all messy on top of the table. She was organizing them and saw her the people swarming out of the room.

“We will go ahead of you, Hanji” Erwin tells her as he saw her struggling fixing her things. “I’m sorry I can’t wait for you any longer.”

“It’s alright, I know you need to go with them Erwin.” She agrees and gave a second to flash him a reassuring smile.

“Just close the door when you leave.”

“Will do.” She tells him and waves him goodbye.

Her eyes roamed on her things, analyzing where to be taken and the others if they are in need to be fold and checked the smaller ones, tucking them carefully with the bigger ones. She was too focused on what she was doing that she didn’t noticed that light but familiar footsteps was coming near her.

“Let me help you with that.” Her eyes gazed over the manly hands that had caressed her for multiple times on her most treasured parts of her body and she felt the same pleasurable shiver all over her again.

“Levi” she murmurs and watched him organize her things instead. “Look, I got this.”

“No you don’t. I’ve been looking at you for ten fucking minutes and you’re not even done fixing your shit.” He tells her and doesn’t meet her eyes. He somehow felt embarrassed all of a sudden and felt his cheeks warmed.

“You were staring at me while I am busy fixing my things? Why haven’t felt you even there anyway?” Hanji asked in bewilderment. What he doesn’t know is that she is sharing the same amount of redness on her face as him.

“Tsk. Where the hell is Moblit? He should be the one helping you with this mess.” He complained but he didn’t stop arranging the papers with loads of written shit on them and didn’t stopped even for a minute to read or take a glance on them. He bit his lip to stop himself confessing into her that he has been staring at her glorious ass.

“Well, he was there a while ago but I told him that the meeting is not yet thru so I asked him to come back after an hour. But I guess the meeting didn’t turned out to extend for even more than twenty minutes.” She laughed awkwardly and saw Levi now done with her things. She had always had a trust on him whenever he is going to help her clean her things and arrange them. It’s like he knows where to put them exactly and she wouldn’t even feel worried and lost at all.

Without a word, Levi took her wrist and pulled her out of Erwin’s office and lead her to her room. She gazed at his firm hand gripping on her wrist with questioning eyes, even if she is starting to get the feeling that she knows what he is up to.

“Levi, what are you doing?” she watched him place her things on her desk and then shut the door with extra double security check. If he _wanted_ it today, she is not sure if she could give it to him. She feels a bit tired and has another appointment with a friend to attend to.

Levi approached her with a plastered smirk on his face but when he saw the worry written on Hanji’s face, he stepped back.

“Something you want to tell me Four Eyes?” he asked, not letting the disappointment be traced along his voice. He knows that she wouldn’t want to spend a few time with him today it seems.

Hanji bits her lip hard and trembled as she spoke. “Well, I promised Georges that we will head out in the towns market today and insist that we should miss the feast in there.”

Levi suddenly felt his heart stopped beating on what he had heard. “You’re fucking going to have a date outside with him?”

“It’s not really much a date Levi. He just wanted me to experience really celebrate a feast and go around the town without hesitation or problem in mind.” She immediately responded. She didn’t knew that mouth will betray her that easily and suddenly felt regretful of what she had just did.

“I take you there sometimes right, what the difference anyway?” he crossed his arms and tried to maintain a casual voice and leaned on the wall, staring deep into her eyes.

“You don’t seem happy everytime you’re going to the town with me Levi. You even end up saying how you would rather go and fix the Corps’ cleaning supplies or check them if they’re complete and that you are just forcing yourself to take me out and I should be even grateful. Don’t even dare try to deny that Levi.” She tells him, a bit angered and even causing her to stand on her feet.

Levi stared at her with a bit more rounded eyes. He didn’t know that those words of his was beyond the line already and that Hanji didn’t liked them. He actually thought that she thought that he was just messing around whenever he tells her that. He didn’t knew that it had a different effect on her part.

He gave out a deep sigh and untangled his arms in front of his chest and closed the gap between them.

“Okay look, I didn’t know that you didn’t liked what I’ve said. I’m sorry.” He apologized and held both of her hands with his. The difference with their heights was a bit bothersome but the two of them had already able to compromise with it already.

Hanji flashed him a tiny smile and cupped his face with both of their hands still joined together. “I know you’re not pretty good with jokes or maybe you are just not really fond of going to feasts like that. But I just hoped that you had just told it to me and not force yourself, you know?”

In truth, it was really okay for him to accompany her to towns and let her watch some feasts but he is confused whether he had missed something or not. The warm embrace of Hanji, her thin but hard and ironically smooth arms encircled on him made him sigh in relief and gently pats and scrubs her back.

“I’m sorry we can’t have some kinky fun today Levi.” She whispers to his ears and he felt the usual chill that crawls on him whenever she whispers that way on his ear. “Next time, I swear.” She promised and exits her room, giving his scalp a sweet and quick kiss. She had always a thing giving him a kiss there, maybe because the way his hair smelled drives her mad.

As Levi watched Hanji exited her own room, he can’t help but realize that he had lost the feeling of disgust by just her simple affections towards him. Even he should be feeling sick and used to it, he finds himself even yearning more and more of it from her.

If only he could really have her permanently in life, he wouldn’t hesitate to show and return more same affections towards her.

 

**-x-**

Hanji arrived fifteen minutes late with the agreed time with Georges and was extremely worried. The huge crowd that had gathered along the streets of the town had given her a harder time to move around and look for the huge curly hair guy anywhere even if she had arrived on the very area where they agreed to see each other.

When she had seen him, Georges automatically encircled his arms around her thin body and embraced her, even lifting her from her feet. Despite the lack of her entering her lungs, she still managed to giggle. They didn’t separated their linked arms after he places her down again to the ground.

“I’m sorry I was late” she apologized and was not able to fully meet Georges’ glazing eyes. “I got caught in the middle of the crowd. I didn’t expected that it’ll be this huge.” She looked around the people buzzing everywhere, laughter and loud music roaring along the streets.

Georges’ let out a laugh. “don’t worry about it! I can’t blame you with that”

Hanji saw the sincerity of being forgiven on his eyes and joined him in letting out a laugh as well but then, he stopped all of a sudden and Hanji stopped laughing immediately.

“Something w-wrong Georges?”

The man looked at her straight in the depths of her eyes. “Yeah, now that you mentioned it, I want you to do something for me since you got late.”

Hanji froze and felt a lump on her throat formed.

“What is it? I thought me being late was okay?” she asked, worry very present on her tone.

“I changed my mind. I’ll forgive you if do what I will say.” He said seriously.

“What is it then?” she asked and hoping she is hiding the fear all too well.

Georges leaned his face closer to her and she felt her heart stopping all of a sudden, her face feeling hot.

“I want you to have fun with me until the sun replaces the moon.” He whispers then pulls himself away further from her face, seeing a flashed Hanji. He smirks at the view and Hanji looked down into the ground with embarrassment.

“Deal?” he asked and Hanji let out a panic laugh.

“Of course! I can do something like that!” she tells him and scratched the back of her head.

“Then we should start having some fun now!” Georges tells her and offers his arm, which she took quickly and interlaced hers to his.

She has no idea what she will be experiencing for the day but no matter what it is, she could feel it deep into her heart that she would be definitely going to have some fun and one of the most memorable days of her life.

 

**-x-**

Hanji was not wrong about expecting things to very exciting but it turned out to be very fun as well. She didn’t expect that Georges has all the things that they could do written on his mind and all Hanji needed to do is to just agree or not. It had really made her feel so happy and even more excited because when she goes out with other guys she would always end up thinking everything for them to do for their walk or journey along the town. Sometimes, it makes her feel disappointed because she could feel that they are not that interested at all to roam around with her.

She shrugged the thought off, maybe because those guys were really close with her, which was Moblit, Mike, sometimes Erwin but mostly Levi.

Georges was different indeed. Aside from being prepared which she really liked because she too is not much prepared on what to do for a day, he hadn’t allowed her to pay anything when they had dinner on a comfortable restaurant and didn’t snorted at her pig style eating madness, finishing lots of plates while the man in front of her just stared in amazement as she finishes her meals.

After having an early dinner in a late afternoon, they had roamed around the busy town and Hanji looked from one booth to another. Georges saw how her face lit up when she saw cheap games and he paid for them so they could try. Hanji insisted of course but Georges didn’t mind and still paid so she has no choice but to play as well. Fortunately, they both received awards and thought of having it be given all to Georges since he is the one who paid but turned out that they just exchanged prizes instead. He didn’t want Hanji to go home without any prize or remembrance at all.

Whenever he feels or sees that she is interested with some food stall, he will automatically buy and hand it to over, her ceasing failing. She has no other choice but to accept his offers whole heartedly and ate the food that he buys for her.

“I’m sorry if my stomach is an endless pit.” She tells him while they were strolling down an alley where there are no people but only a few more booth stalls and lights, kids chasing around happily and other couples walking hand in hand.

Georges chuckled on her what she had said. “I don’t mind! It was really nice to see a person who loves to eat and appreciate food a lot and yet doesn’t even get extremely fat.”

Hanji stared at the taller man and felt her face flushed. She is not used for being praised except for being smart but she hearing how she is being praised for having a great body made her smile gleefully. She only managed to let out a small chuckle and stared at the night sky as they walk, admiring the view of the stars and the moon.

Georges saw the amazement on her eyes as they stroll the way and then decided to hold her wrist and pull her somewhere again.

“Come, we’re going to do something fun.” He tells her and she watched with a surprised face as he pulls her somewhere again. Somehow, she managed to feel calm and trust him whenever he mutter out those words.

They reached a stall that is a bit farther than the others but Georges kept Hanji away and bought something in the booth stall. He looks excited, extremely excited.

“Just wait here” he tells her and she agreed.

After a few minutes, he came back to her with two huge lanterns in hand.

“Georges…” she whispers as she stared in amazement on the lanterns that he is holding. “They look beautiful.” The lanterns were bright with an amount of fire inside.

Georges was staring at her face which was being lighted by the lanterns. She was too submerged into the lantern staring at it as if there’s no tomorrow.

“Hanji-san, would you to let go of it now?” he asked. She smiled at him in awe as he tried to call her by her first name. Her smile grew as she nodded and walked her towards open field nearby and joined her as they released their lanterns on the night sky.

Hanji can’t help herself in giggling and as the light that she was holding a few moments ago is now high on the night sky. Their lanterns twirled around each other until it reached fully on the night sky. It looked so incredible looking so great together with the stars.

Georges snaked his arms slowly behind her and instead of being surprised or being crept out like he is expecting, she encircled her arms around him and he returned the gesture with ease. Georges smiled to himself and didn’t let go of her.

They let each other go when they could no longer see their lanterns on the night sky, as the moonlight reflects together with a pair of grey eyes staring at their forms.

 

**-x-**

 

I don't know with you guys but I felt a bit sad that I received very few feedback in the previous chapter, bothered maybe since I kind of adore that chapter. Who doesn't love breast massages?

 

But seriously, it was okay, I was just surprised though and I hope you still liked that chapter though.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know with you guys but I felt a bit sad that I received very few feedback in the previous chapter, bothered maybe since I kind of adore that chapter. Who doesn't love breast massages?
> 
> But seriously, it was okay, I was just surprised though and I hope you still liked that chapter though.


	12. I Think It's Not to Be

**Chapter 12:**

**I Think It's Not to Be**  
  


**-x-**

Hanji was all too surprised to see for the past days that Levi has been spending more time with his squad, most especially with Petra. Maybe that was the same reason why he had suddenly stopped acting weirdly romantic with her like he did the past week and she didn’t know if she should be happy for him or not.

With the still confusion running on her head, she still clasped her hands and mentally pats her big ‘ol buddy Levi on the back.

She guesses that their secret agreement are about to end, and she was happy that they had loads of fun together and had took their friendship in a different level that she is sure nobody in the world has ever even shared.

She was also delighted that she was able to help him how to romance the girl he really liked, even if she is the tool for him to be a success on that.

**-x-**

 

Hanji had allowed the days passed to go by with Levi being the natural he is with her like he is with anyone else. Scowl looking face, empty of any emotion and not even visiting her in her room or asking for some sex. He also stopped acting like a monster over protective slash jealous freak towards her and let her do her own shit.

In truth, she was really surprised of the suddenness and confusion that he is doing to her but she didn’t let what she is feeling come into her surface and she acted like normal, carefree and unaffected.

Though she can’t help herself giving a few glances on Levi, with or without Petra on his side.

Things had started even getting more confusing when she was walking along the headquarters’ hallway towards her laboratory when Georges suddenly crept out beside her out of nowhere. She flashed him a smile and greeted.

“Good day Georges” she begun.

“Good day to you too, Bontaichou.” He said and smiled back. He took her hand and gave it a kiss, being the usual gentleman that he is.

“Are you going to be busy in your laboratory again, bontaichou?”

“Yes I will Georges”

“Are you going to need my help?”

Hanji stopped on her tracks and searched his face. “Maybe... but for now, not really. Moblit is in there and his effort is enough.”

“oh” he says in utter failure, tone sad enough for Hanji to feel.

“Cheer up Georges.” She held his shoulders and gave it a squeeze. “Look, I really appreciate your efforts and all your help but I-----“

Georges pulled her into a hard embrace and crashed his lips into hers. She squirmed uncomfortably under his tight hold but he tried his best to open her tight closed mouth. She tried to push him away but no matter how much she tried to push him away, he will tightened his hold on her even more. She was surprised about his actions because it was _only_ Levi who she kisses and is not used kissing other random soldier or any other man.

When she gave in and opened her mouth for him, feeling that it was pointless of keeping on pushing him away where in fact she can’t do, she felt his tongue explored her entire mouth and closed her eyes, feeling him inside of her. She tasted his mouth and felt his hands travel on her waist to make sure she won’t struggle and get out of his hold. He moaned while he kissed her and the poor woman shivered. Her hands were left on his chest and he presses her even harder against his body, and she is not sure if she likes it or not. When he pulls away from her mouth, he was breathless as well as her. Her cheeks flushed pink and Georges was somehow happy of what he did. He didn’t let go of her waist and forcefully searched her face.

He placed his forehead to hers and closed his eyes, as though nothing of his actions were wrong. “Buntaichou, I do not know why you won’t understand or see my advances to you. I know you liked me too so why did you hesitate on kissing me?” he asks. Hanji in return couldn’t answer him and only breathed heavily and fast.

“Hmm, maybe because you are surprised.” He says as he nuzzles his nose on her hair. “Look, I don’t care about other people will say about us, your squad or even that Levi Heichou” he snorts when he said his name, completely obvious of his like towards the other man. “I don’t like how close you are to him and how he looks at you like you are some kind of his possession that he doesn’t want to be touched.” So someone did saw how Levi had treated her a bit more romantic last week.

“He doesn’t look at me that way” she responded rather too quickly. She is sure that he is not as affectionate as he is during night time when they’re alone together and has been like an annoyance in his life every time the sun is up as she would tease and bother him--- except for the pass days where he had been sneaking up kisses and extra sweet and cuddly outside their rooms. But he just couldn’t be, he just couldn’t.

“Yes he does and it’s annoying. You shouldn’t be near him since he treats you like trash, and I hate men treating fine ladies like you as a trash. You deserve someone who appreciates you for who you are” he says; tone almost a whisper into her ears.

Hanji gulped hard and find it hard to look at him. He doesn’t know how much Levi cares for her and how they treat each other, not even a single idea from the very core of their relationship. She tried to give him a squirmy smile and shakily scrubs his broad chest.

“So what about it, can there be an ‘us’, buntaichou?” he whispers softly into her ears and traced her face. It gave her the creeps and she shivered involuntarily.

She cleared her throat. “Just, give me time to think about it and we can try to see if we can, is that alright Georges?”

He smiled gorgeously and planted a firm kiss on her lips. “Of course, we can try to find out as long as we are together.” He says and she nodded as she backed away a few steps from him.

“Very well then, I will see you tomorrow?” she asks.

Georges smirks as he tried to understand her part. _She is mort probably shocked of what I’ve done_ , he thought and let go of her hand.

“Why is that, my love?”

Hanji cannot hide her red face as he mentioned that word of love. That very word made her mind dizzy and clouded with confusion.

“I..I have to really focus with a few works on the lab, and it would make me think better of your offer, Georges” she said in the nicest way as possible so she won’t get him mad. If she can’t fight him when he forcefully kissed her, what more if he gets mad and got out of control?

“Of course, anything you want, my love” he took her other hand and gave it a kiss. “I’ll see you tomorrow then.” He winked at her and went to start walking in the opposite side of the hallway. “I would be busy with my squad, I almost forgot that too.”

She nodded and gave him a sweet smile as she tilts her head.

“I love you” he whispers and he went on his path.

She was stunned of how he had murmured it to her, so sweet and her heart skipped a beat. She has been reminded that she too was a woman who needs to be loved, not just a woman who is to be forgotten. She never knew that someone is brave enough to say something so sweet to her and she wanted to hear more of that word too. She blushed and waved goodbye.

It was so surreal then suddenly, it felt like all her fears were suddenly gone. She was never told by that word by any man in her life before, and it felt great to be told that you are wanted, that you are loved, that someone actually loves her beyond of what she looked like and or what she is like.

She went to start walking towards her laboratory, thinking of what had just happened.

He was unlike Levi.

Levi maybe not vocal but sure doesn’t treat her like a respected woman at all. He just uses her for his sexual desires, like she had agreed to that as well so won’t blame him, and how she had treated her like some kind of pig about her stink and being dirty and makes her feel like an annoyance to the world. He would even scold her in front of a lot of people as well, humiliating her in the process as though she was a misbehaving child. She couldn’t even remember Levi thanking her for her voluntary service for him as well. She had cared for him too much and had been affectionate to him as much as she can even in public but he does was the opposite and would do the same thing she does when they’re inside their rooms. Why? Is he scared of telling that she is his woman, even not formally so no gossips would circulate? Is she that unsatisfying?

What if, just what if, she would try it with Georges, try a new thing, a new chapter in her life, and being in a complete serious relationship with someone who will respect her and love her.

The feeling was both nice and wonderful, but a bit scary as well.

She did tried a different thing with Levi, maybe Georges would be a little better.

She just needed to make sure and do something to prove it to herself first.

Everything needs to end and she must end it with a proper goodbye, tonight.

 

**-x-**

Levi had been busy spending time with his squad since he wanted to finish his business with them. The most awaited time arrived for him to rest and fix himself, he was startled when he entered his room to see Hanji reading a book, shirt opened, exposing her bra and underwear, glasses on the tip of her nose. She smiled and stretched out her hands when Levi came in. This could only mean one thing, he thought. After days and nights of long months of not talking to her and not having sex, he felt really thrilled and excited to work inside her and wake up by her side.

“Hey there” she tells him. He only smirked and removed his clothes, all of it and left them all on the floor. She placed her hands down when he didn’t gave her the hug she wanted but kissed her remarkably soft into her lips.

“What are you up to?” he asks.

“I wanted to hug you” she said in frustration.

“You don’t need it when I start to kiss and eat you.” That made Hanji’s heart a bit hurt. _Lust, just full of lust, not love,_ her mind whispers to her heart, reminding her the reason why she should choose Georges instead _._

He has never been contented with hugs and would always prefer kisses, she reminds herself. Embrace is different from a kiss. It was a very comforting act and she really needs one right now. It is one sweet gesture that is being shared and done of appreciation and comfort, and he can’t give it to her to even satisfy his needs. Not that she doesn’t like the way he kisses her but she was expecting something that will show her that he loves her even just a tiny bit and that he doesn’t see her like some kind of a sex toy.

“Oh yeah” she lunges at him and landed on top of him, deciding to play the game for a little while. He settles his hands on her hips and she removed her opened shirt and bra and threw it on the floor.

“In this cold weather, I want your warmth all over my body tonight” she whispers at his ear as she brought her face closer to him and looked at him temptingly.

When he licked his lips, Hanji thought it was great that he is in the mood right now to have sex, just as she had planned. She lowered herself and kissed him harshly, capturing his lips, entering his mouth with her tongue, kissing him feverishly with all her might. She pulled away to remove his upper clothing slowly without breaking her stare at him and just about time that she can’t breathe anymore.

Levi got anxious that at that very moment and immediately pulled her naked body into his as he captured her lips once again. The kiss was full of want and desire, disappointment and of concern. He locked his arms on her body as she placed her hands on his head, fingers gently gripping on his hair and earnestly kissing him back. Alternately he did his magic on her, kissing her as he massaged her breasts. He could feel her scrubbing her legs on his and it is making him shiver more in pure ecstasy.

Levi missed her so much. As much as he wanted to have sex, he would always only wait for her to start the flame and never had asked her first nor urged to have sex with, he would just wait for her to ask or invite him in bed. But after a month or two of not having sex together, he suddenly found himself pulling himself together and gather all of his will to show her that he _misses_ being with her. It was just so sudden that she became discreet in having physical intimacy with him, no matter how small it was and had been a bit distant compared before, before Georges came. He is fully aware of his motives on her as well as his advancements, and he is not in favor of those actions of his.

He missed feeling her lips on his, massaging it and tasting her with all glory. He missed being inside her as she goes crazily overwhelmed with joy when she entertains him and enters her. He misses her every touch on his skin, her pressed kisses on his neck, the feeling of rubbing her cheek on his and he misses her scent. He misses her embrace and he just misses the ever follow up sneak kiss after their love making. Most of all, he just misses her and her presence. Her laughter that he barely hears which he was the reason of her own laughter, and that smile that she only gives to him.

For the past months and weeks, he had been tortured of waiting for her presence, to have her be embraced and be there to be hugged. Every day, he had wished he could hug and kiss her again but he would always tend to see her with Georges or with her squad or her work. He would also pretend to feel her hair on his hands and remember the feeling of her whispering to his ear, telling him how much she wished to sleep with him afterwards at night.

Now that she is here on his arms, he wanted her to feel what they have missed and that he just missed her so much. She was like the very dessert that he had always yearned for every hectic day, a reward to receive after such busy day of hard work. He had just only wanted to be with her right in an instant after a busy day and sleep with her until dawn. He missed hearing her stories of her day and her researches. Right now sit h moment to bring back the flame that the only two of them shared to each other.

He tugged his hand on to her hair and pulled it out from its ponytail and had it dangle along her shoulders as he continued to devour her mouth. She still tastes lovely as ever and was so happy that she is here tonight, glad that they can do this again tonight as well. They adjusted comfortably as he sat properly and she follows his lead, sitting on top of him gently. He carefully traced her bare back, sending shivers down her spine and she pulled away to look at him for a few seconds. He stood back and smirked, that made her smile. Levi being gorgeous as ever and she captured his lips again until she pressed kisses onto his chest. He closed his eyes, held her hair gently as he could with his hand as she pulls his lower clothing and have it removed so she could stroke and kiss him below. It greatly turned him on and it made him growl like a wild beast.

He was becoming too hard but Hanji didn’t stopped playing and sucking on him below. When his hot release suddenly burst into her throat, she didn’t pulled back and swallowed it all whole, drying him out, like he secretly wanted her to do. It made him exhausted but he squeezed her butt and carried her down to the pillows. It made her giggle and Levi can’t help not to smile, she was just a pure bliss to his life.

He started to kiss her forehead very lightly and she shut her eyes slowly as he did so. He trailed a finger into her cheek and exchanged it with his lips, placing a light feathered kiss in there as well, a gratitude for making him in pure ecstasy and feeling blessed again. She clung tightly onto his shoulders and tightly shut her eyes as he places a finger inside of her and moved inside of her, giving back the same feeling of ecstasy that she had him feel.

Hanji was feeling hot and damn sexy, a feeling that Levi never fails to make her feel when they are doing this, not uncomfortable and lost, but connected and grateful. It was tormenting her, she wanted to prove to herself that all he wanted with her is nothing but lust and her body, not her totality and her heart. But now that they are once again making love, she could actually feel him being happy and see that he wanted to please her as well, not just to please himself, that she feels an odd bond and connection with this kind of doing. It’s as though she feels like she is being pulled back to the place where she belongs, into his arms and his mighty chest where she perfectly knows that she is safe.

She wonders why she is feeling this way, so confused about a man who she promised to help with his physical release and should be just working on her lab, finding out an answer to end the titan’s reign in this world, not finding out a way to answer her heart’s problem out.

She got back to reality when a hard and long organ entered her, making her moan and deepen her nails into his shoulders. He slowly entered her thoroughly and watched her be filled by him. When the pain was gone, Levi moved his hips in a moderate speed and listened to her moans. Hearing her like that urged him to move faster, harder, until she jolts and arch her back, exhaling after the long minutes of having him work inside of her. She hooked her legs around his waist and urged him to go faster and deeper. When she let of her own juices, he pulls out and spread everything on the bed sheet. He shivered and yelped but it can’t be help, besides he can clean it the following day. He just wanted to be connected and be one again with her tonight.

He settles his head on her chest and she places her chin on the top of his head, caressing his hair, lightly kissing the top of his head. It felt so surreal, the only place and time he knew he could be protected and loved, be taken care of. He may the strongest living man but he too will need someone to protect him, even just make him feel needed would be enough, and he knew no one except for Hanji alone.

He tightened his embrace on her, afraid of losing her. Should he say it now? He fears it’s too late. But how, how could he tell her? How could he reach out to her heart? Is love making not enough? Is she that blind? He never wanted to lose her, but what if he tells it to her and she didn’t like the idea of being stable with their relationship?

She suddenly moves and leans closer to his ear. “I know it’s your favorite to work me out from the back.” She says and he looks at her deep in her eyes for confirmation. She grinned at him and kissed his nose. “Go on, Mr. World strongest” he nodded and she turned her back to him. When she was about to kneel by her knees, he stops her and pushes her body lightly back to the mattress flatly. He didn’t want to strain her but he can work her out from the back even if she is lying flatly on the bed.

He first places his two fingers slowly inside of her again, moving and she moans in delight, tugging her fingers deep on the pillows. As he moves a few fingers inside of her, he gives her shoulders, her neck, her cheek soft kisses and even run down a couple of more kisses on her spine. He wanted to let her know, and he is hoping he is telling it her right now.

As she feels his lips work in her entire body as he works his fingers inside of her, she bit her lip to stop moaning and she thought, he never asks her what she wanted to do and just let him do what he wanted for them both. But thinking about it, he had kissed her tonight more than he ever did before. Why? Does that mean anything? And he was even more gentle with her tonight, from the way he holds her, licks her and even moves inside of her, he had been extra cautious and she was surprised. Why the sudden change from being hard and uneasy to being gentle and slow?

When she was too slippery already, his fingers were then changed by his long and hard penis and moved slowly inside of her. He started to thrust, to move carefully then into a desirable speed, enough to make her moan again with delight. He even managed to massage her breast firmly with his hands and place a kiss below her ears. Tonight he is just too... gentle, too sweet, and extra cautious, she thinks.

She was already close again to her limit when he pulls out of her and releases on the same spot of the bed. He knew that he released first before she even reaches her own and in return, he massages her below, enough to calm her down and he started licking her, sucking her so she could reach her limit and squirt her release when she arched her body, her legs barely even felt as a whole but as jellies. He was sorry but managed to come up with it and she was thankful. She knew that he is the only one who could know that about her, about what to do next when that kind of a problem happens.

He moved beside her and drape an arm around her, looking straight into her eyes. He hoped that she isn’t that exhausted so he could finally say it to her by heart about how he feels. If he never wanted to be parted away from her, he should do it, just tell her about how he sees her strangely beautiful among woman, how amazing she is in everything that she does, how he thinks that they are a perfect match for each other, and that he want no one else to share everything with except with her.

That his brain and heart are now joining forces and is telling him that he is now seriously falling for her, that he didn’t mean it but he is not sorry for it either. That he wanted to take her seriously and protect her and do his best to show her that he loves her.

He pulls her chin to look at her straight in the eye and opened his lips to mumble her name but she suddenly sat straight in bed as he watches her. She seemed nervous, hugging her knees under the sheet and she can’t meet his gaze. It’s as though she wanted to tell him something too, so he let her talk first. He did the same, sat up and placed an arm around her shoulders and brought her closer to him.

“You wanted to say something, go tell it to me” he says and she carefully moved her head towards his direction. She was feeling tense and nervous about something, she was trembling under his hold and he is aware of it, and it’s not the after effect of their love making.

She gathered all her strength. She had to, wanted to and sure of it as well. She had given him a chance to prove himself worthy for her and this time, she wanted to have Georges have the same opportunity to prove himself worthy. It should not always just Levi, besides, he hasn’t been much like a concerned lover or even close to that, just a man who needs a release.

Just a friend, who has extra needs to be achieved at nights.

It made her heart skip a beat. She persuaded herself that he won’t get hurt if he doesn’t really love her, maybe sting very, very little of the suddenness but sure it won’t hurt as hell since she is nothing for him but just a toy. She has to stop it for now, maybe for good. Maybe Georges will do better. She knew deep inside that it’ll be a bit hard to stop herself from looking for his touches and kisses but she is sure she can handle and forget all of those. Georges looks more serious than Georges about her, and she convinces herself that her decision is right.

“We should stop doing this.” She tells him and his eyes widen a bit, his caressing fingers on her shoulder stopped.

His heart shattered into pieces and he could swear that the world stopped spinning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!  
> First of all, I would really want to take this out of my chest first.  
> I feel really horrible. About the fact that I am too tired on my job, (to think this is my very first year of professional teaching), underpaid, forced like shit like I shouldn’t commit mistakes, win the hearts of my students, being treated like shit or even being bullied by the older ones in the faculty, that I don’t want to always get mad but in every classroom, there would be someone capable of making a huge chaos and bother you in your lesson proper. Subject heads should be pleased most importantly the principal, students, their parents and yet we, the new and younger ones, gets to be treated like that.  
> Fuck.  
> I suddenly felt numb like I don’t care about anything anymore, or what would happen to me or my student. I know I shouldn’t feel this way but it is making me feel emotionally exhausted. Just one fucking mistake of a top list student, a parent would immediately bombard you with tons of hellish questions. Just what the fuck? Then, the older faculty shitheads will start gossiping about you and hell.  
> I really didn’t know working life will be like this. Being a student is way easier. I just hope I stay young. I’m in my 19th year and 24 months of living but urgh. At least I am still a teen… bwahaha. Kidding. I still think and act like a teen by when it comes to my profession, I act like a true professional of course.  
> But now, it’s like everything is falling out of place. I am losing the true essence of my career.  
> And my five to nine year old grade school students are the ones who will catch my anger or my distress.  
> Anyway.  
> I know, I know. This chapter is like a blah. But I swear you ain’t see nothin’ yet hope you stay tune and find out what will happen next in the following chapters. haha. :3  
> Gotta admit, I’m not satisfied with their sex scene here since there are more to come and I promise to make them better than this one. Though Hanji had lost the interest to Levi so that’s why she can’t really be that hot on the bed at that very moment.   
> I also have a feeling that I should stop it right there and continue the rest with the next chapters so yeah.  
> Hope you had a great time reading.   
> And thank you for reading my rant or whatsoever. 
> 
> xoxo  
> LadyinBlack


	13. No, I Think Not, It's Never to Become For I am Not the One

**Chapter 13:**

**No, I Think Not, It's Never to Become  
For I am Not the One**

 

 

**-x-**

Hearing Hanji say that everything between them should be stopped ripped his heart, hard. If only it could be heard, it would break all the ears of the entire people in the headquarters. Was he late? But why?

“Georges has been very serious in reaching out on me Levi, and I don’t think, I mean, I want to give him the opportunity, the chance to reach out with me. In order to do that, I wanted to devote myself entirely to him, not to anyone else just like he does. He has been really amazing and great with me Levi and it breaks my heart that I am doing this kind of thing with you as I let him court me.” She saw him didn’t moved, eyes hidden underneath his laying hair by his forehead. Where did he had done it wrong? He wanted to restart time and do things all over again.

“I, I guess I wanted to be loved Levi, not just be towed around anywhere inside the headquarters and be fucked hard by the Recon Corps’ captain. I am more than that, I am better than just a toy or some fucking buddy and I believe Georges could make me feel wanted and loved. He makes me feel beautiful and respected, unlike this.” She waves her hands and Levi still didn’t moved. He can’t believe he is hearing this.

“I feel dirty with this, even if I did agreed with this and I only do it with you, I think this should just stop. Let’s just stop. Let’s just stop whatever this is that we have. I wanted someone who will do great _with_ me, not use me to feel great and then leave me when you find someone better. Because I know sooner or later, you too will find some who you will love and will leave me torn and broken, used like a ragged doll. I deserve more than that Levi, so please let’s stop already.” Hanji searched his face but couldn’t see behind his laying hair. “I am also a woman, Levi. I deserved to be loved just like other women as well” She added as she touched his arm around her shoulder and he still didn’t moved a muscle.

“I really thought this over Levi, I really did. I don’t think I could fall to someone who only wanted me for my body and then throw me after I am done with. Levi, I’m really sorry. I really do. But as we end this, I hope I had done my duty for you well.” She gently embraced him and stood a bit higher on her sit and places a very soft kiss on the top of his head. It was hard for him to understand and take it in. She somehow feels really sorry about him but partly, she didn’t want to. He’s a tough man, world’s strongest and she is sure that he can handle anything for himself. He could get another woman for his needs and let her go. Besides, she’s not the only woman left in the world to give in to his needs.

Levi is feeling confused, and being broken he can’t move a muscle. His mind is slowly being clouded with question and uncertainty. So she didn’t feel loved and respected with him? She thought he would just throw her away and say ‘thanks for your cooperation, for fucking with me because I already found someone to love with’ and move on?

Didn’t she know of a possibility of him falling for her already?

That he actually is really falling for her? That she is the one he is thinking every time he not thinking about work? That he always yearn for her presence and do nothing but to lay on the bed with her?

So his actions were not enough that Georges now won her over to him. But he loves her, and he wanted her to be happy. As long as she’s there, smiling and living, breathing calling out his name even if she has found somebody else, it’s fine for him but fuck, his heart ache and it’s darn painfully inside his chest. He wanted to rip it out and throw it so he won’t get bugged by it’s painful beatings. He never knew that broken hearts could bring pain like this to a person. He is the World’s Strongest but he too is open for pain.

He loves her, now he is sure of it and regrets every minute of their time together that he failed to make her feel special, love and wanted. He blames it to never being loved since he was a child, maybe that’s the reason now that he can’t and doesn’t know how to show her what love is.

A gentle kiss on the cheek brought him back to reality and saw Hanji, now all dressed up and is leaning near him, then bringing her hands to cup his face. He felt his eyes blink again, since he was left with his eyes open staring to nothing as she spoke and explain. He didn’t even noticed that she had worn her clothes back again.

He just can’t believe it, how can she just do that?

“It doesn’t mean that I can’t say it like he does doesn’t mean I couldn’t feel the same towards you, Hanji.” He tells her, his voice tainted with brokenness and she suddenly stopped moving and caressing his cheek, her smile looping down to the floor.

“W-what?” she asked breathlessly. “What did you jus---“

“You heard me.” And brought his eyes to catch hers. He watched as her eyes dingle with surprise.

“I just can’t fucking tell you, and I thought what we were doing was enough to tell you about----“ he gritted his teeth and his fists both balled into anger.

“About? About what Levi?” she asked while both of her hands held her chest tightly. This is not Levi, but a possessed Levi all over again, not knowing who he is and losing himself entirely, doing something that he shouldn’t be doing.

“About how you are annoyingly the center of my life and make my heart get so fucking hyper whenever I am going to see.” He admitted and looked away, anywhere but not her. “That I always get so fucking excited to just open my shitty eyes every morning because I will get to talk to you again and hold you at night. I know I thought the world had been too greedy to me but having my life here and sharing a kind of life with you that I never imagine was just too impossible to ignore you know?”

Hanji had her mouth dropped open on what he had said. Is he confessing to her? Not just any ordinary confession but seriously, is he telling her that he _fancies_ her? Heck she can’t even say it, she can’t accept that he is feeling this way towards her.

“You’re too fucking impossible not to make me feel so _into_ you” he blurted it out fast and looked away, can’t believe that he let those words slip out of his mouth.

“Maybe it was just the sex Levi.” She chuckled nervously and hoped he agreed. To her dismay, he didn’t.

Levi could already feel his knees buckle and shake, he swears that his face is fucking red and he looked stupidly insane right. He is not even wearing anything in front of her, like it matters anyway, like how they are really open to one another like nobody else can and think that they are fucking insane. But the only thing that makes sense right now is that he didn’t want to lose her, and that she needed to know at the very instance.

Hanji in turn was starting to feel outraged and nervous, she had never thought that Levi could possibly like her. She wanted to spank her face or just lock herself inside the bathroom until Levi gives up on telling her how he feels for her. She had never thought that this could happen to her.

“No it wasn’t just fucking sex Hanji, I’m not stupid. Doesn’t mean I am not educated in the way as yours doesn’t mean I am stupid enough to understand what I feel.” Levi continued and Hanji backed away from him a little, scared of whatever words he might still added.

“The moment that fucking asshole Georges emerged in the Corps had threatened me of losing you. I thought I’d never lose you to anyone, I thought you _feel the same fucking way for me._ You even completed me, and I swear I feel so fucked right now because I don’t really want you to just go out there and act like you don’t mean anything to me.” He mumbled the last phase a bit in a whimper, cannot find the same amount of strength as he had mumbled his first words.

“I thought that the bond and ways we have were enough for you to know how you mean to me.” Levi’s face fell on the floor, hurt and broken and he can’t pick up the shattered pieces anymore. “When I saw him making advances to you and saw you liking him very much as he does to you, I tried my best to show the same affection that he does, and I was hoping you could somehow feel it, that I meant _more than just this._ ”

Levi stared back at the woman he is now confessing his heart at and all he could see from her face was disappointment? Sadness? Torment? Or all three? He doesn’t know and he doesn’t want to know, he can even barely feel his self now, what more knowing about hers.

“I guess, I am fucking late now am I?” he asked her, trying to force himself to smile in which he barely, really can’t. “I can see that fucking asshole has won, I even thought that having our friendship, comaradity and bond would make me have you, make you feel the same fucking way as I feel for you.” There was pain and anguish in his voice and Hanji had sensed it.

Hanji now is starting to feel guilty and most of all, in pain. She had thought all along that Levi liked Petra, not her. She doesn’t have anything special onto her, just as he would say to her. That she smelled a lot like shit all the time, that hair is already oily and greasy, that she too is too eccentric and he can’t understand why she could learn to love titans, her addiction to science and her shitty glasses everytime they are having sex, that it blocks him from kissing her directly.

“But,” she started, voice a bit wobbly. “isn’t Petra the one you liked? The way you look at her really is----“

“No fucking way. She is beautiful yeah but she is not the type that I think I’d fall in love with.”

“But you always tell me that I smell!”

“You don’t have any idea that I don’t care if you smell! As long as it is yours, that when I smell your skin or your scent I know it’s you and no fucking else! The only why I always tell you that because I wanted you to take a fucking bath, get clean because you’re going to smell better! But it doesn’t mean I don’t like how you naturally smell you idiot!”

“You told me I am weird!”

“You did told me too! Did you even forgot what you told me when you first said that I am weird?” he stopped and searched her face. She opened her mouth to try and give an answer but nothing came out.

“You said that I am weird but you like me, you idiotic shitty glasses!” Levi’s fist balled hard, his eyes shaking in determination to reach out deep inside of her.

Hanji gasped, suddenly remembering that memory as though it was some sort of a replay on her mind. It was also too clear and right now, how could she even have forgotten?

Levi still thought of a few more things, he just can’t let her slip away from him that easily that he wasn’t even able to control his mouth from speaking like hell. “I don’t want anyone to take my place in your arms and unlike him, I don’t have anything to offer but me, myself and my fucking heart.”

She stared out at Levi with nervousness on her lips, not knowing what to say. She feel guilty and ashamed of herself, how could she? How could she even be so insensitive? She guesses that she is not only blind, but her heartless as well.

“I’m sorry” she mumbles, looking down to her feet, tears starting to swell up at the end of her eyes. “I still want to say thank you for understanding too, Levi. We’ll still stay friends” she tells him, hoping it will fix things up even a bit.

“Don’t be. I guess I should be the one apologizing.” Levi countered, focusing entirely on her apology and turned on his back, opening the door to the rest room. “Just go and do what you think is best. But just remember Hanji, I’m always here, most especially if you need me.” He said it from the bottom of his heart and he is being honest with it. Somehow, he doesn’t want to totally lose her, that even if he will only stay as a friend in her eyes, that she can still depend on him.

With that, he enters the bathroom and locked it with all his might.

 

 

**-x-**

The first days without Hanji by his side was pretty hard and all new to him. She just gladly went to continue on her days without even talking to him and had always been with Georges most of the time around the HQ. He would still go and attend on her needs and help her as much as he can, irritating Moblit in the process because he knew that he would just flirt with Hanji.

Levi would often see them eat together and even have their squads train together and seemed like the two squads really goes well together. With that, he could clearly see how Georges sneakily holds Hanji’s hand, nuzzle his nose on her cheek and even how he smell her hair. Hanji doesn’t seem to care at all and just laugh with whatever it is that Georges sneakily does to her. She doesn’t seem to hate it nor like it, he can’t tell by the way she looks. But if she doesn’t push him away, then maybe she doesn’t mind it at all. He wanted to fucking tear everything apart with his are hands and imagine it is the face of Georges.

Georges will also usually taps her head and give her shoulder massages anytime when she feels a bit down or tired, and he does it even they are in public. Fortunately, Levi has never seen them kissed even in the cheek which made him breathe easily. Sometimes, Hanji will give him a hug which seems not that intense since she will break it very fast, getting away from Georges’ stickier hugs.

The way he sees her being alright that getting away from as though was not a big deal to her made his heart sank, even from the way she smiles and laugh which he no longer receive and knew that he is no longer the reason made him miss her even more. He longs for her gentle holds, light touches, gentle kisses and her ever warming hugs. He misses the conversations that they share as she tells him about the new book that she is reading and about her recent researches about the titans. He misses the smell of her hair, her tight vagina and her moans on his ears.

He fucking misses her.

He miss hugging her and caress her lips with his, making him calm and at peace. He misses the feel of his hands on her waist and loving her figure and caressing her breast. He miss the beatings of her heart and her silent breathing when he would wake up first before her. He miss the way she hangs her body on his arms when he is carrying her and lightly brings her to bed and consume her with much excitement and anticipation.

He just miss every bit of her and their time together.

The moment she left him, he found himself turning and turning around his bed a hundred times before he even gets to sleep. He finds more and more things irritating and had his squad be lectured all the time. His squad would even complain how he acted like some darn old freak and will ask them to clean thrice a week. He would often look out at the office window longer than listening to whoever it is that is speaking everytime that they are going to have a meeting. He would even always snort when Georges’ name is mentioned and would always find it hard to move when Hanji’s name is the one mentioned to him.

He sighed, he should have let her know of his feelings a bit early, now everything is too late.

She won’t even talk to him nor approach him and even if he said that he is still willing to help her out in everything that she would ask for, she never did, for once, for the entire month that they had ended ‘it’, ask him for some help even from carrying boxes or books or any small thing. She is a strong woman and he knows it but he also knows that there will be a time that she will be asking for a little bit of assistance, but that moment didn’t seemed to come. He finds it a suicide whenever he tries to reach out to her and will awkwardly send him away and had decided to not to get close her anymore and forget her just like she does to him.

He was left to nothing but to watch her everytime he is going to see her and do his best to fight his beating heart and walk away from her so the pain would be less excruciating.

 

**-x-**

Levi thought things clearly all over again despite the pain he is feeling on his heart on night, staring at the towel that he took from her that is setting on top of his bedside table as he drank his cup of tea in a way he usually does.

He thought about everything.

First, he tried to recall their bond, their friendship, their comradeship and their memories together. The time they had spent being drenched in under the rain after being separated with the others in one mission, how she tried to befriend him in his very first mission and even tried to befriend Isabel and Farlan which he is really happy because Isabel was treated nicely and had struck to her big time. He remembered how they had confessed to each other that they had given their virginity to each other which he was really surprised about but at the same time, happy for she won’t be able to give it to any other man except for him after her usual pranks to him and then ending up that way. He spend more time thinking of her smiles for his scowl and when he tries to make her smile and make her feel out of stress and make her feel better.

They even agreed to have an open relationship, comrades and friends when the sun and people are around but like lovers when they are not around them and when the darkness is ready to surround them. Throughout the time, they had exchanged secrets and stories and had helped one another. They wouldn’t deny that they too are masterminds of some crimes, like disobeying Erwin and making their own solution for a specific problem. They had each other’s backs from all the small to bigger shits, from inside and outside the walls. Individually they are strong, but together they are invincible. They had opened to one another about everything, and he thought everything that they had was enough.

He thought he already had her for real, that no one would be able to get her away from him.

And then, the ugly truth comes to haunt him.

He had forgotten that Hanji is educated, unlike him. She came from a very responsible and afford family who had given her a great life, sent her into school that had fulfilled her hungry life of learning. She had acquaintances and some friends who had given her cherishing memories as well and overall, she had an amazing secured life. Unlike him, who came from the Underground, a son of a kind and loving prostitute who died and was left to be raised as a predator by his very own uncle who rarely even treated him like a child. He didn’t owned anything like Hanji, he lived life without anything. Even the only ones that he had in life left him for good, and he can’t even protect them nor do anything to stop them from leaving him.

And now it’s happening again. He can’t do anything to have her stay with him.

He had even accepted the small things different from the both of them to convince himself that they really are not meant for each other, and that she is now in the hands of someone else. He convinced himself that she doesn’t deserve a thrash like him, who’s got nothing but an empty title.

And he has no other choice, so he drank the last drop of his tea and accepted their differences.

That they were never meant to be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -x-
> 
> Look, I know this chapter is really short but I really need to cut it here.  
> Anyways, I am happy I still managed to edit a few more things.  
> Thank you so much for all the kind words guys! I’d reply to all of you one by one soon, it’s just it’s too late tonight and I feel so tired.   
> See you in the next chapter though!


	14. The Worst is Just Around the Bend

**Chapter 14:**

**The Worst is Just Around the Bend**  
  


**-x-**

Hanji was not blind enough to see how Levi would give out his casual blank stares but ended up dropping his eyes on the floor and looking broken after seeing her with Georges. Even if she wanted to be that blind so that she would no longer have to see how Levi’s eyes softens and saddens because of her. She knew exactly that it was because of her after he sees her with Georges and she can’t help but feel guilty.

It was not only Levi who seems to be being blown away of her constant mingling with Georges, but also her research and studies about the titans. Moblit is constantly being asked to go away and being replaced by Georges to help and assist Hanji. The poor blond would always go away feeling useless where everyone had always viewed and know that he is supposed to help Hanji at all cost, and he now fears that he is not doing his job.

Erwin also raised a brow when Hanji told him of Georges advances to her and that she plans to agree on his advancements, and she looked adoringly stupid with her hands clasped, jumping in the balls of her feet, telling him that she feels like she is a princess in the story. What Erwin sees is that Hanji has been, for the very first time, being pulled away from her duties in the Survey Corps and would mostly be absent or not around her laboratory and mostly, meetings every now and then. Whenever she is to be looked for, the younger recruits will often tell him that she is with Georges, smooching here and there and he is not happy about such news, shaking his head and sighed, giving her the opportunity to feel loved, as she would always tell him. She would also always pass papers late and it made Erwin tell her of her new found behaviour, and Hanji was greatly saddened by what she had heard.

“Being loved is not bad Hanji but I am reminding you of your role as a buntaichou.” Erwin once told her when he suddenly reached to his limits and confront her of her behaviour. “I always knew that you are a responsible person Hanji, but now you are allowing yourself to be pulled away and act like some kind of a nosy, irresponsible teenager” Hanji was in the verge of tears and Erwin walks away, not wanting to see how she would react of what he had told her.

It has been a month after she ended the kind of relationship that she has with Levi, she had allowed Georges to snuggle closer to her when they are alone, nuzzle his nose on her, hold her hand, massage her back and shoulder after a long day’s work inside the laboratory, tap her head and even carry her to sleep. What she doesn’t understand is why she won’t lean in against any of his touches to her. Georges did seem to felt and see that so he never stole a kiss on her lips but sometimes plants an unexpected kiss on her cheek. She would laugh or chuckle nervously and tremble on his embraces. She even gave Georges the liberty to call her in her given name of Zoe, or any other cheesy names that sounded too girly for her ears.

She had been used with her surname to call to her since everybody knew how much she is in favour of neutral gender and opened up that she feels like a man sometimes and a woman, that she did not cared at all because she is who she is, even Levi knows that and agrees to that and told her of being open minded and all. He even joked to her that ‘a fucking straight woman everytime you’re with me, most especially when we have our _very_ private time alone.’ A faint smile crossed her lips, remembering those funny memories she had with the midget captain.

But the time she explained that part to Georges, he suddenly jerked of, pursued his lips and told her that ‘I want you to be a woman, a real, straight woman and you are my woman so you need to be viewed as a woman, not some open freakish gay’. She was saddened to hear that since being gay is not much a big deal for her, and whether she is gay or not, she wanted to be loved being that way, not being forced into something she isn’t comfortable with. Being a man and a woman is who she really is and she loved being that way, being the best with two worlds. She didn’t expect him to act this way towards her view about fair gender views and she can’t help but to feel sad. She smiled despite of Georges being that way, she knew that there would still be a hundred reasons why she loved Georges and promised herself not to bring that topic up ever again so she hopelessly agreed to his favor.

She also realizes that this is Georges, not Levi and she should be used to it if she wanted to have a stable relationship with him, like any woman always wanted, a stable man on her life. But things change and would become unpredictable when she least expects it.

She understands the need of him keeping distance from her but somehow, she finds it a bit painful. Levi has been a huge part of her life, even shared her big firsts with him and it’s impossible to think that she herself is not even hurt of their agreed, low goodbyes. Somewhere in her heart, she hopes that he is not suffering the same feeling of pain and confusion like she does and wishes him every single day.

Conversations has always been easy with Georges but once that they were having a long conversation in the middle of a hot afternoon and he suddenly tells her something that rang her ears terribly. “Look Zoe, I am the type of man who always gives the best for the woman I wanted to share my life with but I also irritably have short patience when it comes to things like this. I give my best, make you feel special and loved but I don’t want to keep waiting forever.”

Hanji looked upon him quizzically, wondering. “What are you trying to say, Georges?” she asks him, finding herself chuckling a bit but can’t contain the shiver that just let out along her spine unexpectedly. Her heart suddenly beat fast, feeling as though something isn’t right. For the past days that she had been spending more time with Georges, more time even than that of her researches, she had found herself experiencing this kind of unwanted feeling, that she would shiver or wobble so suddenly and would force herself to stop and calm herself down. She had also felt that she is a bit irritable and can’t help feeling like something, somewhere where she is doing, there’s something wrong.

What made her feel that way even more is how he would get mad like hell when she would tell him that she can’t go and be with him and that she is busy, telling her that he is too tired of always adjusting into her schedule of everyday so she is forced to drop her notes and other stuffs and go grab his hand instead. She would even feel more troubled when Moblit will come and go look for her. She would see him, and she would also see him sigh and go away without her then would find out that Erwin had gotten mad of the other blonde.

Poor Moblit.

Maybe Georges was wrong for her all along.

She shook her head and focused on the man right in front of her, reminding herself that _this_ is what she wanted and who she chose. She wanted to settle down, be admired, be respected, be treated like a real woman and be _loved,_ most especially for who she is.

Thinking about it, she recalled how Levi’s presence has been very much comforting and the possibility of him loving her back, then remembered how he sex her up most nights, remembering how much of a coordinating toy she was for him after all.

She smiled warmly at Georges and he gave him a soft look. “That I don’t want to be kept waiting for you, Zoe. I only have a limit and I want to know if you are interested on me or not.”

“And how long is this limit of yours, Georges?” Hanji, a bit shuddered and surprise of what she just heard.

“Four months, Zoe” he said, with a matching showing of his four fingers right to her face. She didn’t smiled nor grinned but only looked at him behind her glasses, looking straight and serious.

“Oh” she manages to say and tucked her glasses closer to her eyes. “And what if I can’t give you an answer within those required months of yours?” she asks, sounding a bit challenging but she can’t herself. She knows that being a gentleman doesn’t need a month limit or some kind of shit like that if he is courting a woman, and he is not even speaking gentle this time to her. He sounds pushy and she didn’t like it.

He smirked at her and slowly made his way towards her with slow coordinated steps. She didn’t feel threatened or worried if he is to do something kinky or unwanted towards her, she know what to do if he would do such thing towards her. Instead, as she watches him with serious and straight eyes and finally reaching her, he stretched his hand towards her face and tucked a hair gently behind her ears. He leans slowly into her ear.

“I doubt that” he whispers and kissed her on the cheek. He winked at her and went out of the room, as Hanji fumed when she was left all alone.

She didn’t wanted to get mad but he is doing things that is making her mad. Why does he need to be forceful and tells her that he should only court her for four months? She wanted to know more about him because even she let herself go to Levi, it took them for six years before he even started kissing and sexing her up because she had known and trusted Levi for years. Fuck, he is the person who she really trusted the most and having sex with him is not a regretful thing that she shared with him. If she is to trust Georges, most especially that this is going to be her first serious relationship, she wanted trust and love to be the strongest reason for them to stay together.

Not that she is now willing but she wanted to make it last, not last for only months because of being in a relationship with a person she barely knew. They’re no longer kids and they needed to know being in a serious relationship. She quickly fixes her things and wanted to take a long bath to clear her mind, since it’s already night time and she would be sleeping right after her shower.

Thinking about it, she was even too excited about the relationship that she is to have with Georges, believing it to be the relationship that any woman would want. She had always envied Nanaba and Mike, how they look cute together and how they had been too serious on one another. Times crossed her mind if there is still a chance of her having and experiencing the same thing that her two comrades have. Now this seems to be the chance, she finally grabbed it and do whatever it takes to prove herself being worthy of being loved.

The cold water pouring down her face was reminding her of what she had gone into. Before Georges, everything seemed to be alright. She was her normal cheery self that everybody wanted to spank due to her unconditional love for science and then at most nights, would be embraced and be surrounded by the warmth of Levi. He may be _stony_ (even down below his stomach that Hanji swears was even harder than any part of his body and never failed to make her feel like on top of a titan’s head, forgetting everything and every problem that she has on her mind) but he is also oddly cuddly and cute, and very romantic like most men does.

She hugged herself under the cold shower, missing the embraces that she and Levi had shared. She won’t deny that she misses his light kisses, the feeling of his tongue on her body, tingling and electrifying her with his fingertips, pushing deeper inside of her, making her feel and remember that she is a woman with needs after all, just like him. She could still clearly remember how he would kiss her without breaking the stare that they are sharing and how she would smile warmly at him. She misses the feel of his head nestled on her chest as she endlessly play with his hair. Somehow, he had also made her feel like a very important person in his life, a trusted comrade and an important friend to confide in with his feelings, and she was happy being that person to his life.

And then she remembered the last words he tells her after telling him that she is tired of being a toy to him.

 

**-x-**

 

Several days continued to pass by after that scene with Georges and Hanji sworn to observe him even carefully this time, to see if he is worthy of being called a _boyfriend_ or ‘her man’ to her. None of them had mentioned of what had happened but she sure can feel that he will bring that up again to remind her of her time limit.

She decided to let it go for a while. Georges has been too demanding of her time alone with him, the reason why she needed to cut some time with her other priorities and had further no control of time when she was with Georges. She admits that she always laugh and has a good time with Georges, even bring her to the local theater plays where he hugged her while they watched, laughing and then treating her with some dinner or lunch when in the streets of the village. He even brought her good clothes, helping her shop and not even getting mad if she takes time. Oddly, he was even more eager in shopping for womanly goods for her, even a few stuffs that is being add to make her look beautiful and stunning. She finds it hard to say no to him during shopping outside since he gets mad easily then will mumble things that will only want her to be deaf instead. She never liked being treated as a princess and would always be treated with things but Georges will tell her that it is wrong to say no to him when he is giving something to her and she should know how to accept things form him freely without any questions raised, and that it was an annoying habit of hers, to always say no to him. For her part, she just didn’t liked being spoiled too much, she’s not really much that kind or type.

She did even wondered if he is being allowed by Mike to go out most of the time with her but when she sneakily talked to Mike and found out that Georges has been too abusive of that fact that the woman who fancies him back is the reason of why he goes out and missing for almost the entire day. So one fine busy day, where everyone is busy preparing themselves for another mission outside the walls, Hanji took the opportunity to talk to Mike while their squads were busy doing drills and all other important matters.

“You know Hanji, Georges has not only been gone missing during the entire morning or in the afternoon, my squad had just told me that he has been sneaking out during nights.” Hanji was taken aback of what he has said and wondered if she was the reason of him being out at very late nights.

Mike pats her in her shoulder and she felt relaxed a bit. He returned the uneasy smiled that she just flashed a few seconds ago. “Look, I know you are not the reason behind his sneaky nights. We had been suspicious the very moment that I have been informed of this behaviour of his and I told Gelgar and Henning to go follow him one night and we found out that he has been into brothels and bars, drinking like there’s no tomorrow.”

Hanji bit her lip and tried to blink back tears, wishing that she is hearing the wrong things from Mike’s mouth. But how could she? Mike never, ever told a lie to her and has no intentions of hurting her. Mike felt the sudden sadness that crawled onto Hanji’s face and had nothing better to do but to hug her lightly and pats her back gently as he could. They stayed like until she felt a bit better.

“I know what you are feeling right now” he sighed as he comforts her, not used seeing her too broken over something that is not even related to titans or science or books. “We just didn’t want to tell you because we don’t want to hurt you or disappoint you.”

After breaking apart and thanking Mike, she promised him that she is alright and that

She had been more confused right after that, of what Mike had told her. She can’t believe it, never did she. She left Mike with uncoordinated footsteps, heading back to her own squad, slightly looking at Georges with his squad.

 

 

**-x-**

Three days after what Mike had told her and she had been more suspicious of Georges, wondering if he still sees other woman at night outside the HQ or as to why he is sneaking in such a very late night. She knows that she hasn’t officially accepted his offer to be his woman but if he is interested to her, she believes that she has the right to know about his interest every night.

Acting like usual in their breakfast together, he doesn’t smelled anything like beer or alcohol he does looked like tired, like the past days, as though he lacked sleep. Those black circular bags under his eyes were even smudged over by some kind of powder or something else, as though it is being hidden.

“You seemed like you need more sleep, Georges” she said and smiled warmly at him.

He smiled back and gently caressed her hand, making her feel uneasy seeing how he oddly looked like. “Of course, I can’t stop thinking about you and if we would finally be together, my love” He yawned and took a few bread inside his mouth. “I really wanted you for eternity.”

Hanji snorted in disgust in the inside, she fears that if he sees her acting disgusted over him, he would nag about her and how woman are irritating naggers. But deep inside, she knew why, why he had been continuously yawning everyday, acting as though he lacks of sleep. She remembered Mike even mentioning how he refused to do laundry together with them, most probably he is hiding something that shouldn’t be found out, and she knows perfectly what it was.

The following day, he took her again outside towards the village, leaving her papers for their final meeting before their mission undone. She can’t choose good proper shoes this time, halfhearted about what’s going on, bothered by her unfinished business.

“Choose, you know I wanted you to look beautiful” Georges murmurs to her ears.

She looked up into his face with hazy eyes, halting her movements in choosing and trying out shoes. “I... I thought you said I _am_ beautiful Georges”

He laughed maniacally and grabbed her hair and inched her face towards to his. “You are my love, but I want you to become more beautiful if you are to become my woman.”

She looked away and returned to look down to the shoes that she is trying like. It was silly looking, its colors hideous and not pleasing for her but Georges insisted for her to try it, so she did. “Oh and yeah” he yelled out for her as he took out another box of shoes for her to try on. “I want everyone who knows me to instantly recognize you as a woman with grace and finesse, not a woman who looks like a mad scientist.” His eyes were mocking her, feeling as though he is insulting her for who she is and she gripped the chair under her, from where she is sitting for control.

“But I am a mad scientist” she tells him back and he only glared at her hard.

 

**-x-**

A few days before their departure for their mission, Hanji needs to prepare and finish a couple of things first and check whether her hypothesis and ideas are correct when Georges enters her lab, dismisses Moblit and helps her out. They were talking about science and advance technology, a reason why he fancied him because of his hidden desire to the same thing that she liked as well and talked about it freely like before.

But then, things changed so suddenly.

When Hanji explained her theory over the possibility of new inventions for humans to use and sources of energy where Georges didn’t seemed to agree, he shut his mouth for a while and did not moved a single muscle.

“What’s wrong Georges?” she asks him, placing her hand on his shoulder. When he realized that she touched his shoulder, he instantly shoved her hand away as though she is infected with some kind of horrible disease and stood up.

Hanji was surprised and gasped, looked at him with terror and disgrace in her eyes. What did she do wrong this time? She was perfectly sure and careful of what she was doing and of the every word she says, and now Georges is getting all angry at her again.

He didn’t said anything and went to move towards her laboratory door. “Look, I can’t seem to agree with your words over your hypothesis with the possible sources of energy for us to use, it was just plainly weird! From what was that, nucleus and protons? Suite yourself and believe your daydreams, I’m off to sleep.” He muttered and scratched the back of his head in disappointment.

Hanji watched him from his back as he retreats from her room. She asks herself, with just very little things to talk over, he has to react that way and raise his voice like she is some kind of crazy talking witch?

She looked up again to him when he suddenly shouted a few words for her on his exit. “Remember how lucky you are with me for understanding and keeping up with your shit full of fantasies and ideas, Zoe. I guarantee you that no other man can do this kind of thing, amount of threshold to endure for you and your fantasies.”

Her breathing suddenly changed, inhaling hard and exhaling deeply from her nose. His words were surely are painful for her to bear and to even listen to with, and she could fill her eyes slowly filling up with tears.

Georges left her alone on her lab and Hanji finds herself struggling desperately for something to hang on to, and tentatively it was her shirt that she is gripping quite hard, containing the disappointment that she kept on denying for the past days.

%MCEPASTEBIN%

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -x-
> 
> First,  
> I would like to emphasize the thought of Hanji creating energy from nucleus and protons, which we would eventually lead or the main source of nuclear energy.
> 
> Second,  
> This is surely a really memorable day for me so yeah, just wanted to share. A lot of unexpected things had happened. 
> 
> Third,   
> It’s our queen’s birthday today! Happy birthday to our great Hanji Zoe! Long live Hanji! 
> 
> Fourth,  
> I would like to apologize for my long and unexpected break. A lot of things had happened, exams then grades making but since everything seemed to slim down now, I finally found the time to upload this chapter!
> 
> Fifth,  
> I would like to thank everyone for all the support that you’re giving me despite my sudden break, it was really heartwarming, as well for the kind words and your patience for waiting for my new chapter to be uploaded. I hope to upload next week as well! :D 
> 
> See yah all in the next chapter! :D
> 
> Xoxo  
> Ladyinblack ^,^v


	15. But You Can't Stay Away From Me

**Chapter 15:**

**But You Can't Stay Away From Me**

It was in the middle of the day and Hanji finds herself in the middle of her room, blankly staring at her book, can't find the focus she needed to understand what she is reading. Her mind was all over Georges and how he acts so differently towards her the previous days. She sighed and closed her book, swung her body in the other side of the bed and looked up. She tried to recall how and when it all happen, how Georges suddenly, slowly changing into a deep asshole he is now but all she could recall was that he became like that when she stopped seeing Levi and agreed to have him court her.

Thinking about it, it seems like nothing seems to be wrong about that but she still can't understand why.

Then, an answered popped immediately in the middle of her brain, a realization, honestly.

She never did once made a mistake towards Georges nor failed to show him how happy and caring she was to him but maybe, just maybe, he became a sadistic cold controlling man when he realized that he is sure that he can have her anyway, like she is some kind of option to him. It was pretty hard for her to assume but as a scientist, it is part of her to assume when dealing with unanswered problems.

Like a gust of wind, she suddenly remembered Levi.

She suddenly remembered the day when they were in town since they didn't had anything to do and Hanji decided to do a quick shop and he strolled along for some things for her lab and researches. He didn't complain much and just followed her around, helping her carry her things without even being told so despite the blank face that he is wearing, she is sure that he is not complaining or irritated. He just took the bags and went to follow her, watching her with focused eyes.

It made her lips curl up remembering how he looked silly as he tried his best to hide the irritation and not bother her in her shopping spree since she might even consume more time instead of doing it fast. At the end of the day, she treated him a hearty meal and he even earned a very strong kiss of desire when he entered her room, carrying her bags and returned her kiss with earnest.

As she turns her hair and absently look at the window of her room, another memory came crossing by, and it was during the mission that she accidentally hurts herself as well when she tried to save one of her squad member and was thrown by a titan on the ground, hitting something hard in the process and greatly injured her, scraping a huge a part of her right arm. She held on her arm tightly and screamed in pain. When she gazed on it, she presumed that it a tree branch most likely did the damage on her arm and scraped the skin horribly. She immediately took off her green cloak and had it covered on her arm, rolled it and tightly secured it.

When she managed to get back with the others, Moblit running towards her, assisted her as she in return, convinced him that she is fine and that there is nothing to worry about and succeeding in the process. Levi was just around the corner and dragged her towards an empty tent. Fortunately, no one was inside, perfect for their still kept hidden weird relationship.

"What the fuck happened to you, you idiot?" he asked, pushing her on a chair, landing harshly on her butt. She looked up to him and he seemed annoyed, eyes narrowed and focused on her.

"Nothing, really!" she pleaded but Levi grabbed her arm as she winced in pain and made her stand immediately. Levi glared back at her when he saw the bleeding of her arm. When he let go of her arm, he went out but it did not even took him three minutes to come back with medicines and bandages for her. He immediately cleaned her arm first with a wet towel, spread some medicinal solutions of her scraped skin then covered it with endless bandages, too thick for her taste.

When he was done, she gave him a thankful but sheepish smile. He did not smiled nor smirked, but he walked towards her, hand tugged on her ponytail and pulled her into a tight embrace. She was more than surprise of his sudden move and did not know of what to do.

"Le-l-levi?"

"You don't fucking get to do that again" he muttered, not even looking at her. Levi breathed heavily and pulled her tighter to his chest, eyes closed in contentment that she is alive and safe and whole, feeling her head pressed to him, proving that she is okay. It made him happy and wanted to hug her wholly, but he can't so he pulled away and looked at her in the eyes. "You hear me, Hanji? You don't fucking get to do again alright?" his tone, harsh and mighty.

Hanji's eyes were scared but soften when she realized why he is acting that way- that he is worried and scared. It was never her thing to assume of other's feelings towards her but the way she sees it, there would be no other reason as to why he is acting that way towards her.

She nodded and smiled, making Levi smirk at her. She scrubbed her cheek on his chest stomach and gave it a light kiss and thought of settling her head there but when she would, Levi gently raised her chin and searched at her face.

"We're not allowed to do this outside" he reminds her.

Her eyes immediately fell on the ground, lips curling downwards but a sudden fast smack on the lips made her awake of the moment. She watched him exited the tent, a small smile forming on her lips.

Going back to reality now that Levi could no longer do such things like that to her, she felt heart beating differently. It was painful for her chest to bear, as though it wanted to get out and it is making her breathe hard.

What's the deal with her heart now?

She closed her eyes and thought of Levi's quirky smile, the feel of his lips on her skin, and her body protectively embraced on his arms, protected and kept safe. Sadly, she can no longer feel that, for it was Georges she chose and expected that she will get the same feeling that she is getting from Levi.

She hugged herself, arms covering her body, her eyes feeling wet all of a sudden. She is not the type of person who gives up easily and if she wanted to be loved and she chose something she believed in with, she will fight for it. She have seen a lot of people experienced love, even envying Nanaba when she tells her how Mike charmingly pursued her and squealed in delight. She wondered how it feels like being loved and how to express and tell someone that she too can love just like any woman does. Love is a beautiful thing to experience and to explore and can't help but wonder of its possibilities and things that it could bring to her if ever she would be experiencing it as well.

The following day, she decided to have that same thing that she shares with Levi work out with Georges. She faced the day oddly alone, being told by Georges that he 'would be doing something in town today' and bends to give her cheek a kiss on the cheek. She didn't like the thought of it and shoved the negative possible ideas away and braved her day, even if she can't herself from wondering what his possible mission inside the town could be. Moblit was there to cheer her up and give her assistance when night came and Georges doesn't still seem to return.

She had finished her dinner already and made sure that she even finishes her work early as well, dismissing Moblit then went to look for Georges. She decided to wait inside her room but when the time strike an hour almost midnight, she thought that it is time to look for Georges and ask why he didn't even showed himself the entire afternoon. As she walked over the hallways of the now turning dark headquarters with a candle in her hand, she convinces herself that everything's going to be alright, that she will find Georges inside his room, waiting for her as well, and smiling back at her with wide open arms ready to be embraced.

She even crossed path with Levi along the corridors who seems to be roaming around, checking if the younger soldiers are already asleep or not. She felt the sudden familiar warm feeling came into her heart and felt giddy and excited all at the same time. She had never gotten the chance to talk to Levi for a long time and maybe tonight, he could help her cheer her up.

"Hey Levi!" she said, a voice a few octaves high. Levi was surprised to see her in such late at night and his glare turns into a softer stare. He was not able to say anything in return and gulped hard, as though he looked like he wanted to say something to her.

"What are you doing at this late at night, Shitty Glasses?" he asked, trying to maintain a strong voice. He seems to hold his candle stand a bit tighter than usual, Hanji noted.

"Well, I'm off to see Georges. I didn't saw him the rest of the day so I guess I better check him out" she explained with concern on her face.

Levi just blankly stared at her and nodded silently and went on his way, not even saying a word back to her.

When he turned around to go straight on his way, Hanji started to struggle, wanted to say something, anything so she could talk to him but she seemed late as Levi walked rather in a quite fast pace. She just couldn't understand him all of a sudden. All men now are starting to have issues, even Erwin practically having issues that when she felt like looking for some comfort conversation with her commander, he would always tell her that he feels like going to the bathroom and do shit. Men and their issues are really not logical at all, she tells herself.

She sighed and went to continue walking towards Georges' room, expecting him to be sleeping like some huge baby he was.

But it sure was really hard to expect.

Her other self was right, that she will just get disappointed. She even bothered knocking on the door but when no answer came, she burst inside smiling like a freak but her smile was wiped away when she saw Georges lying on top of his bed, uniform still on his body, hair disheveled, his left hand still holding a bottle of liquor and face flat on the bed.

"Georges" she whimpered, heart breaking painfully inside her chest. Mike did warn her so she shouldn't be feeling this pained looking at it, how can she actually love someone like this? What she didn't expect was this man sure has low liquor tolerance.

The man on top of the bed suddenly moved, groaning and scratched his eyes. He realized that Hanji was near by the door and staring at him, lips a bit parted, breathing heavily making her glasses moist.

"What are yah staring at, bitch?" Georges said in a wild tone, making Hanji stepped a few back. The last word pained her ears, even Levi never said that kind of word at her and here, even Georges seemed to mean what he said at her. She knows that she shouldn't be affected by that word but it got into her. Oddly, she did felt like a bitch, a huge one too. Like she was some darn horny dog chasing for Levi for some sex, like a true bitch, even if Levi didn't tell it to her face or herself to her own, this man right here sure is telling her she is a big one as well.

He stood up, looking dirty and smelled like a drunk beer pig coming right straight at her. She stared with fear and disappointment in her eyes, wondering if she indeed made the right decisions regarding this very man. "What are you doing here my bitch?" he said out loud and had her cornered, his tone the same like how he usually call her his lady.

Hanji can't stop the tears now forming in her eyes, she never expected that Georges could do something this shitty. She knew perfectly well that when a person is drunk, their inner self, inner hidden secrets are unknowingly being spoken by them, with no intentions of being revealed in the first place when they are very well awake.

"You sure do look a lot more beautiful and hot when I am this way, eh my bitch?" he smiles at her lustfully and looked at her with intense eyes. He licked his lips and eyed her body strangely. She may knew him but she didn't liked the way he is staring at her, most especially from where he is staring at her. She felt a sudden shiver run down her spine. He inched his face closer to her and she gradually inched it away right immediately, eyes blinking with unwanted disgust.

She's already starting to realize his intentions, which any man could possibly do when they are in the same state with Georges and are losing control of themselves. She only knew of Levi who has a great control when drinking liquor and never even shows any signs of being drunk but this man right here sure is starting to act like shit.

He chuckled at her sudden move and he grabbed on her pants and carried her as parts her legs, banging her on the door, placing her hips on top of his abdomen, making no rooms for her to struggle away. She was struggling inside, no matter what his intentions on her are and she didn't liked any bit of it. The feel of his warm hands that he slid inside of her shirt made her tears roll down her cheeks.

Ironically, she didn't liked it, she didn't like the feel of his hands along her skin. Hanji may know Georges and even liked him a lot but she knows to herself that she is still not yet ready to do it yet with Georges, no matter how much she likes Georges. She agreed to have Levi enter her all the time because she wanted to and most of all, because she trusts him the most. She had learned how to love Levi's strong, muscular body and what he loves to do when they are together on the same bed. Levi earned her trust through a very long, enough time, his nasty but concerned words and hands so strong but are very gentle on her. He gained her trust through the usual habits that the two of them share and things that the only two of them would understand.

She trusted Levi amongst any other man she knew.

And Georges is a different story.

She may adore him and find him incredibly a gentleman but he is not yet even in the half of trust that Levi had shared with Hanji. He was just starting to prove himself worthy and Hanji was just eagerly patient to see if he really is indeed worthy.

Just like Levi.

"What's the matter my bitch, why are you crying? I promise I'll go easy on you" he whispers on her ear and she knew that if they do it tonight, he won't be easy on her. He will just hurt her, that's for sure and won't even care if he tore her into to two.

He tried to kiss her and had his lips landed on her neck and chest instead. She jerks away, fear succumbing inside of her. If she does something, it's because she wants it but this is different. She thought that even she let Levi sex her up, it's because she trusted him more than anyone else. She had cared for him, knew him from inside and outside, bonded with him and had been with him for years, facing whatever the fuck life would want to throw to them.

And this man right here has not yet shared nor showed the same level of trust that Levi has given to her, nor journeyed their lives together like she did with Levi.

She shook her head many times, muttering 'no' all over and over and uncontrollably biting her lower lip. Georges is getting angry and she could feel his grip on her getting tighter and she didn't like it, she's getting hurt with his strong grip on her and feeling his tongue now starting to lick her on her neck.

"STOP IT!" she shouted and tried to push him away. Since he is way taller than her, she did managed to push him away, making her feet land on the same floor of the room but he still have her imprisoned between his arms, squashing her between the door and his body.

She had always vowed herself that if she is to let any man touch her, it is someone she completely trust and comfortable with, whether they are friends or lovers or whatever shit. Painfully, she realized that she _still_ doesn't trust this man, and did not even know that he could do something like this. What was worse was, maybe he has done the same towards other innocent girls or woman as well. She shrugged, she wouldn't even know.

She squeezed her eyes shut and felt the candle and its stand on her hand. Without thinking, she took it and hit it as hard as she can on Georges head and he hit his head on the drawer when he twirls and falls around like a foolish dog , slipped and slammed his face on the floor. Hanji looked at him if he is still alive and he did neither moved nor dared to stand but is indeed slept, drooling and snoring on the floor.

Hanji felt her chest calming down, drawing in deeper and longer breaths, staring at the fallen body of Georges. He looked ridiculously annoying. She wanted to laugh at it but only felt her tears rolling along her cheeks, her hands held her open mouth and darted outside the very room of Georges. Her feet moved, run as fast as it could, not knowing where to go. Then she passed by the part of the hallway where she saw Levi a few moments ago.

Levi.

She remembered his words when they last agreed of stopping what they share and have.

Her feet immediately dragged her towards his room and didn't even bothered knocking like always. Fortunately, it was open, most probably because he too just got inside his room so he didn't locked it yet, maybe just got finished checking if the younger soldiers are already asleep. When she opened the door to his room, he was removing his cravat and placing it on his bed stand table. His eyebrows did raised a little from its usual level when he saw her bursting from his door that late and was didn't expected to see her breathing hard with an unexplained look on her face.

And he was troubled.

He never saw Hanji in such state before and knew very well that she too is good in hiding emotions in so she won't bother anyone- just like he does. The only difference she is usually smiling compare to his straight dull look on his face.

He was halted from what he was doing and stared at her, waited for her to move and watch her of what her actions might be next.

"Hanji" he muttered, unable to control his self from asking. He was bothered by her stinging red eyes and shaky hands by the door. He knows he shouldn't but he can't help but worry about her, no matter how much he tried not to. "What the fuck had just happened?" his voice broke.

She exhaled deeply and shut the door behind her, not answering his question but didn't left her eyes staring deep at him. "Hanji" he called out again and all she did was just to close the distance between them.

She lowered her eyes onto him and without any warning, she embraced him. She embraced him so hard he thought she would be the very first human being to brake his bones. It was so unlike of her to embrace him in such way and he didn't know what to do.

He feels confused. He knows that they stopped any form of action that could lead into something that the two of them both agreed to stopped doing. Levi didn't want to stop feeling every inch of her but he knew nothing but to agree to whichever she would be happy with and despite his efforts to disagree with what she wanted, he still agreed.

For her.

For her happiness.

So what in the world is she doing with him right now?

"I thought you said we should not do things like this, Hanji" he murmurs on her ear. Despite stopping himself of doing any further things to her, he can't help but rub his cheek slowly and lightly as he can on her hair. It was the only action that he managed to do since his body suddenly tensed under her torturing embrace that he didn't reflected the same action towards her, even if he is tempted enough.

He missed her, a lot. There's no way he is going to deny that.

True, he does sees her a lot but getting this close with like this? Hell this was heaven.

He was surprised by her appearance at this hour but his heart did stopped beating at that instant that she appeared on his very door. Somehow, he knew that something is wrong from the way her eyes reddened.

Someone's going to be strangled and be tortured to death tomorrow morning, he vows.

Only a sob was able to escape her thin shivering lips and a trembling body pressed on his own were the only things that she managed to unwillingly expressed. This made him worry and even he knew that it was against with their agreement, he wrapped his arms protectively around her. He felt that she was scared, broken even and he felt the urge and need to protect her over something he does not know exactly.

He wanted to ask her what had happened but he figured that it would be better if he shouldn't because sooner or later, she will explain to him, like she always does.

There was a sniff and a cough and he rubbed his hand along her back to stop her from such a depressing state. He has never been too fond of seeing her being in such state like this, and it made him feel like he wanted to crush the bones of whoever made her feel this way. If someone like him had been so closed with her and knew her from inside and outside had never had the guts to do something shitty like this, then most especially them. They never have the right to hurt her like this and make her feel this way.

When the sobbing and shaking lessen, she lightly brushed the tip of her nose on the curve of his ear, making him keep a moan to his self.

"You promised that you're going to be there for me Levi, you promised me that" she tells him straight and not even pulling away to look at him.

He tugged his hand on her hair lightly as the other continued to rub her back. He nodded lightly, remembering that awful, unforgiving night that they last shared together. "I did" he slowly whimpered and Hanji earnestly, immediately crushed her lips onto him, making him moan unexpectedly. It was hard not to, after months of not tasting her sweet torturing mouth that do him endless wonders.

He was surprised as well but he didn't stop, he actually liked it that much. He groaned when she pulled away leaned her forehead against his. He watched her with careful eyes, questioning, wondering of what is going on. He was afraid to ask out suddenly, afraid to hurt her and even make her even sadder.

Her fingers curled tightly along his shirt and on his hair and he wanted to pull her down the bed and wake up with her imprisoned on his strong arms.

"Hey" he says and lightly scrubbed his nose on her cheek.

She pulled away lightly from him, rubbed her eyes and smiled at him the best she can.

"I know you're confused right now Levi and I am sorry, I'm being shitty again" she says and let out a small sad laugh.

Even if she smiled or laughed, it was not enough to stop him from worrying inside. She's definitely not being herself, and he didn't like how she is acting at the very moment.

"I just... wanted you. I need you." Hanji bravely muttered against his lips and she closes her eyes and captured his lips again. He too shuts his eyes and deepened the kiss. Those words... it pushed him to kiss her that way. He did his best to gently kiss her but she was a bit rough and he returned the same amount of roughness to her. He no longer cared if that fucking asshole finds out that he is kissing her, he could just immediately kick his ass off to sleep.

When they pulled away from each other to gather some air, Levi searched her face. He was expecting that she would be happy or glad but despite the grin that she flashes, he knows that she is still sad over something and he desperately need and wanted to know.

He scrubbed the back of her hand along his cheek, the tremble never leaving her trail. "I want you inside me tonight" she bravely whispered and shuts her eyes, placing her cheek across the top of his head. As always, she needed to do this to prove herself something that she is still a bit doubtful with yet and she believes that this the way, the only way perhaps.

Levi's eyes grew a bit and lips parted of the sudden words that escaped her lips. Their eyes met and she knew that he is searching her face, searching for an answer behind those words of hers, a slight confusion that she saw flashing on his stare.

She didn't wait for any answer from him or any kind of reaction and leaned in closer, kisses his hair, the side of his head, above his ears, his forehead and her hands crawled behind his neck, embracing him, pulling him to her. She stopped by his ear and felt her breath tickled along the top of his ear, making him feel uncomfortably queasy in the inside. He wanted too as well, he can never say no to her but he is worried about her. He never looked for intimate times with Hanji if one of them is in a state of confusion or horrible mood; even she herself knew that about them.

She didn't stop torturing him with kisses and her hands travelled along the vast of his chest, removing his shirt in a second then it was entirely bare. He was hesitating, he can't move under her sweet and moist kisses, hands too warm to handle, desperately urging him to move.

He shuddered and whimpered her name over and over again then she halted, slowly raising her head to meet his gaze, settling his hands firmly on her shoulders so he could search her face better and make her stop for a while.

Levi saw how Hanji's eyes reddened with unshed tears and he could swear that there would still be a few more to come, and it pinched his heart. He sighed and closed his eyes, wondering what made him love her like this.

Slowly, he started opening her shirt and she laughed, giving him a quick peck on the lips, encouraging him to get her naked as she carefully bit his shoulder. He managed a smirk and loosen his tensed body when he heard her low laugh echoing along his ears, feeling that he should keep that laugh being heard throughout the night.

Within minutes, they were wholly naked and Levi joyfully embraces Hanji warmly, feeling the heat of her bare skin to his, sitting on top of his legs as he supports her and won't lose her balance and fall down. She was like a hungry animal, kissing him wildly. Tongue to tongue, teeth biting his neck, his shoulder, - everywhere, she was unstoppable and furiously leaving marks everywhere. He gently removed her hair tie and let her hair fall down her shoulders and he continued to welcome her biting along his body and he only cradled her, embrace her and nuzzle his nose to her cheeks, giving it a kiss from time to time.

It was enough to let her know that he misses her a lot.

Hanji gradually missed every inch of Levi and she can't help herself from kissing him, every part of him. He had always taste so delicious, making her lick his skin and bite him as she earned a groan under his throat. Her fingers travelled along his spine, and it didn't failed to make him shiver with delight.

She was aware that he was only consolidating her for her needs tonight, but he is participating too well, and it's affecting her conscience. It's like she's toying Levi around this time, and it's not nice. They have been the closest allies at work and best of friends at the same time and they have been opened with each other ever since, knowing the smallest and biggest details that there is with one another.

Besides, he had used her for his needs anyway which is not different from what she is seeking tonight from him. Just having a fair play that is, she thought, convincing herself.

Somehow, she doesn't still feel so alright about it, hoping that they could just do this freely and securely, with no troubles and just them having fun.

Only them, just like before.

She kissed him passionately and pushed him down the bed, hands never leaving her waist as hers played on his hair and traced his face. She looked at him and his eyes were closed, enveloping her with his arms. While nibbling on his lower lip, she took the liberty to stroke his length and ride it feverishly. She flinches at first, unable to keep a tear from her eyes rolling due to a bit sharp of pain that she felt when he enter her walls. Levi saw her tear rolling down her cheek immediately and he instantly stood up, carefully handling her properly on top of him.

She let out a sob and he hushed her quietly and his tenderness made her even cry harder. "What's wrong? Does it hurt that bad? Do you want me to stop and pull out?" Hanji realized that Levi is still unaware of the emotional pain that had brought her in his arms tonight, and that made her smile a bit and wipe away the tears. She stopped when Levi angles his face to look at her carefully and uses his thumb to help her wipe away the fat droplets of tears on her face.

She flashes him a smile and kisses his nose. "No, I want you to drill me up tonight Levi"

He stopped moving his thumb on her cheek. "But you're fucking crying, you're hurt an-"

He was silenced by her deep kiss and her tongue flared inside his mouth, shutting him up. Once her head had made contact with his pillows, she pulled away and looked gently into his eyes, begging.

"Please" she muttered and Levi just stared at her. "You know how big yours is that it is just painful in the beginning, right?" she smiled forcefully, hoping it was enough to persuade him.

Levi then nodded and kissed her forehead and leaned in closer to her ear. How can he even say no to him? "Just tell me if you can't handle it anymore" he whispers and kisses her cheek. Hanji nodded with a relieved expression and started placing her arms around Levi's nape. He pushed inside of her gently as he could and nuzzle his nose on the side of her face, scrubbing his cheeks into it as well. She was still the same tight and sweet Hanji, and he couldn't ask for more, feeling his temperature rising.

Levi observed first if Hanji's alright with how he is doing his thrusts inside of her and when she calmed down with even breathings, her legs draping over his hips, which is the cue that he should go faster and deeper.

He penetrated inside of her as she had begged him to do and Levi was pleased to see that his efforts were reaching in again her standards and that her pleadings were actually being answered as she had requested. Hanji closes her eyes, moans loudly, saying his name over and over again, fingers playing on his hair, grabbing and pulling it and kissing him on his lips every minute as he nuzzles his nose on her every in his every thrusts.

Hanji held tightly on the soft sheets of Levi's bed, loving the comfort that it gives her as the man on top of her, face sticking by the side of her face, is doing his best to grant her plea. She inhaled his ever soap-like-perfume smell, Levi's very own scent, and gave him one last deep open mouth kiss and reached her limit. By the time she exploded, yelling his name in one loud voice, he caught her. His arm snaked below her arched back and kisses her open lips as he finishes his few more thrusts inside of her and releasing right on time when he pulled his length out and spread it by her thigh, such very close call. She had mentioned to him about unwanted pregnancies and that if she's going to get pregnant, that is when she is wholly ready.

He had always listened to her and abide by her, anything that will make her happy and contented. He never wanted to disappoint her, though sometimes it can't be helped, but as long as it is reasonable.

He collapsed by her side, arm snaking out from her back and travels along her neck, draping as her arm was pinned between Levi's chest and the bed. Their cheeks were flushed and were glued side by side, making it easy for Hanji to reward Levi a light and slow kiss on his cheek.

When she kissed him, his face slowly moved and faces her. She smiles back at him and kisses his nose when all he can do was just to crawl down and place his head by the crook of her chin, and by her neck. Hanji cradled his head and gave it kisses every minute, adoring his soft raven hair.

Levi is just so soothing and calming around her arms. Cradling him is definitely an answer to her worries.

They stayed like that for what a couple of minutes without saying anything to each other, just feeling each other's presence. Afterwards, Hanji felt like doing something that she had not yet done for Levi. She smiled lustfully and pulled Levi's head enough to meet her eyes. She could see that he was tired and worn out, his sweat still dripping even if they had already calmed the hell down.

"I want to try something Levi" she whispers and licked her lips. Levi's narrow eyes grew a bit excitedly when she did that, most especially when she said that with tone too persuading enough for him to follow.

"What is it?" he mumbles. Hanji giggled pushed his head towards her, capturing his lips, pushed and pulling his tongue, making him yearn for another round. When they pulled away from each other, Levi places his forehead to hers, not breaking the stare.

"I want you to stay still just like, on your hands and on your knees" his brow went up questioningly and her eyes sparked with delight.

"Oh yeah?"

Hanji giggles and kisses his nose lightly. "Yes, Captain" she said and started making her way down, still facing his body. The space that he had made for her was enough, and her face reached his length.

"I look like some damn dog" he mumbles as Hanji smiled devilishly on his length and he waits impatiently.

"More like some white pig for me" she yelled up.

"What the hell did you jus-" he was caught off guard when Hanji's hands stroked him again and places light kisses around its shaft, then its entire mass of now getting hard full of flesh. She licked and kissed his length, thankful that despite his height, it was still long and just huge, no wonder it had always succeeded in pushing her to the edge.

Then she swallows him whole.

Levi moaned and started producing sweat on his forehead and body again, his arms and knees getting numb and is starting to wobble.

This is bad, he might deep throat her all of a sudden and he had never tried that to her, and she might hate it and go out of the room.

He didn't want that to happen.

Hanji held tightly on his hips, her left hand grips the left cheek of Levi's ass. She smiled in the middle of her sucking him dry, too soft and smooth and sweaty, just plainly sexy and it definitely turns her on. She went us deeply as she can whole Levi was breathing unevenly on top of her.

His jaw tightened while his teeth gritted, wanting to bite his tongue due to the ecstatic pleasure that Hanji is giving him. She's going around his shaft and then his entire length, her tongue being such an explorer with no ending of energy, even her lips who is unendingly pecks him every minute.

"Haaa… Haaaanjjiiii" he moans, receiving no support to stop his knees from wobbling. He closes his eyes and focus to the lurking, punishing tongue of Hanji, focusing on the deep swallowing that she is doing to him.

He cursed, what did he even do to deserve such pleasure as punishment from her?

No matter, he is not regretting it, he is being thankful for it actually.

He tried to move inside of her mouth slowly at first, and she doesn't seemed to mind. Then, her sweet hands caressed her balls, pinching his scrotum and his eyes twitch with dynamic feeling. She caressed it on her hand, while the other still clutched on his ass. He closed his eyes, he's almost there, he's going to cum in three and half second, his going to fill her entire mouth of his steaming hot milky seeds-

-then she stopped and pulled away.

His eyes popped instantly with annoyance and looked at her below him.

"What the hell was that for!?" he said in annoyance and slapped his face on his sheets. Hanji only laughed gleefully and looked back at him as well.

"So you like that Levi?" she said and teasingly kissed his shaft. He groaned and nodded on his arm.

"I see, I'll finish what I've started _if_ you only cooperated with me." Hanji said teasingly, not even stopping her hand from caressing his length and his balls.

"What the fuck!? I am coordinating with you! You shitty blind woman!" Levi angrily replies, though he hoped he didn't angered her or something else that will make her go out of the room.

"I want you to move inside of my mouth as well" replying to his angry words and did not broke the stare at him. Hanji even licked and kissed his length and he groaned, making her smile teasingly at him.

She started plunging on him again but this time, he too moved inside her mouth. In circular motions, a bit lightly shallow making his hard rock penis slam on her lips, making her laugh then deep throated her before he spills everything inside her throat. He liked it, a lot; most especially when she didn't pulled away and even made urging moans and sounds underneath him. With last three thrusts, he was empty. She milked him dry and hard.

He collapses entirely on the bed, can no longer feeling his body or anything and just felt so damn tired and worn out. Hanji crawled out underneath him and went to his side, smiling, laughing, giggling straight into his face. Damn, this woman still has the energy after that!, he thought.

"Looks like you're a weakling tonight Levi. Now hail to your queen for I am the winner and stronger than you now" she says mockingly and he smirked between his uneven breathing. She too was breathing hard and uneven but not that worst compare to his, her hair everywhere which he thought he missed seeing a lot.

"Oh yeah? Queen my ass" Levi retorted back and imprisoned her tightly on his arms, laughing tiredly as well. She tried to run away but he's still quick, her assumptions wrong about him, while proving her assumption correct: that Levi can produce enough energy to use if he wants to and wouldn't just rest even if he's really tired.

She giggled and he didn't let go of her, forcing her face to inch closer to his. When she calms down, she nuzzled her nose on his, eyes shut in contentment. His hands held her face tightly, scared of losing her after such great pleasure that she gave him. "Who told that I easily give up like that and with no revenge? Definitely not me!"

Hanji eagerly smiled when she saw Levi making his way on top of her, kissing her lovingly on the mouth as her hands enveloped him towards her, making him regain his energy and get back onto her. She moaned on their lip locking kiss and eyed him gleefully.

Without a clue for Levi, Hanji pulls him and then pushed him as much as she can, back flat on the bed and capturing his lips for another deep hard kiss again. His hands travelled along her nose, eyes and hair and places kisses on her cheek when they pulled away from one another.

"I guess we will have to see if you can still manage to handle me if I ride you hard this time, Levi."

"I was supposed to rock you hard, remember what you told me?" he asks, smirking devilishly at her.

"Yeah but you didn't let me go through being on top of you a while ago, so I'll do it in this very moment." Hanji was excited and gave him one last sweet kiss on the cheek before her hands strokes his length again, slowly and carefully, the way that will surely harden it, and carefully slid it inside of her.

Her cave welcomed him in as she shuts her eyes, fingers scraping hard on his hard chest, moaning in ecstasy like a she-wolf. Before she started to move, she made tiny circular movements first, scrubbing herself to his hardened one.

"Ah, Levi you never failed to make me feel so… ahhh, full!" she exclaimed, moaning as she places his long hard length inside of her and started building the right pace of speed to ride his strong hard length. He smirked wickedly at her and enjoyed seeing her breast juggles as her left hand went to hold her hair and the other to her teeth, biting it hard. Her view was so hot and intoxicating that he can't help building his fury in a fast pace, feeling that he will explode again in such early and fast moment.

He watched with whole heart as Hanji enjoys herself riding his cock in and out of her, doing circular motions, feeling him in every single walls of hers, feeling even fuller than before. It was driving her incredibly insane and can't help but make moans and let out Levi's name numerous times.

Levi was too was already losing it but he needs to please her while she rocked him hard as well. His hands travel along her clit and rubbed it, forming circles with and she rocked him faster than before. The way she looked so hot biting her now free lips, her hand travelling on to her breast instead after leaving her lips made him unexpectedly inside of her- and she felt it.

He can't believe that he came first before her, the fucker he was.

Levi arched his back screaming Hanji's name, holding her tight on her hips then she too followed, gaspingly yelling his name with all her glory, eyes shut with might. He didn't want to end yet so when he saw that Hanji has not yet collapsed on top of him and was only left sitting on top of him, his cock still inside of her, eyes still wide shut, he pulled himself towards her and started grinding his hips onto her again, hands travelling across her lean smooth back, securing her balance.

Hanji opened her eyes, a bit dizzy of having too much already but didn't stop Levi of his thrusting again on her. Instead, she kissed his cheek and nuzzles her nose on his, not asking him to stop. When they once again reached their climax, they hugged each other tightly as though they are clinging for their dearest lives.

Hanji gasped for air and laughed a bit, alternatingly kissing Levi in his cheek and by his hair, smoothening it then hands going back to his back, rubbing it lightly. Levi in return only clung to her, fingers gripping on her small waist and admiring its curve. Before placing her lay down on his bed, he gave her a long soundful kiss on the mouth then started biting her chest, shoulders and breasts.

He angled himself on top of her while Hanji in return calmed herself down on his bed, massaging his head, playing on his hair while he suck and place kisses on her breasts. Levi would tend to look at her every after minute and give her lips a quick, appreciative peck then resumes his pleasurable time on her breast.

"Levi you're so great" Hanji babbles, caressing his hair. She feels safe for the very first time, and she is sure that she _is_ safe under the protective and….

… back to her old, usual self.

She deepened Levi's head on her breast and felt that incredible feeling building up again as he do his job on her. His fingers even made its way towards her core, making her moan his name unexpectedly. When she was too wet, he stopped his fingers inside of her and sucking her breasts and kissing her chest. He was supposed to tease her just like she did moments ago but his teasing didn't seemed to take effect, she just shut her eyes and embraces his head along her chest.

He sighed and just rested there on top of her.

Hanji missed Levi being on top of her, like a doll that she could hug and is too comforting. She rubs his head multiple times then places a light kiss on top of his head. "I miss you Levi" she mutters and those words that escaped her mouth made him look at her eyes in surprise.

He wanted to ask about Georges and why she is here right now in his room, making love with him like how they do it before but something about that thought seems and feels wrong.

He decided to have her speak first before he even asks. Besides, knowing her for over six years maybe, she will eventually say it out loud to him.

So, he crawled and angled himself on top of her carefully, his face the same level as hers and kissed her passionately, so gentle as he can that he places his strength on the sheet that he is gripping.

 _"I miss you too, you shit head"_ he wanted to tell her back but he can't, so he just do this to her, hoping she would understand what it meant to him.

Hanji responded back with same amount of eagerness slid her tongue inside of his mouth, pushing his tongue away and not letting him have a chance of going inside her as well. He wanted to give the amount of lust and passion that she is giving out tonight so instead of pushing his tongue inside of her, he gradually sucked her tongue, making her yelped all of a sudden but did not stopped kissing him.

He really is some kind of animal, she thought, and she really liked it.

When Hanji can no longer feel her lips on her mouth, too numb all thanks to Levi's vengeful kissing lips and that her tongue has been sucked dry, she gently pulls away from Levi and stared at him, searching his face. She looked at his narrow, grey storm eyes, his cutely pointed nose, thin lips, white pearl skin- he is still that beautiful creature that she had known to adore. She smiled and kisses his nose, can't help but appreciate him entirely.

Levi returned the same amount of appreciation towards her and kisses her lovingly on her cheek, so light that she wanted to ask why since when did he even became so light towards her.

"Hey" he muttered, tense and worry all over his voice. "Are you-"

"Hm?" she asked and tucked her head on top of her hand.

"I came inside of you a while ago, I'm sorry." He told her as his wobbling hand came to caress her abdomen. His touch made her wobble all suddenly as well.

Hanji brought both of her hands and cupped his face in between. As she stared into those deep stormy eyes of his, she saw worry and she can't help but feel like she is melting.

"Don't worry, I'm not fertile today." She giggled and gave his jaw a kiss. "It's okay, I'm okay."

Levi returned the deep stare towards her. "You sure?" He knew that she is always certain of things, even if sometimes she is the type of person who doesn't seemed to know what is happening to her.

"Yeah, you know me. I really need to do that right? To be careful so I need to be extra watchful of my body, even if I don't seemed to be the kind of person." She assures him and he smiled warily to her. It had always crossed his mind to have her pregnant and have her carry his child because he knows that she is the only woman who is the perfect candidate to carry his children. Aside from that, he knows that the mixture of their blood will give out an exceptional and perfect child to the world.

A perfect new hope for the world like they do.

But that dream is now in shattered pieces.

"Hey, you okay?" she asked and scrubbed her thumb into his cheek.

He smirked at her and kissed her palm and didn't let go of it. "yeah" tells her.

She giggled and it made him smirk at her, letting her embrace him and settle his head on her chest, both drifting off into a deep slumber.

**-x-**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's notes:
> 
> Hi!
> 
> I'm sorry for not updating for a while, I was too busy with work and focused on my board exam so yeah. urgh.
> 
> I just had another insane and chaotic or rather disastrous day at work but still managed to somehow pull it through with my man. But I still feel a bit bothered though, so I'll be absent tomorrow for the first at work, to think I never really liked being absent. I'm just really losing my motivation to work and persevere hard.
> 
> I am truly missing my real life.
> 
> Anyway, this chapter was not thoroughly edited but I hope it is fine.
> 
> I'm really hoping I could get to finish this soon and start with my other LeviHan fic.
> 
> This chapter is for you guys,
> 
> 97
> 
> .336
> 
> Really hoping I could upload again soon!
> 
> I can't thank you much for your support!
> 
> much love,
> 
> LadyinBlack


	16. Cause I've Never Been So High

**Chapter 16:**

**Cause I've Never Been So High**  
  


**-x-**

 

Levi was the first one to wake up, having Hanji gripping on his left arm, head on his shoulder, nose nuzzling along his neck and he can’t stop kissing her head, her nose and her lips as she sleep. He brought her closer to him, imprisoning her along his strong yield arms and cradling her like some baby she was. Her warmth along his skin was intoxicating, he missed her body along his, the softness, tenderness--- he missed every inch, every part of her. The strong built of her body and the unfolding beauty of her physique had greatly haunted him and he is not letting go in an instant this time.

Then so, taking more minutes of cradling her in his arms, caressing her hair and her head with his fingertips, carefully tracing her cheeks, he places kisses lightly on her hair, thanking for such pleasurable and wonderful time that they had for the night and hoped that it won’t end nor that they could do it again---

\---that no one will be a barrier in their relationship, their bond or their friendship or whatever it is that it is most appropriate to label their relationship. Despite the fact that he had already admitted his feelings for her, she doesn’t seem to even mind it and his efforts as well. No matter, as long as he has her in his arms right now, he can’t be even more grateful. Besides, he is not in favor of forcing her into something she is not fond of.

He swayed his head, he shouldn’t be feeling this way, he shouldn’t be telling himself that she loves him back, who would even love a dirty old rat who has no investment and not even educated with no known family or relatives? Definitely not her, he had always known that they are a complete opposite in a lot of things, even the most important things.

Once the sun’s ray had reached and warmth the face of Levi, he slowly placed Hanji down on the pillows and sheets of his bed and gave her one final kiss on the cheek before going to the bathroom and take some bath. When he rose on his feet, cold on the floor, he looked back at the woman sleeping like a rock on his bed.

He managed a smirk.

Hanji really slept like the dead, he really worked her hard, but it was his duty to please her, make her smile, make her laugh--- then the smiles that she flashed last night and the giggles and laughs that she let out throughout the night will eventually haunt him so badly, most especially if she had made their time last night as their _final_ act of---- bond, or whatever shit it is to describe their quality time with each other. She looked so angelic and peaceful, someone who doesn’t seemed to have the capability of going mad over titans and science.

Staring at her made a part of him regret in agony, wishing that somehow, he could own her heart and so they could worry nothing but the very partners for each other for until the end of time.

He shrugged at the thought, he was too late for her and he could be just nothing but an ally, a friend for her part.

He let the cold water run through his body and he cleaned his body, though he didn’t wanted to since that would mean he would wash away all the spit and smell of Hanji that she had left along his skin--- only if he could ask her to place it there again along his body.

He had allowed himself to get clean under that cool water, calming his body and freeing his mind off from any negative thoughts and think again of the great time he had with the woman sleeping on top of his bed.

 

**-x-**

Hanji on the other hand was wide awake and pretended to sleep along Levi’s cradling madness, which breaks her heart since he was too sweet and gentle. She did not know that Levi could still act so sweet after ending things with him.

Once Levi had stepped inside the bathroom, she took that as a cue to get herself dressed and fixed herself as fast as she can and leave him, she can’t bare handling any questions that he might wanted to ask of her. She managed to swoop back her boots on her feet, her hair still hanging lose on her shoulder, signs that she just was just newly awaken still lingers along her face when Levi burst out of the door, still half naked with only a towel on his hips covering him.

Fuck, she thought.

Even if he loves being cleaned and getting himself clean, he sure is fast in making himself clean.

He seemed surprised of seeing her ready to go in an instant and gulped hard. “Hanji” his voice croaked, eyes softened when he muttered her name. Hanji felt a sudden sharp of pain slash through her heart, being keenly aware that she is already hurting him again. Staring at him made her want to consume that sweet lips of him, looking so adorable with only a towel hanging loosely on his hips, sexy and handsome as ever. Her eyes even traced his well-toned abs, going down to that very sinful zone and that even if it is covered behind the towel, she could completely remember what it looks like, and definitely, _what it taste and feel like._

She can’t believe that that incredible well-built man has been consuming her body, as well as her heart.

Somehow, she wanted to deny to herself that she was the reason why Levi is acting so strange, distant and hurt whenever he is around her but maybe she just can’t afford to accept such thought, that someone as strong as him could get her because of her doing.

Also, she never wanted to hurt him. He was the bestest person and comrade for her in all possible time, and she was very grateful of that. The moment that he had admitted to her how he really feels about her, it greatly broke her heart as well.

If only she hadn’t been so stupid.

She didn’t want to believe that very intelligent people like her are way too stupid when it comes to love, and now maybe their theory is right after all, that intelligent people like her are foolish and stupid when it comes to love. She even thought that her brain can still give her correct assumptions over things like love as well, she had never knew that love really is complicated. But she has to, she has got to do it this time if she really wanted to be free from another burden, and she believed that she is choosing the right thing now, she is sure.

To think he had already poured his heart out to her.

This time, it is her turn.

His eyes softens even greater once he had approached her but moving forward made her stand up from her feet straight and stare at like her she was about to burst into tears. She was breathing hard and uneven, exhales deeper than usual.

“Levi” she whimpered his name in pain.

“Wha-what’s wrong?” he moved a few steps closer but she only responded by stepping back further away from him.

“No Levi,” she started, moving her head from side to side, can’t afford to even meet his eyes. “I’m the one who is _wrong._ ” Levi can’t seem to understand what she was saying and waited patiently for her finish.

“I have finally understand it, I can’t even believe that I am so stupid.” She started and even let out a sarcastic chuckle.

She flinches, eyes starting to have the courage to look at him straight in his grey stormy eyes, her brown eyes starting to tear up but despite that, she wiped it away and smiled as hard as she can. “I am very, very thankful of you Levi, really. You had always been there for me, from the most shitty time and to my most desperate times and you never judged me.” Levi’s mouth parted, wanted to say something but held it and decided to listen to her pleas first.

“Through my shouts of despair to my moans of desire and pleasure, you had stood by me and never even doubted me even to my assumptions to my study of science or my titan researchers or inventions. I—I ,I I know that I had agreed to be your--- tool, a material, or a toy even a doll or someone to be used for your urges,” she said which was hard, even to think of a proper term to describe herself for him and he started to move towards her, his head moving in disagreement of her words.

“No Levi I do not blame you because I do agreed too because I,” she covered her mouth and sobbed, a tear rolling down her left cheek. She had never wanted to be too emotional most especially if he is the reason why.

Gathering all the strength that she could find along her body, she flashed him a smile and he did not know what to feel about that. He never liked seeing her in pain and he would even gladly kill anyone who would yield such pain to her. As for her part, this is definitely the hardest shit ever to say, even harder than proving math in use for her researches.

“I love you Levi” she whispers with a huge exhale and it was the worst whisper that Levi heard. How can she love him? Someone like him never deserved to be loved, most especially by an educated, caring and strong woman like her. Those three words followed by his name that came out of her mouth was surely tormenting him, making his heart pinch in pain and worry.

How could she have been so stupid? Why to him? Levi can’t stop thinking. He won’t deny it, he really liked what she said but he prefers to see her happy and not choosing the same mistake that other people had chosen.

That loving him is the very cause of their death.

His mother, Isabel, Farlan, soldiers who had admired him and joined the Corps because of him, and the list goes on. He can’t bare to see her go as well because of him. He wouldn’t know what to do without her.

“I love you Levi” she whispers again, nodding her head as she closes her eyes for quick second, as though finally agreeing something to herself, making things clear as the man cannot do anything but had his hand twitch.

“I thought Georges was the man who could give it me, who could make me feel the love, the care and respect that I yearn for but I realized that I was wrong. He never made me feel safe nor happy, excited maybe but the way he even touch me did not even brought me comfort. He was just a big, fat, gloomy bastard shit that pretends to be a gentleman Levi.” More tears escape her eyes, and the way she speaks was too real to be even doubted. It was real from the way she had described him and the way he had made her feel was so her in her usual delivery but the latter part of her words were troubling him, he just wanted to make her stop and kiss her and make her laugh. But how could he if all she does was to step back everytime he will step forward towards her?

More tears spilled this time and she shut her mouth so tight, her heart not the only thing that is breaking but as well as Levi’s. He wanted to reach out to her, to comfort her that and tell her that he understands and that he loves her a lot too, more than she loves him and before she even realizes it herself. But then he can’t as she always tries to back away as though he is some kind of titan this time and she would run any second if makes another move.

When she finally removed her hands from her mouth, she smiled admits the tears rolling down her cheeks. “And I am sorry for that Levi. I really didn’t intend to love you, I swear. I know I broke our agreement but I can’t help myself, I just can’t. Knowing everything about you, being so close to you and experiencing such great desire and pleasure from you, how can I not fall in love? Everyone can fall in love to that. But this time, I know what I feel for you is not a mistake. Every ounce of love that I feel for you is not a mistake and I am more than proud and happy to tell the entire world that I have fallen in love with you Levi.”

Levi was astounded with what he is hearing and didn’t see this part between them coming. He can’t think of any words to describe of what he is feeling at the very moment, but he swears that he wants to shut her up with his deep sweet kiss. He wanted to tell her that he loves her too but she can’t seem to stop talking herself out.

“Hanji” he murmurs while her eyes softens and Levi was in the verge of hitting himself with his own 3DMG for not doing or even saying in return. “You don---“

“Don’t worry Levi, you don’t need to love me back. You don’t need to console me anymore or even comfort or force yourself to listen to my researches or studies or anything that fancy, you had enough of me already Levi and I know that. All I want now is to see you breathing, see you alive and fighting for mankind’s sake as I do my role for mankind as well. We both have our roles and duties to focus with and that would be enough to lure our minds and thoughts away from each other.” She continues, not even letting him butt in, even if she knows that he might be able to have tell her of how he really feels about her but for now, she is not even certain if he still loves her like what he had said before.

“I’ll be okay, I’m just happy that I was able to let you know of what my heart really feels and no, I am not hallucinating or doing shit or whatever it is that you are thinking about of what I am saying to you right now. I know from the very bottom of my heart that I love you Levi and I realized that nothing and no one can ever replace you” Hanji explains and then she continues. “Even your warmth on my body or your kisses can never ever be replaced by anyone, and I have proven that to myself.”

She blinks her eyes, once, then twice then smiled genuinely like she always does. Levi was quiet, hoping that she would still say more. He won’t deny that what she had confessed and melted his heart and had his mind into total blankness but he doesn’t have any idea what to tell her.

“You don’t need to be worried Levi,” she assures him, trying desperately to sound honest and persuading. “It was really nice to be fucked by someone who they really love, most especially by the world’s strongest yourself. And I wanted to say thank you for letting me prove to myself that I am too, capable of loving someone as dear as you Levi.” She smiles and picked her glasses from the bedside table of Levi, his eyes following her every move.

“But at this very moment, I don’t want you to speak of anything that has something to do about _us_ or how or what I feel about you because I’ll never forget that and I don’t need to be reminded. I feel so stupid as fuck when I told myself that I actually love Georges where in fact, he is nothing compared to you, he is just a total shit compared to what you make me feel.” She stated and laughed a bit, even if it was a bit tensed, it calmed her down a bit. She started to walk over Levi’s door and had it open, knowing that he can’t follow her looking like that with only having a towel on his hips.

Before heading outside, she took one last look at the man behind her and smiled.

“Please be always safe. I never knew that you had stolen my heart but now, I gladly give my heart to you Levi, and I just want to see you safe, that’s all I’m asking.” Her words were hardly thought but rather came out from her heart and not her excessive working brain like how she usually speaks.

Hanji flashes one last warming smile to Levi that he swears that will haunt him for the rest of his life if ever he doesn’t make a move to have her for his own. With that, she quickened her feet’s pace and passed through the door, leaving a dumbfounded Levi inside of his room.

As Hanji went out of Levi’s room, she convinces herself that he still doesn’t love her, despite the fact that he was even the first one who confessed to her about his true feelings.

 

 

**-x-**

 

Hanji was almost limping coming out from Levi’s room to hers, which really annoyed her. True that they had some glorious sexy moments months before but she guesses that it was not enough that unable to entertain him inside of her. With Levi being the World’s Strongest and Shit, it is likely for her to receive very few little bruises from him or get a bit of that feeling of inching pain whenever he enters fully at her but this time is like a whole total reboot for her, and having four rounds with him, she guesses, he totally had gave her total soreness overload. She managed to walk but if she makes a wrong unexpected step, she’ll automatically twitch in sudden unexpected pain.

She shrugged. Levi sure can pull a lot of weird things to happen to her in all aspect.

Breathing in the morning air and feeling the sun’s warmth seems to brighten her mind and caused her to smile as though she hadn’t cried like a whiny baby a few moments ago but managed to pull it through. She did not expect to see Levi react that way, even looking broken and confused which is so unlike of him. The thought of him looking like that because of her was also inappropriate; Levi would never, ever do such foolish thing like being affected of her emotional words.

It was so unlike him, and would never be him.

Shower was the first thing that she had done when she step foot inside her room and washed every detail that Levi left on her body. She was successful when she realized that those red markings that he had sucked out of her were fifteen in total, she oddly counted and it spread across her body. No matter how much she scrubs them, even how foolish she was to believe that she could get them all out of her body through scrubbing made her even more stupid. The evidences that he left on her body that cannot be removed was too overwhelming, and she’s scared of taking more showers or even changing her clothes more often from this point, afraid to see them and be reminded of the man she loves.

She shrugged and finished her shower a bit faster so she won’t think of anything serious while washing herself down.

Once she got a new set of uniform worn on her body, she sighed before heading out of the HQ and have breakfast somewhere else or do something she needed to finish before heading on their mission tomorrow. Anything, just do anything that will keep her mind out of Levi and his lustful but tender acts on her last night or his gentle lips on hers, skin too warm for her to bare.

She groaned in disgust as she made her way out of the HQ doors and go somewhere within the village and liberate herself from the thoughts of Levi but as the events of last night comes flashing into her mind, she can’t help blaming herself for coordinating so well with him on bed, and that she did had some fun too.

She too was quite angry about herself letting Levi messed her mind like this bad in all aspects of hers and let him haunt him this bad, feeling him in every beat of her heart, feeling his warmth in with what he had left in her entire body.

Hanji figures that Levi had such an amazing talent of tormenting her in all possible ways, and that she just allowed him to.

 

 

**-x-**

 

 

After Hanji left Levi in his room feeling like some horrible huge titan shit, he immediately worn his uniform and thought of running after her. But as he wore his cravat, the final piece of clothing that he wears, he recalled how she cried in front of him and how she reacted with his every advancing steps so he figures that it would be pointless running after her. With a huge amount of confusion on his head, he lay on his still messy bed, the very bed they had enjoyed to disarrange last night and his heart sunk as his body sunk on his mattress, not knowing on what to do.

He loves her, he is certain of that and even before he gets to admit it to her, she goes having incredible time with him on bed then telling him that she wants it quits and then after a couple of months, she suddenly reappeared in the middle of the night, crying (which is so unlike of her), had incredible sex with him again and then tells him that she actually loves him before running for her life.

Why the fuck does she need to do that?

She doesn’t have any idea how much her words had placed a burden on his heart.

Levi’s hand travelled along the pillows of his bed and grabbed it, hugged it so tightly that the pillow would be thankful it does not have any bones to brake. It still smelled like her, and he hugged it tighter.

He misses her again.

He wanted to hug her, take care of her, protect her and beat any asshole into a pulp who will make her cry just like last night, and most of all, love her at all cost. He doesn’t really know the meaning of that L-fucking-word, which ironically starts the same as of his first name, and yet he does not have any idea of what is its true nature really means.

He stood up from his elbows, not letting go of the pillow. If he ever wanted feel so safe and at home, be loved, wanted and taken care of which only Hanji could make him feel, he better finds a way of finally having her for himself. If last time he was late, this time he won’t be.

With a growing evil smile on his face, Levi vowed that he will be as smart as her this time and won’t fail this time around.

 

**-x-**

 

%MCEPASTEBIN%

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!
> 
> Well, more or less five more chapters to go and this fic is done! :D damn. 
> 
> Anyway, I really had thoughts of weather to update now or not but seeing the number of feedbacks and all, I can't help myself but to update.
> 
> Thank you so much for all of your supports! :D
> 
> And I hope I am not failing you as well! :)
> 
> xoxo
> 
> LadyinBlack


	17. What Are You Waiting For?

**-x-**

 

Hanji busied herself for tomorrow’s mission and she felt happier for not even seeing Georges the entire day, but did heard Moblit mentioning to her that Georges has been down on his room for all morning until the afternoon.

“Squad leader Mike said that Georges was missing the entire morning and missed drills of their squad. They asked me to ask you but you were gone out in the village and I said I don’t know anything else” he nervously tells her. “So they decided to look for him in his room and saw him there, face flat on his floor.”

Hanji didn’t looked at Moblit as he explains but smiled as she reads Erwin’s letter of approval of her continuation of her research outside the walls, not just focusing with titans but with the mystery behind the environment and ecosystem that is present there and she has huge interest with. Before, Georges seems to be the only one who shares the same interest with her about those kinds of things but thinking about it now, she sure will have a better look and research about them having no one but herself around to study them, most especially not even an imposter who will give her no help at all.

Moblit was surprised to see how Hanji does not react and seemed not to be even bothered by what he is saying where she should be anyway.

“Squad leader...” he stretched out his hand when Hanji turned to look at him.

“I am kinda guilty of what had happened with that guy” she says with a smile, surprising Moblit even more.

“Well, he deserves it.” she finished then returned to read Erwin’s letter of approval. Moblit was shocked indeed but a comforting smile came rushing into his face. If there would be anybody else who would know of Hanji of her nature, it would be him, aside from the senior officers of the Recon Corps.

He slowly places his outstretched hand over Hanji’s shoulder and gently rub it. Hanji looks up to him and smiled as he smiled back, knowing and trusting her with her decisions and of where she is most happy with. He did not even dared asking her of what had happened, of what made her do that to Georges but he sure does know that he does deserve it.

As always, Moblit trusts his Squad Leader the most.

 

**-x-**

 

Levi had heard of all the ruckus that had happened about Georges coming from his squad and of Mike and did not even asked of what could have happened to make the guy suffer such thing and be discovered that way in an early morning. Mike too seems to have a hunch and did not even asks Levi of his perspective regarding Georges.

“I still have to suspend him due to his actions and won’t allow him tomorrow in our mission, even if he is needed.” He tells him as they walk side by side towards Erwin’s office for their last briefing for their mission on the following day. “I don’t even think he is in the right state of mind or even physically. He did not even appeared in any of our drills for the week. Always missing and found drinking. Maybe last night he got what he deserves.”

Levi only smirked with Mike’s words, can’t help to agree with him, even if they don’t know the real reason behind that. They saw Hanji about to knock on Erwin’s office when she suddenly halted and grinned at the two man.

“Hey Hanji” Mike greets her.

“Hi Mike! Nice seeing you!” she greeted warmly then her eyes goes to Levi. Suddenly, she felt like her knees were throbbing and her pores starting to produce sticky and cold sweats, and it’s not cool for Levi to see, most especially Mike.

Levi in the other hand just only nodded at her, acknowledging her presence though he is way beyond tempted to just grab her hand, pull her into a dark room and talk, confront her of questions in his mind but right now, he needs to hide all emotions that could crawl into his face and by far, he is doing it right.

“Levi” Hanji muttered back and giving him the same nod of acknowledgement.

Hanji returned her gaze towards Mike and opened the door, where only Erwin was already inside waiting for them to enter. The three took their usual seats, Hanji and Levi on the right side of the table where Mike usually seats on the left side with Nanaba.

Nanaba came late after five minutes while Hanji nervously gritted her teeth, scrub her palms and focused on what she needs to deliver for Erwin and her other co-officers. She shouldn’t be feeling nervous or shit like this but with Levi right beside her just, _fuck._

She just told him that she didn’t want to see him ever again and now she is seating beside the very person who she just sworn not to see.

But what was she thinking?

There’s no way that she possible cannot see Levi for forever since they are living on the same place, training together, dealing with all kind of shit together, and seeing the same people every single day, how can she afford to run away from him? She’s just being a big scardy cat, is she?

“Hanji are you alright?” Erwin’s voice suddenly halted her from being too submerged on her thoughts and focusing on everyone on the table, staring at her. Seeing all eyes were on her made her suddenly feel like a nervous wreck and she let out her usual nervous laugh as she scratches her hair.

“Haha! I’m sorry Erwin, I didn’t had a full amount of sleep, sorry I bothered you. Please continue on what you were saying.” She says to them and focused her gaze on Erwin, ignoring the presence of Levi on her left. Somehow, she still can’t remove the awkwardness that she is feeling but decided to ignore it as well.

Apparently, Erwin reminded the four of them about their plan of reaching a new destination and having it successfully be an extension of their commanding base every mission of theirs and fill it with supplies needed necessary for surviving and some flares, just in case anyone of them and their soldiers gets left behind or something else. Erwin was very high in spirits about it since last time, they were able to conquer a small village composed of not more than fifteen houses and was able to drag all the titans away with very none of their men dying in that quest. If they were able to do it last time, how could they fail this time?

“And I assume that you already know what to do being given the liberty to resume your research on the environment outside the walls right, Hanji?” Erwin asked.

Hanji’s eyes suddenly grew a bit but managed to flash a smile, satisfied of her efforts showing that she is not affected by Levi’s presence near her-----not.

“Ah, yeah, yeah I do. Thanks a lot too, Erwin” Erwin smiles back at her and nodded.

“I would be expecting full reports on that Hanji”

“Of course! Just allow me to let them study first and you know, hav---“

“Yes of course, after all that” Erwin agrees without asking any questions, swaying his hands in the air freely. Hanji just smiled softer and vowed to give Erwin the report right after. She felt really excited and giddy that she wanted to start right away.

“I heard all about that member of yours named Georges, Mike. How was he doing?” Erwin asked worriedly, suddenly feeling the room eerily quiet and cold. The only thing warm was Hanji’s cheeks that are burning pink.

Mike eyes her even before he answers Erwin. “He is to be suspended. His actions were already reported but time it was too much so I am to discipline him since he is my soldier.”

Erwin turned to look at Hanji, brow rising at her questioningly. “Do you know any of this, Hanji?”

Hanji stared at him softly, the curl on her lips never fading away, head turning back and forth. “Not really, why should I, Danchou?” Her tone was teasing and pronounced the last word a bit harder than usual. “I am aware that I should not care about him, right?”

Erwin’s both brows now raised in surprise, hands clasping together, placing it below his chin. “I just thought tha----“

“Nope, that was done. Whatever you guys know about us is over. End of story.” Hanji looked happy like her usual expression with a goofy smile on her lips but the way she had said those words made things final and clear, her hand even swaying to halt them from further questions. No matter how curious they are for what had happened between her and her rumored prince, they didn’t asked it right there, even if they are way closer to one another when outside their professional rooms.

“I see.” Erwin muttered. Hanji’s eyes softened and nodded at him slowly as he adjourns their meeting.

Hanji exits the room calmly and headed straight to her room to get some sleep immediately so she could focus on her work tomorrow in their mission.

She bets it’ll be one amazing day tomorrow as well.

As for the ones she had left, Erwin eyed Mike immediately and he just swayed his head in return, telling him that he too does not know of anything between Hanji and Georges. For what Erwin has been aware of is that they were officially dating already but what the hell did just happened? Nanaba shrugged her shoulder and Levi just flashed them a blank stare.

“Don’t even think I know shit.” He tells them and walks away.

 

**-x-**

 

Levi did not lie at Erwin since he really does not know anything that had happened between Hanji and Georges but _did_ knew that she came to realize that she loves him, and not that fucked up bastard. He should be happy and victorious but what is victory if you don’t get the reward after your hard work?

Moments earlier, he did noticed how Hanji moved and acted very strangely and odd beside him, can’t help but wonder if he is her problem again, if he is making her uncomfortable or shitty because he is more than willing to even volunteer and go outside, if that was the only way that she would relax. She didn’t even eyed him when he speaks nor look at him if she explains in front of them. It was so unlike of her and he didn’t even liked it.

He still can’t help himself from asking her why. It’s like he just wanted to embrace her and brake her bones and ask her what her problem was.

Damn, that was too romantic, he guesses.

When he finished checking on the sleeping brats and passed by Hanji’s room, it was already dark, assumed that she must have already asleep for whatever reason. Instead of forcing her to have some conversation, he decided to calmly touch her door and silently wished her goodnight.

Moblit was on the way on his room when Levi was about to go to his. Like a sharp lightning suddenly coming out of nowhere he suddenly grabbed Moblit in the arm and pushed him inside his room. He was shaking when he was pushed to sit down on Levi’s bed and is almost in tears.

“Stop crying like some shitty kid. I need you to do something.” Moblit even looked scared even more and was about to faint.

“I am not going to do something anything foolish with you Moblit. I just need a little favor with your dearest squad leader.” Levi says as his arms folded and calmed the hell down. “Don’t act like I am interested in you Moblit” he said with distaste.

“Then what is it that you want with Bontaichou?” Moblit choked. When he heard that Levi was interested and wanted to ask him a favor that has something to do with his dear squad leader, Moblit felt a bit panicky in the inside. He had always looked after her and can’t help but feel concerned, even if it’s Levi all along.

“I am aware that you would be giving her assistance tomorrow whenever she started working on her observations or fucking experiments right?” he asked, a bit anxious.

“Ahm, yes captain”

Levi smirked with all glory. “Good.”

 

**-x-**

%MCEPASTEBIN%

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Argh.
> 
> 4 days of no classes made me feel extra lazy for today -,-‘’ had to ask my students to just copy the damn notes, do some seatworks and had my lecture without any visuals to look at. Nice huh? But hey, I do promise to make it up to them tomorrow.
> 
> Anyway, I would like to say thank you for the favorite and follow of these amazing people:
> 
> Artemis – Hime  
> CaitlynKnotek101  
> CommanderCats  
> d.dragosh97  
> Darkmoonlightt  
> Knightmaremage  
> Belg1996  
> Raihime27
> 
> Look, I am sorry if this chapter is short but this one should really turn out this way and I can’t do anything more about it.
> 
> See you in the next chapter though.
> 
> xoxo
> 
> ladyinblack


	18. You're Like A Drug That's Killing Me

**Chapter 18:**

**You're Like A Drug That's Killing Me**  
  


 

**-x-**

 

The Recon Corps had their usual morning parade along the townspeople whenever they are to have a mission outside the walls, hearing how supportive they are, wishing the soldiers a great journey (to death or just outside the walls, Levi was not sure) until they reached the western gate. Like their usual, they braved their path towards their new mission, disregarding the words that they hear from their townspeople, unsure if it’s enough to strengthen them as they face their probable death.

Levi was focused and is determined to go outside and was longing for this mission since last night for a different reason, not even feeling any sort nervousness of some sort in his chest. His eyes were focused on Hanji who was smiling, holding tightly on her horse, listening to the words of her fellow men like she always does. She was at Erwin’s left side, having Mike on the right side with their respective squads.

Levi kept his eyes glued on her but still attentive of his role into the Corps and to his squad, giving orders and watching everyone not just his squad. Once they have reached their first meeting based, everyone did their usual ceremonies, setting up tents, rest, check and count off, eat a little and do whatever shit that they needed to do while the commander plans for the next move that they are going to have.

Reaching the destination had took them an hour and a half, taking time getting past a few taller titans that they thought of facing and needing to take a detour instead. Unfortunately, a few lives were taken with the process. Fortunately, it was only four and more importantly, it was Hanji, much to Levi’s relieve.

Levi came inside of Erwin’s tent who was surrounded with seven soldiers, asking for directions, next thing to do and loads of shit that Levi didn’t seemed to recognize in anyway, knowing that it’s their job and he should not do anything about their concerns towards Erwin.

He marched in the middle, all eyes falling into his small stature, including Erwin.

“Levi” Erwin muttered, “what is it?”

“How many hours are we going to stay here old man?” he demands, eyes turned surprised of the way he had spoken towards Erwin though most the soldiers ignored that, knowing how he could easily kill them in an instant and how long he was serving Erwin for years. Maybe he has a right after all.

Erwin can’t help but contain the laugh inside of him, seeing how Levi behave like this early in the morning. He sounded serious even if he doesn’t know why he is asking anyway.

“More or less an hour.” Erwin replied. Levi scruffed, nodded despite of it and left. Before turning his back and going out of Erwin’s tent, he did muttered ‘thanks’ without explaining why.

Erwin figures he doesn’t need to know.

Maybe he will just wanted to have some long sipping of tea or some nice shit.

Levi made his way towards where supposed to be at but he got irritated when he didn’t see them there. Where the fuck could they possibly be?

Levi roamed around their area and were unable to see even Nifa’s tiny structure or Moblit’s huge forehead.

“Heichou!” It was Aurou’s yell, and why the hell was he yelling for him? Levi approached him and saw the rest of squad with Aurou who were busy refilling their gasses.

“Heichou, we have refilled yours as well” Aurou happily announced and handed him his gas and another extra one. Aurou kept his aura smooth and approached Levi coolly as possibly, mimicking how he see Levi as a cool example.

Levi only held the gas tightly on his hand and stared at it wordlessly while his squad stared at him rather worriedly.

“Is there something wrong Heichou?” asked Petra, standing up from her feet. That brought Levi back into reality and stared at the ginger head girl. Levi moved awkwardly and handed the newly refilled gasses to Aurou’s hands, Aurou’s eyes widened.

“Take it and have it attached on my horse with my other things. I’ll go grab it later once I get back. I need to speak with Hanji and her squad, have you seen anyone of them?” he asked, hiding the tension from his voice.

Aurou looked at his other squad members and all of them didn’t said a thing, only stared at them. Aurou shrugged his shoulders and turned his head side to side. “We haven’t seen any of them Heichou” he sadly said.

Levi suddenly felt a hard tug on his chest. He wanted this day to be such an achieved one and didn’t want to even fucked up. He gritted his teeth wildly in the inside, thinking where her squad could have been. He had talked to Moblit about this and he better not screw up or else.

“I saw them earlier near those trees Heichou” Petra gladly said and pointed near by the right side of their camp not much full of trees. Levi smirked at her answer and she blushed like some little girl having crushes on her teacher.

“Thanks Petra. I sure do hope that they are there” he says before he exits. “I’ll be seeing you guys later” he calmly adds.

As to why he was looking for the other squad, they do not know and they never wanted to intervene to whatever his thoughts were because if he wanted to tell it to them, he will but this time, they decided to let it go.

No matter what his business was with them, it was none of their business.

 

 

**-x-**

Petra was right pointing at their direction, a bit farther than what he had anticipated though. He even ended up walking for twenty minutes just to reach where they were, even thinking that he was going to get lost due to the trees that he had passed by.

Seriously, they managed to get this far from camp?

Erwin just allowed that?

When Levi saw Nifa chatting with Keiji, his chest suddenly lightened with their presence. He looked around to look for Moblit was still nowhere to be seen and he didn’t liked it.

“Where the hell is Moblit?” He had no choice but to approach Nifa and ask. “I need to talk to him.” He said firmly while the other squad members only looked at him with disbelief. It was unusual of them to see Levi looking tensed and anxious.

“Ahm, over there. Just go further inside those trees and you’ll be able to see him.” Nifa pointed by left side of the forest and Levi nodded, taking no additional time to spare. Nifa and the others followed Levi’s trail towards the inner part of the forest, confused and very much surprised of his interest in looking for Moblit.

Levi saw Moblit’s shiny blonde hair and he didn’t let a second passed by and immediately attacked him from behind, pulling him down through his arm and pressing his hand hard on his mouth while the other held tightly on his left arm, forbidding it to move and do other escaping methods.

“You almost got me down, Moblit. I thought we had a deal last night you motherfucker?” Levi whispered harshly on his ear.

Moblit only squirmed and made noises from Levi’s hold. “MMMmmmmm!”

“Are you still going to help me or not?”

“Mmmm!”

“Can’t here you, you motherfucker.”

Moblit now removed Levi’s left hand via his right and stared at him angrily. “Of course I will Captain! I am a man of my words!” he replied in a pit of rage but still in a contained whisper.

Levi chuckled and lets him go. Moblit rubbed his nape and stared at Levi.

“I bet you know what to do now, don’t you now Moblit?”

Moblit only nodded twice and cleared his throat.

“Squad Leader Hanji! We will only stay here for not even an hour as said by Erwin Danchou!” Moblit yelled out to Hanji who was busy lurking on the ground with a magnifying glass on one hand while her other hand was on the ground, supporting her in observing a various set of insects roaming around the grassland below her. She only let out a high volume of laugh over Moblit’s nth reminder at her and grinned like a fool looking at some weird looking species.

“Hey Moblit! You should see this little guy here! We never had this kind of caterpillar growing inside the walls! It looks marvelous!” She wanted to touch the squirming creature with her fingers but figured that it might have some defense system on and might do her harm, or less likely kill her which seems to be crazy in the first place. Instead, she took a twig nearby her and poked the caterpillar thrice.

Hanji’s ear’s flap with excitement when she heard of footsteps coming near her, thrilled that Moblit was now also eager to share her new specie to observe. She immediately stood up from her place and held the caterpillar hanging on the twig, not even caring to turn around.

“Hey Moblit! Check this one out! He looks really amazing and I am a hundred percent sure that we haven’t had his kind ever, inside the walls. The walls were too greedy of the possible knowledge and studies and amazing, profound discoveries that is a huge barrier in knowledge and new possibilities. Do you have a bag with you? Or a jar? We need him to be kept alive.” Hanji blabbers without even turning her back to even check who was around and continued to talk passionately on what she was saying. Oddly, no answer came to her and the ruffling sound of grass, leaves and twigs being stepped on suddenly stopped. She can’t help but to turn around and find out why Moblit is acting strange and not answering her question.

“Hey Moblit, I really need a jar---“

It was Levi.

His eyes were focused on her, her warm brown chocolate shining under the ray of the sun. She was really beautiful, he thought, her skin even glistering under the ray of the sun. It was warm like her eyes and he wanted to kiss her at the very moment. But like what she had always mentioned to him, communication is an important shit in everything, being her priority as well in studying the titans.

Hanji in turn stiffened, the twig she was holding right in front of her face fell on the ground together with the caterpillar, her eyes focused onto Levi’s grey ones. Her lips were partly opened since she was not able to finish what she was saying and was startled when she realized that it was not Moblit who was coming near her.

“What are you doing here?” she whispered, Levi even barely hearing what she had said, her eyes still dumbfounded of what she was seeing.

“You’re not supposed to be in here” she continued; head sideways in disagreement over something.

Levi tried his best not to get pissed but he never liked seeing Hanji so scared of him or not wanting to see him since she was the only person that he is sure of that was always too eager to see him and had been most comfortable with, so why was she acting this way towards him? What did he even do wrong to her? He didn’t even said anything that will offend her when she admitted her true feeling towards him so just what the fuck is she doing?

“Hanji” Levi muttered softly, desperately wanted to reach out to her but Hanji only stepped back further.

“Don’t you dare come near me” she tells him and he can’t help but frown at that.

“You had been with me from the very first moment in the Recon Corps, dealed the biggest and smallest bullshit that Erwin had told us to do, endured Mike’s nose and weird sniffing shit, watched each other’s ass and now you’re acting like I have some disease of some shit!” Levi’s gritted his teeth as his jaw thightned on every word, fist into a tight ball, containing his anger within him.

“You were sitting beside me yesterday, not even a fucking meter apart and to top it all of, we had loads of sex for how many times in what, more or less than a year, you sucked my dick as much as you like, swallowed my seeds, kissed me until you get tired, ride me with that very tight puss of yours and embraced me while we are both naked! We even took take baths together for fuck’s sake!” Levi was getting angry but there is no way he would stop talking. Hanji needs to know and there would be no way for him to keep his mouth shut.

Hanji gasped on his words, face turning into a complete utter surprised, feeling like a naive teenage girl. She really didn’t thought that Levi could actually say those words to her and that it means a lot to him. It may be a bit harsh if told to others but she finds it rather sweet.

“Look, if you planned on to doing that shit of just running away without even trying to even listen to what I thought of what you had told me or even how I feel, then you’re such a fucking greedy woman!” Levi was already a few octaves higher than his usual voice tone and he didn’t liked it, fearing he might be hurting her, her eyes even already glistering with tears.

“If you only planned all along to be with me, endure me, make me feel that I am cared and wanted by someone else for the very first time for real and have this fucking insane glorious memories together then you’re just going to suddenly shove me away as if you didn’t mean anything to me, then you’re load of bullshit Hanji! I even thought you were the smartest living human today but I don’t understand why you can’t even understand how I feel about you and what you really are to me!”

She flashed. She can’t even say anything back at him now, realizing that she had been such a fool not just to him but to herself as well.

But, is Levi saying the truth?

Or he was just saying that because he feels sorry for her?

Levi closed his mouth, narrowed his eyes and moved it again from side to side. “You shouldn’t have shared those kinds of things to me if you planned of stepping away from my life.”

A chord was struck within Hanji and she felt her heart beat in pain with those words of Levi. Not that they are nasty but they are so thoughtful that she wanted to cry. She even suddenly felt troubled seeing how Levi’s eyes soften and was that pain that she sees? She can’t actually believe what she is hearing in this very moment, she wanted to run across him and embrace him and tell him that she is sorry but she can’t, she’s scared of trusting again, even if this is Levi that she is talking about now.

Another part of her heart and mind won’t stop whispering to her that she _can_ trust Levi. And he is right about what he had said but she never knew that he sees her that way.

“Levi” she yelped his name when he was about to turn around and leave, feeling disappointed, thinking that he can’t force her into listening to him afterall. It was never his thing to force her into something that doesn’t want to and he didn’t want to intrude her anymore. At least now that he will give her up, he knew that he did what he can and fought and did not easily had her surrendered.

But when she whimpered his name, he saw a tiny ray of hope.

He stared at her, face blank, lips pursed tightly, keeping it shut after his long-all-of-a-sudden speech to her.

“What?” he said in full distaste and Hanji can’t help but to look frightened at him. She never intentionally wanted to angry him but he does seemed angry at her now.

Her eyes fell on the ground, thinking, looking for an answer.

She sighed instead and said “I’m sorry” with a long deep exhale of air, still looking at the ground, feeling deadened of what she had made Levi feel because of her pathetic thinking and uncontrolled emotions.

Levi slowly turns back to see her face and walks right immediately towards her. He hesitates at first, started moving in a much slower pace then rushed when he was just a meter away from her. When he was too close to her, he rubbed the back of his palm on her face, making her close her eyes and flinch with his touch. But the fear of being touched again by him was then changed by the familiar feeling of contentment and she slowly closes her eyes, feeling the warmth of his hand.

Suddenly, he judo throw her, her body falling on the soft grassy ground, eyes adjusting with the sudden shift of her body being thrown unaware on the ground. When she was about to stand up through her elbows but Levi’s weight suddenly pinned her down on the ground and no matter how much she tries to push him away from her, but his knees on each side of her and then his strong arms suddenly imposing her as well had unabled her to even escape underneath him. She guesses that she must have looked like shit as she struggles underneath him too.

Normally, she enjoys being under him since she always go crazy whenever he is on top but this time, she is still going crazy but wanted him to get off her this time.

“What the--- LEVI!” she screams, panting a bit harder.

“Moblit! Nifa!” she yelled desperately for her squad but not even a sould came to rescue her. She smelled something fishy against her squad, and she will find out after she deals everything from Levi after.

She moved desperately underneath Levi as the man on top of her only smirked at her as she struggles for her life.

“You tell me those words again Hanji so I can forgive you” he said, trying to hold his laughter.

“What!?”

“Those words Hanji, how you really feel about me” he says a bit teasingly to her and she continued to struggle even more.

“You know, I don’t really care if they leave us here.” Hanji’s eyes widened on what he had just said, and she kicked her legs even wilder and Levi didn’t seemed to care nor be affected the least.

“And I won’t get off you until you tell it to me” he mockingly whispers to her ear as he inches closer to her. Hanji’s face was badly turning pink, can’t believe that she is suffering such horrible moments in the middle of her research.

Levi in the other hand was having difficulty of exactly telling her what he wanted to hear, such word causing his ear drums to break. He can’t even say it but he wanted to hear it from her all over and over again. He wanted to hear it first thing in every morning, every afternoon whenever he is going to visit her in the middle of her work and the last thing to hear before he shuts his eyes before sleeping at night.

Maybe she was the one who is being greedy here in the first place, not her.

He nuzzled his nose against her lobe, making her twitch in hidden desire of ecstasy and a whimper escaping from her thin lips. There would be no way in hell that she would telling him that she loves him again because...

... because she feels too damn stupid that she needed to persuade herself that she adores Georges just so she can prove to herself that it was Levi who she really wants, and she even needed to hear such words that irritates her ears and had touched her ego, traumatizing her of her decided and agreed helping cause to Levi.

Such simple word reminds her of recent horrible memories, and she doesn’t like it.

But this man right on top of her is pleading her to tell it to him again.

“No” she muttered and eventually her struggles weakens and slows down, she’s feeling rather tired already. Levi always tires her at all cost it seems, most especially when he is on top of her.

A rumble of like shaking of the ground suddenly alerted the two of them but Levi didn’t seemed to be bothered at all. They both looked at the right direction, Hanji alarmed and Levi calm as ever. They knew what was coming but didn’t knew that they were three in number.

“Le-L-Levi!”

“What?”

“Titans” Hanji gasped.

“I don’t care”

“They’re going to eat you alive first”

“Let them then”

“You got to be shitting me Levi!” Hanji exclaims, worried that the titans might slaughter and eat him right before her very eyes, and it would be all of her fault.

“I will stay here, unless you do what I asked you to do” Levi gingerly tells her, smirking at her that she wanted to slap his face.

The three titans were already approaching, the first one seemed like a seven meter and the one following him is a nine meter and the one at the back an eleven meter.

They’re so fucked.

The first titan rushed towards them, Levi waiting eager for their hands to grab him and be eaten, not even a sign of fear can be seen on his face, not even a tremble can be felt. Hanji was getting nervous so badly that she looked back and forth from the titan and back to Levi. The titans closed their distance from them and grabbed Levi.

Hanji stared horribly at Levi as he was slowly being grabbed away by the titans away from her. She felt all panicky when she sees all three titans focusing on him, just him. She can’t believe that Levi was even willing to die just for some ridiculous thing that he wanted to hear from her again.

When the titans were about to tear him apart, Hanji screamed with all her might and stood right immediately, hands tight on her mouth.

“I LOVE YOU LEVI!”

Levi’s smirk in his face widened, and he gripped on his gear like how the titans gripped his ribcage.

“LEVI, I LOVE YOU!”

He flew like a phoenix wih his gear and instantly cutted the fingers of the preying titan holding him and managed to strike it on its name a second later.

“I REALLY DO LOVE YOU!”

Levi aimed for the second and third ones but was only able to strike through the nape of the second one deeply and was only able to cut the arm of the third one.

Hanji rose from her feet, her hands were still glued on her mouth and her eyes tight shut. She didn’t want to hear or to see of what has happened to Levi.

“I HAD ALWAYS LOVE YOU LEVI!”

She was forced to look at the ground from where she was standing as a hand and a head dropped before her, making her backward a bit from where she was standing.

Her mouth was opened in surprised when she removed her hand from her face and find a trace of Levi.

“Leviii-iiii” she quietly whispered and in that moment, that little man landed downright a centimeter in front of her. Tears suddenly bursted out beyond its hold and she instantly wrapped her arms around Levi, too tightly than she should.

She sobbed hysterically and hammer punched Levi on the chest, still taking no effect on him the least. Levi just tugged his hand on her head and playfully pulled her hair. He didn’t mean to make her cry but he can’t stop himself from laughing his ass off, his plan bloody succeeded.

Not entirely though, and he didn’t want Hanji to cry.

Hanji whispered his name over and over again along hist chest and even let out a few sobs, can’t believed that she almost lose Levi in that nano second right there.

“Hey Shitty Glasses, you okay?” Levi whispers along her ear and had both of his hand travel along her face and lift it quite with force so he could look at her and search her face. She did not answer but did only looked back at him, face pink with embarrassment, hands still on his chest, gripping on his shirt, sobbing and a few tears running down her cheek.

Levi brought his lips into her hair and kisses it before embracing her. “I’m sorry” he says gives her cheek a kiss.

“Sorry my ass!” Hanji suddenly replied and wiped the tears away from her worried and angered face. Levi only smirked and lightly combed her hair a bit with his fingers.

He always had a thing on her when she’s pissed.

“You harassed me in the middle of the forest, forced me to say how much I love you all over and over again, disturb me in the middle of my research an---“

Hanji stopped blabbering at the still smirking Levi when Moblit suddenly came into the scene, looking rather worried and panting.

“Captain, Squad Leader Hanji” he breathlessly tells them. “I run back to inform you that we are about to go. Erwin Danchou is telling everyone to wrap up already and everyone is starting to fix there things.”

Levi stared at Hanji first before returning his gaze over Moblit, who both looked worried. Without even letting a leaf fall from the trees above them, he pulled her by her arms, his left hand on the arch of her back while the other on the back of her head and passionately kissed her.

Hanji tensed and panicked, causing her to slap Levi on the shoulder and was deeply troubled that Moblit is in there, witnessing how Levi kisses her passionately in the middle of the forest. When she tried her best to look at Moblit’s reaction, he doesn’t seemed to be so surprised, making her sigh in the middle of Levi’s passionate kiss.

When she sighed, Levi’s tongue slicked out inside of her and squirmed endlessly inside of her wet mouth. Damn, he missed kissing her this way and he don’t care even if Moblit was there to witness how much he too, feel the same way towards Hanji.

Hanji closes her eyes, stopped tensing around and placed her hands on Levi’s shoulder, hanging for support and just recalling what it is like to surround her arms on his shoulders again. She was returning his kiss with eagerness and tilts her head for a better angle, making Levi moan and nibble on her lower lip.

Moblit cleared his throat enough for the two of them to hear.

“AHEM. We really need to go” Moblit says and rolled his eyes.

Hanji giggled and presses her forehead to his, scrubbing his face with her hand slowly as she could. Thinking about it, this man right was really, indeed the only man that she learned to love romantically.

The way she giggles made Levi soften his eyes and kissed her lovingly on the nose, pulling her again, pressing her body on him. She was kept imprisoned on his strong arms like a cocoon and she too embraced him back, capturing him in her own arms.

“I’ll be seeing you tonight before you sleep” he whispers in her ear and kisses her cheek.

When they pulled apart from each other, Moblit and Hanji allowed Levi to go ahead first before the two of them followed.

As Hanji walked beside Moblit, she can’t help but bite her lip from containing her laughter, holding the giddy feeling churning her insides. She can’t believe that she fell for Levi’s plans, and that includes Moblit for sure.

So Moblit is now his sidekick eh?

Hanji stole a look from Moblit, and he didn’t seemed to notice. He sure does play around so greatly she wanted to give him loads of works once they had gotten back after their mission.

Or perhaps not, since she did not know whether she should rather be thankful for him instead of burdening his life when he even helped Levi after all.

 

**-x-**

I can’t even remember when was the last time I edited my works, and this one is even barely double checked. Well at least, I’m back. X)

%MCEPASTEBIN%


	19. But I Get So High When I'm Inside You

**Chapter 19:**

**But I Get So High When I'm Inside You**

**-x-**

 

Levi was burning inside him with huge amount of happiness and pride when he finally able to get Hanji say those words again.

It was the bestest, selfless and surreal confession that he had ever heard in his life, even if it was the second time around that she admitted to him. The jolt of merriness and satisfaction immediately rushed throughout his entire body and he wanted to kill a hundred set of titans along their way with a new found energy.

Maybe this is what that _love_ could make someone feel. It’ll make you really energetic and high and can’t stop thinking of the root cause of this feeling that he has in his heart. His heart too was beating differently this time, it was fast and makes his body warm, it’s as though that he is more than confident about the fact that someone really cares about him that much and that he is accepted for what he is, not for what he can do.

As his horse run wildly along the formation, it was like he was running towards haven as they make a run towards their resting camp for the night. He feels tired but with the fire burning inside him, he still wanted to spend more time with his woman.

Yes, she is definitely _his_ now, and he has to make that clear to her tonight, she is far too blind to see and realize the truth. Those sweet smiles of hers and every cute tilt of her head, kiss, touch--- it was driving him mad and excited, it will only be his now and no one else’s.

He never knew that he would be able to own such priceless treasure in life.

The day seemed to be on his track as it seems since not only that his plans about Hanji succeeded, their mission seems to be running great as well. There were casualties but it was lesser this time, since Levi was all so high that he was able to keep a better eye with everyone with the help of his squad. They even managed to conquer the village that they have planned to make as another extension base for them and have it free from the titans. Erwin was able to carefully plan everything out and had Hanji help him execute it while Levi and Mike and Nanaba was able guide and help tremendously fight the titans with the other soldiers.

When the titans was executed around the area, Levi and his squad together with Mike’s, set up a perimeter while the other squads most especially Hanji’s, set and fix every new temporary offices and storage rooms below two houses with basements and have those houses fixed in a hurried time but is still identifiable that it is theirs.

Levi smiled to himself as he looked from above the roofs one time and saw how Hanji laughed while she carried boxes and discussed plans that had lead to their success. Seeing Mike and his squad help him and his squad to lead and fight the titans along the inner part of the village made him even better since that huge brown curly haired man named Georges is nowhere in sight. He knows that he already has Hanji’s heart for real but he still can’t manage to see that asshole anytime soon, he will snap his neck he swear.

Once that Erwin has announced to leave and to go back to their resting camp, which took a couple of hours before the night starts, Levi has been feeling anxious like hell. Now, they are on their way towards their final pace before they could creep out tomorrow at dawn going back inside the walls.

Just like everyone else, Levi was in a huge amount of anticipation.

But his is different than theirs.

He had already talked this over to Moblit sneakily while they were still cleaning and fixing the house during the afternoon, and he better not screw up or else he will surely feed him into the woods naked.

After leaving Hanji’s side earlier in the day, Levi finds himself drawn into grabbing her out of nowhere and take her into a more private place where he could have her on to his own. That thought made him stare at her the entire day, watched her as much as he can and felt his heart crumbling if she was nowhere in sight. He needs to have control and reminded himself but after someone that he really cared about and was very much dear into his heart had admitted that she really loves him, he can’t help but worry all the time and think about her every single minute, even if what he thinks that what he is doing was absurd.

Everyone had a light supper and grabbed their sleeping bags and turned off every candles on top of the crates inside the castle, having only the lights opened deep inside the castle. Erwin was busy doing double check up on the continues reports that his secretary officer has been recording throughout the day inside his office that was reserved for him inside the place, even Hanji has one of her own for they could work and keep records on with.

Levi made sure first that his squad was in deep slumber and the other younger soldiers and took note of who were those who are in charge of watch. He finally saw Moblit after an hour without seeing the guy and his woman all throughout supper. Moblit only gave him a slight nod and pointed with his chin over the southern part of the castle.

Levi smirked and passed by him, giving him a light tap on the shoulder for gratitude and acknowledging his work well done.

As he journeyed toward further towards the deeper part of the castle, his heart already jumping out of his chest, deafening his ears in every beat that it does, he finally saw the main reason why.

There she was, coming out of her office door that she too has just like Erwin. She had a slight smile on her face and was holding a set of papers on her one hand. He has a good ten meter distance away from her which was great because if he was closer, he must have pinned her against the wall.

 

 

**-x-**

 

Realizing that she was not the only one along corridor, her eyes went up to see Levi standing a bit farther from her. She didn’t expect to see him and thought that he was up doing rounds of watch and checking on the other soldiers but she suddenly remembered his words earlier the day.

 _“I’ll be seeing you tonight before you sleep”_ she remembers him telling her.

Remembering how he breathlessly whispered those words on her ear made her shiver in the chill of night. She knows she should not feel nervous but she can’t help feeling like a nervous wreck when her eyes saw and focused on Levi standing at the end of the corridor.

She can’t move and she didn’t know what to say either, no words coming out from her mouth which was a bad sign of her being beyond nervous. Why was she even feeling this way anyway? This man sure does have weird ways of messing up with her mind.

Levi closes the gap between them and held her hand, staring deeply into her eyes and pulled her along with him. He held her hand carefully, placing small circles on her knuckles and palm. They didn’t say anything to each other as they walk but did have a few glances to each other. She smiled sweetly at him whenever he will look at her by the little movement his eyes makes and he felt that he should not return the smile or smirk, save it for later he thought.

Wordlessly, they arrived into the deeper, lower southern part of the castle that she too was not familiar with. Her eyes travelled to observe it and at the end was a door, can’t help but wonder what it was and where it would take them.

Levi opened it slowly, with a little trace of numerous lights coming from the inside, making Hanji feel giddy with excitement wondering what she would see. Levi gestured differently tonight, once he opened the door, he let her go first, swinging his hand slowly to indicate that she goes first, which really made her surprised. She agreed, nodded a bit then stepped her foot inside the room.

Her eyes first travelled around the sides of the room where the lights were coming from. She was marveled to see a handful candles spread across the room, mostly were on the floor and some were on the top of the crates. The crates were very well organized, each on top of the other and the bigger ones placed beside them. What caught her attention were the two sleeping bags that were spread in the middle of the room with two huge pillows (which was odd because they only have the smallest ones during their missions so they wouldn’t get to sleep that long and it would be easier to bring), with even a few flower petals on top of it.

That made her giggled but then she felt a hand on her wrist, gripping it lightly. Her eyes looked at her hand to see Levi’s hand holding it. Her eyes soon travelled towards his face and saw that he was staring at her, not sure if it’s awe that she sees in his face or amused.

Her giggles halted and were replaced with a huge grin. “Did you do this Levi?” she asked, licking her lips. It was weirdly romantic.

Levi nodded lightly, a slight color of crimson crawling on his cheeks. Hanji can’t help but laugh in the inside as he looked so nervous and embarrassed to her. It was actually his first time to do such thing, especially this sort of thing. Moblit actually helped him pick and choose the rightful flower to be strangled and have its petals spread across their made shift bed, something that will make her happy and giddy, as the other flowers themselves were set in the middle of their makeshift bed. They searched for them along the walls of Sina, flowers that would need to be taken care and costs too much but knew that it would be worth every bucks since it is for her.

To hide his embarrassment, he scooped her up and placed her along his right shoulder like a sack of potatoes. Hanji let out a surprised gasped but let him carry her the way he wanted, trusting him that he would not throw her off that easily or lose balance and have them both slamming their faces flat on the floor.

He placed a kiss and bit her ass’ left cheek causing her to squeak and hit him in his ass in the process. “Levi!” she giggles and continued to rub his ass. “I love your ass. It’s small and firm. It’s so smooth too.”

He smirked and made way towards their made shift bed. He balanced her carefully back into his arms and cradled her like a baby, eyes never leaving each other.

From that moment, he knew deep inside his heart that he truly, deeply loves her as well.

And that he wanted to have more of this kind of weird experiences together with her, weird, funny and worth remembering, something that will unexpectedly melt his heart all because of her.

Hanji places her arms playfully behind his neck, clinging into him as he cradled her. She smiled brightly at him, inching closer to let her nose rub his. He gulped hard with the contact of her nose to his, wondering why she just makes him feel this way.

Maybe because of her long absence in his life that he suddenly had forgotten what it feels like to play around with her, even if he kissed her passionately earlier the day.

“I miss you” he whimpered, closing his eyes and feeling the nuzzles that she is now doing along his face. Hanji nuzzles her nose along every inch of his face and scrubs her cheek to his.

“I miss you more” she replied back.

“No, I miss you the most. End of discussion.” Levi barks back, wanted to let out a small laugh of how he thinks their conversation was.

“I never knew that you can be this romantic” she says as her breath tickles the skin of his neck, making his hair of his body stand all of a sudden. Light kisses followed after her nuzzling on his neck, making him hold onto her tighter.

He suddenly didn’t want to lose her anymore, he wanted her all to himself, safe and sound on his arms embrace, away from any pain or danger and kiss her worries away.

“You should have known earlier,” his words made her look up into his eyes “if you only didn’t left me” his voice breaking against his will.

Hanji’s eyes turned bitter with guilt and looked down on his chest, indeed guilty of being away from him and even not wanting to see him. Levi places a gentle kiss on her cheek and she looked back deeper into his eyes, eyes full of regret and silently asking for forgiveness.

“You’re here now and you needed me, so it doesn’t matter anymore” he reassures her. He feels a bit awkward saying that because he doesn’t want to sound too proud and high and shit but he knows that she _does needed him_ so he knows that he is just saying the truth, no need to be in more in denial.

“I need you because I love you” she tells him, making his eyes widen with surprise. “And besides, you are the only one I really, really want. What I did was rea----“

She was silenced by Levi’s sudden attack on her lips, massaging her lips with his. He slowly bents down and places her in the middle of the sleeping bags, not breaking their kiss. Her hands travel along his neck, his hair, his chest--- oh she badly missed him so much.

When he pulls away, face a few inches away from her but forehead stuck to one another, she breathes in the air that she needed and saw his beautiful narrow gray eyes.

“I love you Levi” she bluntly says, her finger tracing his nose and lips. “I really do, badly.” and gave his lips a quick peck for affirmation.

“Wanna talk about it?” he asked her.

“About what?” she asked him back, eyes wide questioningly.

“Everything” she watched his lips opened and closes and licks her lips, wanting to be kissed by those rosy thin lips of his again.

“If it’s okay with you, I don’t mind”

“Of course I do, just give me a minute” he started to move away and kisses her head.

Her eyes were filled with sadness as she waited for him, looking on their sleeping bags and warms herself with her arms. It was quite a chill tonight, she thought.

Levi came back with two cups of tea, each on one hand and gave her the other one as he settles himself beside her. She honestly wondered how he got it but also was amazed because he really did prepared for this and for everything. She looked at him first to see if he really wanted to make her talk as he made himself comfortable beside her, gazed at him behind her glasses. As for him, he admired how her eyes even looked way more mesmerizing with the beam of light flashing below her glasses.

“Tell me everything” he tells her and places an arm around her. She sighed and didn’t even made herself comfortable under his touch, which made him worry.

“You don’t have to if you don’t want, I understand.” He searched her face whose eyes still glued on the pillows. It worries him that he might make her remember some things that she shouldn’t remember or not comfortable with discussing.

“Hey” he whispers into his ear.

“No” she muttered, meeting his eyes once again, her voice firm and strong. “I want to let you know.”

Levi sipped his tea then kissed her lightly on her lower lip. “Then be my guest.”

Hanji let out another long sighed and drank her tea. It was delicious and she didn’t even knew that Levi could produce a tea this delicious in a place like this.

“I don’t even know where to start” she started. She isn’t much of a story teller, ever, almost like always a lecturer and hoped that Levi wouldn’t mind of how she would say it.

“Well, the fat bastard started becoming different. He bought me clothes, helped me shop, bought me things that will make me beautiful but he said that he wanted me to become a real, lovely looking woman so that he could be proud of me. He even said that he can’t wait forever because I didn’t said ‘yes’ over his courting, I just wanted to see and know him even longer, which I suppose was alright, but it wasn’t for him. He said that his patience has a limit and could only wait with a maximum of four months for my approval.” she stops and looked at Levi, waiting for an answer or even a reaction. But he was too drawn into what she was telling him.

His hand travelled to look for her free one and held it tightly, telling her that it is still alright and that he is still listening to her. It encouraged her to continue talking, seeing that he still wanted to know more. She smiled at him sadly and sipped the tea that her other hand was holding.

“After that he had become different. Always drinking, sneaking out at night that in the morning I could smell him that badly. I even heard Mike, rather Mike told me that he smelled the asshole like some drunken bastard he was and that he has been missing meetings and drills. He didn’t want me to worry so he didn’t tell it to me earlier but he still did ask me about it and warned me, even Erwin warned me and trust me, it really was an ache in my heart for him to see me and tell me that I am already becoming an irresponsible researcher of the Corps.” Hanji’s snorted and drank some more tea to calm herself down a bit. Levi just listened and watched eagerly but something inside of him was struck when he heard her say that it greatly ached her heart.

She must have really liked that bastard.

Too bad she loved him better and not that asshole, Levi thought, comforting himself from the sudden pinch of pain that he felt.

“After that,” Hanji continued, sipping from her tea then focused her eyes on him. His hand gripped on her waist carefully and she felt comforted quite easily. “he eventually changed even more. He started talking to me harshly as though I don’t have any feelings and then one time that I shared my hypothesis or theory to him, I don’t really quite remember and he disagreed way harshly, telling me that I should let myself believe in my daydreams and fantasies. It made me feel really bad, like I am some kind of a pathetic sorcerer or some kind of witch.”

Hanji can’t seem to continue but she need to finish what she started telling to Levi. She sighed and continued.

“Then he told me that I am so lucky to have him, someone who is fortunate enough to stick and listen to my shitty ideas. Then remember the night I bumped into you all of a sudden when I was about to see him?”

Levi nodded. “The night you suddenly appeared on my room and we had that amazing four round steamy sex where you were so damn hot and even refused to stop and sex me up?”

Hanji didn’t know what to say. She wanted to laugh but realizing it, she can’t, not when she realized that she immediately used Levi in order to remove the horrible feeling that she had from Georges and to make sure that she really does love Levi the most? Still, she loves Levi, forcing herself from such negative idea.

She shyly looked away from his eyes to his chest, a huge amount of hot boiling blood going up on her face as she recalled how they had made love during that night.

Levi felt her uneasiness so he stood up and took her tea, placed it on the top of the nearby crate together with his and scooped her onto his arm and brought her up into his. She was surprised of his sudden movement that her hands immediately wrapped itself on the back of his neck.

Levi watched her as her breath ragged and she trembled under his hold. He wanted to tell her, to secure her that all the pain that she had felt won’t return to haunt her anymore and secure her away from any other possible danger that could harm her. But all he can was just to cradle her and listen to her as he watches her speak.

She was still scooped in his arms like a baby, hands behind his neck when he makes himself comfortable on their make shift bed and nuzzles his nose on her face as he sat on the floor with her on his arms.

“What happened next?” he asked her along her ear, making her shiver even more. His nose on her ear was then replaced by his thin lips and gave it a kiss, as well as her cheek.

Hanji presses herself into his body and he welcomed her with such delight, placing his chin on top of her head, fingers slightly brushing her cheeks. She then squirmed on his hold, her lips the same level on his ears.

“That day,” she mumbles into a whisper and Levi leaned in to listen. “I was waiting for him the entire time but he didn’t showed up and I got so worried so I went to see him on his room then I saw you. After seeing you and went inside his room, he was there, laying on his front, face flat on the bed, totally drunk. He was still even holding a bottle vine that time. I wanted to laugh and tell him that he will totally lose into you if the two of you are going to have a competition drinking, he will lose for getting drunk that easily.”

“I don’t even know if that’s really a compliment” he told her, since he was actually able to learn how to handle and have such high liquor tolerance due to times when he was young and get too drunk many times. He tried to ignore the thought away, he is not as bad anymore, he is a soldier now, and he reminds himself.

“It is for me” she tells him and smiled. When he smirked at her, she returned her chin on his shoulder, lips near his ears. If she was comfortable whispering, it was alright for him. Besides, she always talk so loudly that this a good change for a while and it even feels even more solemn just having the two of them, no noise in the middle of the night.

“Then he just stared at me and then started yelling at me” her hand transferred to grip on his shirt and the other just held tighter on his nape. Her sudden change of tone alerted him that she is starting to feel unsure and difficult so he pressed her harder to his body so she would be able to feel that he is there for her and that he is still listening attentively.

“told me his bitch” Hanji turned her head to look at Levi, showing her wet eyes filled with unshed tears and Levi felt a sudden pain his chest. He never in a thousand years wanted to neither see her cry nor shed tears, it was really discomforting and annoying and all he wanted to do was to kill the person behind those tears of hers.

“I mean, I know I shouldn’t get mad or get affected by that but he kept on repeating and it repeating it and I felt really horrible. I know I am not but remembering---“ she stopped, her breath shallow and fast, eyes suddenly away from his. He stretched his hand to get her eyes look on him again but she flinched away. He was surprised by what she did so he kissed her forehead instead.

“Remembered what?” he asks her, feared that she might freaked out and suddenly felt guilty of asking.

Hanji can’t blame Levi for asking though since she left her last statement a huge cliff hanger in the first place. She exhaled carefully then returned her eyes to meet his, eyes full of embarrassment and worry.

“That word kinda had an effect on me because I, we, I mean,” she was really having a hard time telling it to him and he was just there, staring at her, waiting for her to say it. She then felt her face burned and decided to gather all the strength and bravery that she could find in order to tell it to him, whether it is a bad idea or not.

“We always have sex even if we are not totally in a relationship” she whispers, pressing her face on his chest, hiding away the embarrassment.

“It made me feel so dirty that I get to do it with my own comrade” she continues, not removing her face on his shirt. “I felt like some horrible, wondering dog looking for sex and meant nothing.”

Levi suddenly moved, shifter her from his arms, making herself suddenly look at him in disbelief. Their eyes met, and she felt horrible and scared.

“Does it mean nothing to you, Hanji? All those times? All those nights?” he asked, his voice a bit broken and eyes a bit pained. “Aside from that, you agreed because you told me it is good for my heart to avoid heart problems because having sex at least twice a week for men will lessen the risk of having heart diseases. You said it yourself right?”

“Yeah but----“

“That means you have a purpose, you have a goal, you wanted to help me and that is far being selfish you know that. Giving sex to help your comrade? That was a hard decision and thing to do, do you even realize that?”

“I ah---“

“No, I’ll explain and clarify that fucking wrong statement of his and drill into your head that you. Are. Not. Horrible.” He tells her, his index finger poking her chest in every word.

“Everything that you do were selfless, all for the benefit of others. You even tend to give your life away and become a freaky scientist in order to give answer in of the mystery of the titans and understand them. You even intend to rot away your life and give it all for the glory of mankind and of the Recon Corps.” He stops, eyes never leaving hers. He felt his heart aching and wanting to stop since he sounded too shitty but he can’t, she needs to hear him out after listening to her.

“Look, everything that you did, or do, you always give out your best and too passionate for every single thing. I want you to remember that you shitty idiotic glasses. I can’t believe that you are too stupid to realize that to yourself.”

“Levi” she whimpers, he is becoming emotional, she thought but his words are making her knees weak and quiver all of a sudden. She was scared that he might notice since she is still scooped on his arms.

“And tell me, how can he say that your theory was shitty? Did he even contributed anything significant and smart for the study of titans or life or whatever fucking study it could be where mankind would benefit?”

“Ahm,”

“Answer me!?” his tone was a bit higher and her eyes widen with surprised.

“Nope.” She mumbles

“Right! Then he doesn’t have the right to tell you that you are wrong or your inaccurate or shit. And if he can’t appreciate you as beautiful as you are or who you really are, then he is a huge pathetic, sore asshole for forcing you to look beautiful in the way he liked it. That only proves that he is not a huge gentleman that you first saw into him. He is a nasty, rotten big pile of shit.”

Okay, Hanji thought. That was too much but he did mentioned that she was beautiful as to what and who she is, and she heard everything correctly, she is not hallucinating she is sure but she can’t seem to accept that or was she just too surprised? She never considered herself beautiful nor had heard him or anyone say that she is but the way Levi is telling that, her heart was just crumbling into sweet dust.

“And how can you just say that a woman is a true definition of a bitch when she has an intention in her head to help and not just to fuck?” Hanji’s eyes were softening and tears were threatening to fall, not understanding if it’s due to his words or that she realized that she was indeed stupid and feels guilty of leaving Levi for Georges or that she was too blind and naive to even think of Levi’s words way before she had done a single thing that caused her her own misery?

“To top that, how can you consider a woman a _bitch_ if she only has sex with one fucking person all the time? Aren’t dog bitches has sex with more than a bunch of male dogs with no intention of helping or shit to their fuck partners?”

Hanji agreed, he was right, how can she be so stupid? She opened her mouth but nothing came, misery and embarrassment succumbing her totality.

“That is not you Hanji, never you and never will be. You’re nobody’s bitch and you are not one in the first place, understand?”

He shook her a bit to wake her up from her deep thoughts and listening to him that eagerly and loss her presence. Thinking about it, he has more right to call her his bitch than Georges but Levi never did.

“Understand?”

“Yes,” she nodded endlessly. “I understand you Levi, I’m sorry”

“Say sorry to yourself because if there is anyone who deserves an apology, it will be yourself because you’ve been acting like a teenager who wanted to have some goody goody gentleman boyfriend” he snorted out. In truth, he was also hurt by his own words, knowing why she did such a thing---- because he can never be a man who can gently hold and take care of a woman and make them feel loved. He didn’t told her that, he doesn’t need to because it might be her turn to get mad at him and scold him for that. This is the first he could get to scold her for her little stupid ways and he is way having fun and feeling mighty, since he never get to be correct in lots of ways, most especially if she has got to do something with it.

“Okay, fine but----“

“And look,” his voice was serious this time and he leaned in closer to her. She can smell his breath and even count the number of sweat now starting to pour on his forehead. “I have never considered you a fuck buddy or whatever nasty word that you can think that you think you deserve. You are mine now. From that moment, there is this nasty, fucking sweet feeling burning hard on my chest that I know I feel for you, and it’s not just as having fucking buddy kind of bond shit.” His eyes were expressing a different thought, and she is slowly being enlightened.

“I just thought that my actions made it clear but I was wrong. Fucking wrong and I almost lost you from that asshole.” He said as his hand gripped her shirt behind her in agony.

Her smile is starting to grow and he didn’t like it, he is now the one who is starting to feel panicky and nervous.

“I just hate labels or what we call each other, I only care and knew now that you are mine as much as I give my entire self to you.” He confesses, not knowing if he is making sense at all.

“I mean I th----“

He was halted when Hanji crushed her lips to his and started massaging his lips with hers. He can’t help it and gave in, eyes closing in contentment. When she pulls away, he opened his eyes to protest. He was even moaning when she was kissing him then she pulls away? What the fuck was that for?

“I am all yours Levi” she tells him and he leans in for another kiss and she returned with ease, kissing him long but gentle on his mouth, her lips then travelling on his cheek and neck, making him moan and hiss and ecstasy.

“I was just too stupid to realize that”

“Yes you fucking did, you shitty glaaa----” his eye twitch when she kissed a sensitive part on his neck, making him grit his jaw and hiss away. He had his hand grip on her hair as she punish him with her monstrous mouth.

“I’m your shitty glasses” she tells him in between kisses. “and I am all yours Levi.”

 _Yes you are, all mine_ he mumbles inside of himself but scared to claim her that loud, scared that he might lose her all of a sudden and he would be left alone in this mean nasty old devastating world. All of he loved was taken away from him, and he can’t afford to lose her as well.

She is the only remaining one now.

He gripped on her hair and then pulls her away, panting and staring deep into those chocolate brown eyes of hers. He gently kisses her on her mouth this time, contradicting the way she had kissed him earlier as his hands traveled along her shirt and freeing her from any form of clothing that she had.

Hanji was giggling as she tilts her neck as Levi placed kisses there, abusing the freedom that she is giving to him and surrendered everything to him. He opened her shirt, threw it on the floor as his hands caressed her breasts and freed it from her bra as well. He placed kisses on her chest, then leans closer to place kisses in the middle of her valley then finally to her breasts.

Hanji allowed him to suck on her small perky pineapples. Levi started with her right while his hand kept the other one busy, his fingertips pinching her nipple and groping her entire left breast. Hanji let out a chuckle as she pushes Levi’s head further onto her, interlacing her fingers to his smooth raven hair. She just absolutely loved the feeling of his head back into her chest again.

She bit her lip and closes her eyes as Levi slowly arches her body backward, carefully placing her flatly on the made shift bed for them to share for the night. When she was lying flatly on her back, she giggled as Levi stared at her naked top and smirks at her. That was also the moment he removed her lower clothing as she is now bare right before his very own eyes. He swears that he might be able to see her naked for too many times already but he still always craved to see her bare and nothing to hide to him, always giving him the excitement and thrilling feeling. It’s as though he had never gotten over her again and again.

“Unfair! You’re not naked yet!” she screamed out and stood by her elbows, bring Levi back to the reality.

He gently pushes her back to their bed sheets and stripped himself off from his clothing. Hanji, being stubborn as she was still stood up and helped him get rid off his clothes. She was jumping on her seat with joy when Levi finally able to strip off his shirt and uniform, and was only left with his pants and socks.

As she kneels down in front of him and she looked at him with hungry and excited eyes, she unbuckled his belt and pulled his pants down with his underwear. She was happy that his crotch is at the same level with her chest, sitting down in front of the kneeling Levi.

She laughed with pure joy when she saw the same length that had entered her for million times already and had her hands excitedly stroke it as Levi felt his knees shaking with her touch. He groaned and closes his eyes so he could focus on her touch. When the feeling of high sensitivity rose and he felt himself going to his edge, he gripped on her wrist and opened his eyes to look at her.

Her eyes were hungry, tempting even and inviting.

He had no choice but to fulfill her needs and his so he didn’t waste any time and devoured her mouth instantly as he carefully wrapped her into a protective embrace, his hands wrapped completely onto her bare skin as her fingertips ticklishly rubs his chest. They remained like that for a few moments, treasuring the moment that they are sharing that they weren’t able to do so for quite some time. The tiny kisses that she even places on his shoulder were just antagonizingly sweet and he didn’t want her to stop.

She then pulls away and stared deep at him in the eyes and he knew from that moment that she wanted to make love to him, those words finally getting into the right place as he did so.

It started when he kisses him so eagerly with pure ecstasy and gentleness that she never knew that he had and she responded with the same amount of gentleness as well this time. Their forehead bumps and it made her laugh and shrugs it off and continued to places kisses on her neck to her chest. She drew her head back to let him kiss more of her chest and neck as she pushes his head further to her, feeling the nuzzle of his nose as he kiss her more.

She bits her lips when he started to play on her breast, licking around her areola first before he plunge to scrape her nipple with his teeth gently as he busied his hand with her other breast, massaging it as she had wanted it, just like how he does it a while ago. But this time, he places kisses by her breast’s sides and it made her even warmer--- and wetter.

Even if he had done this a few minutes ago or even before, she still can’t get enough of it, can’t get enough of him.

Hanji turned on her back as Levi continued to place kisses onto her, and gladly continue to place kisses into the place where she wanted him to. Not long after he reach her lower back, kissing and licking her warm skin, his hands marveled on her ass and gave it a squeeze. He stopped and saw her looking at him.

This could only mean one thing.

“Want me to enter you at the back?” he asked with a bit full of wonder.

“You got that right.” She squealed and bit her lip. She’s getting anxious and she wanted it hard.

“You sure? Isn’t it too early for that?” Levi asked again since normally, she would always prefer him on top of her and enter her behind lastly after a few rounds.

“I want you deep and fast Levi.” She teased, voice full of lust and want.

Levi still looked with at her ass even if he is preparing her for him to enter, his hands locking tight on her hips and just stared into it. He really wanted to please her but tonight, he wanted to just purely _make love_ with her and not just fuck around like they usually do. He wanted this time to be different, just with love and not lust.

“Aw come on! Here, I’ll give you a hand.” She crawls on to his lower abdomen and took his length, grasping with her both hands and stroking it gently as she could. What she is intending was really working, he got hard in just a minute and he let out a growl of appreciation. He combs her hair with his fingertips leans back when she suddenly gulped his whole length into her mouth.

Her hands immediately gripped the base of his penis and alternately massaged his balls, giving him that electrifying excitement and worry. He is doing filthy great as she eats him hard, her tongue tickling his shaft and massaging it with her tongue as does her hands to her balls. She didn’t stopped with that and even places kisses on the body of his penis. He sure is loving it but he is worried now that he might suddenly burst his seeds inside of her mouth. Not that he minds it but he wanted to make her cum first so with huge amount of effort, he leans onto her, kisses her forehead gave a bit forceful pull from inside of her mouth.

“What’s wrong?” she asked worriedly and places her hands on his thighs. He twitched with the sudden touch that she had made to him.

“I want you to cum for me first.” He tells her and urged her to turn around.

“You jerk.”

“What?”

“I wanted you to fuck me from the back but you refused so I lead first and gave you a hand. I was already giving you the chance to make me cum first and now yo---“

A smirk was already forming on Levi’s face and then he stopped her suddenly from blabbering by locking his lips into hers. Hanji still had kept on talking as he massaged her lips but then she gave in, seeing how Levi closes his eyes as he kisses her was just so cute and she couldn’t help herself but to kiss him back with same eagerness. So she cupped his face with both of her hands and kissed him gleefully. Levi could even feel her smile in between their kiss so he grabbed her arms and gently lead her to lie down flatly on her stomach.

“You ready now?” she asked teasingly to him, some of his spit draping at the corner of her mouth. He should be getting disgusted with it but this Hanji, the woman he loves and since when did dirt even mattered to her anyway?

She took it as a yes when she saw a grin on his face and held on her hips like earlier and braced herself for the usual quick slash of pain that would eventually be replaced by a great feeling of pleasure.

Levi had guided himself with is hand as he entered her slowly, taking his usual rightful amount of force and pace as the roars of Hanji boomed on his hear. The roar of his name coming from her thin lips made him shiver as his length bumps inside her thick walls, carefully scribbling itself towards her, eliciting that tingling sensation that Hanji had wanted to feel.

Not long after, he managed to move gracefully inside of her, he improved his speed and quickened his pace. As always, he enjoyed pushing and pulling her tiny waist and plunging deep inside of her core as she moans and grumble his name which is the best thing he loved to hear. It was addicting and he wanted to hear more from her.

Hanji’s knees are aching a bit but she is sure that it is tolerable enough and be wrecked more by Levi in the half.

As the excitement and high feeling of arousal came to build up, his fingernails deepened unto her skin but not enough to scrape and make it bleed and at that very action, Hanji knew that he is about to spread. So she stretched out her hands to held on Levi’s wrists on her hips and held it tightly.

With that gesture, he understand that it was okay to spread inside of her.

So he did.

He went in inside of her as deep as he could, holding on to her hips for his dear life and yelped in fury as he spread his seeds inside of her, taking no second to even stop.

As for Hanji’s part, she loved it, every bit of it, most especially that she is confident that it is pretty much okay for him to do such thing. Feeling his liquid spread inside of her was just a heavenly feeling as she did to him, spreading her juices around his length.

When Levi felt that he is done, he let out a deep and long exhale of breath and gently caressed Hanji’s butt cheeks with his fingertips before he pulls himself out of her. The sloppy feeling and ecstasy made him let out an unexpected groan and he didn’t bothered wiping himself this time.

Hanji saw he what he did and stared at him with wonder, eyes full of question. He saw how she reacted so he gave her a smirk and gently laid himself beside of her.

“I still want to feel your remains still within me, shitty glasses.” He mumbles and placed one hand under his head and the other to curl around her quivering form.

She chuckled back and gave him a quick kiss on the lips. “Don’t try too hard to be so sweet, Levi.”

“I am not.” He retorted back but Hanji still can’t help herself in hiding her laugh. Levi thought that she looks fucking adorable with her hair disheveled and trying to stop her laugh so he gave her a smirk and took her chin with his fingers and brought her face so he could give her a kiss full of appreciation. Hanji smiled in the kiss and placed her hands on his hair to play with it.

Levi tried to be gentle on that kiss but Hanji deepened it and was the first one to let her tongue out and explore his mouth, feeling the back of his teeth and upmost part inside of his mouth. Levi made an awkward gurgle sound due to the surprise that he felt once she had done that but shrugged it off and return the same amount of kiss to her.

They stayed like that, locking each other to one another’s embrace as they enjoyed kissing one another, massaging each other’s lips, feeling each other’s caress, placing kisses to each part of their skin. Moans, deep breaths and even curses has been lead out but they absolutely felt that is way different this time, not like the other times that they had sex.

Levi fixes himself on top of her again, not halting the kisses that he is giving on to her lips and traced a few more on her jaw and lastly on her forehead. Hanji knows that he wanted to enter her again so she gave Levi a soft and sweet stroke on his length to make sure that he is very hard and not just a minute, he did became so. Not long after, he enters again inside of her and Hanji let out a deep gasped and then bit her lip with excitement as Levi had started to move slowly first. She gripped on his very muscular arms and hooked her leg on his hips to encourage him that he could now go on faster.

Levi didn’t missed a beat so he did, moving himself inside of her, feeling her slick and thick walls suck on to him completely and he enjoyed the feeling like he always does. He scrubbed himself inside of her and watched her breasts juggle as he moved even faster, their bodies now slowly moving away from their make shift bed due to his massive speed and Hanji had started to move wail, her mouth wide open so he plunge in his two fingers their and she gave it a suck.

As he thrust further fast on to her, he watched in awe as her breasts juggle, shaking like there’s no tomorrow and her face be completely covered in pinkish hue. Hanji had let out his fingers and arched her back as she inhaled very deep and place her hands around his neck as Levi now captured her back and continued to thrust again he carried her body slightly like that.

The sounds of their skin slapping one another and the squishy sounds that their very personal organs are making are making him feel on the edge again but he has started to feel tired as well but he didn’t stop until they reach their limit again, even if it’s only Hanji who would explode it would be alright.

But Hanji, being sensitive to the man losing himself on top of her felt that he is losing energy, she decided to clung further on to him and move her hips along with him, now pushing herself further for him and lessen the effort that he is giving to keep him awake. She stared deeply onto his eyes and he immediately understand what she is trying to tell him and that it is okay. Their hips moved in one sweet rhythm and now that she too has been giving out her efforts, she had unceremoniously balanced the efforts that he too is giving out just to please her.

Levi drapes his head on her shoulder as he imprisoned her body on his arms, their hips moving together like some kind of wave in a water current. He felt so safe and so at peace that he closes his eyes to feel her around him, working together with him just like they always do best. He licked her ear lobe and kissed her jaw and Hanji could only moan his name, like he what always wanted to hear and gave way to let him kiss her on her neck and jaw.

The feeling was completely different indeed that even if they are not in a comfortable bed and that they are in a mission and anytime anyone could barge in and tell them they needed to move, they didn’t matter.

Nothing mattered.

Levi thought that as long as he could get to feel high and happy with Hanji as they let out and reach their needs, nothing else would matter. He could completely feel that this time, there is no pretension between them, no pretending that they are lovers tonight and wake us just friends and comrades but be another great time together and erase the bad thoughts away, remove all the worries and be at ease even for once with no worries of her getting owned by another again.

That she is now completely his.

He is the only one now who can declare ownership of her heart as she could also do the same thing towards him. He completely like that, and now they could move and act the way they like it, no more boundaries, no more limitations, no more hiding.

“Ah! Haaa!” Hanji suddenly gripped on Levi and locked him even deeper on her body as she contained herself together as Levi has been brought back to reality and focus onto her again. Now that he is back to pleasing her, he knew that she is almost there so he did his best, moved faster, bumps into her walls until she closes her eyes, leans back only for him to carry her now jellied body after she screamed his name with full desire.

Damn, he really can’t get tired of that kind of thing that she does, most especially if she leans herself backward like that on his arms as she screams his name. It was too hot.

Hanji breathed in deep and relaxed as she felt herself dripped together with him and calms her breathing. She thought that Levi would be placing her back to the sheets but he didn’t so she places herself on top of his lap and embraces him, kissing his jaw, biting his shoulders.

She had completely felt the difference with this one as well, that even if he moves vaguely the same like before, she saw how Levi had smiled most of the time as he moves inside of her and watch her with eyes with no worries at all. She also felt the burden that he is carrying on him had completely left him and she felt light with him as well. She felt the ease of his body throughout hers and she did her best to feel the same despite the shiver and wobble of her body is emitting because of the high pleasure that that they are having.

So the moment that she reached the heavens and spread her blessing around him, she fixes herself on top of his lap, embrace his tired body and showered him kisses along his jaw, neck, shoulders and scalp. They stayed like that for a few minutes, catching their breaths and treasured the feeling of one another in each other’s embrace.

Hanji cherished the soft linger of Levi’s fingertips along her spine and felt his breath ragged on her skin and she also didn’t missed the fact that Levi has been pushing his head further into her embrace, into her chest as though his entire life is depended on her. She found it really cute so she pulled a little away and gave him a chaste kiss on the lips.

“You alright?” he asked her and she just nodded and gave his nose a squeeze of her fingers and kiss him between his eyes.

She hugged him again but tighter this time, as though she is scared that if she lets him go, she would lose him for all her life. She knows she shouldn’t because everything is now in its proper place and that there shouldn’t be any kind of worry that they should between them. She felt his lips brushed on her chest and had it stayed their she embraced him, his face completely on top of her breasts while Levi listens to her now slowing down heartbeat.

Levi suddenly chuckled out of nowhere and Hanji stared at him in bewilderment. “Why are you even laughing clean freak?”

He didn’t gave her an answer to her question and instead, gave her a kiss on her side breast. She tucked her fingers even deeper to his raven hair and kissed his jaw. She sighed, not knowing of what he is thinking and allowed herself to stay in that kind of way with him.

It was relaxing, the way he handles her like that and lock her with his securing arms. He cherished the warmth that her body is emitting and even now felt her opening squirting out some oozing hot liquid which is now dripping on his leg. He is not sure if she could feel it since she just taps her chin on top of his scalp and let out a deep sigh.

All of a sudden, she leans her lips on his ears and whispered like an angel to him as she gently tugs him tighter along her body. “I’m all yours now Levi” she whispers to him and he couldn’t do anything but to grip on her body tighter. “I give you my body and heart now, I have given you my all. Please do not think that Georges managed to do the same thing that you did to me but I couldn’t just bring myself to allow him to that do the same things that you are doing to me you know?”

Levi stared at her but not knowing what to feel. He did felt his heart crushed a bit when she mentioned that asshole’s name but found hope when she mentioned that she didn’t allowed that asshole to held her just like he does. He can’t afford to think that she is lying too since this is Hanji, _his_ Hanji, the very Hanji he had known for years and had known and loved. She would be honest and tell him everything if she is needed be and is not fond of hiding some things to him.

“But he didn’t hurt you, did he? Or else I’ll fucking strangle him and pull his balls out.” He threatened and Hanji laughed, swaying her head from side to side in disagreement.

“No Levi, I had him knockout right?”

Levi kissed her chin and returned to look at her deep in the eyes again. “Yeah, I might be forgetting that _my_ Hanji is strong and can kick ass.”

“Yeah and I can kick your ass too you know?” the sudden chill that run across his spine when he accidentally declared that she is his suddenly disappeared from her fucking statement.

“Oh yeah?” he threatened and scooped her to tuck her gently on their make shift bed and crawl on top of her. She laughs and wraps her arms around his neck.

“You just called me yours, Levi” she bumps her forehead into his lightly and closes her eyes. She had completely forgotten about her capability of kicking his ass though.

“Well, you just told me yourself right?”

“I was not really aware that I was already yours for how many years now. Such a shame I just realized it now.” She said a bit sadly and Levi could only just nuzzle his nose on her cheeks.

“Doesn’t matter. At least nothing was destroyed or whatever shit. I still ended up having you, that’s what really matters.” The way his eyes conveyed his emotions made Hanji stiffened and wanted to cry. His eyes looked so down and reaching out deep inside of her, as though he also looked so scared of something as well.

“You’re right” she assures him and traced his cheek with her thumb. “I still had you, and this time, we won’t get separated from each other. Nothing can separate us from one another.”

“You promise me?” he asked, making sure that he won’t really lose her or even come near to that point just like what had happened to them this time.

“I promise.” She agrees and nuzzles her nose on his chin and lips playfully, not breaking their deep eye contact.

They had locked stares and then Levi kisses her deep, full of want and full of need as her hands travelled to capture his marvelous face on her hands. He went inside of her mouth deeply, feeling every corner of her to assure himself that she is there and that he is not dreaming or having any shitty illusions.

When they stopped, they had each other’s lips on each other, glued and tight. She giggled as she played her lips and nose to his and he smirked all the time she did so, staring at each other’s eyes.

There were no hesitations this time, Hanjji thought and it was very overwhelming. She doesn’t need to worry that she is being _dirty_ or _nasty_ like what she thought she was before and just completely being bare and no pretentions being all lovey-dovey with the man she loves now.

She doesn’t need to pretend anymore that she is pretending to be some kind of an in love woman, because she really is now and she knows that the man she loves does loves her as well too. Their kiss, their touch, their movements, it makes sense now and it is different, completely different. Full of want, a bit of lust but mostly with love, and she figures that it is a perfect combination, and why she had realized it so late?

Her crazy smiled turned into a sadder one all too suddenly and Levi panicked and felt bothered by it.

“What’s wrong?” he cupped her face and gently held it as he leans it a bit on the side so he could place a playful kiss on her and make her giggle, which he succeeded.

He gently places themselves on their make shift bed and he tucked them together. Hanji still kept on giggling until a small yawn escaped her lips and Levi stared up to look at her. “You sleepy now, four eyes?”

Hanji could only just smile at him and pull him to give him a kiss on the forehead. “Yeah, a bit. You know you always tire me.” she said sheepishly and Levi gave her one last deep look in the eyes before he nods.

When they are settled and Levi throws the blanket to their naked bodies to warm them and place his arms around Hanji. She pushed herself a bit away so he wouldn’t be able to and nuzzles her nose on his instead.

Levi was surprised of her sudden jolt of distancing herself away from him. “What, where are you going?” he asked worriedly.

Hanji only placed a sneaky kiss on his lips and took him dumbfounded and turned her back on him. She took both of his hands, pulled him closer to her back until she felt that same warmth on her skin and felt the familiar poking feeling of his length behind her. Levi places his chin onto her shoulder and whispered.

“You wanted to sleep now, four eyes?” he asked her in a husky voice and tightened his hold around her.

Hanji leaned in deeper into his hold and clasped her hands to his, lightly scrubbing her fingertips on his arms. “I want you to fuck me this way.” She commanded, direct and teasing.

Levi was astounded at her request first but then felt the usual urge that he has--- to make her happy and to please her. He had always promised himself that he would make her happy and contented to him, no matter what it would be. Her request was not that difficult and yet he find himself a bit troubled by it. He just doesn’t want to tell himself that he could make her happy only through this kind of way and convinced himself that he _does_ can make her happy in a lot more ways aside from this, but for the meantime, do as she request him to do.

“You sure?” he asked to confirm her and placed a gentle kiss on her shoulder.

“Yeah, I’d like to be fucked that way.” She tells him and continued to caress his arms with her little digits.

Levi’s lip curled up and Hanji felt it along her skin. “If you say so.”

And without a second thought, her hands travelled from his arm to his length and gently stroke it to make it even stiffer than what it is already and be prepared for another round of pure ecstasy and pleasure that she is horribly craving. She succeeded and mentally pats her back for her success. Levi had let out a thunderous and continuous yelp from her gesture and she enjoyed every bit of it as much as he does.

“Damn it! Four eyes!” he yelped when he felt his pleasure already coming out. His eye automatically shot in her touch and he bit his lip to contain his further moans, too much pride that he wanted her to have more moans than him.

“Say my name or I won’t stop torturing you like this.” She teased and her fingertips continued to roll from his base to his shaft.

“Fuck it! Hanji!” he moaned escaped his lips and he gripped on her hips hard. He even thought that he had lost himself too much and feared that he might leave bruises on her again.

Hanji still continued to stroke him despite his please and eventually came into her hand, his seed spreading and dripping on her palm and fingers while his hands are gripping on her harder than ever. She ignored the slight feel of pain from his gripping nails and laughed on her teasing to him.

When Levi realized that he was already gripping hard on her hips, he cursed and immediately removed his hold on her.

Hanji, realizing how Levi defensively moved made her really laugh and lean on her side so she could him behind her.

“Now, are you ready?” she asks, giving his nose a small kiss on the tip and gave his length another electrifying stoke on the back of her palm and she earned another curse from him.

“Alright fine, yeah I’ll fuck you from the back.” He quickly pulled her closer into his mighty chest and Hanji squealed in delight, excited and happy at the same time. The moment Levi’s digit gripped on her hips with the right amount of force, and slowly, she felt him enter her smoothly with a few hustle along the way.

She let out a tiny growl as his strong hard length enter her sleek walls, pushing itself further inside of her as she grip on the sheets with pang. When she exhaled, the feeling of pleasure immediately came rushing along his every thrusts. He rode her like some wild beast, even pausing just to make sure he will stay connected with her. Deep and fast, her favorite combination and she is grateful that he is doing it the way she wanted it.

It was no doubt that he was able to reach his limit in a few moments time as well as she, and even made fun of him having releasing his seeds on her butt cheek and teasing him that he ‘almost pulled it late.’

It was like their usual sex.

What wasn’t usual is that when she was still laughing, he immediately turned her around and kisses her deep and sweet. She even felt his smile on her lips, soft and luscious and just perfect on hers as his embrace were the perfect lock on her body. And that even if they were done, he still won’t stop massaging his lips to her and cornering her under his body.

When he stopped and pulled away, she took that chance to stare deeply into his stormy gray eyes, mesmerized as ever and comfortable. Those eyes of his, she figures that she’ll never get tired of them and that she even craves for them even harder every single day. She wanted those eyes to stare at her, adore her and love her like nobody is even capable of loving her and her imperfections.

She wanted to lock her brown orbs deep within those gray orbs forever.

“I just, wanted to have more this kind of thing like this.” He admitted and Hanji stopped on her movement. Her slightly opened mouth turned into a wary smile.

“Me too Levi” she said and she gently pulls him down again into her. His lips landed on her neck and travelled marvelously around it. She sighed and even gently tucks him even deeper into her.

Levi’s breath was ragged and looked absolutely tired so he finally able to rest his body on top of hers, and she gently accepts him. He laid his ears under her breast and heard the thunderous beating of her heart. He loved every bit of its beat, telling him that she is safe, alive and here with him.

Hanji gently caressed his raven hair as she blankly stares at the ceiling of the castle. But then suddenly, Levi moved under her grasp which she earned her a surprise.

“What is it?” she groggily asked.

He only stood on his hands and scrubs his nose on her chest. Without breaking his stare on her, she shivered slightly but she managed to giggle. In return, her fingertips scrubbed his outer ear.

“You’re really mine now?” he asked worriedly, his eyes even showing the same amount of feeling.

Hanji managed to laugh awkwardly and continued to play on his black locks. “Yeah, I am, definitely sure about that, I am yours, everything, my heart, soul, body mind.” She said and gave him a pinch on the nose. “From the very beginning I was already yours entirely, I am just too----“

“Too fucking stupid to know.” He butted in and she nodded very lightly.

“Yeah, maybe your right. Everybody makes wrong decisions anyway you know?” she shrugged uncomfortably, feeling not good of staring right on his eyes.

“I fucking know that, it’s just that, you’re too fucking blind as well.”

“You can’t blame me, how should I know? I thought I don’t make sense to you and that you only wanted my body.”

“Fucking ass. That is just stupid you know?”

“Alright fine, I’m sorry.” She admitted with a slight taint of pink on her face and focused her eyes on the ceiling and the floor of the room, anywhere except Levi’s. “Even if you really didn’t admitted it.”

“But I did showed it. You even said it yourself, that actions speak fucking louder than words right?”

“Yeah but still! It wasn’t that convincing! I thought that you were just messing with me!”

“I was not messing with you! I can’t believe I agree having you as the brightest one here!” he argued back. He doesn’t want to fight with her this way so he cleared his throat and brought himself back down into her body. He heard that same heart beat and felt her same sweaty skin onto his.

“Look, Four Eyes, I don’t want to fight with you right now.” He breathed hard and inhaled her sweaty scent. “I just wanted to-----“

He paused for a while, unsure of his words to tell her. He still feels so weird and new with this that she is _finally_ his now with no other worries to think over.

Hanji felt him become tensed over her and decided to make him relax and calm down, scrubbing her fingertips along his spine while the other played on his hair. It seemed to work on him since his breath became even and slow.

“I know” she continued his answer, knowing and sure of what he is feeling this time and what he is intending to tell her. She may still not be that sure but knowing him, she just can’t afford to think that she is wrong this time.

“I know that you just wanted to lie down with me and rest, right?” he didn’t said anything but she did felt that smile moving along her skin and his head, crashing deeper into her chest. She definitely knows that he is just being shy and can’t admit his feelings.

“You don’t need to be shy Levi because even I myself, wanted to just stay here with you. I don’t want anywhere else but to be with you.” She said and Hanji can’t help but smile to herself but along that smile she could definitely feel the tiredness wrapping upon her entirely.

“I don’t mind that” he tells her and before they could even know it, they fell into sleep quickly, with their chests breathing along in the same rhythm.

 

**-x-**

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**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all, I had real huge problems pasting my work here so I uploaded first this chapter in my FanFiction account last Wednesday, November 25. 
> 
> Well at least I still managed to upload this chapter here.
> 
> Basically Hanji relies and trusts the natural way of not getting pregnant and knows when she is exactly ovulating and crap.  
> We’re almost to the end you guys! Two more chapters to go and we’re done! :D
> 
> Anonymous:  
> Thank you for telling me that you find the love confession really interesting :D I hope this chapter was okay for you too! And thanks for your support and reading this!
> 
> Miruna.bogdan.336:  
> Here yah go! Thanks for reading and for your support! 
> 
> Clair Chevalier:  
> Hi! Sadly I don’t plan of giving them any baby in here :3 I just can’t feel it working so yeah, sorry about it : ( but thank you so much for your time to read my fic and giving your review! It really means a lot! :D
> 
> Hairydryer:  
> Thanks! Here yah go! Nly two more chapters and we’re done! Hope you like this one though :D stay awesome!
> 
> Guest:  
> Thank you so much for all your reviews and for taking time to read my fic! :D
> 
>  
> 
> Thanks for the follows and favorite!
> 
> AllysaHaven  
> HelBerryInx  
> TheRockAngel  
> Secretslockedintheheart
> 
>  
> 
> See yah on the next chapter!


	20. Loving Every Breath of You

**Chapter 20:**

**Loving Every Breath of You**  
  


**-x-**

 

Levi didn’t know how he does it but everytime that they are going to have the kind of moment together just like last night, he is very down to it, feeling an amount of lust towards her as she does to him but he thought it would just end that way and lose everything that he feels for her but he would spend his day ending up thinking of how she was, if she is eating, if she took a bath or if she is even sleeping. That thought had always hunted him and no matter how much he tried, he can’t stop thinking about her even once in a while or even just a minute of his everyday life. He knows that they have just a different kind of bond but his heart his telling his brain otherwise.

But now he had found the answer to that confusion, and he had never felt calm before.

He watched over the sleeping form of Hanji who is now using him as a pillow, breathing deeply and soundly sleeping. She looked so peaceful and calm, away from any kind of worries from her work and away from any danger and pain of the world. Levi always wanted to see her that way and vows to keep everything that will make her sad away from her as possible as he could.

She is the only one that he really treasures in the entire world now and he would do anything to make her smile every single day and soundly safe.

Levi tucks her deeper into his chest and the still sleeping Hanji nuzzled her nose on his chest. He smirked as the way she did it made him feel a little feeling of tingle. He scrubbed his fingers lightly on her hair as he blankly thought of the possible days that they are to have starting this very day.

Levi stared out onto the very few windows of the room and had seen that the sun is still asleep like Hanji. Despite of that, he knows that it’ll only be in a few more minutes, they needed to get up, clothe up and prepare themselves for their journey back to the walls as early as they could, not until the sun is setting up so that they can still hide from the titans and since they could see a bit of their way back, a perfect way for a safe trip back to their home.

He carefully slid himself out under Hanji’s light embrace and gently placed her body flatly on the thin sleeping bags and slightly cover her naked body with bedsheets. Fortunately she still continued to breathe in and continue to sleep deeply, much to his relief. He doesn’t want to see her bouncing up and then hurrying herself again to prepare for the day, as if nothing happened between them. He just wanted her to wake up in a different manner just like he did, appreciating the time that they had and then just at least savoring the afterglow and the minute that they have only for one another.

The pants, underwear, shirt, belts and of course, his cravat was back to cover his body and hid away the evidences that they had shared throughout the night. He didn’t mind to wake up early since he got all the amount of sleep that he needed anyway and decided to prepare for Hanji’s morning wake. He put out the tea that he brought especially for this very moment and some food that Moblit hid for them to eat in case they felt hungry.

When Levi turned to see if Hanji is already awake, he was surprised to see that the woman he loves is still crazily sleeping on the sheets. A small smile crept on his face and he made his way towards her, his footsteps light but a bit fast since he feels excited. Placing the tea and some fruits beside their makeshift bed, he gently tucks her hair behind her ear and places a gentle kiss on her hair and cheek.

Levi moved a bit to see if she will moved but she didn’t, still breathing sleepily. He sighed, but the tiny and rare smile on his face didn’t fade away. After fixing a few things away and gathering all of their things, even if it just basically Hanji’s clothes, he heard the grumble of a waking woman behind him.

Turning his head to find the source of the sound, he tried his best to contain his laugh and witness the woman he could now claim as his is looking devilishly hot, naked with her hair all over.

She looked like a hot bread out from an oven that he would really want to eat.

That reminds him. Speaking of bread, he went to return beside her and made himself comfortable. Hanji in the process stared at him as she saw him approaching and stopped scratching herself and instead, covered herself with arms, rubbingher skin warm.

“Morning” she grumbles as Levi sat beside her.

“Hey” was all he muttered and took her green Recon Corps cape beside them and placed it on her shivering body. He pats her lightly and Hanji gave him a kiss on the cheek. Her nose even scrubbed a bit on his face and he can’t say that he doesn’t like it.

“Here, eat this. Sorry it’s cold though.” He apologizes as he handed her the food that she started devouring happily.

“But this one is surely will keep you warm.” Hanji beamed at Levi as she watches him prepare some tea for the both of them, handed it to her as she took it with sarcastic grace, where he snorted a laugh.

Levi placed himself beside her, placing an arm around her nervously, feeling her naked body long his clothed one. He actually liked the feeling, making it extremely perfect such cuddle weather and a hot cup of tea. If he would be honest, he would want more times like this with her, no worries and just sharing a hot cup of tea and feeling each other’s presence.

They didn’t talked for a while, Hanji in the other part just continued to devour her food like she does and sipped some tea to help her swallow her food. Having Levi around her once again after a time being away from him made things a bit awkward having him around her, since she knew perfectly well that it is her fault that they were separated from one another. But now that she could feel his warmth on her again,

“Hey” Levi whispered as he nuzzled his nose lightly on her naked skin, eyeing her carefully as she sipped her tea.

“Hm?”

“How are you feeling? Is there anything sore?” he asked, always knowing that she being so thin is too vulnerable of pain and could easily get bruised.

She giggled a bit and gave his cheek a kiss. “I’m okay, kinda used to it.”

“So you _do_ feel sore and in pain.” He worriedly told her, placing his cup of tea all in a sudden as it surprised her.

“Not really, seriously Levi I’m okay. You over reacting, you know that?”

“Over reacting your ass.” He snorted and took his cup of tea again and made another sip, looking over the messy clothes she left on the floor.

“I had a great time last night” Hanji started and placed her head down on Levi’s shoulder as he looked in awe at her, his nose nuzzling on her hair. ”you were very sweet and all, I really appreciate your sweetness Levi.” Hanji can’t stop herself and gave his lips a sneaky kiss, which he took as a surprise.

“Thank you.” She whispered and nuzzled her nose on his shoulder.

Levi gave out another snort. “Don’t scrub your dirty mouth on my clothes, Four-Eyes.”

“Stop being shy, and I am not scrubbing my sweet lips on your shoulder.” She retorted back and brought her face away and stared out at her.

“whatever.”

Hanji just smiled at the look of Levi blushing and took her cup of tea and sipped it again before taking another bite on her fruit that he gave her. She even made herself more comfortable on his arm and he stopped awkwardly to let herself be set comfortably along his arm. Once she is all settled, they continued to eat and feel each other’s presence.

“Thank you for not ignoring how I feel for you.” He blurted out all of a sudden, making Hanji instantly looking at him and halting on her breakfast as the man still continues to sip his tea just to hide his embarrassment. He wonders why he is still embarrassed where in fact, he shouldn’t. Maybe because they are now in a more intimate kind of relationship that he never thought that would happen to him.

“And for reciprocating it.” He added again, still being all bashful towards her.

Hanji kept on blinking at Levi for his words but as for him, it still made him feel a bit uncertain, he wanted to ask her again if she is really his this time and if everything is okay between them and that if she would be with him forever, if she is okay and all. But then he found himself awkwardly in a difficult position but when he managed to open his mouth and talk, a loud knock suddenly barged the door.

“HEICHOU! BUNTAICHOU! WE ARE ABOUT TO GO AND THE COMMANDER IS ALREADY LOOKING FOR THE TWO OF YOU!” Moblit nervously told them and knocked endlessly on the door, sending the two jump into their places.

“What the fuck!” Levi cursed and helped Hanji stand up, giving her her clothes and helping her wear them. Unlike him who still wanted to ask for another ten more minutes to be with her and do nothing but to eat and nuzzle his nose on her head, she no longer responded and jumped like some kind of ninja and wore her uniform.

When everything was done even finishing their food in a fast last pace, Levi told her that they would be leaving their makeshift bed on the floor and that they would just take the flowers that he gave her, even leaving the candles from where they stand.

He saw Hanji made a sad and angry face.

“Don’t worry about it, next time we stay here again if we are to spend the night here.” That made her smile again and give him another deep and soundful kiss.

“I’d like that” she tells him and stared deeply into his eyes, cupping his face. He was reluctant at first but then he gave her another deeper and stronger kiss to endure, just like how he liked it, not just soft but sometimes deeper and stronger kind of kiss.

When they stopped, he looked at her if she looks okay with her messy clothes, took her hand and pulled her out of the room as she held her flowers closely into her chest. Moblit was just right outside when they went out, greeting them with a very worried expression as the other two were the opposite.

Together, they went to see their very ‘worried’ commander, hand-in-hand.

 

**-x-**

Getting back inside the walls was like the usual but Levi needed to stop himself from looking every minute at Hanji, which everyone saw and asked everyone if she is okay. He badly stopped himself from going beside her all the time and wanted nothing but to pull her inside their rooms and rest and cuddle so when they got back inside the walls, he made his last few objectives in a quick pace, checking the younger ones if they are doing their final and last roles for the corps, discuss with Erwin and check his squad.

After a growl of annoyance, he finally able to get back inside his room, get cleaned so he could make out with Hanji with himself entirely clean, though it took him five fucking hours just to finish his last duties before he could get to do what he desire. It was even already nighttime and he feared that she might already be asleep, he would be left with no choice but to watch her sleep instead.

Opening the door to his room surprised him to the fullest, but somehow told himself that he _should be_ aware of such thing to happen for that very moment.

It was Hanji, laid on top of his bed which is now messy, even though he is definitely sure that he had arranged it before he even went out of his room. Aside from his best surprising him, Hanji was the bigger deal. Her clothes were slightly opened, her legs a bit parted and she was snoring already, definitely tired as fuck.

A smirk ran across Levi’s face.

The look of Hanji on top of his best made him feel a slight excitement and tingle along his body. He wanted to come and join her right there and nuzzle his nose along the valley of her breast and lay his head there as he too, joins her to sleep. But honestly speaking, he also feels a bit kinky and wanted to do her up even if she is asleep. She’ll be surprised to wake up and see herself drowning with his hot seeds, a punishment for her sudden breaking and sleeping on his room.

She looks ready herself and like asking for it. Her upper garments a bit opened, her straps of the gear removed and her fingers were slightly curled, the other one on her head the other one on top of her abdomen. Her hair is still tied though a mostly disheveled but painfully cute and hot for his taste. She looks so heavenly and Levi wanted to be just beside her. She might be still dirty after their mission and she looked like she definitely didn’t took a bath by her looks. She might have ran immediately into his bedroom after her mission after duties.

At least he knows that he is the first thing on her mind after work.

Hanji definitely looked so peaceful that he cannot even move on his very place. With shaky movements, he marched on the direction of his bed where his crazy beloved is sleeping like a rock and carefully fixes the bedsheets on her thin body.

Levi decided to clean himself for a while before joining Hanji to sleep, brushing his teeth and washing and doing a quick shower made himself convinced that he really is ready to be with her on his bed. Afterwards, he crawled beside her and made himself comfortable with her as well.

He was hesitant at first but reminding himself that she is his entirely, he managed to wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her lightly as he could. He didn’t want to wake her and disturb her from her deep sleep so he did his best not to wake her up and just cuddle with her instead.

Unfortunately, Hanji felt the force and warmth of his hold to her and she groaned lightly, making Levi panic a bit and pulled his arms away from her when she suddenly grabbed them back again and returned them to their previous position on her body.

“Levi” she groggily said his name and he tucks her closer to him.

“Hm?”

“You smell good.” That made him smile. He crawled a bit higher than her, being able to place his chin on her shoulder and give it a kiss.

“Dam right I always do.” He felt her squeezed his arms around of her. “You know I always wanted to look presentable to you, even if you don’t do that to me.”

“Do you want me to?” she asked a bit hurt, trying to open one eye at least to take a peak but all she could see was the light of the candle, the semi-dark room and feel Levi curled around her. “I’m sorry I don’t focus that much about that, you know I am not fond of it and wasting my time beautifying myself.”

There was worry on her voice and Levi panicked inside once again, afraid that he might have hurt her feelings. They might always tease each other but she sure sounds serious this time and he didn’t want to make her feel bad again or pressured.

“Who told you that I fond of women who are engrossed of fixing themselves for long fucking hours just to look attractive? I like you this way because it’s all too natural and not fake for some kind of shit. No make or whatever shit that you place to yourself just to look gorgeous and hot.” He exclaimed, hoping it will make her feel better.

Hanji smiled to herself and closes her eyes, ready to return to sleep once again. “Thanks Levi.” She murmurs and in an instant, immediately went into sleep.

Levi couldn’t stop thinking things, he still can’t remove the thought that she is finally his and that it is really, really official. That they can do all things together until the end of time, until they can and hoped that they’ll stay together by each other’s side. He feels a weird feeling of responsibility towards her now that she confirmed of their relationship, that he wanted to stay longer by her every single day and to take care of her and protect her. Hell he even wanted to stop her from playing with her fucking titan pets and to stop all capturing of titans for her just to be sure that there’s zero chance of her losing any part of her body.

He just wanted to make sure that she will live and won’t go away, just like his other very loved ones.

His mother. Farlan. Isabel.

His grip suddenly became even more rigid on her and pulled her closer than ever to him, squishing her a bit harder it made her swallow a cough.

“I’m sorry, did I wake you?” he admitted and looked into her, tilting her a bit. “Did I hurt you?” he asked worriedly.

“Maybe? Is there something wrong Levi?” she asked, tracing her fingers to his palm on her waist.

But there was no answer from him.

“Hey, I know what you’re thinking. What is it about? Tell me Levi, I could help you, you know that.” She exclaims.

A couple of minutes came to pass but there was nly silence so Hanji thought of just shrugging it off and continue sleeping, thinking that he didn’t want to tell it to her because he doesn’t want her to worry.

“Just worried.” His voice suddenly brought her to life again after a long moment of silence.

“About what?” she asked as she turns around to face him. His eyes were still awake but a trace of tiredness is behind them. She places one hand to caress his fair while the other to fix his hair, despite the heaviness of her eyes and wanting to sleep.

Levi thought hard if he should be telling her because he really didn’t want to bother her but gathered all strength to do so because he wanted to calm down as well because he knows that she could help.

“Should we tell them about us?” he asked worriedly and all he got from her was a laugh.

“Don’t fucking laugh! I’m serious here!” he yelled out and caught her chin, bringing it closer to his, his eyes teasing despite the raising of his voice.

“Sorry! I was just surprised!” Hanji said as she laughed. “Why are you even worried about it?”

Levi removed his hold into her chin and returned to relaxed a bit. “It’s not that I’d give a fuck to whatever they’re going to say about us, what I am worried about is you. You might get affected or bothered or some kind of shit and I don’t want that to happen of course.”

Levi felt Hanji’s hand crawling into his face, tracing and caressing his face. When he turned to look at her, she smiled gleefully, obviously fighting away the sleepiness away from her.

“I don’t care of what they’re going to say about me Levi. I don’t care if I’m an itchy slut that was sleeping with you while I entertained Georges and then chose to finally settled with you instead.” Levi was surprised of her words, his eyes a bit wider than usual. Hanji gave him another sad smile, held his hand and turned herself back to her previous position. She continued to hold his hand as she continues to explain.

“They don’t know me personally Levi, so I don’t take their words personally as well.” She felt Levi curled around her even tighter and it made her smile. When she decided to take a peak onto him, she was to have her nose bump into his. It made her laugh and seeing her laugh made Levi relaxed and not worried anymore.

Slowly, his lips caught hers and massaged it. He felt her smile in the middle of their kiss and she even let out a helpless purr as her hand played along his hair. When they pulled apart, Levi stared into her eyes deeply and gave her lips one last peck where she giggled with glee.

“That’s true but you’re not a fucking slut and the next time you tell that to yourself again, I won’t ever get you any titan.”

“Bu---“

“You were just confused four eyes, confused, not a fucking kind of whore, you got that?” The worried expression of Hanji fade away and Levi mentally claps to himself as Hanji gives him another sweet smile.

“Fine, if that’s what you think so.” She tells him and convinces herself as well.

“It’s the fucking truth, always tell that to yourself.” Levi gave her another sweet deep kiss that was enough to send her into sleep though a part of him is quite bothered that he might still not yet let her feel like she is loved.

He vows that soon, he would.

 

**-x-**

 


	21. Only You Can Set My Heart on Fire

**Chapter 21:**

**Only You Can Set My Heart on Fire**

**-x-**

Hanji was not present beside Levi when Erwin scolded Georges for his misbehavior.

That’s right, scolded is the proper term. Who would have thought that the commander himself is capable of scolding his own soldiers like they are his damn kids? It even goes well with his hand gestures which most of them didn’t thought that he liked scolding with hand gestures.

It was like a symphony of a great orchestra to Levi and he is enjoying every minute of it but the tune changed when Georges suddenly had it quits and busted out from his chair and started to pull the sleeves of Erwin which made Mike instantly pulled the curly haired man off Erwin while Levi instantly kicked him on the balls which made him fall immediately on the floor, making him curl and twist around. Levi managed a tiny laugh under his breath when he saw Georges struggling like that on the floor. He thought that he deserves more than just a kick on the balls but he figures he could have his time to avenge Hanji.

Fortunately enough they were able to made it discreet and had the situation down only within the four walls of Erwin’s office so that there would be less commotion and less chaotic. Erwin took that chance to lower himself down on Georges and grab his shirt and brought it closer to his face.

“I won’t be tolerating such behavior, soldier. I guess I have to send you back to where you belong.” Erwin said with full force and disgust. Georges was the only soldier who is not disciplined enough to properly give time towards his unwanted attitude and lifestyle, most importantly of what he did to Hanji. Levi managed to explain about it to the other veterans and he too as the commander had valued Hanji that much and wanted to avenge her as well, even though his little possible ways.

“I don’t think that’s going to happen since the MP did told me that they are not welcoming him back, that they don’t need a person like him.” Mike explained as he watched in enthusiasm over Erwin.

“Well that’s too bad, looks like I’ll give you to Rico then, to the Garrison. Maybe she would like to have you around in there I suppose.” Erwin retorts back but Levi’s clearing of throat caught his attention.

“Erwin, before you hand him there, could I at least give him a proper goodbye?” he said with a smirk and Erwin and Mike couldn’t do anything better but to just agreed to what Levi had said, knowing what he really means.

As for Levi, he would make this son of a bitch pay for what he did to his four-eyes.

 

 

**-x-**

Hanji may not be present during the moment of Georges execution by Erwin but Levi did ask her if she is interested to at least slap his face off or throw punches and or kicks at him just so that she could have the revenge that she deserves. But for Hanji, she had enough of shit for the mean time. She still doesn’t have any guts to tell Levi about it but she still feels a bit sad and distraught whenever she is to see Georges because it was her first time to let herself fall in love officially but she chose the wrong decision it seemed and had her heart broken even if her decision was wrong.

If only she had chosen Levi all along, she wouldn’t feel this bad.

Still, she guesses that Levi knows about her thoughts because when he asked her to tag along with him and butcher the hell out of Georges after what he did to her but she only managed to swallow down a choke and showed of a bothered smile. Levi saw the meaning behind that expression of hers and he only nodded in return, give her a sweet kiss on her cheek which really made her feel warm to her toes. He gave her hand a squeeze before he reluctantly gave it a kiss as well.

Hanji felt bad about it and as she sees Levi goes off, understanding her shit, she can’t help but feel horrible to herself. She perfectly knows that Erwin is about to slaughter Georges’ ass for being an asshole to the corps but she also knows that Levi wanted nothing to beat Georges off as well to avenge her for breaking her heart.

She sighed deeply, Levi was truly taking her heart out into another level she had never thought it would be at and has been making a mark into her heart. Instead of slapping her face with his words that she should be regretful for not choosing him first and all kind of shit, he never did and had only been nothing but be as understanding towards her and even became more patient to her as well.

Hanji could now see Levi being more into a romantic kind of man and that he is different towards her and how he treats her. She figures that it might be of her confession towards him and how he treated her before where she feels that it was already becoming too much and already below the line. She didn’t want him to stop teasing him either but recently, he had learned to tease her in most proper times.

She couldn’t be even happier with that, she is way too glad that Levi knows her too well.

After Levi left Hanji to have a talk with Georges about his behavior in the corps together with Mike and Erwin, Hanji felt the urge to catch up some time with Nanaba. They had always been so very busy that it has been months since they had to spend some quality time together but when Hanji was finally able to find Nanaba in the entire morning, she finally found her inside the hq’s kitchen, cooking for Mike.

“Hey Nana!” Hanji exclaimed, pitched-high and waved a hand. She was honestly too shy of seeing her since she doesn’t know how to tell her about her failed attempt to Georges and that she finally learned that it was Levi all along who was always been there all the time and she had been literally blind.

“What’s up Hanji?” Nanaba asked and giving her a few short glances, focusing gradually on her whisking.

Hanji looked on Nanaba’s hands filled with ingredients and busily working. “Ahm, I was wondering if I could get to talk to you.”

“Really? About what?” she asked, enthusiasm still on her voice.

“Nothing really, I just wanted to hang out. I kinda missed you, you know?” Hanji confesses and gave her tiny friend a hug from the behind.

“Levi might get jealous!” Nanaba playfully exclaims while Hanji suddenly halted and moved beside her friend. She was honestly surprised how Nanaba found out but there could be a thousand reason how she had found out about her and Levi’s confirmed relationship.

“Yeah, about that, I’d like to apologize for not being honest with you.”

“really, about you?” Nanaba asked as she was halted by what she is doing and looking at her dear friend quizzically.

“Yeah, about me and _that_ guy.” Hanji said awkwardly and moved beside her, eyeing the endless utensils and ingredients present before them. “what are these for Nana? And what are you doing anyway?” she asked, hopefully to lighten the tension building up.

“I’m making a berry tart and a pie for Mike since it is our anniversary today. I am hoping that I could finish this have it given to him after their talk with Erwin.” She replied as she continues to beat, work then places the dirty dishes on the sink. For Hanji, it sounds like Nanaba definitely knows about the conversation of their beloved men.

“Sounds delicious, can I help?” Nanaba’s head suddenly turned towards her direction with a face that is quite unconvinced and worried. Hanji in return could only look back to her friend with bothered eyes.

“Yes you do, as long as you plan to tell that story of yours to me yourself, Hanji.” Nanaba’s voice isn’t that daring since she herself knows that her friend would definitely tell her what she really wants to anyway.

“Of course I would.” A faint smile was the last thing that Nanaba saw that formed on Hanji’s face after telling her what she could do to help and before she even started with her story.

 

**-x-**

Hanji managed to cut the story in a tolerable and nice pace while helping Nanaba finish her baking for Mike. She fortunately didn’t said anything at first and waited for her to finish telling her story, before she makes a rude or shitty answer even though she is not yet finished. She is beyond grateful to Nanaba for being like that, hearing her out first.

Hanji was able to complete her story telling to Nanaba as they work and by the time they finished baking was also the moment when Hanji realized that she had told everything to her. From the moment that Hanji decided to choose Georges instead of Levi to the part where she felt disrespected and hideous to the night they had spent together unexpectedly and started blurting out her true and confirmed feelings towards Levi to his big surprise for her during their latest expedition.

When Nanaba places the baked products that they have done inside the oven was when she then first ought to say a word to what she said. She arches her arms to her hips and turned to face and look Hanji directly into her eyes. Hanji in the other hand was already getting anxious in the inside, wondering of what her friend would be telling her about her decision that she recently made in her life.

But then a tiny smirk crawled on Nanaba’s face that made Hanji also do the same. Nanaba made some tea in a fast pace to drink after some hard and longtime baking for Mike and hands one to Hanji. As they sat together on a table was when Nanaba started to do the talking.

“So are you really sure about Levi now?” she asked as she sipped her tea.

Hanji too, sipped on her tea before answering her. “Yeah. You know about choosing the wrong decisions in life? I guess that’s the worst mistake that I have ever done.”

“But you mentioned that you were just ‘testing’ out if you could have the ideal relationship with Georges, right?”

“Yeah I did”

“Well, I guess that’s the only thing I needed to point out, that love is not science all the time and that people are not like titans that you could just experiment with.” Nanaba tried her best not to sound like a hypocrite or some crazy love guru. She is just purely concerned with her friend and would want anything but to help her and not to suffer the same thing again.

Hanji sighed but beamed at her right after what she had said. “Right, that even made me feel really bad about what I did to Levi and after he even made that big surprise for me? I really wanted to make it up to him.”

She immediately thought of something, anything to make up for Levi’s thoughtfulness towards her. She remembered how she and Nanaba had baked hard for Mike so she thought of something she could make herself to give to Levi. Problem is that she doesn’t know anything she is good extremely good at that could be used for producing anything. Nanaba is no doubt good in cooking and having it compared to her cooking skills was basically making her heart and brain ache. She tapped her head even further for more ideas for Levi which she didn’t even thought that it’ll be that hard in the first place.

While Hanji was thinking her heart out, Nanaba sighed in relief. She is very much happy for her friend for having a life aside from her research and soldier life though she really felt bad of what she had to face and experience in order for her to understand her true feelings for the man she is spending most of the time with.

So it is true then, Nanaba thought, that highly intelligent people are naïve when it comes to love. Though at lease, Hanji was still able to realize her feelings and love for Levi. Now looking at her friend, she could figure that Levi is the one on her mind right now.

Nanaba clasped her hands and placed it under her chin, her eyes sticking only to her friend. “You’re planning to do something with him tonight I figure?” Nanaba teasingly asked. It was a success though as she sees Hanji’s cheeks turn into pinkish rose.

“ _For_ him actually. I really feel bad that since after he gave me that extra sweet surprise and I don’t even have anything to give back to him, even just for as a sign of gratitude for that.” She exclaims, eyes still wondering around for ideas. “I wonder what I could get him.”

“Try inventing something, it’s where you’re good at.” Hanji had her head automatically turned to Nanaba who is sipping her cup of tea. Not breaking the stare that they are sharing, Hanji tried to smile and thought of the possible things that she could probably invent and give to Levi as a gift but no matter how much she tries, she can’t think of anything at all.

“I can’t even think of anything.” She helplessly confessed, face falling from her palms.

“You’re just stressed out. Try taking a break for a while then sooner or later, you’d be able to think of a proper gift for your man.” Nanaba pats Hanji’s hands on her face and gave her warm chuckle.

“but what if he doesn’t like it?” she worriedly asked.

“He will, trust me.” She assures her.

“How sure are you that he’s going to like it?” Hanji’s face is turning even more hopeless than ever.

“He will, if he really loves you he will.”

“I guess you’d base that from experience, I suppose?”

“Yes maybe. Just like if either me or Mike will give each other a gift or something, we could find the right time for it to be used or if not, we would just keep it to remind ourselves of the thoughtfulness that we had for each other. You don’t need to give him something that he actually wanted or needed but give him something that will show your love towards him. Besides, if it came from you and if he really does love you that much, he will appreciate it at whatever cost because he knows that you even bothered yourself just to give him something, most especially if you really worked hard for it.” Nanaba even added another reassuring smile just so she could really convince her friend.

Nanaba stood up and took Hanji’s almost empty cup. She assumes that she is already done with it and that if ever she is not even really done and she took it, she would hesitate to let her take her cup. But she didn’t argue so it means that it’s okay for her to take it already.

When Nanaba places the cup away and returns to Hanji, she gave her friend a slight squeeze on the shoulder. “Don’t forget, it’s the thought that counts.”

Nanaba left Hanji alone on the table and when she gave a quick glance to her, she could swear that she’s going to be okay.

 

 

**-x-**

Hanji thought hard and even thought more as she walks on the hallway, taking Nanaba’s advice and take some nap to rest her overworking brain. She knows that she has work to do but she already managed to do half of it already and could finish the rest within the day and giving herself a break and thinking for a gift for the man she loves isn’t that bad. She even rarely does that so she believes that what she’s doing isn’t that bad at all.

She was too submerged on her thoughts that she didn’t realized that she suddenly bumped to the main reason of her endless thoughts on her head.

“What the fuck? You alright?” Levi caught her as she almost bumped into the bricked wall. He gently gripped on her shoulders as he caught her but all she had to give her was a confused face.

“What’s wrong?” he asked again to bring her back to reality. All he could see is her surprised face, eyes wide and mouth slightly opened.

It took a few seconds for Hanji to realize of what is happening and tried on focusing on the person who have her. As she tried to focus, it was the man she could now declare _hers._

“Levi” she murmured, slightly panicking on the inside all of a sudden. She should not tell and blurt out that she wanted to give him something and that she is currently having a hard time because of that.

“What the hell happened to you?” Levi asks again and Hanji straightened herself up and give him a smile.

“I was off to my room, I feel sleepy I wanted to take some nap.” She did said not lying.

Levi just gave her a hard stern look before he nodded and took her hand and drag her along the corridor on the way to her room.

“Levi?” she blurts out, looking at the strong hand holding hers and dragging her towards her room.

“I saw you working your ass in your laboratory and going from one place to another after I last saw you.” He exclaims and continued to drag her. “It was nice to have you remember yourself once for a while and give yourself a break.”

Hanji was not able to say anything after that and the moment that they reached her room, he carries her surprisingly making her surprised, placing her in the middle of the bed, removing her shoes as he also removes her ponytail and places a glass of water on her bedside table. Levi places himself beside her and combs her hair with his fingers as she looked at him in complete surprise.

“Go to sleep. You need to rest, I don’t want you throwing your guts out again.” Hanji had her mouth hanged when he said that but wanted to die laughing to see Levi looking all so flushed. So he too is also adjusting with this kind of relationship that they have and as she observe him more, she couldn’t feel but be more grateful for having him and feel so happy seeing him so cute.

“Thank you, Levi.” She whispers as she settles her head on his stomach, letting his strong but magical fingers to drive her to sleep.

As she prepares to sleep, she vows that she wouldn’t just let this rest that she would be getting to go to waste. She promises herself that she will work her ass off to give Levi a gift of love and appreciation.

And at that very last moment before she sleeps and rest in the middle of the day, on her lover’s arms, she thought of the perfect gift that she could give him.

 

**-x-**

It was one hectic day to kick some ass of an asshole who had made his Four Eyes cry and feel bad like that so once Levi finally get back inside of his room to sleep directly without telling about what he had done to Georges to his beloved Hanji, wanting it to be a surprise and all, was in turn surprised of what he had seen inside of his room.

On top of his bed is a newly made black crochet glove potholder with his name on it in elegant silver color. Levi was caught surprised by it and immediately traced his fingers along its depths. Wondering who made it as he twirled it around his hands, he suddenly heard a very much familiar snore.

It was Hanji, head tightly sleeping on top of her arms as she was sitting uncomfortably on a chair beside it. Levi then made his move towards her as the newly made glove potholder were tightly held by his hand and then lightly shook Hanji.

Hanji made a gurgling noise from her mouth and slowly opened her eyes, slowly met those familiar strong grey eyes of Levi’s. She tried to smile but her sleepiness in preventing her to do so and Levi noticed it so he scooped her up, carried her and placed her on his bed. He took off her shoes, her brown jacket uniform, slightly opened her white shirt, combed her hair with his fingers and places a small kiss on her forehead.

“Idiot, you shouldn’t had bothered.” He whispers to her, not knowing that she is still awake.

Hanji opened one eye to look at him and poke his nose, awkwardly grabbing his attention and holding it himself. “I thought you were asleep?”

“Yeah I am, but I heard you and felt you carrying me and it woke me up a bit.” She said and let out a yawn.

“I guess I’m sorry about that” Levi exclaims and places a finger on her nose. “But seriously, you really shouldn’t had. And why this?” He held the newly made potholder glove right in front of her and dangled it a bit.

She smiled at first and laughed a bit before replying to his question. “To protect your hand when you’re making tea.”

Levi can’t help but smile at her answer. She awfully looks cute with her hair down and spread all over. He gave it a try and wore it, his fingers perfectly settling on it. It felt really warm and perfect on his hands, giving his fingers a close-open exercise. After checking how it is made and felt even more of it, he figures that she really made an effort and exerted all time just to make a beautiful one as like it.

“Besides, that would remind you that I am capable of doing girly doings.” She added and closes her eyes, tucking her hands under her chin.

Levi looked at her direction and watched her breathe in. It’s true that she is not fond of doing domestic activities unlike him. He even excels better in cooking and cleaning compared to her, and she even finds herself having oddly difficult time in simply preparing tea for him. And doing a crochet definitely put her into a heavy and huge deal, maybe that’s why she seems too tired and sleepy already.

“Yeah, I can see that you have already proven that.” He tells her and she only smiled, without even opening her eyes. “You can also use that to protect your knuckles when you punch people on the face.” She exclaims and breathed in.

That caught Levi surprised, did she knew how he badly tore the face of Geogres? Looking at his knuckles made him realized it’s a yes. His knuckles were all red and torn, but he still can’t wonder how she knew where in fact that she just saw him the very first time right after he had butchered the asshole.

“Am I right with that?” she asks and Levi could only just kiss her cheek softly.

“Yeah Four Eyes. Can’t help it, I don’t like seeing you crying and wetting your pants after.” He joked and it made Hanji choke a laugh.

“Fucker.”

“I’m a greatest fucker you could ever have, don’t you even dare deny it.”

“I’m not saying you aren’t.”

They both shared a laugh but Hanji let out a bigger and longer yawn and that made Levi realized that his darling four eyes is already yearning for some goodnight sleep.

 

**-x-**

 

It started with a little bit of doubt, even though everybody were all used seeing the two of them together and basically doing things together at the same time as well. From eating to trainings, it would be very unusual if they could be seen together far from one another.

And that’s how things started to get strange.

After Georges has been banned from joining both the Military Police and the Survey Corps for his crappy and irresponsible behavior, Hanji and Levi had both been more open and obvious of their new confirmed relationship. The hand holding that they do in public, Levi suddenly placing his arm around Hanji whenever he would see her talking to a man that they both know or not, Hanji placing a few sneaky kisses on his cheeks, Levi’s constant hair shuffling of Hanji and the two of them giving one another a few little squeezes when together.

The other soldiers felt confused and surprised but as for those who are close to them and knows them better, were not surprised at all if they would be seeing them ending up with each other eventually. No one even dared to bring up or mention the name of Georges to Hanji because it makes her have her emotional imbalance, making her sad then later regretful into finally being liberated. Levi didn’t like it and is definitely up into a killing spree if they make her feel that bad again, and he just really hate that name, making him giddy with anger and ready for battle if needed be.

Not long after, the young soldiers started to move their asses like taking a peak to each of their leaders’ rooms, hoping to witness some action or something worth gossiping for. The other veterans no longer cared to ask since just seeing the two being too carefree locking lips or giving each other a kiss on the lips right before their very eyes. Quite surprising really but in the other hand, really nice to see that the man that most people know to have such a hardened heart was able to love a woman of intellect but together, they were able to share one heart of compassion and love.

Whether true or not for their comrades, they are still too happy for the new found love for their little captain, hoping that he will soften up a little as well for everyone and that their squad leader will somehow lessen her obsession with her research and be given a new reason to be obsessed with.

Little do they know is that they have been too obsessed already with one another long before they could even tell.

And as for Levi, he still couldn’t believe such thing happening to him. He never knew that he could love someone such way with great vigor like a drug. It might be a little uncomfortable at first but as he get along with this new profound relationship with Hanji, he couldn’t deny that he is the happiest. He definitely feels not alone anymore and that someone admires him for who he really is, seeing not in the way that most people do and most importantly, a new home, someone to share build dreams with.

He is most certainly sure that Hanji feels the same way towards him, from the new way her smile curls in her face whenever he is beside her, her touches and her more sincere kisses. He feels really shy about it but he feels really blessed to fight for him as well and together, they could do any with each other. He is only hoping that she could pull it through her family about him, since they both know that he has nothing to be proud of except for his useless title.

But as they share the moment of the night, curled to one another’s body, they are more definitely sure that they don’t want anywhere else but to be with each other’s arms.

“Levi?” Hanji suddenly spoke into his ear, her hands crawling to caress and trace his chest and neck. Levi turns his face on her head, his lips placed on top of her head.

“What is it?” he asked back.

“I love you.” She tells him.

“You perfectly know that my feelings are way bigger than your, Four Eyes.” He snorted and she laughs and smacks him slightly, a laugh comforting in all sort of way. They both continued to envelope on each other’s embrace and kisses before falling asleep.

Levi couldn’t feel even more blessed.

 

 

 

**-x-**

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -x-
> 
> Since Nanaba is a great cook in the Chuggakou series, I decided to have the ladies to have cooking as their quality time together. :)
> 
> Seriously, endings are always the hardest parts for me to do -,-‘’ I don’t really know why but it’s like I am running out ideas or some shit. So yeah, sorry for the ending. I kinda don’t want to make it overdramatic or some shit. Nevertheless, I am so happy that it’s finally done! I mean, it took one whole year to finish this fic (including some new added chapters that I see and believe to be necessary to be added, final editing). Even though sometimes I really feel that this is not much but you guys managed to convince me that this is fine and okay!
> 
> Finishing this fic for that timeframe was really memorable, fun and just exciting. I really did grew while I did this while facing a few bumps along the way but I never gave up not to finish this fic. One of them is when I started this fic I was still a student and an intern, looking and applying for a position for my chose profession and finished updating it as a professional already working so it really meant a lot. I even had trouble updating this due to my work, kinda never knew that it’ll affect that much to me. 
> 
> And yeah, like I have said, IT IS UP TO YOU whether you would want to connect this fic to my other fics as well or not. If you do, the time line is as follow so you won’t be lost:
> 
> I. Serious Pranks to Wrestlings to Love Making  
> II. Why Can’t I Get Over You?  
> III. Because Proposing is Fucking Hard and Complicated  
> IV. I Never Wanted to Live Without You
> 
> Don’t worry, I’ll be adding them as a series in my AO3 account so you won’t get confused. 
> 
> I also would really like to thank all of your support, comments and reviews regarding my work and it was really fun having you guys to read my hard work :D With this work, I finally knew more people across the globe who are fun to talk with and exchange ideas, you guys rock! 
> 
> Some people that I’d really like to give my thanks to:  
>  Trisha (colonelmags) I love thee my dear! :*  
>  Rokusasu  
>  Drinkyourfuckingmilk for always being an inspiration for me, your works motivates me to write most especially if I am losing the will to do so and with that I am eternally grateful.  
>  Someone stole my socks, for your fics really touches my heart like hell.  
>  Pixie  
>  Claire Chevalier  
>  Miruna  
>  hairdryer  
>  And all the anonymous peeps for your comment, reviews and love!
> 
> Since I have finished this one, I have another one in coming, one is about Hworang and Julia Chang of the Tekken Games Series and another is of course, LeviHan but in an alternate universe and most probably would be released early next year since I already have completed two long fics within this year so maybe next year sounds nice, yes? I really do hope you guys will give out the same support for that incoming fic as well! :D It will be totally new and of course, long with a weird ‘ol title as usual.  
> Thanks for all the kudos, follows and favorites!
> 
> I had this last chapter uploaded exactly on Christmas day so also at the exact day of our Levi’s birthday! :D
> 
> Until next time and see yah on my next fic!

**Author's Note:**

> xoxox
> 
> ladyinblack


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